Falcons win, Dogs win and Fox is playing human ‘Frogger’
Hello, and welcome back to the world of football, or as Tucker Carlson likes to call it, “Nothing But A League of Thugs and Degenerates and Serial Killers Who Should All Should All Be Thrown Into a Vat Of Face-Melting Acid, Like When Jack Napier Turned Into The Joker On Batman. Except For The Short White Kickers, I Like Those Guys.”
If you missed it, Carlson — fighting for relevancy in the growing mutant world of psychotic political commentators — called for the execution of Michael Vick this week for crimes against past Labradors, never mind the 23 months he already spent in prison and the loss of 27 gazillion dollars. I think it pretty much confirms Vick is not on Carlson’s Fantasy League team.
Personally, I believe Carlson should be sentenced to one game of human “Frogger.” That’s the other unbelievably true story this week: a Clemson man (not Dabo Swinney) thought it would be
For final NFC South standings, start in upper-left and go clockwise.
fun to mimic the video game “Frogger” and try to run across a busy highway without getting tenderized. Seriously, this guy actually yelled, “Go!” and then took off.
It was a short game. He got smacked by an SUV. Somehow, he lived. Obviously he didn’t suffer any brain damage since he already was at base level.
I’m thinking John Fox feels like the frog about now. The Carolina coach knows he’s toast after losing to the Falcons on Sunday. Asked about speculation on his firing, he said: “This is not new news. It’s a finishing. It’s kind of been knowledgeable for a couple years.” Nice to have a two-year warning. Most are lucky to get two weeks.
This week, the Falcons face Fox’s Panthers, who are one bad quarterback short of qualifying for aid from FEMA. The Falcons are trying to close out the NFC South Division title and home field through the playoffs. If they can’t beat this bunch, they should be forced to watch Tucker Carlson diatribes on an endless loop. (OK, maybe not. That would violate the Geneva Convention.)
The line is 14 points. That’s a lot. But there’s pent up anger from the loss to New Orleans. I say: Go! Falcons win and cover.
Here’s John Fox’s video resume the last two years
And just because it’s even more unbelievable the second time, Carlson on Vick
Bowl Parade (Chronologically but Illogically)
(Repeating Liberty and Chick-fil-A picks from a week ago because I had my days off, or maybe my brain.)
The Caleb King: The legend, the myth.
Liberty: Georgia-Central Florida: The Dogs will be without Caleb King, who is academically ineligible, which is a change from him being arrested or suspended or injured (or thinking he’s injured). Dude: When does the light bulb go on? Enjoy four quarters of A.J. Green. Then say goodbye. His jersey hits eBay at about 7 p.m. Friday. Dogs cover 6 ½.
Chick-fil-A: South Carolina-Florida State: Steve Spurrier accepted this bowl bid only after assurances that Cam Newton wouldn’t be in the Dome again. He won’t, but Cecil Newton will be in the parking lot selling Cam’s old shoes. Roosters cover 3.
Outback: Florida-Penn State: I’m less amazed that Joe Paterno, at the age of 84, can still coach 18-year-olds than I am that Hugh Hefner, at the age of 84, can coach 24-year-olds. Say hello to the new Mrs. Hefner: Crystal Harris, Miss December 2009, 34D-25-35-56 (breasts-waist-hips-IQ). Does Paterno take blue pills, too. And speaking of pills, this is Urban Meyer’s last game. Gators win but take Penn State and 7 ½.
Capital One: Alabama-Michigan State: Nick Saban goes from having the best team in the country to the second best team in the state, although I might be shortchanging Troy (which had a better conference record). Tide covers 10.
Hugh surprised Crystal with a ring and 34Ds.
Gator: Mississippi State-Michigan: Dan Mullen leads Mississippi State to the school’s 15th bowl game in 116 years. That should make a dandy final entry on the resume. By the way, how are housing prices in Athens? Other Dogs cover 5.
Orange: Stanford-Virginia Tech: Frank Beamer just won the inaugural Joe Paterno Coach Of The Year Award because there’s no rule prohibiting the winner from losing to James Madison. Take the 3½ but VaTech wins this straight up.
Sugar: Ohio State-Arkansas: Sugar Bowl CEO Paul Hoolahan admits he asked Ohio State not to suspend six players for the bowl game for selling memorabilia because he wanted to “preserve the integrity” of the game.” Integrity? Somebody get that man a dictionary. Take the 3 ½ and Piggies win straight up.
BCS Mondo Enchilada Bowl: Auburn-Oregon: Have you ever seen an Arena League game? Yeah, me neither. But it’ll be kinda like that. The first team to punt loses. And Cam Newton isn’t losing to anybody, let alone to a team called the Ducks. Looking at something like 42-37. Tigers win it all (and cover 3).
NFL Snack Pack
Cowboys at Eagles: Michael Vick lost to Minnesota, which is Latin for, “Take the MVP, Tom Brady, it’s yours.” Eagles cover 6 ½.
Vikings at Lions: If Brett Favre thinks a $50,000 fine for sexting pictures of “Little Brett” to Jenn Sterger is steep, just wait until he gets the bill from his (ex-)wife, Deanna. Detroit covers 3.
Giants at Redskins: Tom Coughlin had his car towed this week after he parked in Bill Cowher’s space. Giants win, but take Washington and 4.
♦
The Toteboard
“In any bet, there is a fool and a thief.” — Proverb
Last week (dreadful): 2-6 straight up, 2-6 against the line.
Bottom line (not dreadful): 134-50 straight up, 96-85-3 against the line.
♦
Sack Schultz
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♦
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567 comments Add your comment
5150 P.O.A.D.
December 31st, 2010
2:10 am
U can’t make
Peachtree doghouse has a hard time explaining that weekend partying with the guys from the Eagle back in the day, then doesn’t he?
JSS
December 31st, 2010
6:22 am
@ POAD…
“Giants should (win) this game (; why is it) even be(ing) played? It should be as Bad as the Falcons beating Carolina.”
Two words might make you want to rethink that statement: “Tom Coughlin!”
JSS
December 31st, 2010
6:53 am
@ Jeff Schultz…
So you found “Popular Pike” (Germantown)? Now, get someone to take you to West Memphis before everything closes for the New Year… Try Roadside… They run out of ribs early!
How They See It: Pundits’ Picks | Atlanta Falcons
December 31st, 2010
8:44 am
[...] an endless loop. (OK, maybe not. That would violate the Geneva Convention.)” -Jeff Schultz, AJC Blog Published 08 secs ago hours ago by Daniel Cox. [...]
Snake Doc
December 31st, 2010
9:12 am
Jeff, anyone who will choke an animal with his bare hands, kill an animal by torture is a step away from a serial killer. Read a book and learn something moron, or is your liberal elitist education to much to overcome. Liberal Arts majors, can’t even write a decent blog or newspaper column.
while MV has every right to rehabilitate himself and work for a living, he is not a person who should be respected, admired or placed upon the pedestal of a hero. Vick’s a scumbag plain and simple!
Falcons win, Dogs win and Fox is playing human ‘Frogger’ – Atlanta Journal Constitution (blog)
December 31st, 2010
9:21 am
[...] the original post: Falcons win, Dogs win and Fox is playing human ‘Frogger’ – Atlanta Journal Constitution (b… a-coach-knows, a-two-year, been-knowledgeable, carolina, coach-knows, couple-years, not-new, [...]
so sad
December 31st, 2010
9:28 am
5150 POAD,
I will give you your sad little moment since your Yech team is beyond pathetic and laughable. If you think the ACC is so great now since UT missed the GAME WINNING extra point and the officials made sure to give UNC every chance in the book, then you go right ahead there little fella.
so sad
December 31st, 2010
9:29 am
And no UGA fan has ever claimed that UGA is better than other teams because they play in the SEC. LOL
To paraphrase so sad
“The same SEC fans, that are really only UGA fans, are going to shamefully try and hang their hats on an SEC team….”
———————————————————-
couldn’t help but notice you didn’t say ACC? Why is that? Because UGA’s ownership of the ACC speaks for itself? Thought so.
Nards
December 31st, 2010
9:32 am
Jeff –
Hasn’t your President been trying to convince us for the past two years that this is the worst shape the economy has been in since the Great Depression? Don’t you think his time could be better spent trying to solve this supposed historic travesty instead of playing golf every day, going on vacation every two weeks and making calls to NFL coaches during the regular season because they happened to play a murderer????? Just a question
Snake Doc
December 31st, 2010
9:45 am
Schultz why don’t you actually use your brain and write an article on the state of sports radio in Atlanta. 3 college bowl games were played yesterday and not one was broadcast by what passes for sports radio in this town.
Oh yeah, you work for one of the feeble attempts at sports radio so you can’t criticize them
Atlanta Sports Radio = A joke!!!!!!!!
quakes
December 31st, 2010
9:46 am
UT is the worst bowl team out there. You know the ACC is down when they get excited about beating them even though UT gave it away, literally
quakes
December 31st, 2010
9:51 am
Ha, don’t get me started on local sports radio. Kincade must have sold his soul to Satan to be on the air. That is the most talentless hack of a sports host I have ever heard.
quakes
December 31st, 2010
9:56 am
Shultz,
It’s not that you “made fun” of a FOX commentator, it’s that you ONLY take your cheap pot shots on righties. This is the most incredibly stupid administration this nation has ever seen and they have given you hours of material, yet you refuse to tackle any of it. That’s called “hypocrisy” incase you didn’t know.
Jeff Schultz
December 31st, 2010
10:03 am
You can’t make this $#@! up — yeah, the whole response was … well, you know.
Jeff Schultz
December 31st, 2010
10:05 am
JSS — Gotta write and not sure if I’ll be heading “out” after that. Bad night and early flight. But thanks for tip.
Jeff Schultz
December 31st, 2010
10:06 am
Snake Doc — Yes, your depth of intelligence and literary skills are coming through clearly.
Nick Fairley scares dawg fans
December 31st, 2010
10:13 am
Good luck at the Liberty Bowl, dawgs! I really do hope you guys win even though you cry like little babies because Nick Fairly destroyed your 6-6 team.
quakes
December 31st, 2010
10:13 am
Ever notice the people that are too weak to take a side always claim to say they vote on both sides, when in reality they are Democrats straight down the ticket? Must be a genetic deformity of some sort…..
haha
December 31st, 2010
10:14 am
Nick Fairley scares dawg fans = Miserable Tech fan
Nick Fairley scares dawg fans
December 31st, 2010
10:14 am
“Yes, your depth of intelligence and literary skills are coming through clearly.”
Jeff, that’s usually what I write about bama and dawg fans.
Nick Fairley scares dawg fans
December 31st, 2010
10:14 am
haha = uneducated, retarded donkey dung.
haha
December 31st, 2010
10:22 am
I love Tech fans that are too ashamed to admit it. Just like ol’ shultzie here that is too ashamed to admit he voted for this current disaster.
JSS
December 31st, 2010
10:55 am
quakes
December 31st, 2010
9:51 am
“Ha, don’t get me started on local sports radio. Kincade must have sold his soul to Satan to be on the air. That is the most talentless hack of a sports host I have ever heard.”
Why would you want to curse Satan like that? That fool has compromising pictures of someone…
5150 P.O.A.D.
December 31st, 2010
11:24 am
haha
If you are so PROUD of the Toilet Paper with the latin on it from UGA, then do you hang it from your review mirror to park in handicap parking spaces?
5150 P.O.A.D.
December 31st, 2010
11:30 am
It is almost noon! Is there a sober dawg fan to be found? It is time to pull down your red panties, paint your butt white, and get your court summons ready to enter the Liberty Bowl Game.
haha
December 31st, 2010
11:31 am
5150 POAD,
You are a miserable Tech fan. Need I say more? LOL
5150 P.O.A.D.
December 31st, 2010
11:44 am
haha
Can you say more? I think all you can do is call people names while hiding behind your computer. I am pretty happy right now. You seem to be the one with hate and anger in your heart and mind.
Maybe you will feel better when the 18-24 year old boys you worship play football today. That seems to be your only joy. You should really not have the play of young men affect your happiness so much.
JSS
December 31st, 2010
11:53 am
New Decade, same ole fight! Happy New Year everybody!
haha
December 31st, 2010
11:58 am
Is that the best you can do? What “names” did I call you? I simply commented on your emotional state, which is obvious to everyone. You are the only one that comes on to the blogs day in and day out attempting to bash a team, school and conference that is heads and shoulders more superior than yours. You attack, insult and bully 24/7 on this thing. The only person with hate in their heart is you. Your posts prove that point time and time again. I pity people like you. So angry and jealous and need to sit behind a computer venting in hopes of giving your life purpose and meaning. Why do you not go outside once in a while and get some fresh air? Maybe even attempt to talk to another human being in real life? This isn’t healthy for you.
I will keep you in my prayers.
Roddy
December 31st, 2010
11:58 am
The anger about the Saintsfrom the falcons is sooooo fake. Just like Matt Ryans mullet.
haha
December 31st, 2010
11:59 am
Roddy,
You brought up the Saints with no mention of Katrina. You know that’s not allowed, right???
5150 P.O.A.D.
December 31st, 2010
12:08 pm
haha
I guess that is like talking about uga and not mentioning drunk fans and arrested football players.
Matt "CHOKE" Ryan
December 31st, 2010
12:13 pm
Can anybody tell me why CHOKE hasn’t won a playoff game yet, while Joe Flacco & Mark Sanchez has and neither of the two has missed the playoffs in their young careers?
Even Sam Bradford is doing more with less.
How can the Sam Bradfords, Joe Flacco’s and Mark Sanchez’ produce with less, while CHOKE has way more pro bowl supporting cast?
That is why he is and will always be a big NOODLE ARM CHOKE
5150 P.O.A.D.
December 31st, 2010
12:20 pm
“Choke” shouldn’t you be sleeping? You need to be rested up for your long night of parting at The Eagle or is it HoeDowns? It is hard to keep up! You say you are a guy then you say you are a girl. I am as confused about your sexuality as you are. Please pick a team and stick with it.
Matt "CHOKE" Ryan
December 31st, 2010
12:24 pm
@P.O.A.D
What does my sexuality have to do with CHOKE being a JOKE
You can't make this $#@! up....
December 31st, 2010
12:26 pm
quakes
December 31st, 2010
10:13 am
Ever notice the people that are too weak to take a side always claim to say they vote on both sides, when in reality they are Democrats straight down the ticket? Must be a genetic deformity of some sort…..
_________________________________________________________________
Decision making at its finest. Pick a side and stick with them through thick and thin – just turn on Glenn Beck to find out how to think.
5150 P.O.A.D.
December 31st, 2010
12:33 pm
I hate preparing the Collard Greens but damn they are so good for New Years day. Cream Corn with Kracklin Cornbread is almost ready too. Hell yes the Ham just went in the smoker. Mouth is watering already. I hate waiting for tomorrow to eat.
5150 P.O.A.D.
December 31st, 2010
12:36 pm
nothing. You have just said you are one sex then the other sex then you haven’t picked a team. I am not sure what you are. you have been keeping us guessing.
Ryan is not a joke. You trying to make him a bad player is funny though.
haha
December 31st, 2010
12:39 pm
See what I mean. You are just filled with anger and misery. Does insulting people while being a faceless stranger over the internet really make you feel like a man? You are a very sad little boy.
Btw, is the rapist coming back for another year or is he finally “graduating?” Have any more bombs gone off or crazy students attacking others with swords occurred again on that joke of a campus you have?
jock
December 31st, 2010
12:42 pm
you can’t make this s*&% up –
When one side is sprinting with us in hand toward full-blown Communism the choices become pretty black and white.
Why don’t you share with us a list of Republicans you’ve voted for to prove to us just how “Independent” you are. Surely you aren’t just another run-of-the-mill, koolaid drinking hypocrite now are you??
jock
December 31st, 2010
12:43 pm
Democrats are the only people that can one day make a very direct, clear-cut statement and then the very next day claim they never said it, even though there is video to prove it. These people have no souls.
Gatorman
December 31st, 2010
12:44 pm
Please, please, please stop writing comments about MVick, he’s Philly’s problem now (nausea caused by watching the 3rd string Viking QB toast them). Atlanta had better be careful with Carolina, smaller dogs have bit the Falcons in the past. Am I the only one that’s noticed a certain running back slowing down and unable to hit his holes quickly (keep name anonymous). I think the Falcons must have a speed back next year to hit the edges, to keep the middle defenders honest.
5150 P.O.A.D.
December 31st, 2010
12:48 pm
haha
that was not angry. it is a valid question. “CHOKE” has stated different times as to their sexuality. A poster ASSUMED CHOKE was a man. Choke said he wasn’t or maybe he was. I was just asking. Not being hateful. Sorry you read it that way. Your prayers are welcome, but I do have some people praying for me that I am pretty sure have a lot more pull than you do. Thanks again for the prayers though.
lance
December 31st, 2010
12:49 pm
hey 5150 CHOAD,
How bout them undersized white boys from Air Force!?!?! LOL!!! You guys are pathetic. Tech should be forced to shutdown their football program and donate their stadium and equipment to GA. State since they will put it to better use.
Finally Atlanta has a real college team they can proudly support for a change.
lance
December 31st, 2010
12:53 pm
Flaco and Sanchez have two of the best defenses in the league, especially in previous years. Ryan’s numbers are far superior than either of those QB’s, so you need to try again.
Why don’t you tell us why you really don’t like Ryan? We all know it has nothing to do with football.
haha
December 31st, 2010
12:54 pm
Maybe “having pull” isn’t the issue, maybe it’s whom they are praying for? Some people are just so rotten to the core that even the big man upstairs stops paying attention, ya know?
5150 P.O.A.D.
December 31st, 2010
12:55 pm
Where is RUSS the Temporary Mascot? Russ please show up today and bring you humor to the UGA v UCF game.
haha
December 31st, 2010
1:00 pm
Such a sad, sad little man. I guess some people really do deserve their misery. You can’t beat UGA in any sport that matters, heck, you can’t even beat Air Force at football. I love knowing you are going to have a miserable new year
5150 P.O.A.D.
December 31st, 2010
1:03 pm
Jeff
I know you at the stadium and will give the injury update when you get set-up, but How is the SPREAD? did they feed you good? Is this UGA game a Locks or Bagel?
Is RUSS looking good? Did they paint his butt for this game? They need to let RUSS win or lose in his own skin color. Will RUSS be 5-4 or 4-5 for his career record?
Nick Fairley scares dawg fans
December 31st, 2010
1:08 pm
“Btw, is the rapist coming back for another year”
Are you referring to the UGA AD who got caught with an underage girl with red panties?