The Count has been doing P90X, hours of core and drinking yak-liver-and-wheat-grass shakes. Can you tell?
Notice how the cape fits a little looser. The face is slightly thinner, and is a brighter shade of slurple. The fangs no longer drip with bacon grease.
It’s necessary for that mid-summer, buff-for-the-beach look, especially in an Olympic year. There are too many great physical specimens around the world on display right now in London, and maybe we’ll even get to see them one day on NBC’s national, tape-delay-delay-delay, oh-look-Nero-is-going-to-win-his-chariot heat broadcast.
It’s late July, which also means NFL teams are training camps and the buff Tim Tebow and 3,000 lesser football players are hard at work, glistening with sweat in the mid-day sun.
Yeah. I went there. We count down . . .
10. Oh, he’s a perfect 10 . .
OK. The Count tries to be judicious when it comes to Tim Tebow items, because, really, we have nothing against the young man. It’s not like he’s just
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