I ask: What would Thanksgiving be without our annual Field Guide to Tech and Georgia fans? You answer: “A heck of a lot better, you jerk!” Being the stickler for tradition that I am, I choose to ignore you and offer, in the spirit of the holiday, something guaranteed to make both sides spit cranberry sauce across the room. Enjoy!
• Georgia fans refer to Bobby Dodd Stadium as the Joke by Coke; Tech fans refer to the gesture made in Jacksonville by defensive coordinator Todd Grantham as the Choke by the Dope.
• Tech fans aren’t looking forward to a bowl trip to Shreveport; having heard about Shreveport every day for the past year, Georgia fans look forward to the Independence Bowl being renamed the Karma Bowl.
• Georgia fans are still miffed that Tech players appropriated some of Sanford Stadium’s hallowed hedges after winning two years ago; Tech fans are miffed their team has beaten Georgia
The Mark Teixeira trade wasn’t an Atlanta Braves highlight: It did nothing for them in the standings and rid them of two young players — shortstop Elvis Andrus and closer Neftali Feliz — who have helped the Texas Rangers win the American League West. But the 2007 trade was memorable for one thing:
The song (and accompanying YouTube video) “Mark Teixeira” by two Auburn students who called themselves “Tito and the Gun Show.” (Real names: Andrew Hall and Tyler Crawford.) And today I bring happy news:
With a song (and accompanying YouTube video) called, “Thanks Bobby.” (And if you’re asking, “Bobby Who?,” you’re reading the wrong blog.)
The new magnum opus is of a piece with “Mark Teixeira” — one guitar being strummed (by Hall), two guys sitting on a beige couch, wordplay run riot.
Key points of reference in “Thanks Bobby”: A hotel lobby, a lumberjack, plaid, ejections, a pier, chin-nose-chin, Ann Boleyn, a fat kid and pie.
I’m not going to say it trumps “Teixeira,”
Cleveland – I don’t like doing television. Heck, I don’t like watching television. But a local station asked if I’d come on live from courtside at the Q before tonight’s game because one of the anchors took umbrage with this scandalous line from the live Game 1 blog:
“For one thing, they have to live in Cleveland.”
It was, I’ll grant you, a bad little joke. But I’d also submit that, as Cleveland jokes go, it was about the mildest ever. Because I don’t really get into that make-fun-of-the-other-city thing. (Except for Birmingham, Ala. — don’t get me started on Birmingham, Ala.)
Anyway, I was asked to go on the local Fox affiliate with some guy named Bob — or maybe it was Bill — who bills (or bobs) himself as the Mayor of the City of Champions. (Yes, that would, in Bob/Bill’s mind, be Cleveland, Ohio, which hasn’t seen a professional championship since 1964. But I digress.)
So there I am, trying to be a good sport, and Bob/Bill comes on, calls me a knothead, calls my employer