Before getting to this week’s big game — Florida vs. The Indecipherable Dogs of Athens — a world news update: Police in northern England tasered a 61-year-old blind man the other day after — and I’m not making this up — they mistook his white cane for a Samurai sword. Fortunately, the man, Colin Farmer, seems OK after being hit with 50,000 volts of electricity and handcuffed by England’s finest nincompoops, although he may own half the United Kingdom and be knighted before the next attorney knocks on his door.
The po-po chief, Stuart Williams, said, “It became apparent that this man was not the person we were looking for, and officers attended to him straight away. Lancashire Constabulary deeply regrets what has happened.” And then he excused himself for his new job — walking behind elephants.
He said police were responding to reports of a man walking around with a sword. Of course. So their intentions were honorable.