Now you, too, can make decisions like Paul Johnson!

PJ tells Roddy Jones, "Just spin the dial." (Stephen Jensen, Tallahassee Democrat)

PJ tells Roddy Jones, "Just spin the dial." (Photo by Stephen Jensen, Tallahassee Democrat)

There comes a moment in everyone’s life when decision-making becomes just too difficult. You weigh the pros. You weigh the cons. And still you can’t make a choice because, to be frank, choosing is just too hard. Door No. 1? Door No. 2? Buy a consonant? Buy a vowel? Oh, Mr. Kotter, I’m so confused!

At such a moment, there’s only one recourse. We need to ask ourselves: What would PJ do?

(Something daring, surely. I mean, the man only went for it on fourth down five times against Wake Forest. And never mind that the first four didn’t work. The fifth turned out OK.)

As fate would have it, a shadowy figure who goes by “Fireball” has created a practical aid to bolder choice-making. He first posted it on The Hive, where it was discovered and forwarded to me by (cough, cough) a highly placed Georgia Tech source. And with the help of another clandestine operative — OK, Timothy Briley, a Tech fan who lives in Tallahassee and is VP of the Tallahassee/Thomasville GT club — I was able to discover Fireball’s true identity.

Fireball is  Sam Feuer. He graduated from Tech with a degree in chemical engineering. He lives in Atlanta. He played trombone in the Tech band from 1987 through 1992, which means he knows the Budweiser song by heart. His philosophy of life can be boiled down to two words: More cowbell. And he, in an act beneficial to all humanity, has created this aid to better living.

What would Paul Johnson do? Just spin the (figurative) dial below.

spinner

204 comments Add your comment

jacketfan

November 13th, 2009
9:38 am

Shambo

November 13th, 2009
9:41 am

Sam,
TOO COOL FOR SCHOOL !!! We’re not in GaileyLand any more, Toto.
Shambo

Mark Bradley

November 13th, 2009
9:42 am

Kudos, JacketFan. Being first entitles you to a free spin.

Brian

November 13th, 2009
9:46 am

The last time tech punted in the second half. What is October 3 at MSU, Alex? (That’s over a month ago for those counting at home so this dial must be working well)

Wreck85

November 13th, 2009
9:46 am

CPJ = The Freeze Meister

Bid Factory

November 13th, 2009
9:46 am

They left out fake field goal for a touchdown.

EEJacket

November 13th, 2009
9:48 am

U-no

November 13th, 2009
9:49 am

LOL! That is awesome, Mark! CPJ is a genius. I hope he doesn’t have to spin that thing too much on Saturday. Tech needs to stay in the hunt. I sense some big upsets this weekend.

Oh, and by the way, Auburn is not impressed with the puppies fashion statement, take a W in Athens.

Vick #7

November 13th, 2009
9:50 am

Paul Johnson’s offense will never win the big one – which sums up Tech grads. A bunch of followers and not leaders.

leland

November 13th, 2009
9:51 am

Dear Mr. MB–years ago, after hours of research in Consumers Research and other equally esteemed sources, I purchased a Renault Dauphine. I haven’t made a decision since, and don’t plan to. Thanks anyway. Your pal, Leland

Sonny Clusters

November 13th, 2009
9:53 am

Clusters was never one to be timid about going for it. Paul Johnson reminds us a lot of Coach as far as going for it. Coach knew Stinky Wintes could throw a block and me or Jeff could get through the hole and make the yards. Going fot it has always been a Clusters trait. We was going for it in high school and at the Dairy Queen and we still are going for it because that’s what makes state championships happen. Has Paul Johnson ever had a state championship?

happily reHired

November 13th, 2009
9:54 am

athensdawg

November 13th, 2009
9:54 am

its obvious that the difference between GT and UGA can be found in the chest (one coach has heart, one doesn’t) and in the groin (one coach has em, one doesn’t.) And it shows this year

but that’s ok. Winning isn’t everything….we at UGA are turning out the most pristine, lilly white, well behaved boys from our football program….and, let’s not forget that we won two SEC championships at the start of the decade, and have a “great” winning percentage compared to a lot of other coaches and programs.

AlabamaBuzzer

November 13th, 2009
9:55 am

Don’t think CPJ will let this team look past the Dookies. They have the type short pass offense that gives us fits. Womack better have his “A” game ready this week and not have to wait til halftime to make adjustments as he has all year long up to now. GO JACKETS!!!

Mark Bradley

November 13th, 2009
9:55 am

Leland, I myself am a man who purchased not one, not two, but three Betamaxes. The first for $799 in 1979.

Mark Bradley

November 13th, 2009
9:57 am

Last time Tech punted in the second half, Brian, was indeed against Mississippi State on Oct. 3. With 9:21 remaining in the game. So that’s 10 second-half quarters — plus the overtime against Wake, not that anybody punts in OT — without one.

SECFactCheck.com

November 13th, 2009
9:57 am

Vick #7 . . Paul Johnnson has won several “big ones”. Check out his resume.

How many “followers” were willing to sign-up with Paul Johnson. Feels like GA Tech might be helping to move the NCAA coaching pendulum. In case you didn’t catch the scores Saturday, Navy beat Notre Dame for the second time in 3 tries . . . LEADING THE WAY, CPJ!

reebok

November 13th, 2009
9:57 am

ok, now that’s funny!

Sonny Clusters

November 13th, 2009
9:57 am

The Wintes drove a Renault Dauphine and Mrs. Wintes sometimes drove car pool but most of us would walk that day. Being cooped up in a Dauphine with Stinky Wintes and his Mom was never a pleasant thing. That’s a lot like blogging sometimes. Blogging can be Cadillac or blogging can be Renault. It is a good thing Mark runs a Cadillac blog though the AJC may have a Renault budget going right about now with the move and all upcoming. We was wondering if the blog is going to get narrower like the paper?

HarryR

November 13th, 2009
9:58 am

Too funny!

Mark – here is a web site with some great charts etc. Also check out the Josh Nesbitt emotion chart.

THWG

the real Old Gold

November 13th, 2009
9:59 am

Gravy Train

November 13th, 2009
9:59 am

Tech math geniuses should now the low probabilities for success when gambling…the vast majority of the time you are lucky to break even.

It will be interesting to see what happens to all of the smug cockiness when reality crashes down again.

Nativebird

November 13th, 2009
9:59 am

Gee minitly Bradley, what does this make, the 10th blog in about 2 weeks about how far you can get your nose up Paul Johnsons rear?
What, did he ban you from the press room for critizing his new puke green/yellow uniforms last year?
Okay okay, he’s a decent coach (just listen to him tell you so) but let’s not fit him for the Hall of Fame coat quite yet shall we? Year TWO in real (Navy and Southern don’t count) college football with no titles yet. Let him actually accomplish what you have already bestowed upon him, shall we.

Theron Sapp

November 13th, 2009
9:59 am

Shouldn’t Tech people have been able to figure out how to make an online spinner that actually spins?

U-no

November 13th, 2009
10:00 am

A typical Tech win is one that things look difficult in the first half, you think, “come on guys, let’s get with it.” Then CPJ works his magic and the second half explosion takes place. The defense has made things too interesting at times in the second half, but ball control by our offense has restored order to the universe.

Duke will look good for a half, and then melt away in the second half. Tech wins this one… BIG!

HarryR

November 13th, 2009
10:00 am

happy days are here again

November 13th, 2009
10:02 am

love it! Sometimes you have to look ahead and make decisions ..I just bought tix to the ACC game, by the way the Coastal side is the WEST STANDS and you can purchase on Ticketmaster. It was a gutsy call but Clemson plays at noon as well and I imagine there are a few orders going to be taking place on Saturday. I’m heading to Durham to support the team guess I will also see Clempson along the way to Raleigh.. Go NC State but most of all Go get ‘em Jackets, GO FOR IT!

TechKen

November 13th, 2009
10:02 am

CPJ is the new TECH man, great hire by D Rad

This man has the biggest set of kahunas of any coach if BCS!!!

For the uniformed I bring you the urban dictionary definition: kahunas -Australian slang for testicles. Probably came about as a confusion between spanish cohones and hawaiian kahuna.

Mark Bradley

November 13th, 2009
10:05 am

The only thing that will get thinner on here, Sonny, is the thought process of the writer. Which was thin to begin with.

shame on Vick

November 13th, 2009
10:06 am

and shame on Vick#7 which reminds me we haven’t heard out of Marcus for awhile, anybody know which prison he is in now? Yeah that Beamerball and Hokienation is crumbling, but look at the foundation, what did anyone expect?

The Walrus

November 13th, 2009
10:08 am

I’ve followed Paul Johnson ever since his days at GSU. I worked at GSU during his head coaching tenure and had the chance to meet him a couple of times. Great guy who runs a clean program, one in which you know the kids are getting steered correctly. Even though I’m a UGA fan first and foremost, it is FANTASTIC to see PJ get this level of success. I hope he can keep it going.

Who's the fool Vick7?

November 13th, 2009
10:14 am

Vick blew his multi-year, multi-million dollar contract for a prison sentence in Levenworth. Now he is limited to a handful of minutes in the Eagles gameplan. Why do you still follow that WINNER?

Wreck

November 13th, 2009
10:16 am

Gravy train- what reality is that? The reality that things will only get better? It just kills you think about this.

It must comfort you greatly to think that all of this is flash-in-the-pan success. I hope it gets you by now. Because eventuially reality will come crashing down on you…I bet your brain can’t even function with the thought of Tech winning an MNC! Delusions of superiority….

GTdad

November 13th, 2009
10:16 am

“Yea, he’s bad, bad, CPJ,
The baddest man in the A-C-C,
Badder than ole King Kong,
Meaner than those junkyard dawgs!!!!”

raoul75

November 13th, 2009
10:19 am

Yeah Sonny, he won one last year in Athens, it was in all the papers. Sorry you missed it, but keep focused, he’s going to win another one this year on the Flats.

Pat Dye

November 13th, 2009
10:19 am

Reminds me of the time I went for the TIE against Syracuse in the Sugar Bowl.
I was afraid to lose.
I was just not “man enough”.

leland

November 13th, 2009
10:19 am

Dear Mr. MB–it looks like you and Sonny know what a Dauphine was. For you bloggers too little to know, you can go to Time magazine’s site, to the Best & Worst lists and thence to Worst Cars and there be introduced to the beauty. For me, I don’t look at it anymore; it made me cry last time. Your pal, Leland

GT

November 13th, 2009
10:20 am

Gravy Train- Yeah we might do something like waste all our time posting bitter comments on articles about our rivals.

Eric

November 13th, 2009
10:23 am

Fireball is his real name. Sam is just a pseudonym used by his family. I roomed with him for a quarter at Tech. It took me halfway through the quarter to stop saying “Who?” when his family called and asked to speak to Sam.
And he definitely bleeds White and Gold. He thinks sitting down during a football game is for sissies.

7

November 13th, 2009
10:26 am

Wish GT had a Basketball Coach like Johnson. Go Yellow Jackets.

Polish Sausage

November 13th, 2009
10:27 am

Hey gravy train, it aint gambling when you know you’re going to win.

GTSurgery

November 13th, 2009
10:30 am

Funny Vick #7, since Beamer and VT have won how many MNCs? (insert crickets) Or when it comes to winning a big one, how about being #4 in the country and losing to a CPJ team in your biggest game of the year and letting them stay in your head so long that you lose the next week too. Yeah, you’re right, beamerball is awesome.

G-Man

November 13th, 2009
10:30 am

Great article, MB. Kudos to Feurer on this one (even if he was in the band). The only downside I see (am and waiting on a dog fan to raise is an offshoot of their common argument) – you’ll never recruit a good punter; who would want to play in that scheme. Funny thing is it may be a good point. We’ll see, though. If PJ had a good punter (like the one for UGA), maybe that would slant his thinking toward more kicks. But not likely …

Dawg Fan 74

November 13th, 2009
10:35 am

Johnson is a great coach…but UGA will rule.

GT

November 13th, 2009
10:36 am

Just like last year Dawg Fan 74?

bb

November 13th, 2009
10:41 am

FWIW, I was not particularly surprised when GT went for it last Saturday. I believe that when CPJ makes calls like that it energizes his team (it doesn’t matter if the call succeeds or not).

Last year in the Miami game, CPJ attemped an on-side kick in the first half while the game was still close (within a TD if I remember right). It seemed like an especially bad call when Miami recovered, but that call did something to our team and they exploded to win that game and the next in impressive fashion.

CPJ is not afraid to fail and his team plays that way too. Players (and coaches) are going to make mistakes, but CPJ has taught our players that a mistake is not the end of the world. Therefore, our players don’t play scared to make a mistake. Football is suppose to be fun. That is CPJ’s genius. That is why he is a winner.

SadDawg

November 13th, 2009
10:42 am

Mark is it true that PF also had one of those for making his impending decision regarding the Irish?

SadDawg

November 13th, 2009
10:43 am

Just kiddin Techies, I hope he stays put. He’s great for the state of Georgia

roadwreck

November 13th, 2009
10:43 am

You never have to buy a consonant. The choices are buy a vowel, spin again or solve the puzzle.

Iceman

November 13th, 2009
10:43 am

The Flats…who knew Tech’s aluminum stadium even had a nickname? Weird.