Predictions: Falcons over No. 666, Tech wins, Pigs faceplant
Welcome back for another week of almost-flawless investment advice. We’re off to a decent start here: 17-5 overall, 14-8 against the spread and 12-0 in the games I was really serious about. The “Sack Schultz 2012″ contest is not playing out as well. I went 8-7 last week, which puts me in 319th place, or right on track to win the trip to … Kabul.
If things don’t improve, I may have to reassess my marketing leverage and join the ACC (at least in softball and lacrosse).
And speaking of numbers:
OMG -- the Denver school people are right!
The Falcons face Beelzebub this week. No, not Bobby Petrino — Peyton Manning. Yes, Manning is pure evil. Or at least his jersey number is. The Greeley-Evans (Colo.) school district has barred kids from wearing Manning jerseys because he’s No. 18, and there’s concern that he has ties to the “18th Street” gang, or maybe because 666 (The Number of the Beast!) adds up to 18, or maybe because every single member of the Greeley-Evans School District is a complete boob.
One elementary school sent home an 8-year-old in a Manning jersey. But hey, he brought red jello for lunch, and … well do I even need to say it?
The school district has banned (I’m not making this up) 18, 13, 14 (all with supposed “gang” links), as well as 81, 31 and 41 (uh, the dreaded, “Transposed Gang”?), as well as an assortment of square roots, fractions and pi (which I believe is Latin for: “Luca Brazi sleeps with the fishes”). Thank you, educators.
Now, learn something: There’s panic in Falconland. Brent Grimes is injured. Manning is coming to town. He’s bringing the entire underworld with him! Oh wait, Mike Shanahan is in Washington now. Never mind. But I don’t see the Broncos stopping the Falcons’ offense, and the second-half defense in Kansas City was impressive.
It will be close. But evil shall fall. Falcons win and cover 3.
Total Frat Moves
If this guy's smart, he'll stay out of Johnson's way.
Virginia at Georgia Tech: Paul Johnson responded to the news of Notre Dame becoming a sorta ACC member as you would expect. He punched a leprechaun. All obnoxious little punks may be at risk if Johnson drops to 0-2 in the ACC for the first time. Also Al Groh. But no worries. Jackets cover 10½.
FAU at Georgia: Big week for Georgia. They get back two suspended players but still have to wait for two others, Bacarri Rambo and Alec Ogletree, who totally accidentally, mistakenly, keep eating the same pot brownies, thinking they were straight from Kroger. (Honest.) Half the team could be in leg chains this week, and it wouldn’t matter. Dogs win but take FAU and 43.
Georgia has had a problems with “Certain Substances”
Alabama at Pig Remnants: After losing to Louisiana-Monroe, Arkansas coach John L. Smith needed a rallying cry. He settled on: “We’re still undefeated in the league.” Now there’s a statement with a limited shelf life. The laughter continues: Tide covers 20.
Florida at Tennessee: Vols quarterback Tyler Bray got a tattoo of his name across his back — and the letters in stars. OK. So now we know he can’t audible. Take Florida and 3 and the Gators in a straight upset.
These shirts are selling well in Louisiana. In Arkansas, not so much. (Via ULM.edu/shock)
La.-Monroe at Auburn: The NCAA continues to hover over Auburn. Now it’s about a recruit (Jovon Robinson) having his high school transcript altered, which led to him being declared academically ineligible. I’m not declaring guilt or innocence here. But given the amount of time NCAA investigators spend in Auburn, wouldn’t buying a condo save on hotel costs? Tigers win, but take ULM and 16½.
Wake Forest at FSU: Wake has won four of the past six meetings, including last season as a 10-point underdog. I hate research: Clouds the judgment. Seminoles cover 28.
USC at Stanford: Lane Kiffin banned a reporter from practice and “suspended” his credential for a home game for reporting (accurately) that a Trojans kicker underwent knee surgery. Kiffin doesn’t want any medical news to get out. Like that metal plate in his head, for example. (Postscript: The school reversed the decision and told Kiffin no cartoons for a week.) Trojans win, but give me Stanford and 8.
Maybe Lane just got the wrong brain
Between Bounties
Saints at Panthers: The Saints’ defense allowed 40 points in their season opener to the Redskins. The good news is they don’t have to convince anybody that the bounty program is over. Feeling an upset: Take the 2½, but Carolina wins straight up.
Ravens at Eagles: Michael Vick threw four interceptions in Game 1. Somewhere in Philadelphia, there are a roomful of lawyers looking for an escape route in his $100 million contract. Take the 2½ and Baltimore in a mild upset.
Bucs at N.Y. Giants: The defending Super Bowl champions lost their season opener. Tom Coughlin firing rumors start in 3…2…1… Giants cover 7½.
Lions at 49ers: Jim Harbaugh promises if the 49ers win he won’t give Jim Schwartz another semi-assault handshake like he did last season. Maybe a pile-driver this time. San Francisco covers 6½.
•
Bottom Dollars
“Horse sense is the thing a horse has which keeps it from betting on people.” – W.C. Fields.
Last week: 7-4 straight up, 7-4 against the line.
Season to date: 17-5 straight up, 14-8 against the line.
“Sack Schultz” update: Nicholas Norys (Dacula) and Petr Kasparek (Harrison, Ark.) were the weekly winners, each going 13-2. Punks. Contest is still open for a chance to win game tickets and a trip to Hawaii. Go to AJC.com/go/sackschultz2012.
Lilly’s Pick of the Week: The mutt is 1-1. This week’s race for the biscuit was between the Falcons and Broncos. I put up pictures of Matt Ryan and Peyton Manning. She didn’t hesitate: Manning and Broncos win.
For what it's worth: This was the fastest decision Lilly has ever made.
By Jeff Schultz
•
– Previous episodes of Weekend Predictions: Click here
– To win $1 million, click here (again … again …)
Recent past episodes (no charge):
– Loss of Brent Grimes doesn’t have to derail Falcons’ season
– Video blog: On Brent Grimes, Falcons’ offense and some early picks
– Falcons finally show an offense worthy of their talent
– Short takes: 3 thoughts on Falcons’ win over Chiefs
– Short takes: 3 thoughts on Georgia’s win over Missouri
– Georgia starts slow, then writes the winning script
– Georgia needs to avoid playing catch-up in SEC again
– Weekend Predictions: Dogs, Falcons win and a ‘Sack’ video update
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267 comments Add your comment
Matt "CHOKE" Ryan
September 14th, 2012
8:26 am
Well you delusional people once crowned CHOKE the 2nd coming of Peyton………..
Well here is your chance…….The real Peyton will be in town.
Lets see how Peyton like will CHOKE be with two lock down corners and
Dumerville & Von Miller putting that pressure in his face
Vol in bethlehem
September 14th, 2012
8:26 am
Matt “CHOKE” Ryan ,
They say they call him matty ice because come play off time he always freezes up!
Falcon Jim
September 14th, 2012
8:35 am
“CHOKE” keeps on playin dem slobber blues on da ole skin flute……………………….
Falcon Jim
September 14th, 2012
8:38 am
Ever notice that “CHOKE” and “Joe Tess Fish House” are never seen in the same place at the same time?…………………..mmmmmmmmmmmmm
Matt "CHOKE" Ryan
September 14th, 2012
8:49 am
@Vol in bethlehem
At least he’s consistent
9 years and no playoff wins…..pathetic
Falcon Jim
September 14th, 2012
8:57 am
“CHOKE”…………………give us your auto-bio.
(this should be interesting, folks.)
Falcon Jim
September 14th, 2012
8:58 am
“CHOKE”, if Ryan out-plays Manning, will you disappear? (PLEASE !)
True Falcon Fan
September 14th, 2012
9:35 am
Hey ZERO the BIG FLAPPER,,, The Trolley was 35 years before your time too “U FAKE” — You are pretty lame mentioning Valdosta High as if wanting someone to think/interpret you have a wealth of knowledge, “WHAT FRICKING FAKE”, coward too — you probably were not even a teardrop in your Momma & Daddy’s eyes (re: Daddy – of whom you don’t even know the where abouts, I’m sure). Son — you wouldn’t fit even today in those jock straps (ooops maybe on your head)! HaHa
Go Falcons – #18 Manning Next
GT Dad
September 14th, 2012
9:35 am
I’m a Lousiana-Monroe grad and proud for their win last week. They are by no means a top caliber team, but they played their hearts out. I don’t wish any ill on the Arkansas players – they are caught in the mess as a result of their coach’s cr*p (which is an example of karma if there ever was one…) However, their present coach’s refusal to meet the ULM coach on the field after the game and taking most of his team to locker room with him shows total lack of class and poor sportsmanship.
ULM has been in a huge media frenzy this past week, which is not anything they are used to. I’m thinking they are not going to be prepared for Auburn as they need to be, but hope they show up.
HUH?????
September 14th, 2012
9:46 am
“Kinda like the Engineers in ‘Prometheus’ ”
That movie was just awful.
HUH?????
September 14th, 2012
9:47 am
“I’m thinking they are not going to be prepared for Auburn as they need to be, but hope they show up.”
As an Auburn guy, I have to disagree with you there. Auburn is in total chaos right now. No heart, no leadership.
Steve Spurrier
September 14th, 2012
9:48 am
Man, I’m going for #200. Is that not news? Gee, I didn’t know UGA fans still care.
HUH?????
September 14th, 2012
9:48 am
BTW, I’m glad the trees aren’t alive to see how bad this Auburn football team is.
Falcon Jim
September 14th, 2012
9:49 am
consider the source
HUH?????
September 14th, 2012
9:50 am
“Ribs looked great.”
People in GA know NOTHING about real BBQ. Not. one. thing.
heywood...
September 14th, 2012
10:39 am
jeff, i think some quarter round would add a nice touch to those basement baseboards.
JSS
September 14th, 2012
10:42 am
My family has BBQ’ed in the Tidewaters, NC, KC, FL and the Texas Hill Country… Son, we know BBQ… Stop being provincial…
Tide Rising
September 14th, 2012
10:45 am
Huh????,
Auburn should not be a bad football team. They’ve got talent all over the field. The single most important issue they seem to have is that they are terrible at the single most important position on the field- qb. That’s how important that one position is and in Auburn’s case the difference between Kiehl Frazier and Cam Newton is like the difference between night and day.
HUH?????
September 14th, 2012
10:53 am
“My family has BBQ’ed in the Tidewaters, NC, KC, FL and the Texas Hill Country”
Ma’am, you don’t know $hit about BBQ.
Memphis.
Nuff said, biotch!
Falcon Jim
September 14th, 2012
10:54 am
Kept getting kicked out?
HUH?????
September 14th, 2012
10:57 am
Tide Rising
Chizik and his “this is a young team” is on thin ice with a lot of people in the Auburn circles. Nick Saban knows how to coach and has had two ok qbs do a really good job. Frazier is not that good and it is evident every time he steps on the field. He can’t throw, run or read defenses. The blame is all on Chizik. The defense is just as bad as it was under Roof. Those guys can not make a tackle.
I’ll admit now that Newton was THE reason AU won a championship. He was a leader and rallied the team many times.
I’ll also admit that I’m on the verge of becoming a Bama fan since a lot of my family members graduated from UAT.
JSS
September 14th, 2012
10:57 am
Ha ha, and you people keep tying your “fan loyalties” to people like that nut TFF…
My Father is in the same place he’s been at since they threw the last shovel of dirt on his vault in Woodlawn Cemetery on April 8, 1967… Your myopic hatred is just sad…
That cliff you like jumping off like Wily E. Coyote is still full of fantasy air! Mothers, Fathers, and surgical products, man the psychotic episodes of “the True Falcon Fan” brought to by Asbestos (insert Radio organ sounds)…
gdawginkalamazoo
September 14th, 2012
10:57 am
After that win last week I’ll bet that La-Mo shows up in Auburn and plays another good game. I loved the t-shirt.
JSS
September 14th, 2012
11:03 am
Stupid, where do you think the KC style of BBQ originated? Oh that is right, Memphis! Gee, you are multi-user name poster who doesn’t even know how BBQ styles migrated across the country…
JSS
September 14th, 2012
11:06 am
Ha ha, Falcon Jim, no they had kids and they took their grown butts on down the road!
Falcon Jim
September 14th, 2012
11:11 am
Going to lunch shortly……….think I’ll have Chinese
True Falcon Fan
September 14th, 2012
11:26 am
Anybody remember Ole Hickory House BBQ —- Man that was the BEST for sure!
Then the next Varsity Chilly Dog umumumumumGOOD!
Go Falcons!
True Falcon Fan
September 14th, 2012
11:27 am
Hey Jim — Sushi is pretty good too
PMC
September 14th, 2012
11:28 am
School Districts operate with Zero Tolerance policies so they don’t have to think. In public education, thinking is the devil.
Therefore if gangs wear the number 18 any child wearing 18 is summarily evil, because again, public school administrators are idiots who are incapable of rational thought.
True Falcon Fan
September 14th, 2012
11:31 am
Oh by the way like i said you have NO idea where he is – do ya re:Woodlawn Cemetery on April 8, 1967 …..Just what i figured – BOTOX mouth 14 D jaws
True Falcon Fan
September 14th, 2012
11:33 am
11:28 Hey ZERO — yep you fit right that one RIGHT
JSS
September 14th, 2012
11:41 am
That “fantasy air” is so silly… Who are you trying to be now, John Calvin? Dude, that kind of stuff is so over your head it is painful reading you feeble attempts at venturing there…
And you missed the boarder issue PMC touched, but hey, off the cliff again!
JSS
September 14th, 2012
11:43 am
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=_d8ROhH3_vs
Splat…
LOL at The Aints
September 14th, 2012
11:52 am
http://youtu.be/QuaojjCV1Tk
True Falcon Fan
September 14th, 2012
11:55 am
ZERO
September 14th, 2012
11:43 am
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=_d8ROhH3_vs
Splat…
Nothing missed in PMC message, you got the point.
Re: YouTube — definitely one of my favorites, I must say couldn’t have done better tussah…
But — You are still a ZERO! And very predictable —- “Man love that roadrunner & coyote” beautiful — good pick
Go Falcons!
HUH?????
September 14th, 2012
12:09 pm
“Stupid, where do you think the KC style of BBQ originated? Oh that is right, Memphis! ”
You’ve just proved yourself a moron, ma’am.
LOL at The Aints
September 14th, 2012
12:15 pm
Hey STB4,,, Just for you little buddy,, http://youtu.be/cI0ZiDb05GU
JSS
September 14th, 2012
12:20 pm
“You’ve just proved yourself a moron”
You do know the difference between “knowing” and the “best” right? Oops, obviously not… Kinda like you don’t know geography or demographics… Keep swinging little slugger, Mr. Perry is somewhere in BBQ heaven laughing his BBQ master butt off at your assertions…
Blake
September 14th, 2012
12:45 pm
I think SeenThisB4 should go blow that tuba…..
Buck Belue says forget the stat sheets on Aaron Murray
September 14th, 2012
1:07 pm
Memphis Bar-B-Q is great; Alabama no so much – now, Georgia has great Bar-B-Q too. We have 6 million people in just this 1 city and I have had great Bar-B-Q here – every bit as good as Memphis. We always have had here in Atlanta. The restaurants in Atlanta alone are far better than anything in the whole state of Alabama. Auburn’s football team was no good last season and no good this season. Cam Newton was a great year. That year was not this year nor last year. You were an unranked football team 2011 and will be again 2012. 48 teams put up 8-win season last season. Yeah, you’re # 48.
Georgie tek is # 36 national university.
Claiming Auburn is # 48 in 2011 and about the same 2012, is like Georgie tek claiming they’re the # 36 national university.
No one runs around claiming they’re # 48 or # 36 at anything – like Mizzou put up an 8-win big xii season 2011 good for # 48 tied with Auburn and Georgie tek.
Mizzou
Auburn
Georgie tek
We’re # 48
We’re # 48
We’re # 48
Those are not football teams. And beating those teams is absolutely NOTHING.
Unless of course, bragging you beat # 48 is what you aspire to as a program – count me out on that.
Bar-B-Q Auburn Georgie tek
SEC Observer
September 14th, 2012
1:09 pm
There are rumors that there are big issues on the Plains. It’s going to get worse before it gets better as Auburn still has to play LSU, Arkansas, Texas A&M, Bama and Georgia.
True Falcon Fan
September 14th, 2012
1:11 pm
I once knew a Perry, in fact met him at Old Hickory House on Piedmont, just 3-4 blocks from the West Bldg Supply store years ago. Can’t be any relation to you? There is certainly no clarity of personality match of you and the Mr Perry, I know this to be fact! This man wouldn’t mistakenly by NO means had reared a moronic idiot of the likes of you! If so yes indeed his dust in a Tornado for sure in the casket…..;)
Ken
September 14th, 2012
1:21 pm
http://news.investors.com/ibd-editorials/091312-625678-press-takes-bias-to-new-extreme.htm
Ken
September 14th, 2012
1:21 pm
http://news.investors.com/ibd-editorials/091312-625678-press-takes-bias-to-new-extreme.htm
Ken
September 14th, 2012
1:21 pm
http://news.investors.com/ibd-editorials/091312-625678-press-takes-bias-to-new-extreme.htm
HUH?????
September 14th, 2012
1:22 pm
“You do know the difference between “knowing” and the “best” right? Oops, obviously not… Kinda like you don’t know geography or demographics”
Poor little fella. Shall I give you a map of the USA to look at? Perhaps some crayons and coloring book?
HUH?????
September 14th, 2012
1:24 pm
“Memphis Bar-B-Q is great; Alabama no so much – now, Georgia has great Bar-B-Q too. We have 6 million people in just this 1 city and I have had great Bar-B-Q here – every bit as good as Memphis.”
Where in GA is there BBQ that is as great as Memphis? I’ve not heard one BBQ fanatic ever say that GA has great BBQ.
BTW, Sonny’s is not real. It’s mass produced garbage. Fat Matt’s is NOTHING. Gimmick.
HUH?????
September 14th, 2012
1:25 pm
“There are rumors that there are big issues on the Plains.
I’ve heard those rumors as well but until something actually happens it’s just what it is. Rumors.
Buck Belue says forget the stat sheets on Aaron Murray
September 14th, 2012
1:26 pm
Auburn knows nothing about college football, Bar-B-Q, Atlanta…
HUH?????
September 14th, 2012
1:30 pm
“Auburn knows nothing about college football, Bar-B-Q, Atlanta”
??????????