Predictions: Georgia wins on Red-and-Black Saturday

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Before we get to this week’s big question — will Georgia be caught looking ahead to the SEC Championship game, the BCS title game, world domination, next year’s rankings, global peace, contact with an alien life form and a voice from a burning bush somehow lose to Georgia Tech — let’s get to what really matters.

The continuing devolution of mankind. I speak, of course, of Black Friday.

Once we’ve finished our annual Thursday tradition of consuming four helpings of turkey, three pieces of ham, 17 side dishes, six rolls (or was it seven?), three desserts and a Diet Coke and lapsing into a food coma, we’ll segue into Shopping on Steroids. Black Friday is that wonderful time when we rise at 3 a.m. after four hours of sleep to save $40 on a laptop, $6 on a sweatshirt and 27 cents on Play-Doh.

December wasn't good enough. He just had to start after Thanksgiving.

December wasn't good enough. He just had to start after Thanksgiving.

We’ll be overcome by feelings of a tremendous conquest, until the following week when these same items are on sale for the same price, only without the 400-pound, fire-breathing woman who elbowed you in the head the week before as she reached for the $12 Crock-Pot.

The first Black Friday came following the first Macy’s Thanksgiving Day Parade in 1924, when Santa Claus finished waving to little children, complained of a sore rump and a headache and said, “That wasn’t worth 50 bucks. Where’s my scotch?”

Stay in bed. I’ll generate riches for you so you can afford things full retail!

I’ll make this quick: Georgia is better than Georgia Tech at every single position. The Bulldogs have the added advantage of not having had to fire their defensive coordinator or seeing their athletic director quit for another job. Does Tech have a chance? Of course. Weird things happen in rivalry games. But I’ll side with facts: Better players, more at stake, home field.

It’s Red-and-Black Saturday: Dogs win and cover 13.

Sack Schultz Predictions: upset, Upset, UPSET!

Black Friday Hysteria! (Highlight: Woman who loses her wig)

And Down The Stretch They Come!

(Buy two picks, win of a copy of Maryland’s 10-point guide to financial freedom. Chapter 1: Blow all of your funding. Chapter 2: Join the Big Ten.  Chapter 3: Whatever.)

Here are some others coaches Saban is fond of.

Here are some others coaches Saban is fond of.

Florida at FSU: The Gators have looked crummy the past few weeks. Will Muschamp’s retort: “We don’t win sexy, but my wife said, ‘You’re sexy.’” Show up in Tallahassee with leopard-skin briefs and a silk robe and just watch what Chief Osceola does with that flaming spear. However: Upset alert! Florida wins (but take the 8 just in case).

Auburn at Alabama: Nick Saban on Gene Chizik: “I personally think he’s done a really fine job.” Think of a fisherman praising the dead flounder in his boat. Bammy covers 31½.

LSU at Arkansas: Three future 7-Eleven night managers have recorded a song, pleading Jon Gruden to take the Arkansas job. The “Hey Grude” (sung to “Hey Jude”) video went viral — kind of like smallpox. Gruden hasn’t responded. He’s hoping Chernobyl comes through with a better benefits package. Tigers cover 12.

Three non-MBA’s from Arkansas

South Carolina at Clemson: Steve Spurrier has a chance to become South Carolina’s all-time winningest coach. I think that’s like holding the Double-A career hits record. (Bang! And here comes the email.) Clemson covers 4.

Say hello to the trophy in the "Battle for the Barrel" (Tennessee vs. Kentucky)

Meet the trophy boy for UK-UT: "Battle for the Barrel."

Help Wanted Bowl: Kentucky and Tennessee meet in the annual “Battle for the Barrel. But with two fired coaches and 14 SEC losses between them, UT might need a lure to get students to show up, like free sandwiches. Or tuition. Vols cover 13.

Miami at Duke: The NCAA sent semi-threatening letters to former Miami players, demanding evidence against infamous rich creep Nevin Shapiro. If the NCAA just throws a party on a yacht instead, I’m sure all of the players would show up. Canes cover 6½.

Maryland at North Carolina: Question: When Maryland cut a deal with the Big Ten, did school administrators have to dress up as, you know, like naughty nurses or something? Or was everybody just cool with the cash being left on the nightstand? Heels cover 24½.

Welcome to the Maryland School of Bidness

NFL TRIFECTA

Falcons at Tampa Bay: Matt Ryan threw five interceptions last week. Hey, maybe he just wanted to get it out of his system before the playoffs. (Sorry. Can’t help myself.) Falcons cover 1.

Packers at Giants: Jermichael Finley on Aaron Rodgers: “If I could throw myself the ball and run under it, I’d do it every play because he’s just not throwing me the ball like he used to.” Smart. He might want to bring a book this week. Giants cover 2½.

49ers at Saints: Paul Tagliabue says he’ll rule on the Saints’ bounty penalties by Dec. 4. So don’t be surprised if Jonathan Vilma jumps bail after the Falcons’ game in two weeks and hides in your bushes. San Fran covers 2.

Bounty Hearings=Disorder In The Court

TIME TO SETTLE UP

sportsbetting“Eat your betting money but don’t bet your eating money.” – Proverb.

Last week (feh): 9-2 straight up, 6-5 against the line.

Bottom dollars (fab): 100-34 straight up, 78-55-1 against the line.

“Sack Schultz” update: Congrats to Richard Schoenfeld of Duluth for winning the UGA-Tech tickets, Chick-fil-A Bowl tickets and a one night stay at Hotel Indigo in Athens. The $5,000 trip to Hawaii will be decided in two weeks.

Lilly Pick of the Week: Lilly is on a four-game winning streak since her one-week furlough. This week, it was a choice between cheese-accessorized pictures of Uga and Buzz. She went with her species. Dogs win.

Buzz on the left. Uga on the right. First and second-place both win cheese.

Buzz on the left. Uga on the right. First and second-place both win cheese.

By Jeff Schultz

383 comments Add your comment

mike on lake hartwell

November 21st, 2012
9:33 pm

holy moly. its a miracle

mike on lake hartwell

November 21st, 2012
9:33 pm

holy moly. its a miracle

mike on lake hartwell

November 21st, 2012
9:35 pm

and to my beloved georgia football men:

G A T F A dawgs!!!!!!! wreck tech.

u make us proud. thank you!

K

November 21st, 2012
9:36 pm

Silly article, Schultz.
But fun read. Hope you lose your pick on the Tech-Ga game.
To Hell with GA!!!!!!!!!
Stranger things have happened.

K

November 21st, 2012
9:39 pm

Miracles do happen!

MattDawg

November 21st, 2012
9:41 pm

Yeah K like Tech fan being realistic!

Greg

November 21st, 2012
9:47 pm

OF COURSE UGA is going to beat Tech. We always do. Nothing to see here

DOGGIE

November 21st, 2012
9:56 pm

Is that the same dog that picked UGA over the Gamecocks?

Fidlin1

November 21st, 2012
9:56 pm

Georgia would have to give it away. But since I’ve been watching the Dawgs since ‘67 I throw the records aside and hold on for a big ride of an emotional roller coaster. I’m glad it’s in Athens this year.
GO DOGS!!

Dawg Whisperer

November 21st, 2012
10:00 pm

Percy sezs…. dawgs take megabyte out of bees, 38-24.

TechBoy

November 21st, 2012
10:01 pm

Hey Jeff. Predictions aside (excuse the blasphemy), I have been reading much about the Big Ten and the more I read the more I think they are full of themselves. Apparently, Maryland and Rutgers are total winners who have been hamstrung by their respective conferences. But, in the comforting financial arms of the Big Ten, they will become the winners they were always destined to be. Give me a break! Despite the explosion of rumors and panic these two moves created, it looks to this unprofessional eye that the Big Ten is bluffing at the Finals table. What if, despite all rumors, everyone stands pat? Whoops Mr. Delany I say. News flash, NYC could not care less about football and cares less for Rutgers. Maryland? This Tech Boy says good riddance. Oh, and THWG!

Purple stuff

November 21st, 2012
10:02 pm

Dawgs drinking the koolaid again. Yall have played two good teams all season, neither with a good offense. If Mike Slive doesn’t give the order to the refs in the UGA vs GSU game yall are trailing Ga. Southern at the half.
Guarantee we will hear the fire Richt crowd before the season is over

TechBoy

November 21st, 2012
10:04 pm

Oh, and I think the nation is going to be introduced to Vad Lee this weekend. I am a big Tevin Washington Fan, but few folks realize what we have been sitting on with Mr. Lee. He’s a player.

Ellijay

November 21st, 2012
10:04 pm

I have realized gtu fans belong to a secret society. A secret nerd society.

K

November 21st, 2012
10:05 pm

UGA really does need to be focused on their championship game with Bama.
In their minds they’ve already won the game with Tech.
Again! To Hell with Georgia!!!!!

TechBoy

November 21st, 2012
10:06 pm

And what the heck are you feeding you lovely Miss Lily?

dawggirl

November 21st, 2012
10:06 pm

I never get tired of Lilly pics, and not because she picked UGA. She’s just such a beautiful dog.

Ah, Back to School. I never tire of 80’s movies references either.

Hope the Dawgs come out on top, but I hope for a clean game with no injuries on either side. All the best to all of our seniors, I’m really going to miss those guys.

GTBob

November 21st, 2012
10:09 pm

Georgia wins easily.
Florida St wins easily.
Clemson wins a close one.
Duke upsets Canes.

Discount DoubleDawg

November 21st, 2012
10:12 pm

over/under- Does Gurley rush for 125yrds+ vs Tech?

I say over… If I am wrong then Murray throws for over 300 and 3-4 TD’s…

Greg

November 21st, 2012
10:18 pm

I think Gurley rushes for under 125 DoubleDawg. Tech will sell out to stop the run. They have to or they won’t win.

Sam Houston

November 21st, 2012
10:18 pm

Who is handling field goals and kick-offs for Tech?

Discount DoubleDawg

November 21st, 2012
10:19 pm

Bob! Great to see you here tonight… It seems you have been quiet these days… Glad to see you here my friend. What is your play tonight my friend? What do you have to say about the game this weekend?

Discount DoubleDawg

November 21st, 2012
10:20 pm

Greg- you might be right… for some reason I just see Gurley gashing the tech D. I could be wrong as I only have a gut feeling on this.

technut

November 21st, 2012
10:22 pm

THWG, no matter who wins, GT is the puppies boss come monday! Super-size it mutt.

Silly Bloggers

November 21st, 2012
10:23 pm

I believe all the games within 10…rivalry games tend to do that…bama an exception..au may not score. I’m confident in UGA winning but don’t expect feeling comfortable until the 4th

Discount DoubleDawg

November 21st, 2012
10:24 pm

GTBob

November 21st, 2012
10:26 pm

Discount DoubleDawg, good to see you too! You think I have been quiet? Read a few pages of Jeff’s previous blog. As for the game this weekend, GT can’t stop anybody on defense and I don’t really expect that to change with UGA. If UGA forces GT to punt more than once then it should be an easy win. GT’s only chance is to win in a shootout, or get lucky with turnovers like UGA did against Florida.

GTBob

November 21st, 2012
10:28 pm

Greg- you might be right… for some reason I just see Gurley gashing the tech D. I could be wrong as I only have a gut feeling on this.

I don’t see why they would even try. GT’s run defense is average. Their pass defense is beyond horrible. Why wouldn’t they exploit our weakness? Running the ball against us is a bit of a gift.

Birdhair

November 21st, 2012
10:30 pm

Richt 31-1 in Athens vs. non-sec opponents. 10-1 vs Nerds.

Greg

November 21st, 2012
10:30 pm

I think Marshall goes for more yards in this game than Gurley. Gurley will be used more against Bama and they probably won’t give Gurley many carries in this one. I know it sounds crazy but remember how Gurley was the main back vs. Florida. He had 27 carries for 118 yards and a touchdown vs. the Gators. He’ll likely have around the same vs. Bama next week. No reason to bang him up vs. Tech this week. That’s why Marshall will get more carries IMO.

A Waste of Keystrokes

November 21st, 2012
10:31 pm

So I gotta ask… All season long the UGA haters have forecast a loss for us in almost every game. As all of the Tech posters have stated: crazy things can happen. So here is my question: Let’s say the UGA beats Tech, squeaks out a close victory against Alabama, and then beat Nortre Dame for the MNC. What the heck will you say then? I guess all we will hear is that it doesn’t really matter. It’s only one National Championship. Bama was over rated. Florida was having a down year. The fix was in. The refs were paid off. The Dawgs schedule was too soft. Etc. etc. etc.

Does UGA get ANY credit if the stars align and we do win the BCS Championship?

Greg

November 21st, 2012
10:31 pm

GTboob, you see how you just said UGA got lucky with turnovers vs. Florida? Well Florida only had 4 turnovers the ENTIRE YEAR before they played UGA but UGA forced 6…that’s right FORCED. Florida didn’t just give UGA 6 turnovers you buffoon.

Discount DoubleDawg

November 21st, 2012
10:32 pm

Gtbob- what could Ga Tech do to improve their program? seriously and all joking aside, I know you are an intelligent guy… If you were AD, what would your plan be to improve the program?

I honestly believe Tech could be so much more… My grandfather was a tech guy and I have always appreciated you guys (to an extent)… why can’t you guys get over the hump?

Beast from the East

November 21st, 2012
10:34 pm

I have a feeling all three of the ACC/SEC match-ups will be close games. The SEC takes at least 2 of them.

Paul in NH

November 21st, 2012
10:36 pm

UGA wins but doesn’t cover
FSU close in an ugly game
Alabama in a blowout
LSU, Clemson, UNC cover
Miami in a close one
I am up to 11 in Sack Schultz – pulling up to 1 off the lead this week and off to Hawaii at the end of the year!

Greg

November 21st, 2012
10:36 pm

This game should not be close at all. Tech has no threat against UGA. UGA has already practiced against the triple option last week and they know how to defend it. We held Tech to 243 rushing yards last year and 17 points (7 of those coming in the final minutes)…

Birdhair

November 21st, 2012
10:36 pm

CPJ really trending poorly the past 3 years. He got off to a hot start in 2008 and did well in 09. But he cheated in ‘09, so that acc title was thrown out.

The nerds love CPJ because he has his head up his a**. But that’s also his downfall. He doesn’t recruit well because of it.

CPJ won with Gailey’s players. Poor GTBobby spends all of his time attempting to diminish UGA’s wins as opposed to sitting on the nerd blogs calling for change!

Greg

November 21st, 2012
10:38 pm

The reason Tech comes over to the UGA site is because Ken Siruga of their site is lazy and doesn’t post nearly as much as Chip Towers does for UGA. Go over and look at how much coverage there is on this week’s game compared to UGA’s. Not even close.

cloudodust

November 21st, 2012
10:40 pm

As a 2012 weekly winner of ‘Sack Schultz’ (Thank you very much, Thank you, thank you. Please sit down), I’m simply aghast that UGA-GT isn’t on the board this week. What’s up wid dat, JS..? Be that as it may, may the best teams win and bring me up from the bottom of the rankings barrel. And eating at Marlow’s, Superb, especially since it’s free. But it is good food.

Paul in NH

November 21st, 2012
10:40 pm

There are actually 4 SEC-ACC games this weekend. Vandy over Wake big. MD made a big mistake when they ran off Franklin and then Fridge

Rambo Dog

November 21st, 2012
10:41 pm

technut
November 21st, 2012
10:22 pm

Sad little boy, get back in your dorm room and play with your little friends.

Birdhair

November 21st, 2012
10:42 pm

Check this out: In Birdhair’s career at UGA
Losses against teams that were not ranked
2006 (2) vs Vandy, Kentucky
2007 (2) vs S. Carolina (was ranked at high as #8 during the season), Tenn (ended season ranked #16)
2009 (2) vs Tenn (Tenn lost to #1 Bama by 10., Loss to #1 Florida by 2), Kentucky
2010 (3) Miss St (finished season ranked #21), Colorado, Florida (began season ranked #4)

BIRDHAIR SIMPLY DOES NOT LOSE TO INFERIOR, UNRANKED TALENT!!!

GTBob

November 21st, 2012
10:47 pm

If you were AD, what would your plan be to improve the program?

There isn’t much the new AD could do. Most of the problems with Tech Football are at the school level. The administration is not all that committed to making Tech a serious football contender and therefore they probably never will be. One thing the AD could do is try to get some leniency on the allowed academic exemptions. That would provide some help but significant change would require a cultural shift.

GTBob

November 21st, 2012
10:50 pm

Florida didn’t just give UGA 6 turnovers you buffoon.

Why hasn’t UGA forced 6 turnovers in every game then? Was the Florida game the only one they tried in? Im sure UGA forced a couple of them but no one forces 6 turnovers. One that I can remember off the top of my head was Driskel throwing across his body over the middle with time running out in the half. Any decent QB would have thrown it away.

Greg

November 21st, 2012
10:50 pm

We need to come out and run the ball down Tech’s throat similar to 2009’s WE RUN THIS STATE game. I think Joe Cox attempted like 5 passes that game.

Paul in NH

November 21st, 2012
10:51 pm

Birdhair at 10:42 has an interesting post – lists all the losses against teams that ended the year unranked then shouts that Birdhair simply does not lose to unranked talent. I guess the word “NOT” has a different meaning for some people.

GTBob

November 21st, 2012
10:52 pm

But he cheated in ‘09, so that acc title was thrown out.

CPJ cheated? How exactly?

Sam

November 21st, 2012
10:52 pm

The Black Friday video is hilarious.

Paul in NH

November 21st, 2012
10:55 pm

If Bobo decides to run the ball it means he hasn’t been watching film of GT’s DB’s

UGA Season Ticket Holder since 1986

November 21st, 2012
10:55 pm

Waste – What they will do if Georgia wins out is come on this blog, pretend to be Georgia fans and scream “Fire Richt!’ (just like they do every single day of their miserable lives).