There comes a moment in everyone’s life when decision-making becomes just too difficult. You weigh the pros. You weigh the cons. And still you can’t make a choice because, to be frank, choosing is just too hard. Door No. 1? Door No. 2? Buy a consonant? Buy a vowel? Oh, Mr. Kotter, I’m so confused!
At such a moment, there’s only one recourse. We need to ask ourselves: What would PJ do?
(Something daring, surely. I mean, the man only went for it on fourth down five times against Wake Forest. And never mind that the first four didn’t work. The fifth turned out OK.)
As fate would have it, a shadowy figure who goes by “Fireball” has created a practical aid to bolder choice-making. He first posted it on The Hive, where it was discovered and forwarded to me by (cough, cough) a highly placed Georgia Tech source. And with the help of another clandestine operative — OK, Timothy Briley, a Tech fan who lives in Tallahassee and is VP of the Tallahassee/Thomasville GT club — I was able to discover Fireball’s true identity.
Fireball is Sam Feuer. He graduated from Tech with a degree in chemical engineering. He lives in Atlanta. He played trombone in the Tech band from 1987 through 1992, which means he knows the Budweiser song by heart. His philosophy of life can be boiled down to two words: More cowbell. And he, in an act beneficial to all humanity, has created this aid to better living.
What would Paul Johnson do? Just spin the (figurative) dial below.