Former Jacket Crittenton needs to grab hold of his career

Javaris Crittenton can’t play in the NBA again this season, not that he’d been playing before commissioner David Stern suspended him Wednesday for the duration. Crittenton has had a bad foot and underwent surgery last month, not that anybody much missed him.

Because Crittenton, not three full years removed from his one season at Georgia Tech, is playing his way out of the league. He left school too soon and didn’t go in the lottery — he was taken 19th overall in 2007 by the Lakers — and has worked his way through three organizations (L.A., Memphis and now Washington) already. And it’s hard to imagine that being suspended for “possession of [a gun] in the NBA workplace,” to use Stern’s phrase, will endear him to any future employer.

He arrived at Tech heralded as the Institute’s next splendid point guard, the line stretching from Mark Price to Craig Neal to Kenny Anderson to Travis Best to Stephon Marbury to Tony Akins to Jarrett Jack. Crittenton had an OK freshman season — not great, not terrible — and led the Jackets to the NCAA tournament. Where, in Round 1 against UNLV, he was called for a five-second violation on the game’s key possession.

And that was that. Even on that losing March day in Chicago, it was widely believed that Crittenton was one-and-done. (At Southwest Atlanta Christian, he’d been a high school teammate of Dwight Howard, who was none-and-done.) Fellow freshman Jacket Thaddeus Young was always considered more apt to stay, even though he clearly had the greater NBA upside.

Sure enough, Young has become an NBA starter and a double-figure scorer for Philadelphia, which drafted him 12th overall in 2007. He has had one team, one home, one ascending career path. At age 22, Crittenton bears the stamp of a journeyman — he has started 10 pro games — and now he’ll forever be known as the other guy in the Gilbert Arenas contretemps.

Crittenton pleaded guilty this week to a misdemeanor charge of possession of an unregistered firearm. He was sentenced to probation and apologized for his actions, but an apology might not be enough. Arenas will surely have less trouble finding another NBA job than Crittenton for the simple reason that Arenas is a better player.

Crittenton, alas, turned pro with a pro body — he’s 6-foot-5, 200 pounds — but not yet a pro game. Another year at Tech and he’d have become more skilled and more seasoned and would surely have gone in the 2008 lottery, and teams treat lottery picks differently than later first-rounders. Crittenton has been traded twice already and will reach the end of the crucial third NBA season without actually playing a game.

Put simply, he’ll have a tough time finding work next fall. The hope is that he grabs hold of himself and his spiraling career and writes a redemption song worthy of Bob Marley. Crittenton isn’t a bad guy, and he has it within him to be a good player. But having gotten so much wrong these past three years, he needs to set things right posthaste.

98 comments Add your comment

Barry

January 28th, 2010
2:00 am

Barry

January 28th, 2010
2:05 am

Stayed up until 2:00 to get the coveted kudos.

Okay Mark, I admit it – I didn’t stay up for column. But the thrill of beating out Willie Martinez has me dizzy.

Barry

January 28th, 2010
2:06 am

And making typos.

Mark Bradley

January 28th, 2010
2:13 am

Usually I make the 2 a.m. typos, Barry.. Kudos for your diligence.

Bob in SF

January 28th, 2010
2:47 am

Always thought Crit was a good player and not great enough to be mentioned with the other GT PG greats and I partially blame Coach Hewitt for that. Crit didn’t seem to get grow his freshman year or really learn the college game much less be prepared for the pros. I know he was one and done but what was Coach Paul doing to grow Javaris’ game that one year? Sure he and Thaddeus got them to the dance but then again being just ahead of the middle pack in the ACC will do that. I fear much the same for this years team; splendid young talent but can a guy like Favors be coached up enough to get them from just showing up to actually accomplishing something in the Big Dance this season?

lazyboy

January 28th, 2010
3:08 am

Always was over rated broke jumper, but not his fault the media hyped him up. I would have took money the as well but I knew he would’nt be a good pro. I was almost hung for this but I said the same for Kenny Anderson that he would be average at best and that was exactly what he was. The kid Kalin Lucas from MSU is the next one to be a bust. I wish they let me be a GM make awful personnel decisions and keep a great paying job. Most of these guys know nothing and that’s why you have teams that have been bad for 10, 15 years because of the owners not holding them accountable for these terrible draft picks year after year.

DeepDiver

January 28th, 2010
3:26 am

I’m top 5 dead or alive.

DeepDiver

January 28th, 2010
3:31 am

Despite your valid criticisms, Mark even you must admit that Critt does clean up well. That suit is clean. (No homo.)

BuLLdawg

January 28th, 2010
3:43 am

Javaris Crittenton is a thug, a college drop-out of Georgia tek, who yesterday was kicked out of basketball for the remainder of the year when David Stern announced that Javaris Crittenton plead Guilty to Gun Possession in the locker-room in a dispute with another player, just like Stephon Marbury. No different. Either one. Thugs. “Possession of Guns will not be tolerated in the workplace,” Stern announced. Crittenton admitted brandishing guns into the Wizards’ locker room — violating a provision added to the collective bargaining agreement in 2005 — after a dispute stemming from a card game on a team flight where the gambling debts are welched and so they draw down on each other like the Old West. Crittenton was injured and wasn’t playing anyway, but forfeits his pay starting today for the rest of the year. Mired in a horrible season, this Georgia tek thug was not going to help his teammates and fans with a play-off anyway, and now he loses all his pay. Javaris Crittenton is a Thug from Georgia tek, if there ever was a Thug from Georgia tek.

Paul Hewitt currently has Georgia tek on NCAA Probation following a ruling that the Academic Progress Rate of the Georgia tek men’s basketball Thugs is 914, the lowest in the nation. The NCAA has limited Paul Hewitt to only 11 Scholarships today January 28, 2010 for the Thug basketball he is promoting at Georgia tek. UGA men’s basketball enjoys a huge advantage Academically over the Thugs from Georgia tek on Paul Hewitt’s teams, with a much Higher NCAA Academic Progress Rate for UGA compared to Paul Hewitt as well. And by the way Paul Hewitt has a Losing Record by Several Games to UGA.

Stephon Marbury is a thug, a college drop-out of Georgia tek, who in 2007 defended Michael Vick in the infamous Newsweek interview where Marbury thug said “We don’t react the same when other animals are being killed for sport or for the sake of human pleasure.” It’s not wrong to kill dogs like Michael Vick did holding them up and cutting their throats when they didn’t perform well in dogfights, according to this Georgia tek Thug. In 2005, married with 2 children, Marbury had sex in the back of his pick-up truck on an outing to a strip club. Marbury has had numerous public fights with teammates and his coaches such as Larry Brown in 2006. The Knicks’ poor performance combined with Marbury’s public spats with his coach led to a severe decline in Marbury’s popularity, with Frank Isola and Michael O’Keefe of the New York Daily News stating that Marbury is “the most reviled athlete in New York.” In 2007, Isiah Thomas as his coach then removed Marbury was the line-up and Marbury just left the team and said in public that Marbury would blackmail Isiah Thomas for removing Marbury from the line-up and got into a fisticuffs over it on the plane flight. Marbury is a thug who was hated by all his teammates, hated by all his coaches, and who was wildly booed by the fans the loudest of all boos ever before being run out of basketball. Run out. And, now 2 weeks ago, it is announced that Marbury has signed with Shanxi, a Chinese basketball team. Marbury, a Thug, is not a team player as demonstrated in the 2004 Olympics when for the 1st time in history the U.S. Dream Team lost and lost and got only a bronze medal. Stephon Marbury is a Thug from Georgia tek, if there ever was a Thug from Georgia tek.

This is who Paul Hewitt brings to Georgia tek to get Beat by UGA, and why.

MaChelle Joseph, Georgia tek women’s basketball coach, refused to shake the hand of Andy Landers when The Lady Dawgs beat the crap out of Georgia tek’s women’s basketball team again and now have a 29-3 record against Georgia tek women. Poor sportsmanship is a theme at Georgia tek nowadays. She also has a worse NCAA Academic Progress Rate than UGA Lady Bulldogs, which is another Theme in Academics of your Athletics’ Department at Georgia tek.

Paul Johnson’s Recruiting Coordinator Giff Smith, on the same day yesterday, one week prior to Signing Date for the Nation’s Number 51 Football Recruiting Class, quits the position of Paul Johnson’s Recruiting Coordinator. How is that going to affect the Number 51 Recruiting Class in the Nation ? Uh, it cannot get any worse. Very disappointing recruiting class for Paul Johnson, again and for Giff Smith. No wonder he quit with the Number 51 Ranked Recruiting Class of just Thugs anyway. Thugs who Flunk Out. Thugs who cannot win a bowl game. Thugs who are 1-8 vs. Coach Richt. This is yet another serious black eye for Georgia tek and Paul Johnson. Obviously, Giff Smith is not needed in Buffalo in the next 6 days, so why burn Paul Johnson and Georgia tek like this, instead of waiting until after next Wednesday ?

Little Joey Hamilton, Georgia tek Thug.

Paul Johnson’s Director of Player Personnel was arrested for leaving the scene of an accident, was found a few blocks away with pot in his car, and was drunk. This was what little Joey Hamilton did with his 1st Paul Johnson Paycheck as Paul Johnson’s Director of Player Personnel. Then, the week of the Georgia tek Georgia football game Paul Johnson’s wife is interviewed and Paul Johnson’s wife states that she doesn’t even care about football.

Paul Johnson’s football team has a way worse NCAA Academic Progress Rate than UGA football players too.

HIT UGA FANS IN THE FACE after Losing Game CPJ said game not important.

Paul Johnson all week prior to the game, said that he Paul Johnson didn’t think that the UGA game was all that important to him personally. Then, after the game, Paul Johnson yells to reporters of the AJ-C that they should write to the Georgia tek fans having to deal with the aftermath of the 24-30 Loss to a team Paul Johnson didn’t care about beating and said was not an important game to him, that the Georgia tek fans should hit UGA fans in the face.

The 60th win by UGA over Georgia tek in football to 37 losses to Georgia tek with 5 ties. This sport too is not clean old fashioned hate by Georgia tek who have To Hell With Georgia in their Fight Song, which I still say is the cause of the really nasty Georgia tek antics in all sports against UGA. In football, you recall it all started in 1893 when Georgia tek hired 3 football players to play in the game against UGA. Players who were not students at Georgia tek. You named a dorm after one of them on the ramp at North Avenue. They were stoned in the train which then wrecked into the back of a freight train coming back to Atlanta. The photo in the 1893 AJ-C read RAMBLING WRECK RETURNS TO ATLANTA. Since that wrecked TRAIN, Georgia tek has now tried to pass off a 1930 automobile as the WRECKED TRAIN. You have NO HISTORY at Georgia tek except cheating and poor sportsmanship against UGA.

Campus Crime at Georgia tek is rampant. It is mostly your “student-athletes” yet you whine about the Thugs in the surrounding neighborhood.

Before your football games, your Athletics Department has to Warn Georgia tek fans not to throw whiskey bottles at the players of your opponents as they go through the tunnels to the Bobby Dodd stadium named for another college drop-out of the University of Tennessee at Knoxville who never not once beat Vince Dooley, but instead Lost every time and then quit.

Of course on a campus of 30 percent Asian males and only 29 percent women in the slums of a city of 6 million people, Georgia tek fans seriously are not safe and that is the reason why no one goes to any of your games Number 48 in the nation in Attendance while you play 6 teams who did not even go to a bowl game. That’s who Georgia tek can beat, while by direct comparison Georgia tek has not won a Major Bowl Game now since 1955, a span now of 56 years in a Row.

Javarius Crittenton apologized for what he called an “embarrassment”

A long string of continuous embarrassments for Georgia tek.

[...] Read more here: Former Jacket Crittenton needs to grab hold of his career [...]

Conyers Yellow Jacket

January 28th, 2010
4:30 am

In response to BuLLdawg`s letter, just a couple of BRIEF comments:
>The continious reference he made about Georgia tek Thugs is interesting. Did he not read
a recent item in the Athens Banner-Hearld which stated that the Athens/Clarke County and
UGA Campus police were overwhelmed by calls involving UGA players. This lead to a policy of telling callers to just get the number of their jersey and they would be picked up later.

>Enough said.

DeepDiver

January 28th, 2010
4:59 am

Quite an insightful piece Mr. BuLLdawg. I endorse the use of Random Capitals as a show of Emphasis.

BuLLdawg

January 28th, 2010
5:05 am

No sir, not on this day with the Javaris Crittenton welch on a bet drawing down on each other with guns in the locker-room and recruiting coordinator Giff Smith quitting because his recruiting class again is only the Number 44 recruiting class, can you DeepDiver (talk about random Capitals), sidetrack the story of this thread are once again, the Thugs of Georgia tek.

Who by the way, Lose to UGA anyway.

BuLLdawg

January 28th, 2010
5:08 am

Conyers YELLOWjackit,

Sir :

This blog is about Javaris Crittenton brandishing guns, drawing down on his teammate, over a welched bet and having to be removed from basketball for the remainder of the season after he plead Guilty 2 days ago now getting a 1 Year Probation. Georgia tek THUGS.

Reggie

January 28th, 2010
5:28 am

Bulldawg!

You need a get a real life!

BuLLdawg

January 28th, 2010
5:31 am

Reggie,

Sir :

I was not the 1 who drew down on a teammate in the locker-room over a welched bet brandishing guns and then plead Guilty getting a 1 Year Probation Sentence. That sir, was one of many Georgia tek THUGS and poor sportsmanship.

Paul Hewitt, after he Lost to UGA AGAIN this year 66-73 said that his team was the better team.

No his team is THUGS.

Has been THUGS.

Are THUGS.

Who Lose to UGA anyway.

Reggie

January 28th, 2010
5:31 am

Make that need 2!

bro

January 28th, 2010
5:40 am

Just another NBA thug. Pampared and overpaid for his ability all through school. A little more education in schools and less of the athlete studs and we would all be better off. College’s that really cared about their academics would not sign this the one and done athlete, because they are not students and only serve to take the place of good students that could really use the help. WHAT A WASTE OF TIME AND MONEY FOR NO APPARENT REASON.

BuLLdawg

January 28th, 2010
5:59 am

2 ?

Like Jarvaris Crittenton and Stephon Marbury THUGS of Paul Hewitt ?

There are 2 for you.

BuLLdawg

January 28th, 2010
6:01 am

Exactly bro.

Then, their fans of those colleges with these THUGS then come running in here trying to tell me that their team is a great team.

No they are not.

If they were they would NOT be on NCAA PROBATION as we speak for ACADEMICS.

Resign or Resign?

January 28th, 2010
6:01 am

Wow, bulldawg! Things must be slow at the drive-in window!

BuLLdawg

January 28th, 2010
6:06 am

NCAA Division I Academic Progress Rate

Penalty Summary

Institution: Georgia Institute of Technology

Date of Report: 05/01/2009

Page 4 of 4

This report is based on data submitted by the institution.

This report provides a summary of the teams identified at your institution that are subject to a contemporaneous penalty and/or historical penalty and their multiyear APR. The historical-penalty structure has a cumulative effect that continues to apply each year as a team progresses through the structure. Each year a team fails the historical-penalty review another stage of penalties will be added.

Sport

Multiyear APR Contemporaneous Penalty Historical Penalty -

Men’s Basketball 914 Limited to awarding 11 athletic scholarship renewals

http://web1.ncaa.org/app_data/apr2008/255_2008_apr.pdf

BuLLdawg

January 28th, 2010
6:11 am

So, why recruit these players ?

So that Mark Bradley and the entire AJ-C Sportswriting Staff can ATTEMPT to ignore and totally FAIL to REPORT that Georgia tek is on NCAA ACADEMIC PROBATION with PENALTIES of limit to only 11 scholarships in men’s basketball today, as we speak about this ?

So that every Georgia tek fan can ATTEMPT to ignore it as well ?

So that Georgia tek can ATTEMPT to ignore it ?

Hell, he can’t beat UGA even with these recruits for men’s “college” basketball.

drew

January 28th, 2010
6:12 am

BuLLdog: Something, something, something thug…something, something, something Tek…something, something, something, Tek sux… feel better now? Isn’t it great that UGA has NO THUGS in their program? BWAH!!

Too bad about that Tekthug stealing your girlfriend. Here’s hoping he tracks you down and opens a can of whoopass on you. I nominate your post in the “longest post by a complete tool” category.

Da Truth

January 28th, 2010
6:25 am

Hey, BuLLdog…how do you explain this?

In today’s news…

Former UGA offensive tackle Chris Terry, whose NFL career was cut short by his struggles with substance abuse, faces three felony charges after being pulled over by police in southern Indiana.

Terry, who resides in Athens, is charged with dealing and possessing cocaine, possessing a handgun without a permit, resisting arrest and driving under the influence, said Chuck Adams, a spokesman with the Clark County (Ind.) Sheriff’s Office. “At least three of those are felonies,” Adams said.

Details of the traffic stop were not made available by Clarksville Police. The Jacksonville native is being held without bond and will likely be arraigned Thursday, Adams said.

Terry, 34, played for the Bulldogs from 1995-98 and was a captain his senior season. Terry, drafted in the second round by the Carolina Panthers,was suspended for the first four games of the 2003 season for violating the NFL’s policies on substance abuse and personal conduct. The suspension stemmed from a 2002 incident in which Terry allegedly pushed his then-wife, NyQuell, into a wall during an argument.

Terry’s professional career ended with the Kansas City Chiefs, who cut him after he didn’t show up for team meetings. He was suspended by the NFL for at least a year prior to the 2008 season for violating the league’s substance abuse policy a second time.

A UGA thug? No way!! This guy went to the wrong school…as a bonafide thug, surely he should have gone to Tek, eh?

BuLLdawg

January 28th, 2010
6:50 am

I tried to comment on that but there was NO BLOG FOR IT like there is BLOG for

Georgia tek men’s basketball THUG Javaris Crittenton

THUG

And, Paul Hewitt’s men’s basketball program on PROBATION

for

ACADEMICS

Good try to IGNORE what THIS BLOG IS

Georgia tek fans

null

January 28th, 2010
6:50 am

Crittendon just moved to the top of my Celebrity Death Pool.

Angus

January 28th, 2010
6:51 am

What can you say? People do dumb sh*t – sometimes we get away with it, sometimes not.

I think Critt will land on an NBA team next year. But, I don’t ever see him being a significant contributor, and he will be gone in 2-3 years. Shame.

How many NBA players do you think are wiping their brow and saying “I’m glad I didn’t get caught” (now that they’ve stopped carrying)? I’m guessing about the same as the number of MLB steroid users that still keep an eye over their shoulder just waiting for someone to leak their positive test.

JustaThought

January 28th, 2010
6:52 am

Didn’t Marbury play for Cremins at GT????? I’m just saying…….you might want to consider the source.

blord

January 28th, 2010
6:58 am

bulldog do we forget jim harrick era and the raping of a girl by some ugay thugs in their dorm room. you can’t spell thug without ug.

Bobbi Dud

January 28th, 2010
7:22 am

You are right on Bulldawg! Nice stingers!

snapshot

January 28th, 2010
7:47 am

Bullmutt, look at you, the pot head calling the kettle black.

richbrave

January 28th, 2010
7:49 am

Wow, BRADLEY you do seem to bring out the worst in people. Some real lame-brained posts here. So this is how you make a living? Tough, tough. I’ll be back when the topics are all things BRAVES.

BTW I’ve been following J-CRIT since he signed in D.C. last year. The kid’s got game if he can just get on the court and develop it. Of course coming to HOTLANTA last summer against orders and breaking a bone in your foot is not the most intelligent move to exhibit on a basketball court.

Anyway, post an article about JOHNNY DAMON, and why he’s not the right guy for ATLANTA.

Mike Lum

January 28th, 2010
8:02 am

Back to Mark’s original subject…these athletes focus their entire lives on going pro. Most come from poor homes and look to the first NBA/NFL contract as the pot of gold. Just being in the league is the status they look for, that they are the equals of Kobe and LeBron. No thought as to how long their career will last. That’s why staying in school to become a better player is the furthest thing from their mind.

flagboy?

January 28th, 2010
8:10 am

These basketball stars are ruined way before they arrive at college. AAU “coaches” and contacts fill kids’ heads so full of crap.

Jeckyll Island

January 28th, 2010
8:11 am

30-24!!!
30-24!!!
30-24!!!
30-24!!!
8 out of 9!!!
8 out of 9!!!
8 out of 9!!!
8 out of 9!!!
73-66!!!
73-66!!!
73-66!!!
73-66!!!
Best score of the decade: 51-7 (2002 Dawgs over the jackettes)

Dawgs OWN Tech!!!!

Marvin Mangrum

January 28th, 2010
8:15 am

BuLLdog, sir, boy whatever you are, you are full of horse hockey!

#2 and always will be

January 28th, 2010
8:22 am

Half these clowns on here pretending like they’re such big fans of UGA never went there for one class, these are those rural Gawga folks that live vicariously through college by rooting for the bulldawgs on Saturdays in the fall….mad at the Ga Tech folks for being their bosses at their lowly jobs.

Morgan Burnett

January 28th, 2010
8:27 am

The Tech campus is riddled with crime – muggers, rapists, arsonists – you name it. Would you expect their athletes to be any different? None of this comes as a surprise, just as 30-24 was not a surprise to those in the know.

Inside BuLLDawg's Head

January 28th, 2010
8:28 am

Tell us a little about yourself, BuLLDawg. I’m guessing white, middle-aged, never married, maybe a 2-year stint in the military, and didn’t graduate from an institute of higher learning (and we’ll generously include UGA in this category). What about it, SIR ?

ignition

January 28th, 2010
8:30 am

These bulldawg fan has ruined a good blog..
It was a good topic too..
How is a Bulldawg fan gonna criticize Any school for players Committing crimes?? Geez
Mark could you delete this clown

Foothills football fan

January 28th, 2010
8:30 am

BuLLdawg-Man, get a life! But as someone posted earlier , NOBODY’S game seems to improve under Paul Blewit. Ish, Aminu, Lawal, to name a few. Other than another year of maturity, I’m not sure if Critt would have improved his game enough to change his draft status.

wreck'em

January 28th, 2010
8:34 am

wow….looks like Bulldawg is a huge fan . Man you are a huge freak, you are lost in space and have no life. find something worth while to do with your life.

ignition

January 28th, 2010
8:35 am

Paul Hewitt didn’t coach Marbury..
Wow, what a buffoon..
Doesn’t “Thug” seem like a code word for something else..

Road Scholar

January 28th, 2010
8:36 am

Crittenton= dumbass!

BuLLdawg: right behind Crittenton

mike

January 28th, 2010
8:37 am

Judging by some of the posts here, There is a segment of readers who are totally ate up about what some young athlete is doing or not doing. Can you imagine the atmosphere in their houses. That young man made a mistake like a lot of people do. He did not kill anyone. He did not embezzle peoples retirement funds. He did not molest any of the Senate pages. He is not an elected official trolling airport bathrooms. He is not a sect member marrying underage females. He did not put a rope around a guys neck and drag him from a pickup truck like they do in Texas. He did not give his wife divorce papers while she was in the hospital recovering from cancer. He did not beat down a female soldier because he hit her daughter with the door he was opening and then call her all kinds of racial slurs. At 22 years old, he brought an empty gun into a NBA locker room. Now everyone with no minimal talent thinks they have a right to dictate to him what life is all about. Hopefully the man learns from his mistakes and at 22 he can grow and move on. BTW where are all you gun nuts who clamor for the right to bare arms. Why is it when he looks like Crit and has a gun, he is a thug. When you show up at a tea baggers rally wearing a gun, you are considered a patriot. Why is that??

Tech by Design

January 28th, 2010
8:42 am

bulldawgsqueeze,

Apparently you haven’t heard about the recent AJC investigation into players’ academic performance. Out of 54 schools across the nation, Tech was the ONLY one whose players had an SAT score above the national average for all students.

Yes, Crittenton and Marbury may display thuggery, but that’s not representative of the school as a whole. At least our basketball team doesn’t get by on the Jim Harrick method of a test that asks about the number of halves in a basketball game.

Get a grip...

January 28th, 2010
8:48 am

Reality,
you need to get some fact…

RAPE & COVERUP, nice try at starting a rumor?

GRADE CHANGING, no grades were ever changed to keep players eligible. The formula that the administrator used to calculate the grade pt average was not correct and once it was discovered Tech self reported the incident. We are not proud of our “Flunk-gate” situation, it truely was an embarassment at Tech being the first time in history that the institue was on NCAA probation.

But a doggie throwing cheating and thug accusations at the Jackets, this is like OJ Simpson accusing Peyton Manning…

Reality = Uninformed and Dilusional

Jim C

January 28th, 2010
9:08 am

Mark, just another example of a kid that left too soon.

The Dude

January 28th, 2010
9:12 am

Crittenton may be an idiot (not really up for debate as it stands now), but he doesn’t hold a candle to the guy that wrote a novel (work of fiction) at 3:43am this morning. Bravo dude, maybe you can sell your book to Oprah or something.