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City & State or ZIP Tonight, this weekend, May 5th...
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Keeping Abreast of the Situation

The warm weather is on it’s way which means that single women are hitting the gym. We’re in bootcamps, working out with personal trainers, signing up for the classes we have avoided in the past. We want to feel good and look great for summer, and of course turn a couple of heads!

I am sure men are happy that we are peeling away the layers too. They say that men are visual creatures and it’s the woman’s job to appeal to a man.  I think a lot of women want to appeal to men but there seems to be a fine line between admiring a woman and objectifying her. This is especially true when it comes to cleavage.

It would be nice to get some male input: Is too much cleavage distracting? Should women use their cleavage as some  type of weapon of mass distraction? Which situations call for toning it down and when should women flaunt it a little?

I am asking because I think women know that our bodies are part of our visual allure, but we definitely don’t want to hypnotize men to the point that they check out on us. It’s hard to get men to focus when their eyes are constantly dropping down to chest level.

Ladies, do you ever use your cleavage or body to your advantage? Do you find it difficult to be taken seriously when you do? How do you handle your weapons of mass distraction? What do you do when you are out on the dating scene? Does it at all differ from when you go on a first date?

370 comments Add your comment

Raqi...The Milk Jug Mama

May 4th, 2009
8:40 am

Good Morning.

I love the word play in that topic.

LIONESS- Yard Work is a WACK!!

May 4th, 2009
8:49 am

Good Morning All :)

I NEVER use my body to my advantage because I think it is tasteless.. Funniest thing, whenever I wear a tank top, men and women are drawn to my chest area.. Weird cause I know most of the women are straight.. Some women feel the need to use their body for attention because they have nothing else to work with but no matter what the purpose is, to me, it is still unnecessary..

Dan

May 4th, 2009
8:52 am

Good morning folks, hope everyone had a good weekend and are well.

As for cleavage, though ladies like to feel sexy in any environment (and we men like it too), the most obvious response is that less is more at work. While the outfit may be fly (and the woman in it), some ladies forget sometimes that in a professional environment everything matters – perception and performance.

In too many instances, I’ve had to respectfully request that some ladies “tone it down” at work, and that maybe a particular outfit does not portray the proper professional prestige that it could. That rarely happened with women over a certain age, but it frequently happened with younger women that can’t separate looking good from looking professional.

I said that to say that though that fly pantsuit that is maybe a 1/2 a size too small gives you a sexual confidence, sometimes the perception (especially of men) has oft unintended consequences.

Not that any of this would apply to any of the ladies here, jussaying

I-85

May 4th, 2009
8:57 am

You don’t have to over do it, show too much cleavage. You should always show classy and leave a lot of things to imagination. That intrigues man and you earn respect. If you try too hard you will just be respected to that extend

mytw♥cents

May 4th, 2009
9:02 am

Cute topic, WD! Their earnest answers will be too..

Have a sweet n rainy day y’all ;)

Atltwen

May 4th, 2009
9:02 am

It would be nice to get some male input: Is too much cleavage distracting?

It can be at times, absolutely!

I was shopping at Aveda in Stonecrest mall last year; and I hadn’t been in while so I was browsing around. And then out of nowhere. BAM!!!! I mean they all most hit me in the face as I was turning around to be serviced! She was just as tall as I was with heals on – over 6ft – so they were right at eye level. No joking, it was hard for me to concentrate on her demonstrating and selling me one of there very good products because her boobs were, purposefully, jacked in my face!

AmazonRed™

May 4th, 2009
9:06 am

Happy Monday everyone!

Cleavage…what’s that? :( AmazonRed is part of the IBTC. Hey we can’t have it all. :lol: LMAO @ “weapons of mass destruction.”

I definitely downplay my shape at work though. Even when I try to hide it, folks make comments. Folks have been calling me “Top Model” lately. I just don’t see how it’s relevant in the workplace. One girl has taken to eating applesause and tuna fish at work to look like me by summer. (her words – she’s new).

LIONESS- Yard Work is a WACK!!

May 4th, 2009
9:09 am

Dan- I agree! Women that dress wh*reish at work are like that in their day to day lives.. They lack attention when they are dressed appropriately so they MUST show something anything to have attention swayed their way. I prefer positive attention than negative.. Overall, I think it is partly due to lack of self esteem…

LIONESS- Yard Work is a WACK!!

May 4th, 2009
9:11 am

Ared- GROSS!!! Did you tell her that it is natural? LOL!

Sassy Me....tastes like candy :-)

May 4th, 2009
9:11 am

Good morning all……..

I think there is a time and a place for everything. Personally I’ve seen some rather cute outfits at work BUT they shouldn’t have been worn to work…the club maybe but work no. Too,often I’ve seen women get men’s attention like that but they aren’t taken seriously and are eventually looked down upon b/c that gets old and fast….they look at you and may even want to sleep with you but they will NOT respect you at all. Less is more in the professional realm.

Wise Diva

May 4th, 2009
9:12 am

Good Morning sunshines! I hope everyone makes it to work and their destinations safely today.

@mytw♥cents Thanks chica :)

Raqi...The Milk Jug Mama

May 4th, 2009
9:13 am

Dan that’s why we have a dress code. Even our casual days are pretty business casual type. The first year we had a company picnic forced us to implement a dress code for any and every event that centers around the company.

Kym--is feeling waterlogged

May 4th, 2009
9:17 am

Good Morning All,

They are boobs you can’t hide them. If you have them and they are a positive for you. Then work what you got. Doesn’t mean they should be falling out of a bra that is too little and filled with padding. No third or fourth boob look…that is a mess.

Raqi...The Milk Jug Mama

May 4th, 2009
9:18 am

Used to my advantage? Yeah.

When I knew a particular person was attending a particular event I wore and outfit that I knew he liked and had complimented me on. Just it made it do what it do.

AmazonRed™

May 4th, 2009
9:19 am

Did you tell her that it is natural? LOL!

Lioness – I did. I don’t want anyone fooled into thinking I spend all my time in the gym. This girl is really cute too with a nice shape.

Raqi...The Milk Jug Mama

May 4th, 2009
9:19 am

I am not even going to bother retyping that last comment. You all can figure it out.

AmazonRed™

May 4th, 2009
9:22 am

When my girls and I were out this weekend, we talked about the cleavage issue. All of them are busty except for me. They asked one of the girls why she never shows off the twins with cleavage bearing tops. She thinks her chest is too big for her frame, and therefore would rather keep em under wraps. The other two girls in the group typically accost us with the cleavage whenever the situation is appropriate.

All of them would rather be working with something a little smaller and more manageable tho. As soon as they have their kids, they’re talking reduction.

Raqi...The Milk Jug Mama

May 4th, 2009
9:30 am

Kym I agree, the fact that we have them is just a gift from God. However I cannot deny never having purposely worn a bra that gave them a little extra lift. As well as wearing a blouse or shirt that framed them quite nicely. I cannot deny. But I do live by the rule of too much of anything is bad for you.

LIONESS- Yard Work is a WACK!!

May 4th, 2009
9:30 am

I believe smaller breast is a priviledge cause you could fit them into any top.. When I was a 34B, I was able to wear any top I wanted to.

Dan

May 4th, 2009
9:31 am

@Lioness

Sometimes is not self esteem but a lack of understanding the roles that we each have to play in life.

While the spandex (or whatever that material is) and “cute” jacket may be appropriate for church (it isn’t), coming to work dressed in that fashion conveys the wrong message.

On my current job, we have professional dress seminars. And on a previous job, I’ve had to conduct them.

And brothers have the issue too. “Look, the purple tie and shirt combo is nice, but we work in banking. Maybe a white shirt and blue tie, or something to that effect, would be more appropriate. And the four button suit…..”

LIONESS- Yard Work is a WACK!!

May 4th, 2009
9:37 am

Dan- LOL!! Some brothers have color coordination issues.. Also, lay low on the bell bottom pants look..

Raqi...The Milk Jug Mama

May 4th, 2009
9:48 am

The reality of it all is woman was made, sculptured, formed to appeal to the senses of man. We are his desire. Our shapes, curved humps, lumps and scent were all a result of man being lonely and needing a mate that would forever appeal to him. Even in the most modest of attire men will look and be curious and stimulated. So men are going to look. They are supposed to. That’s why some are in fact turned off by the too much exposure, slutty look. We are their glory.

BTW I am married to a self proclaimed breastologist.

The Truth-Wearing a towel on my head and nothingelse while blogging

May 4th, 2009
9:52 am

Dusting off my titology degree to present relevant comments.

On topic: I had a friend that had the sweetest double d’s on mother earth but she always wore my button downs or big shirts. I asked why and she showed me. She wore a tight turtle neck and everyone looked right at them. They stared and really were mesmerized. I was embarassed myself. Never asked her that one again.

Anyway, if you use those to grab attention you better have some mind game because everyone that approches is thinking sex and nothing else. If you cant get them off the nipple mentally your a piece of azz.

Speaking of nipples. Nevermind

The Hawks won. Woohoo

I forgot I hate the Hawks.

Leggs

May 4th, 2009
10:00 am

Good morning everyone. Never used my body to get attention. Heck, I just got butt, hips, boobs and cleveage in the past year. :wink:

I have an announcement to make that can save you guys some money when dining out. BB in few minutes. Hunger headache…need to eat!

AmazonRed™

May 4th, 2009
10:00 am

Truth – I wondered why so many of my big breasted friends seem to hate their DDs (or larger, I have one friend who is a “J”). I suspect that even though their chests look good in the tight tops, when the bra comes off, the boobs sag.

LIONESS- Yard Work is a WACK!!

May 4th, 2009
10:04 am

Sagging tatas is VERY depressing! Orangutan tatas..

There is this lady @ my job that had gastric bypass and lost about 200lbs, no she wears short skirts, low cut shorts(tatas are hanging low) etc.. MAN!!! This chick is about 6ft but she is pulling all TYPES of dudes and she is married.. SMDH!

Poppa Grande

May 4th, 2009
10:05 am

AR

I suspect that even though their chests look good in the tight tops, when the bra comes off, the boobs sag.

Of course they sag. Otherwise, they would look like Madonna’s cone-thingys .

M'

May 4th, 2009
10:05 am

Well, being one who is well endowed…I like my girls, truly…but there is definitely a time and a place for working cleavage and one for not doing so…but as when any situation one should know when it is appropriate for flaunting the golden globes.

As far as it being a distraction, well they sure can not be hidden from plain site…so they will be noticed even if one is wearing a turtleneck…and after nearly 39 years…I guess I am use to men staring at my chest…lol

AmazonRed™

May 4th, 2009
10:05 am

Orangutan tatas..

:lol: :lol: :lol:

SexyCool

May 4th, 2009
10:07 am

It took me forEVER to get some cleavage. Now that I’ve got it. I’m kinda conscious about what I do with it and especially where I do it.

Three Words Daily – Live. Laugh. Love.

MissQC - Birthday Count Down

May 4th, 2009
10:08 am

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MissQC - Birthday Count Down

May 4th, 2009
10:08 am

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MissQC - Birthday Count Down

May 4th, 2009
10:08 am

Morning All- Enjoy this peaceful day from God :)

Kym--is feeling waterlogged

May 4th, 2009
10:10 am

@Dan it depends on the work enviroment. Because where I work the dress is business casual but that doesn’t mean the traditional khakis white shirts for guys, or the black outfits for ladies. There is no way on God’s green earth you are going to get me in all black 5 days a week. I decided even when I switch to working in a law firm it maybe conservative..but there will have to be something wild going on underneath.

abc

May 4th, 2009
10:13 am

It’s not about cleavage. All showing cleavage does is make you look cheap. The only reaction you’ll get is what a cheap woman would get. Hardly what you’re after… well, maybe it is what you’re after, but it’s hardly to your real advantage.

What it’s about is size and shape, cling of the garment, in proportion to a tapering waist. Fat girls that show cleavage are just plain gross; a buxom woman will look best in a nicely tailored suit (in fact, buxom women in suits are just plain hot! Testimonial that showing less skin is a greater impression).

Regardless your build and shape, dress with class, and you’ll get the attention you desire. Just look good. There’s no need to look like a trollop to get a man’s attention.

AmazonRed™

May 4th, 2009
10:13 am

Of course they sag. Otherwise, they would look like Madonna’s cone-thingys

PG – I mean sagging like hanging towards your navel. Not all of em sag that bad, do they?

Poppa Grande

May 4th, 2009
10:18 am

Kym

I decided even when I switch to working in a law firm it maybe conservative..but there will have to be something wild going on underneath.

Maybe conservative??? This is the south!! Legal environments are pretty conservative. The only liberal legal environment tend to be criminal defense. We have had classes in law school to remind ladies to wear skirts and dresses to the court down here. Some judges really look down on females who wear pant suits. Some of my classmates from NY, CT, and RI had to learn the hard way when interviewing for summer positions. This is the south and they expect females in skirts and dresses.

As for non courtroom legal environments, be careful about what is on underneath. We just lost casual Fridays here because a female’s (we have an idea who did) thong outline could be seen and a client (big time client at that) saw it and made reference to it. Not only do we not have casual Friday we have gone all the way to business with suits, ties, and such everyday.

Leggs

May 4th, 2009
10:18 am

I never had clevage. Most of my coworkers knew I wished I could sport clevage so during a meeting they presented me with a gift. When I opened it all I could was crack up. They went out and bought me a “wonder bra” when they first hit the market decades ago. I was thrilled and immediately went into the rest room and put it on. I came back to the meeting, unsnapped my dress and modeled it for them. We had a good laugh that day and still talk about the hudtzpah (sp?) I had that beautiful day :lol:

MELO

May 4th, 2009
10:21 am

Just it made it do what it do
we figure it alright Raqi

Smetimes ladies have to make the biaatch and bad girl in u come out just to unleash those weapon(s) of mass distraction inorder to lure the prey.That happens both ways.Only diff is that the men,in most cases approach,the females play it subtle.
The weapons of mass destruction are desirable and necessary.You just have to unleash them at the approrpiate time,not in work settings ofcourse.
I wld luv some falling boobs…that makes for easy pickings! :lol:
Hwdee folks!!!

Wise Diva

May 4th, 2009
10:24 am

I am SO done with The Truth for today for “titology degree” , LOL that’s a new one on me

Poppa Grande

May 4th, 2009
10:26 am

AR

I mean sagging like hanging towards your navel.

Not all, but they all have to sag some if they are that big.

From what i hear, the muscles underneath can play a big part in that. Having some pectoral muscles that support them makes a difference.

“Goodness Gracious” (aka double “G’s”) are the largest that I’ve dealt with but she was an athlete and did 50 diamond push ups every day. Her body handled them well. They didn’t that much.

I realized then that if they stayed up, they could be a real inconvenience. They already came close to touching the steering wheel when she drove. If they stuck out more, she’d have to drive with her boobs. That would definitely bring more attention to them.

Foots

May 4th, 2009
10:26 am

Good morning! I’m somewhere in the middle with 34C’s. Just enough so I can fill out my clothes but not enough so that men never look at my face. I don’t actually have any cleavage though, it’s kinda blank in the middle, so I’d have to wear a REALLY tight top or a severe push up bra to get that effect. I love my size though. Plenty of folks go under the knife to have “C’s Like These” (catchy song title).

Wise I don’t mean to pry (yes I do), but did Blanca get the ax with the AJC cutbacks I’ve been reading about?

AmazonRed™

May 4th, 2009
10:30 am

They already came close to touching the steering wheel when she drove.

:lol: :lol: :lol:

Foots, I was going to ask the same question about Blanca. The only reason why I didn’t is because this is technically WiseDiva’s week, even tho she covered for Blanca last week.

Kym--is feeling waterlogged

May 4th, 2009
10:32 am

Poppa G there is no way I am wearing something that is fitted that shows a thong outline..or panty line. They make underwear that elimates panty lines. Also, they sell control pantyhose with no toe if you want to have a smooth look underneath with sandals. Hell they sell control thongs that give that same smooth look. As my aunties say there is a way to do everything.

Now I know the legal field has not progress as fast as the rest of the world(dark ages). So I can going to make a few visits to Macy’s for some Jones of New York. Lord knows it will kill me. I hate looking like I am going to a funeral every day.

Foots

May 4th, 2009
10:33 am

Ladies, do you ever use your cleavage or body to your advantage? Do you find it difficult to be taken seriously when you do?

Now, there was a time when I was younger that I was a bit more lax in what I wore to work. They got rid of Jeans Fridays, and so I thought I’d make them wish I had worn just jeans. For a few Fridays, the second I walked in, people would ask me where I was headed out to after work. It was THAT bad. I decided that it wasn’t worth it after one of our directors asked me what I did all day besides look so pretty. I was a degreed engineer! I put my clothes back on pretty quickly after that.

What do you do when you are out on the dating scene? Does it at all differ from when you go on a first date?

On first dates, I want to look nice, and generally, that means to wear something flattering to my figure. But not so flattering that he can’t pay attention to what I’m saying. It’s funny that I can’t remember what I wore on my last first date, but I can remember what he wore. Shows where my attention was, I guess.

Leggs

May 4th, 2009
10:34 am

B L O G A N N O U C E M E N T:

If you go to http://www.diningperks.com you can double your dollars spent while dining out. Dining Perks® are certificates that spend like cash in participating restaurants in and around Metro Atlanta. This is my second time using dining certificates. First used at KC BBQ Pit off Roswell Road (delicious food and great ambiance). Anyway, I purchased $150.00 dining dollars for $75.00. Certificates are good until December 31, 2009.

This is my “stimulus” effort to help the residents of Blogsville!

Kym--is feeling waterlogged

May 4th, 2009
10:35 am

lawd..its monday. That should read..So I plan to make a few visits to Macy’s.

Foots

May 4th, 2009
10:35 am

Amazon Inquiring minds want to know! I heard it’s getting pretty bad around there.

Hey MELO!

Stormy

May 4th, 2009
10:35 am

Hello All…it’s been awhile.

I love my twins….not too big, just right.

Foots

May 4th, 2009
10:36 am

Kym Ann Taylor Loft is a good place for business clothes that aren’t too funeral like…