Here’s what Tiger Woods needs to tell us: Absolutely nothing
I keep hearing and reading that Tiger Woods “needs to come clean.” (Here’s a boilerplate screed from the self-styled King of Outrage.) But you know what I say?
No he doesn’t.
He doesn’t need to say one thing more. He doesn’t have to talk to police, and he hasn’t. That’s his right under the law. And we the people have no overarching Need To Know on this issue. From the above expression of outrage: “The public deserves to hear exactly what happened in the wee hours of Thanksgiving night outside his mansion in Windermere, Fla.”
One question: Why?
It’s clear Mr. and Mrs. Woods had a discussion that didn’t end well. We can surmise that it had to do with the National Enquirer’s report of a Tiger dalliance with a New York nightclub hostess. We the people are not naive. But what exactly is Tiger supposed to say to us after driving his Cadillac into both a tree and a water hazard? (When run over by a vehicle, a fire hydrant qualifies.)
Should he paint himself into a Clinton-esque corner by wagging a finger and saying, “I did not have sex with that woman”? Should he risk being caught in a lie? Or should he admit to being an adulterer and thereby expose his already-exposed family to deeper public humiliation? Where’s the upside in that?
Tiger Woods is a public figure, but that’s not the same as being an elected official. He has asked no one to vote for him. Yes, he’s a serial endorser, but that’s more a matter between him and his sponsors. The corporations who pay him millions must decide if that money will continue to be well spent. (My guess is that they’ll shrug and say, “So what? He’s still Tiger Woods.”)
As hard as this is to believe in the Information Age, there’s such a thing as too much information. Alex Rodriguez held a mass media briefing last spring to address allegations of steroid use, and lo and behold he admitted using steroids. And you know what we in the media did? We ripped him for not telling us the whole truth, for being fuzzy on the details. We in the media can be a little silly sometimes.
And that seems an object lesson: Once you start talking about something seamy, you’re not given credit for facing the issue. You simply throw yourself and your family open to deeper scrutiny. Was the nightclub hostess the first Other Woman? If not, would Mr. Woods please name names, places and pertinent details? Were photos taken? If so, could you provide them? And was it indeed a 7-iron Mrs. Woods apparently brandished on the morning after Thanksgiving, and if so did she choose the right club?
I say again: We are not naive. We have cause to believe something is indeed amiss in the Woods marriage. But that is not our business. Nobody has been arrested. No charges have been filed. As much as we might hunger for the latest dollop of dope from TMZ, we have no inalienable right to satiation.
Tiger Woods is a public figure, yes. But even public figures have private lives. He should shut up — to his credit, that’s what he has done — and tend to his.
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240 comments Add your comment
Dawg Foot
November 30th, 2009
3:56 pm
Tiger Woods new updated video game includes a crazy arse beotch who chases you with a 7 iron. If you make her really mad she pulls out the driver. Your challenge is to run, jump in your car, and drive backwards without getting your arse beat.
SwimTrunk Dawg
November 30th, 2009
3:57 pm
Every man’s (white, negro, et al) dream is to marry a hot white blond. Tiger’s dream came true, he blew it.
jim
November 30th, 2009
3:59 pm
Mark, When someone makes a billion dollars and 90% of that was made from being a pitch man and public figure, the rules change. Fair or unfair, Tiger signed an “unofficial contract” with the public along time ago. You make your bed and then you lie in it. You cannot have the perks and monetary rewards that come with fame and then say, “time out”. Again, may not be fair but the other half of that “unofficial contract” states that he owes an explanation.
Blah Blah Blah
November 30th, 2009
4:03 pm
If it were you or I the police would be beating down our door for a statement to complete the police report, but since it’s (bigger than life) Eldrick, then all of the laws are thrown out the window. Frankly I think that she beat him with a golf club.
He backs out of his own tournament as well as he backs out of his driveway
Chuckie D
November 30th, 2009
4:04 pm
Mark,
Does Florida have an automatic “domestic violence” statute in regards to spousal abuse (scratching the significant other’s face, breaking out a vehicle’s window, etc)?
Just wondering~~~
Shane
November 30th, 2009
4:05 pm
WRONG WRONG WRONG
When you set yourself up as the all-american boy and are the worlds most popular spokesman using that image then sorry but people have a right to know if that is all BS or not.
Either way TMZ will payoff someone to tell the truth about what happens.
Tiger wants his cake and gets to eat it too. Sorry not this time.
Lumpkin Street Larry
November 30th, 2009
4:06 pm
Kind of an odd stance for a “journalist” to take, don’t you think??
getoverit!
November 30th, 2009
4:06 pm
Tiger owes us nothing! We are fans because we love him for his golfing abilities. He is neither father, son or husband to none of us. This is a private matter between him & his wife. As far as the investigation leave it to the authorities and stop speculating.
Go dig in your OWN back yard and find some dirt!~
Voice of Reason #1
November 30th, 2009
4:07 pm
Any golf game you can do, Tiger can do better.
BUT, IMHO, the wife heard about the alleged mistress. Was probably kicking Tiger’s tail (and face). He left out to escape the beatdown or fuss; crashed into things (OR either they staged the car crash to cover the injuries she inflicted on his face. BUT for him to not simply meet with the FHP is only making everything point to this being more than a simple “Oops, my bad for hitting the fire hydrant/tree.” He doesn’t want to be seen. She probably beat his face!
His statement points to more than being culpable for a simple driving mishap. I read it’s “totally my fault” [i.e., the argument happened (maybe cuz he's been creeping around)]; the wife–he defends her (trying to score points) and not point a finger at her for beating his ‘cabalasian’ derriere [cough, cough, cough]. And that this ‘will never happen again’ and ‘he’s only human, not perfect”‘…that’s not about simply hitting a tree. That’s a WHOLE lot more than that. I’ve said it before and will again…men cheat. Wives need to realize it. and it doesn’t matter who he is, what profession he’s in, or how noble he profeses to be. The biggest protestors are easy to fall…then try to hide. But his statement didn’t do him any good. people aren’t stupid. Not everyone anyway.
"Chef" Tim Dix
November 30th, 2009
4:07 pm
I’ve always wondered if Tiger even knew how to drive an automobile.
Focused, highly skilled, performers in any realm sometimes can’t perform the mundane becuase they never needed to.
But, like Eddie Murphy said, “Half!!!”
uga_b
November 30th, 2009
4:09 pm
I think Tiger needs to do the sensible thing and hire Steve Williams full time. That way, no pictures would have been taken and he wouldn’t forget to take his strokes after hitting a fire hydrant. Also, is ironic that golf clubs were being thrown at instead of by Tiger? Seriously, is this thing on?
I agree with you Mark, if Jay Mariotti says to do something, do the opposite. As long as he fulfills his obligation to the police and his insurance company, so be it.
Shane
November 30th, 2009
4:09 pm
Sure legally he is not required to tell us anything.
This is not a legal question. Its a question of this
Is the image that (yes the media) and his handlers put out all those years BS or not?
I love how celebrities love the limelight and attention when its all positive but when somebody reports the slightest negative they cry foul
Well cry me a river Tiger.
Observer
November 30th, 2009
4:09 pm
Dap & Jon – A search warrant DOES NOT compel a defendant to answer questions. The bottom line is that only two people know what really happened. As long as they don’t wish to talk about it, we will never know the truth – only speculation from others. Tiger’s private life is his. If he doesn’t want to talk, that’s his choice (and probably a smart one under the circumstances).
Dawg Foot
November 30th, 2009
4:10 pm
According to TMZ Tiger said his wife was “going ghetto” on him. Anyone know what that means?
ELVISINTHEHOUSE.
November 30th, 2009
4:10 pm
people sure are nosey and don’t have a life.even the columnist.
Please Hammer
November 30th, 2009
4:11 pm
Tiger and Bobby Cox’s wife need to talk to each other. Spousal abuse can only be understood from the inside.
master
November 30th, 2009
4:12 pm
we need to see nekid pics of his new girlfriend
Been There
November 30th, 2009
4:13 pm
HONEY… I’m home!
Observer
November 30th, 2009
4:13 pm
Now, the real question – whose wife will end up sporting the larger ring, Kobe’s or Tiger’s?
Shane
November 30th, 2009
4:14 pm
One other thing. If the police knocked on your door to find out about a wreck you had been in do you think you’d just be able to tell them
“Oh im not ready now come back tomorrow”
Give me a break.
jamerson
November 30th, 2009
4:14 pm
ZEUS,
you were still itchy in your daddy’s pants when uga last won a nat’l title. you were in high school the last time tech won. all uga is happy with is a 10 win season and a trip to SUGAR BOWL…”sugar is fallin’ outta the sky”
uga_b
November 30th, 2009
4:15 pm
And if he did cheat on his super-hot wife, I am glad he went the Jeff Gordon route and not the Bill Clinton/Steve Phillips route.
hmmmmmmmm
November 30th, 2009
4:19 pm
the bigger issue is what he was dring, A CADDY, doesn’t BUICK pay his Bills!!
Hmmmmmmmmm
RealDawg
November 30th, 2009
4:22 pm
Another crazy blonde woman. Hot or not. If she used a 6 iron my wife probably would have to go with the 4. Just sayin.
master
November 30th, 2009
4:22 pm
I still think we need to see nekid pics of his new girlfriend
midnite
November 30th, 2009
4:29 pm
Jon, AJ
Y’all need to stop watching all of those daytime TV court shows. LMAO while SMH.
Ken Myers
November 30th, 2009
4:29 pm
Tiger Woods has complied with the Florida law regarding his accident. He provided his license, registration, and proof of insurance card. HE doesn’t have to do anything else despite what the media and the general public thinks. How about this novel idea? Let the Windermere, FL police and the Florida state police do their investigations and let them release their results when finished. I guess to most of the media and the general public today, it would make too much sense because of the 24/7/365 cycle of the media.
AthensSG
November 30th, 2009
4:30 pm
hic, yeah, we are an unranked, lousy excuse for a team, but, uh 30-24!. Talk about laying an egg!!Just take 2 tbl spoons of Maalox and that bile in your throat will go down after a while.
PS: Did you get your invite to PJ’s “bigger fish to fry” fish fry?.
TU87
November 30th, 2009
4:31 pm
You’re right Mark, TW does not owe us an explanation. But he does owe the police if a crime was committed. It may seem “funny” that he was beat up by his wife, if that is even what happened, but domestic violence is still a crime. The police have every right to investigate. Yes and unfortunately for Tiger it probably will be leaked, but that doesn’t mean that the police are not right to investigate.
Mr. McMahon - King of WWF
November 30th, 2009
4:32 pm
No, no, my friend Brad, here is what I suggest, and what I will offer to produce…
Tiger appears on the platform of a carefully staged press conference, with soft organ music playing in the background….and has a “Jimmy Swaggart” moment…you know…
“God could not have given any man a more wonderful wife….”
(Tears up, chokes on the following words) “I have sinned against you, and I beg your forgiveness”
Wait a couple of days, then beautiful wife goes on The View or Oprah, or both, and “forgives and absolves” him.
Wait about a week, then WWE produces the “Renewal of the Wedding Vows” pay-per-view.
MONEY MONEY MONEY!!
Karl Childers
November 30th, 2009
4:33 pm
Cool Hand Luke went to jail for vandalizing a parking meter. I’m just saying.
Zeus
November 30th, 2009
4:36 pm
Great point Jamerson, that burns…
We haven’t won a national championship in nearly 30 years, ya’ll haven’t won one in nearly 20.
Let’s see, in the last 20 years UGA is 15-5 against Tech and has 2 SEC titles and 3 BCS appearances.
How many conference titles and BCS appearances does Tech have? Oh wait, zero, nooooooooo.
Dave
November 30th, 2009
4:38 pm
While I agree with Bradley’s article I wonder if he would have taken the same position if it were a white superstar. The press always gives minorities a pass.
andy
November 30th, 2009
4:41 pm
Somewhere in America, maybe one person just had a similar kind of mishap. do we care? No. So why should we about Tiger. It is his business. We have to draw the line about information and privacy. Draw it now.
Reid Adair
November 30th, 2009
4:42 pm
Wait a minute, Mark. You want to rip Mike Smith and the Falcons because they won’t tell you the status of Matt Ryan and Michael Turner on Sunday after the game, but then you support Tiger Woods not cooperating with a law enforcement investigation?
Come on.
Skip
November 30th, 2009
4:43 pm
Someone tell Phil Hartman that cops shouldn’t check for abuse from wives, they can’t do any real harm.
Nativebird
November 30th, 2009
4:44 pm
“…and I hope Tiger’s reading this so I can be a good little Mark Bradley and kiss his A#$% some more, so as not to Anger the Almighty Tiger and thus be granted an interview from He, the chosen one, the Savior. Only Tiger can endow us with Self Worth, because he is Great, and I am only mud.”
I Now Pronounce You "Barack & Larry."
November 30th, 2009
4:44 pm
RE: ““We” didn’t “make” Tiger Woods anything. Tiger Woods made himself. Get real.” – Mark Bradley @ 3:46 pm
Sorry, Mr. Bradley, but you are DEAD WRONG on this one.
Without golf fans and their disposable income to spend on golf tickets/passes, golfing supplies, sportswear and good & services provided by parent companies which sponsor the PGA and professional golfers, Tiger Woods is merely just a guy who can hit a little, white ball into a hole with the fewest number of strokes in comparison to his competitors. If no there is no money involved, he is just someone doing a “stupid human trick” for his own amusement.
There are countless rednecks who can spit into a can from 20 yards with pinpoint accuracy or win flatulence competitions, but they are not celebrities are adored by the public & media because no one cares to pay money to watch that garbage and large companies have no interest in wasting money to sponsor that on television since no one cares to watch it.
The public “makes” celebrities, and it is that same public (particularly the media) that makes a spectacle of tearing down from their apex. There is less entertainment value in bringing down an obscure person of whom no one has (yet) heard.
Gold is only worth a great deal of money, because we collectively say that it is. Otherwise, it is just a bunch of shiny, yet malleable, rocks.
If no one cared about golf and no $$$ involved was involved, no one would care about Tiger Woods.
DCW
November 30th, 2009
4:44 pm
Shameless pandering, Mark. Grow a pair.
Ken Stallings
November 30th, 2009
4:47 pm
At last I read a journalist who refuses to subscribe to the tedious refrain of presumed self-importance on what are private matters! I agree fully with your point of view.
There was an era when journalism kept a check on its pomposity by understanding that only when laws are broken, or elected officials are involved, does the public truly have a need to know (much less a right).
The way the media is acting justifies why the rich and famous now live in gated communities so they can escape the tiresome voyeurism of the media and their paid hacks known as paparazzi. We would all be better served if the media returned to its core justification — to keep watch on government and ignore the private intrigue of disempowered people!
And part of keeping watch on government is for the media to divorce itself from political advocacy and remember that it has no friends in government, but merely individuals who’s power earns them an unbiased and unblinking eye which the media is served the public mandate to provide!
AthensSG
November 30th, 2009
4:49 pm
Bill Clinton had a super-hot wife, uga_b?
touchstone
November 30th, 2009
4:49 pm
Actually, Mark does a great job here of spreading gossip and innuendo, the very thing he is bashing the “media” for doing. I didn’t know any of the details of the waitress and really wasn’t interested mark. I also didn’t know that the wreck resulted from the aftermath of a fight between his wife and Tiger. At least until I read your article. If it’s no “body’s business”, why are you spreading all this gossip. You point the finger at others, yet do the same crap yourself. You are peddling smut and dirty laundry, face it.
In my opinion, he would have been better served to have just given a brief “man, I dropped something as I was backing out and bam! I crashed into the hydrant, in lurching forward to disengaged from the hydrant I then hit a tree, not exactly proud moments for me and you can imagine why I am now going to let the matter rest and won’t speak to y’all about it again.”
When he decried all the false stories out there, he should have set the record straight and then stopped talking about it.
Chris Broe
November 30th, 2009
4:54 pm
Tiger’s going to be fine. He may have been drunk and that’s why he wouldn’t interview police.
Only a few more hours till the Pats/Saints. Blitz City!
Sonny Clusters
November 30th, 2009
4:58 pm
Charlie Chan could figure out what happened.
Clay
November 30th, 2009
4:58 pm
John Q, you right on the money, except I haven’t seen evidence of Tiger wanting fan’s adoration. He is absolutely the biggest a–hole on the tour. Disrespectful and arrogant towards his own fans. I’ve seen it first-hand 6 times after his rounds in tournaments. I saw his caddie slap a glove out of the hand of a kid trying to get Tiger to autograph it. I for one hope he loses endorsements…
Bob Horner had a sweet compact swing
November 30th, 2009
4:58 pm
I disagree…if she hit him with a golf club that is “simple battery”…a misdemeanor crime…the Police have to charge her…
If I give my wife a black eye…and she calls 911..I am going jail….
Clay
November 30th, 2009
5:01 pm
Bob, you mean you couldn’t decline police interviews?
Bob Horner had a sweet compact swing
November 30th, 2009
5:03 pm
I don’t think so Clay…..LOL they’d break down the door…
Benjamin
November 30th, 2009
5:03 pm
Tiger Woods made Tiger Woods, Barack and Larry. He has been honing his craft for literally as long as he can remember, and neither you nor I nor MB nor anyone else can take credit for it simply because we pay to see him play. He’s the greatest golfer in the universe — and it’s not even close — and he’s cultivated an image and a trademark that no one can touch.
Tiger made a mistake — most likely, though not for certain — and the sensationalist masses that love to tear people down will do what they will from this point forward. As far as Tiger owing anyone other than the Swede an apology or explanation, outside of the minor stuff with the police, it’s a silly proposition.
I hope he comes out the other side okay.
Benjamin
November 30th, 2009
5:06 pm
And who in the world is Mark “pandering” to for stating a simple opinion, Touchstone?
You people and your Bradley fetish… is it seriously worth it to come on here and type such drivel day in and day out in response to every column the man writes? It’s as if having the comments’ section gives y’all a sense of power or something…