Posts Tagged ‘Florida Gators’

Before getting to this week’s expected resurrection, I felt the need to do some research on raising the dead. See, a year ago, Georgia lost its first two games of the season and was declared kaputski, only to win its next 10 games, thereby saving the season, the head coach and all hope for those who embrace the idea of bringing a corpse back to life, particularly in an election year. (”How much for that Lincoln or FDR on the top shelf? Can I at least get a discount on Andrew Jackson with a Kroger Plus Card?)

So here we are again, with the Bulldogs having flat-lined in South Carolina. This prompted some research on what it would take to raise the dead. (Street term: black magic, potions or campaign speeches). This is what I found on SpellsOfMagic.com. (Back off. I’m a journalist.):

It's a job for Dr. Frankenstein (pronounced: franken-SHTEEN).

This spell will raise the dead and make them immortal . Don’t use this spell no matter what resion[sic]. There is consequences. …

Continue reading Weekend Predictions: Bulldogs, Jackets rise from dead »

South Carolina's Marcus Lattimore is among those who've dented Georgia's defense. (The State photo)

ATHENS – Ten months ago, Mark Richt stood in front of a room in Butts-Mehre Hall and pronounced, “Today is a great day for Georgia.”

Notwithstanding that those words came at an orchestrated media event — two weeks after a bowl loss to Michigan State (please forget) and two weeks before national signing day (please come) – nobody could dispute the sentiment. In the room with Richt were 15 players who announced they were bypassing the NFL draft to return for another season. Nine played on defense. Another returnee was Jarvis Jones, who was attending a football camp that day.

Expectations were high for Georgia this season primarily for one reason: defense. There were nine returning starters. There were nine upperclassmen. There were four players projected to go as high as the first round in the next draft. There was a defensive coordinator, Todd Grantham, lauded to such a great …

Continue reading Bulldogs’ ‘NFL talent’ have their heads somewhere else »

Welcome back to Weekend Predictions, where we may fool you into taking one of our Just Kidding Picks once a while — Georgia over South Carolina? Just kidding — but we would never pimp out our abused young pawns to the highest bidder for the sake of a case of footballs, new carpeting and a dozen legal pads. Because then, we would be no better than a financially desperate athletic director.

And speaking of Georgia State. What next? Maybe lease out 20 or 30 players to the Atlanta Police Department for Taser practice? That would clear $100,000.

In another attempt to provide a thoroughly enriching college football experience — go with it — Georgia State athletic director Cheryl Levick has brokered deals to throw her fledgling program’s abused slabs of meat into the center of the Roman Coliseum against Alabama and West Virginia next season and Oregon in 2015.

Wait, I thought Cheryl Levick had blonde hair?

For these three sacrifices, GSU will make $2.15 million, less medical …

Continue reading Weekend Predictions: No sacrifices, but Falcons, LSU win »

Before getting to this week’s big game between Georgia and the S.S. Columbia, captained by Coach Queeg, we have some news related to roosters: It’s World Farm Animals Week!

I checked PETA’s website, and fortunately they did not mandate that all SEC schools with animal mascots change their names to something more acceptable, like to the Fighting Whole Grain Muffins, but it did commemorate this event with a blog that read in part: “By the end of the day, 104,273 cows, 297,392 pigs, 702,383 turkeys, and 21,261,534 chickens will have been killed in the U.S. to satisfy an old eating habit.”

"Bread. Milk. Overthrow Liechtenstein."

And I know what you heathens are thinking: Does that come with fries? Because I’m pretty sure if cows, pigs, turkeys and chickens were sitting at the top of the food chain instead of on the right side of the menu, they would pull into a “Bones” (same name) and ask: “Does the Spurrier chops come with a side? Actually, never mind. They had a weird bitter …

Continue reading Predictions: Dogs over Darth Rooster, Falcons over Skins »

Welcome back for another week of almost-flawless investment advice. We’re off to a decent start here: 17-5 overall, 14-8 against the spread and 12-0 in the games I was really serious about. The “Sack Schultz 2012″ contest is not playing out as well. I went 8-7 last week, which puts me in 319th place, or right on track to win the trip to … Kabul.

If things don’t improve, I may have to reassess my marketing leverage and join the ACC (at least in softball and lacrosse).

And speaking of numbers:

OMG — the Denver school people are right!

The Falcons face Beelzebub this week. No, not Bobby Petrino — Peyton Manning. Yes, Manning is pure evil. Or at least his jersey number is. The Greeley-Evans (Colo.) school district has barred kids from wearing Manning jerseys because he’s No. 18, and there’s concern that he has ties to the “18th Street” gang, or maybe because 666 (The Number of the Beast!) adds up to 18, or maybe because every single member of the Greeley-Evans School District is …

Continue reading Predictions: Falcons over No. 666, Tech wins, Pigs faceplant »

Will Muschamp is under some pressure after going 3-5 in SEC in first season. (AP photo)

(It’s Day 2 at SEC Media Days. Here’s a quick look at Will Muschamp and Florida.)

HOOVER, Ala. — Shortly after taking over as coach at Florida, Will Muschamp summoned Janoris Jenkins to his office and informed the talented but troubled cornerback that he would be suspended for five games because of multiple failed drug tests.

Jenkins’ response was not one of remorse but rather entitlement. He told Muschamp: “Do you know who you’re talking to?” And so ended Jenkins’ career at Florida.

We use that story partly to defend Muschamp, who has come under some heat, and illustrate the problems he has dealt with at Florida since replacing Urban Meyer. A dozen players have left or been run off in the past year. It’s now clear the talent base at Florida wasn’t what you would expect – and Meyer probably knew this, which is why he “retired” in the first place: He saw the problems coming.

Any claims …

Continue reading SEC Media Days: Muschamp deserves some time at Florida »

Mark Richt will need to have a high degree of success to increase his paycheck at Georgia. (AP photo)

Mark Richt won 10 straight games last season, brought Georgia to the SEC championship for the first time in six years and generally allayed fears that the football program was starting to circle the drain.

But he is not going to get a raise, and that pretty much indicates where the bar has been set in Athens.

Richt’s contract extension is still not finalized. It unofficially has been stuck on “almost finished” longer than any document in American history.

The most intriguing part of the new deal won’t be contract length but the amount of Richt’s buyout, which is the best indicator of somebody’s job security. (It’s much easier to fire a coach with a $2 million buyout than a $10 million buyout.)  But athletic director Greg McGarity confirmed Thursday that Richt won’t be receiving a raise in the new deal.

Speaking to the UGA’s athletic board at annual meetings in Greensboro, …

Continue reading Mark Richt’s pay tied to incentives, as it should be »

Bobby Bowden supports Georgia's drug policy but says it might leave the team at a competitive disadvantage.

ATHENS – It’s fair to start with this: There is no excuse for doing something wrong.

There is no excuse for stealing money from a teammate’s dorm room, just because you’re short of cash. No excuse for getting into a physical altercation with a girlfriend, just because there was an argument. No excuse for getting high, just because … well, just because. No excuse for exploring the cannabis culinary arts and eating Alice B. Toklas brownies, just because you were on spring break and you were hungry and, really, honest, pinky-swear, you didn’t even know that there was marijuana in them (uh, right.)

These are some of the reasons why Georgia coach Mark Richt has been suspending or dismissing players at an alarming rate lately – eight since January. This is when nobody seems to remember how many stars were by a recruit’s name on national signing day. Funny how that works.

Richt …

Continue reading Georgia’s problems reaffirm NCAA needs uniform drug policy »

Before Florida fans complain, they should remember Urban Meyer won this thing for them — twice. (AP photo)

(Updated: 10:35 a.m.)

Urban Meyer just went from savior to Satan in Gainesville. Sorry, but did Florida fans really expect he was going to spend the rest of his life sitting in a climate-controlled studio and planting pansies?

Welcome to reality, Gator fans. You’re apparently the last one to figure out that Meyer is no less disingenuous than any other college coach, and he might be worse.

The former Florida coach reportedly has taken the head coaching job at Ohio State, confirming the worst kept secret in sports. Kudos to the blog sites ElevenWarriors and SportsByBrooks, which were way ahead of this story on Nov. 18.

(For what it’s worth: Meyer’s agent denied to cbssports.com’s Dennis Dodd that Meyer has accepted the job. But at this point, we’re probably talking semantics.)

Gator fans are upset. They believe Meyer betrayed them, and, well, maybe he did just a little. …

Continue reading Florida fans: Stop whining about Meyer going to Ohio State »

Aron White, Christian Robinson punctuate UGA's return with school flag . (Johnny Crawford)

This is the column that I didn’t think I would be writing six weeks ago, when Georgia fizzled and nearly self-destructed at Vanderbilt, and a five-game winning streak seemed like the furthest thing from Mark Richt’s mind.

This is the column that didn’t seem plausible three months ago when I looked up at the scoreboard and saw, “Boise State 35, Georgia 21” after looking down on the Georgia Dome field to see a Bulldogs team get beat physically by a Mountain West Conference team and play flat emotionally — the worst possible exacta for a hyped-up season opener.

This is the column that says Georgia can beat LSU.

This is not to diminish anything LSU has accomplished this season. How can one diminish an SEC team going 12-0? The Tigers have played and beaten seven teams that were ranked at the time they played. That includes No. 3 Oregon to start the season (40-27), No. 2 Alabama in Tuscaloosa …

Continue reading Georgia has far better than ‘puncher’s chance’ against LSU »