Now you, too, can make decisions like Paul Johnson!
PJ tells Roddy Jones, "Just spin the dial." (Photo by Stephen Jensen, Tallahassee Democrat)
There comes a moment in everyone’s life when decision-making becomes just too difficult. You weigh the pros. You weigh the cons. And still you can’t make a choice because, to be frank, choosing is just too hard. Door No. 1? Door No. 2? Buy a consonant? Buy a vowel? Oh, Mr. Kotter, I’m so confused!
At such a moment, there’s only one recourse. We need to ask ourselves: What would PJ do?
(Something daring, surely. I mean, the man only went for it on fourth down five times against Wake Forest. And never mind that the first four didn’t work. The fifth turned out OK.)
As fate would have it, a shadowy figure who goes by “Fireball” has created a practical aid to bolder choice-making. He first posted it on The Hive, where it was discovered and forwarded to me by (cough, cough) a highly placed Georgia Tech source. And with the help of another clandestine operative — OK, Timothy Briley, a Tech fan who lives in Tallahassee and is VP of the Tallahassee/Thomasville GT club — I was able to discover Fireball’s true identity.
Fireball is Sam Feuer. He graduated from Tech with a degree in chemical engineering. He lives in Atlanta. He played trombone in the Tech band from 1987 through 1992, which means he knows the Budweiser song by heart. His philosophy of life can be boiled down to two words: More cowbell. And he, in an act beneficial to all humanity, has created this aid to better living.
What would Paul Johnson do? Just spin the (figurative) dial below.
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204 comments Add your comment
jacketfan
November 13th, 2009
9:38 am
first!
Shambo
November 13th, 2009
9:41 am
Sam,
TOO COOL FOR SCHOOL !!! We’re not in GaileyLand any more, Toto.
Shambo
Mark Bradley
November 13th, 2009
9:42 am
Kudos, JacketFan. Being first entitles you to a free spin.
Brian
November 13th, 2009
9:46 am
The last time tech punted in the second half. What is October 3 at MSU, Alex? (That’s over a month ago for those counting at home so this dial must be working well)
Wreck85
November 13th, 2009
9:46 am
CPJ = The Freeze Meister
Bid Factory
November 13th, 2009
9:46 am
They left out fake field goal for a touchdown.
EEJacket
November 13th, 2009
9:48 am
GOFERIT
U-no
November 13th, 2009
9:49 am
LOL! That is awesome, Mark! CPJ is a genius. I hope he doesn’t have to spin that thing too much on Saturday. Tech needs to stay in the hunt. I sense some big upsets this weekend.
Oh, and by the way, Auburn is not impressed with the puppies fashion statement, take a W in Athens.
Vick #7
November 13th, 2009
9:50 am
Paul Johnson’s offense will never win the big one – which sums up Tech grads. A bunch of followers and not leaders.
leland
November 13th, 2009
9:51 am
Dear Mr. MB–years ago, after hours of research in Consumers Research and other equally esteemed sources, I purchased a Renault Dauphine. I haven’t made a decision since, and don’t plan to. Thanks anyway. Your pal, Leland
Sonny Clusters
November 13th, 2009
9:53 am
Clusters was never one to be timid about going for it. Paul Johnson reminds us a lot of Coach as far as going for it. Coach knew Stinky Wintes could throw a block and me or Jeff could get through the hole and make the yards. Going fot it has always been a Clusters trait. We was going for it in high school and at the Dairy Queen and we still are going for it because that’s what makes state championships happen. Has Paul Johnson ever had a state championship?
happily reHired
November 13th, 2009
9:54 am
too funny.
athensdawg
November 13th, 2009
9:54 am
its obvious that the difference between GT and UGA can be found in the chest (one coach has heart, one doesn’t) and in the groin (one coach has em, one doesn’t.) And it shows this year
but that’s ok. Winning isn’t everything….we at UGA are turning out the most pristine, lilly white, well behaved boys from our football program….and, let’s not forget that we won two SEC championships at the start of the decade, and have a “great” winning percentage compared to a lot of other coaches and programs.
AlabamaBuzzer
November 13th, 2009
9:55 am
Don’t think CPJ will let this team look past the Dookies. They have the type short pass offense that gives us fits. Womack better have his “A” game ready this week and not have to wait til halftime to make adjustments as he has all year long up to now. GO JACKETS!!!
Mark Bradley
November 13th, 2009
9:55 am
Leland, I myself am a man who purchased not one, not two, but three Betamaxes. The first for $799 in 1979.
Mark Bradley
November 13th, 2009
9:57 am
Last time Tech punted in the second half, Brian, was indeed against Mississippi State on Oct. 3. With 9:21 remaining in the game. So that’s 10 second-half quarters — plus the overtime against Wake, not that anybody punts in OT — without one.
SECFactCheck.com
November 13th, 2009
9:57 am
Vick #7 . . Paul Johnnson has won several “big ones”. Check out his resume.
How many “followers” were willing to sign-up with Paul Johnson. Feels like GA Tech might be helping to move the NCAA coaching pendulum. In case you didn’t catch the scores Saturday, Navy beat Notre Dame for the second time in 3 tries . . . LEADING THE WAY, CPJ!
reebok
November 13th, 2009
9:57 am
ok, now that’s funny!
Sonny Clusters
November 13th, 2009
9:57 am
The Wintes drove a Renault Dauphine and Mrs. Wintes sometimes drove car pool but most of us would walk that day. Being cooped up in a Dauphine with Stinky Wintes and his Mom was never a pleasant thing. That’s a lot like blogging sometimes. Blogging can be Cadillac or blogging can be Renault. It is a good thing Mark runs a Cadillac blog though the AJC may have a Renault budget going right about now with the move and all upcoming. We was wondering if the blog is going to get narrower like the paper?
HarryR
November 13th, 2009
9:58 am
Too funny!
Mark – here is a web site with some great charts etc. Also check out the Josh Nesbitt emotion chart.
THWG
the real Old Gold
November 13th, 2009
9:59 am
http://whatwouldpauljohnsondo.appspot.com/
Gravy Train
November 13th, 2009
9:59 am
Tech math geniuses should now the low probabilities for success when gambling…the vast majority of the time you are lucky to break even.
It will be interesting to see what happens to all of the smug cockiness when reality crashes down again.
Nativebird
November 13th, 2009
9:59 am
Gee minitly Bradley, what does this make, the 10th blog in about 2 weeks about how far you can get your nose up Paul Johnsons rear?
What, did he ban you from the press room for critizing his new puke green/yellow uniforms last year?
Okay okay, he’s a decent coach (just listen to him tell you so) but let’s not fit him for the Hall of Fame coat quite yet shall we? Year TWO in real (Navy and Southern don’t count) college football with no titles yet. Let him actually accomplish what you have already bestowed upon him, shall we.
Theron Sapp
November 13th, 2009
9:59 am
Shouldn’t Tech people have been able to figure out how to make an online spinner that actually spins?
U-no
November 13th, 2009
10:00 am
A typical Tech win is one that things look difficult in the first half, you think, “come on guys, let’s get with it.” Then CPJ works his magic and the second half explosion takes place. The defense has made things too interesting at times in the second half, but ball control by our offense has restored order to the universe.
Duke will look good for a half, and then melt away in the second half. Tech wins this one… BIG!
HarryR
November 13th, 2009
10:00 am
Forgot the link.
http://mashonthegas.blogspot.com/
happy days are here again
November 13th, 2009
10:02 am
love it! Sometimes you have to look ahead and make decisions ..I just bought tix to the ACC game, by the way the Coastal side is the WEST STANDS and you can purchase on Ticketmaster. It was a gutsy call but Clemson plays at noon as well and I imagine there are a few orders going to be taking place on Saturday. I’m heading to Durham to support the team guess I will also see Clempson along the way to Raleigh.. Go NC State but most of all Go get ‘em Jackets, GO FOR IT!
TechKen
November 13th, 2009
10:02 am
CPJ is the new TECH man, great hire by D Rad
This man has the biggest set of kahunas of any coach if BCS!!!
For the uniformed I bring you the urban dictionary definition: kahunas -Australian slang for testicles. Probably came about as a confusion between spanish cohones and hawaiian kahuna.
Mark Bradley
November 13th, 2009
10:05 am
The only thing that will get thinner on here, Sonny, is the thought process of the writer. Which was thin to begin with.
shame on Vick
November 13th, 2009
10:06 am
and shame on Vick#7 which reminds me we haven’t heard out of Marcus for awhile, anybody know which prison he is in now? Yeah that Beamerball and Hokienation is crumbling, but look at the foundation, what did anyone expect?
The Walrus
November 13th, 2009
10:08 am
I’ve followed Paul Johnson ever since his days at GSU. I worked at GSU during his head coaching tenure and had the chance to meet him a couple of times. Great guy who runs a clean program, one in which you know the kids are getting steered correctly. Even though I’m a UGA fan first and foremost, it is FANTASTIC to see PJ get this level of success. I hope he can keep it going.
Who's the fool Vick7?
November 13th, 2009
10:14 am
Vick blew his multi-year, multi-million dollar contract for a prison sentence in Levenworth. Now he is limited to a handful of minutes in the Eagles gameplan. Why do you still follow that WINNER?
Wreck
November 13th, 2009
10:16 am
Gravy train- what reality is that? The reality that things will only get better? It just kills you think about this.
It must comfort you greatly to think that all of this is flash-in-the-pan success. I hope it gets you by now. Because eventuially reality will come crashing down on you…I bet your brain can’t even function with the thought of Tech winning an MNC! Delusions of superiority….
GTdad
November 13th, 2009
10:16 am
“Yea, he’s bad, bad, CPJ,
The baddest man in the A-C-C,
Badder than ole King Kong,
Meaner than those junkyard dawgs!!!!”
raoul75
November 13th, 2009
10:19 am
Yeah Sonny, he won one last year in Athens, it was in all the papers. Sorry you missed it, but keep focused, he’s going to win another one this year on the Flats.
Pat Dye
November 13th, 2009
10:19 am
Reminds me of the time I went for the TIE against Syracuse in the Sugar Bowl.
I was afraid to lose.
I was just not “man enough”.
leland
November 13th, 2009
10:19 am
Dear Mr. MB–it looks like you and Sonny know what a Dauphine was. For you bloggers too little to know, you can go to Time magazine’s site, to the Best & Worst lists and thence to Worst Cars and there be introduced to the beauty. For me, I don’t look at it anymore; it made me cry last time. Your pal, Leland
GT
November 13th, 2009
10:20 am
Gravy Train- Yeah we might do something like waste all our time posting bitter comments on articles about our rivals.
Eric
November 13th, 2009
10:23 am
Fireball is his real name. Sam is just a pseudonym used by his family. I roomed with him for a quarter at Tech. It took me halfway through the quarter to stop saying “Who?” when his family called and asked to speak to Sam.
And he definitely bleeds White and Gold. He thinks sitting down during a football game is for sissies.
7
November 13th, 2009
10:26 am
Wish GT had a Basketball Coach like Johnson. Go Yellow Jackets.
Polish Sausage
November 13th, 2009
10:27 am
Hey gravy train, it aint gambling when you know you’re going to win.
GTSurgery
November 13th, 2009
10:30 am
Funny Vick #7, since Beamer and VT have won how many MNCs? (insert crickets) Or when it comes to winning a big one, how about being #4 in the country and losing to a CPJ team in your biggest game of the year and letting them stay in your head so long that you lose the next week too. Yeah, you’re right, beamerball is awesome.
G-Man
November 13th, 2009
10:30 am
Great article, MB. Kudos to Feurer on this one (even if he was in the band). The only downside I see (am and waiting on a dog fan to raise is an offshoot of their common argument) – you’ll never recruit a good punter; who would want to play in that scheme. Funny thing is it may be a good point. We’ll see, though. If PJ had a good punter (like the one for UGA), maybe that would slant his thinking toward more kicks. But not likely …
Dawg Fan 74
November 13th, 2009
10:35 am
Johnson is a great coach…but UGA will rule.
GT
November 13th, 2009
10:36 am
Just like last year Dawg Fan 74?
bb
November 13th, 2009
10:41 am
FWIW, I was not particularly surprised when GT went for it last Saturday. I believe that when CPJ makes calls like that it energizes his team (it doesn’t matter if the call succeeds or not).
Last year in the Miami game, CPJ attemped an on-side kick in the first half while the game was still close (within a TD if I remember right). It seemed like an especially bad call when Miami recovered, but that call did something to our team and they exploded to win that game and the next in impressive fashion.
CPJ is not afraid to fail and his team plays that way too. Players (and coaches) are going to make mistakes, but CPJ has taught our players that a mistake is not the end of the world. Therefore, our players don’t play scared to make a mistake. Football is suppose to be fun. That is CPJ’s genius. That is why he is a winner.
SadDawg
November 13th, 2009
10:42 am
Mark is it true that PF also had one of those for making his impending decision regarding the Irish?
SadDawg
November 13th, 2009
10:43 am
Just kiddin Techies, I hope he stays put. He’s great for the state of Georgia
roadwreck
November 13th, 2009
10:43 am
You never have to buy a consonant. The choices are buy a vowel, spin again or solve the puzzle.
Iceman
November 13th, 2009
10:43 am
The Flats…who knew Tech’s aluminum stadium even had a nickname? Weird.
SadDawg
November 13th, 2009
10:44 am
PJ not PF
SadDawg
November 13th, 2009
10:45 am
PJ not PF!
DBH
November 13th, 2009
10:49 am
ROFL!!!
SOUTH GA DAWG FAN
November 13th, 2009
10:50 am
can’t stand tech. now that I have that out of the way CPJ is one of the best I have seen at making adjustments during the game he is a wizard and I have no problem giving him his due. A word of caution A lot of coaches say they will stay but the rich tech boosters better get off the checkbook because he says he wants to stay but YOU ALL KNOW MONEY CAN CHANGE MINDS i hope he stays it will mean a lot more when My DAWGS beat tech again in a couple of years.
GO DAWGS !!!!!!!!!!
BravesFan79
November 13th, 2009
10:51 am
LOL… love the decision spinner
DMatos
November 13th, 2009
10:52 am
Oh no Fireball, people know your secret identity….
mike
November 13th, 2009
10:53 am
Thanks Mark. It’s this kind of stuff that makes college football fun.
Mark Bradley
November 13th, 2009
10:56 am
Paul Johnson’s not going to Notre Dame. Urban Meyer’s going to Notre Dame. Wasn’t that what I read a while back?
Actually, nobody’s going to Notre Dame.
G-Man
November 13th, 2009
11:07 am
Actually I expect that Harbaugh or Kelly will go there. If you’re saying that ND isn’t the plum job it used to be, I agree with you Mark. Though SOUTH GA DAWG FAN is right, money does a lot of talking and there is still a lot of it at ND. Tech will do what it takes to keeping PJ rooted in Atlanta; the “buzz” he has created is almost unbelievable – at least to me, given the velocity (and I think continuing acceleration) that is taking place will football on the Flats. At some point (hopefully not this year) Tech will lose another game. Hey it happened in the Peach Bowl (or whatever it’s now called) and at UM. What occurred afterwards – back up on the horse, or in the saddle or whatever cliche you want to apply, right? Duke will play hard, so will UGA. Good. So will we. Go Jackets!
Mark Bradley
November 13th, 2009
11:10 am
As PJ said before the Wake Forest game: Don’t put the horse before the cart.
m
November 13th, 2009
11:11 am
Just remember that the only reason that all of this joy at TECH is possible is thanks to GOD and GREYHOUND chan gomer gailey is gone forever. That is the reason that things are now great at Tech.
But Tech could have had Paul Johnson is 2002…Think about it. Any Tech fan that ever supported or defended gomer in any way sucks just as bad as gomer does and you should be ashamed of yourselves…especially all the idiots on the Hive that propped gomer up.
CPJ not going to ND?!?!
November 13th, 2009
11:12 am
Mark Bradley! How dare you crush my hopes and dreams that CPJ leave the Flats!!! How will I antagonize those Jackets now?!?! And what’s this? Urban ain’t leaving anytime soon either?! Oh woe is me and my dawgs
The Truth
November 13th, 2009
11:14 am
Everyone knows that GA Tech Lies and Cheats. Paul Johnson is simply taking it to a higher level using steroids with “key” players. I am embarrassed that GA Tech is in my state.
Steven
November 13th, 2009
11:17 am
GT #1. Best football team right now. You’ll see.
Atlanta Jacket
November 13th, 2009
11:19 am
Sounds like The Truth is upset about possibly finishing at 5-7. Ole Aubbie is going to take the hiney sniffers down.
Jon
November 13th, 2009
11:21 am
FYI Mark, I’d say more than 50% of your audience isn’t going to get Kotter references.
Sonny Clusters
November 13th, 2009
11:24 am
Putting the “horse before the cart” was a trick. CPJ was seeing who was paying attention. Tricky coaches can do stuff like that and measure they opponent. Sometimes they opponents are wearing designer sunglasses and coaches can’t see they eyes to know what they was thinking. Using tricks like “horse before the cart” can help ‘em sum up somebody before they get on the field with ‘em. Some coaches are slick.
GTOption
November 13th, 2009
11:25 am
Petrino should go to ND!
Mark Bradley
November 13th, 2009
11:28 am
My friend Jack Brammer — of Maysville, Ky., and now of the Lexington Herald-Leader — was once an assistant coach on a baseball team. The head coach made a little speech. He said: “I’ve got two words for you — go get ‘em.”
SOUTH GA DAWG FAN
November 13th, 2009
11:29 am
I had to break topic , but i have already bragged on CPJ as much as it hurt me to do so , but does anyone have an up to date injury report on jerious norwood I also like them falcons and I can’t find anything but last weeks reports.
Doug the Jacket
November 13th, 2009
11:36 am
Ramblin, Gambling, hell of a coach. THE COACH has returned to The Flats. GT is back! Whine pups.
TML
November 13th, 2009
11:36 am
Paul “Goferit” Johnson. Nice nickname. Though for what he’s done for us so far, I like “St. Paul” just as good. I was about to lose it when he decided to ‘goferit’…then I remembered who I was about to get mad at and thought, ‘well, that figures’…kinda what I said after Josh got the 1st down too
. It is a wonderful time to be a Tech fan!
Looking for “the perfect option” for the Tech fan on your Christmas list? StinGTees’ “Toe Meets Leather” is now available at your local The Fan’s Wear store (Cumberland, Peachtree Center, Northlake, & Stoncrest) as well as at http://www.stinGTees.com!
Alabama Jack
November 13th, 2009
11:38 am
BEAT DUKE
Talk about everything else Sunday
BTW, War Damn Eagle, this weekend only.
Ramblinwreck83
November 13th, 2009
11:38 am
Nativebird
I take it that your a UGA fan and i’m sure you think CMR is the greatest ever. Other than 2 SEC championships what has he ever done. Obviously he’s starting to bring down the program with all his buddies as coaches and not growing a pair. Nobody’s putting him into the hall of fame, but give him some time to prove how great of a coach he is. Just except the fact that GT is gonna be pretty good from now on and it’s because of PJ at the helm.
John
November 13th, 2009
11:38 am
I have confidence in PJ that I’ve never had in any Tech coach. That includes Bobby Ross.
TechMD
November 13th, 2009
11:43 am
Hey, Mark. Bowden’s going to ND. You heard it here first! lol
Charles Jackson
November 13th, 2009
11:45 am
Gee, another Bradley Paul Johnson is god column. Do they have motel room together yet?
Dollarbill
November 13th, 2009
11:54 am
The whole coaching staff of Navy should go to Notre Dame. Also I think Tech is ahead of schedule. Don’t get too excited because I think we have a lesson to learn before the next stage. Read LSU.
MightyQuinn
November 13th, 2009
11:57 am
“…..putting the horse before the cart.’ Coach Paul Johnson: speaks like George W. Bush, leads like George S. Patton.
Michael
November 13th, 2009
12:00 pm
That’s quite a claim, “Truth.” You should provide details.
JoeV
November 13th, 2009
12:01 pm
I haven’t seen coach worship like that of Paul Johnson since Steve Spurrier was hired at South Carolina. Next thing you know the Yellow Jacket nickname will change to the Georgia Tech Fighting Johnsons or Georgia Tech Yellow PJs.
Paul Johnson is an awesome coach and GT should be proud to have him. But don’t be like the Gamecocks; don’t worship your coach. Worship your team.
Sonny Clusters
November 13th, 2009
12:07 pm
Coach also taught shop and we was supposed to make a cart they could use to maintain the playing fields. Coach drew up some plans and we started building. They was no place for a horse. Not every cart has a horse out front and some may have a horse out back. Just saying CPJ may be right. Seems to be right about most everything else.
JacketFan
November 13th, 2009
12:07 pm
I make all of my decisions with http://whatwouldpauljohnsondo.com
Sonny Clusters
November 13th, 2009
12:14 pm
We was always hostile with folks from Cobb County. They looked down they noses at us and when they come to our stadium they was tension all around. Some Cobb County cheerleaders was making fun of our cheerleaders and they told us we was spelling “cheerleader” wrong . . . and sure enough we had been spelling it “chearleeder” for the longest time and nobody knew we was wrong. Well those comments started a tussle and soon all those cheerleaders from both sides was fighting and scratching and pulling hair and all on the ground wrestling and pulling they clothes and me and Jeff was right there when it happened and it was unforgettable and we was distracted and lost focus on the game and was almost not able to play that night.
Mark Richt's GEORGIA SATURDAYS
November 13th, 2009
12:15 pm
What would MARK RICHT do?
Soil his wife’s underwear he has on under his khakis, tell all the boosters how “CLOSE” UGA is to a National Title and give Willie Martinez a rub down in the back of his Ford pickup.
Dawghater
November 13th, 2009
12:19 pm
Hey SOUTH GA DAWG FAN – Why don’t you get out your checkbook and buy yourself a Defensive Cooridinator!
j
November 13th, 2009
12:19 pm
Dawg Fan 74,
You are correct! UGAY is ruling the bottom of the SEC and college football! Go ahead and keep on ruling with your awesome football team! Laughable!!!!
Dawghater
November 13th, 2009
12:20 pm
And yes I know it’s Coordinator
Wreck
November 13th, 2009
12:22 pm
The Truth- really? Really? It is killing you right now isn’t it. You are dead inside. I get it. Eventually though, “Tech lies and cheats” will only get you so far. In the short term it is probably good for your sanity. After many years of Tech dominance…off to the padded room…
helmet head
November 13th, 2009
12:22 pm
PJ is one ugly dude
techfan
November 13th, 2009
12:26 pm
Paul Johnson…the next Chuck Norris!!
Wreck
November 13th, 2009
12:28 pm
Hey JoeV- Don’t compare Tech to South Carolina. How many conference or national championships do the Gamecocks have? Hell, have they ever won their division? 10 bowl wins all time?
Apples and oranges.
Bank Walker, Texas Ranger
November 13th, 2009
12:32 pm
I believe in his moto cause I gotta fever and the only perscription is more cowbell. As far as ND, about half way between Atlanta and South Bend is the next coach.
Bank Walker, Texas Ranger
November 13th, 2009
12:34 pm
Now hold on techfan, I don’t know if PJ can execute a good round house kick!
Mark Bradley
November 13th, 2009
12:37 pm
Rich Brooks, you mean?
Bank Walker, Texas Ranger
November 13th, 2009
12:45 pm
Close, the dude at Cinncy
F-105 Thunderchief
November 13th, 2009
12:45 pm
Sony Betamaxes were fine machines and a great format. And when they stopped putting movies on Beta, you could buy them for a buck at the rental stores.
Bank Walker, Texas Ranger
November 13th, 2009
12:45 pm
Cincy
Eastside Jacket
November 13th, 2009
12:47 pm
Chuck Norris has a Paul Johnson lunch box.
Bank Walker, Texas Ranger
November 13th, 2009
12:49 pm
When Chuck Norris goes to bed at night he checks under the bed for Paul Johnson