Weekend Predictions: Dogs go down to Gators again
According to legend, or sources close to legend, the origins of Halloween date back over 2000 years when the summer harvest ended and the weather turned cold and the boundary between the worlds of the living and the dead were so narrow that SEC football coaches figured it was safe to start recruiting and NCAA executives and college presidents lounged inside their palatial suites that were paid for by network executives and texted each other, “Time To Close Our Eyes. Hey, are you going to Urban’s pool party later?”
Hello. It’s that time again.
Where are you going this year? St. Simons? Jekyll? Some dark and secluded place, perhaps near the border of the Netherworld, just in case you feel the need to slip into a neighborhood where they don’t get the Georgia-Florida game but still show Lou Holtz career highlights on an endless loop?
It’s the 30th anniversary of Buck Belue to Lindsay Scott. Now let’s advance to more recent decades. The Gators have won 17 of the last 20 meetings. The last two came by a combined score of 90-27, give or take a major organ.
I know. Georgia has the better quarterback. Georgia has the better running game. Georgia has the best player in the game (A.J. Green). Georgia even has the coach who didn’t drop-kick his conscience and morals this week. Florida coach Urban Meyer will bring back Time To Die Guy Chris Rainey. He will hand off to Time To Die Guy. He will throw to Time To Die Guy. I’m guessing he will even wear an wristband with the inspirational initials: “WWTTDGD.”
Should I pull the trigger? (Kidding! It was just a text!)
No. Just can’t do it. Meyer has had an extra week to fix the problems. He is 31-3 in his career when he has had more than a week to prepare. He is 5-0 after bye weeks at Florida.
The Dogs are better than they were three weeks ago. How much? Don’t know. They’ve won consecutive games over Tennessee, Vanderbilt and Kentucky (2-11 in SEC). How do we gauge that? They have lost to the only three teams on their schedule with overall winning records (South Carolina, Arkansas, Mississippi State).
Can’t do it. Seen too much. Seen Dogs fans leave Jacksonville looking like zombies too often.
“Run, Lindsay! … No wait! Come back Lindsay!”
Not seeing is not believing. Until then: Give me the 2½ points. But I won’t need them. Gators, Gators, Gators.
Will it be this (Georgia fans shopping after the game)?
♦
Or will it be this (30 years ago)?
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Is This Gonna Be On The Test?
Oh, geez. And Tennessee thought the Alabama game was tough.
Auburn at Old Ms.: Is this too obvious? Auburn wins a big game against LSU, vaults to the top and becomes the next No. 1 to spill the soup? Almost. I’d probably call upset here if it didn’t mean taking sides with a coach (Houston Nutt) fond of recruiting from penitentiaries for a one-year fix. Tigers win but give me the Rebs and 7.
Tennessee at South Carolina: I understand Derek Dooley is entertaining and well read but he might want to hold off on any more analogies that liken his football team to panicking Nazis when the Allied forces landed on the beaches of Normandy. Better to just mix in a Lane Kiffin joke. Gamecocks cover a big number (17½).
Kentucky at Mississippi State: The note of the year: Dan Mullen (6-2) is bowl eligible before Urban Meyer, Mark Richt, Steve Spurrier and Bobby Petrino. He doesn’t make as much money as the others but there’s that psychic income of living in Starkville. Wait a minute. Other Dogs cover 6½.
Vandy at Arkansas: Ryan Mallett’s first three games: 9 touchdowns, 2 interceptions. Last four games: 6 touchdowns, 5 interceptions. (Sorry for the research. I slipped.) Fortunately, Vanderbilt stinks. Piggies cover 20½.
Georgia St. at South Alabama: South Alabama has won seven games by an average score of 44-7. I guess Tuscaloosa will be a step down for the Panthers. This week, they go down by two TDs.
♦
Pros and Cons
The walking boot is just to get sympathy from his wife.
Sext-Pistols at Patriots: Brett Favre has a bad ankle and doesn’t know if he can play. Seems like a good exit strategy, and it gives him time to work on a new story to tell his wife. Patriots cover 5½.
Jaguars at Cowboys: The really cool thing about those huge video screens in the Cowboys’ $1.3 billion stadium is now you can see Jerry Jones’ head explode in high-def. Hemlock now being served in the martini bars. Dallas wins but take Jacksonville and 6½.
Steelers at Saints: Actually factually: Drew Brees has one less interception (10) than he had all of last season (11), and if he throws four against Cleveland, what’s he going to do against Pittsburgh? The party is winding down in the Quarter. Steelers win (and take the gift 1).
Bucs at Cardinals: Raheem Morris is a good guy but when you say stuff like, “We’re the best team in the NFC. Yeah, I said it,” dude, just go ahead and start chugging the embalming fluid. Arizona covers 3.
Packers at Jets: Rex Ryan said, “It’s hard to say we’re not the best team in the NFL.” When did NFL coaches turn into Ali? Jets cover 6.
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Toteboard
Last week: 8-3 straight up, 7-4 against the line.
Bottom dollars: 65-21 straight up, 46-39-1 against the line.
♦
“Sack Schultz” Update
Went 11-4 last week. Was outdone again. Jack Terrill of St. Johns, Mich., went 15-0. Jack, you using a Ouija board? Overall leader is “Tuckys” (Ohio) at 96-24. “Dgoehner” is top Georgia contender at 95-25. Click here for more info.
♦
Want to catch up on previous Weekend Predictions? Click here.
Want to catch up on Georgia-Florida week posts? Click below
♦ Urban Meyer slammed again for Chris Rainey decision
♦ This is the week Georgia’s defense needs to step up
♦ Dogs’ key to beating Gators: QB, defense or something else?
♦ Early Georgia-Florida primer (and why Meyer is catching heat)
♦
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530 comments Add your comment
Jacksonville Flordia
October 29th, 2010
1:41 pm
Man I cant wait until this weekend is over! The worlds largest outdoor redneck, destructive, loser, party is lame! Not sure why the ugay fans even come. They loose every year. As for the florida fans.. One work “Jorts” enough said.
Hershel
October 29th, 2010
1:42 pm
jerryatric Holla
Jacksonville Chamber Of Commerce
October 29th, 2010
1:42 pm
Ya’ll come back, now, ya heah?
St, Johns River
October 29th, 2010
1:43 pm
Over under on how many gallons of urine I take on this weekend?
CMR
October 29th, 2010
1:44 pm
I’m going to lay down my burden, down by the riverside, down by the riverside. I ain’t gonna study football no more, I aint gonna study football no more.
Chris Rainey
October 29th, 2010
1:44 pm
St Johns I got a present for you.. I sent her a text message so she knows its coming
Jacsonville Hotels
October 29th, 2010
1:49 pm
Dang it why did we do those renovations before this game???????????
St. Johns River
October 29th, 2010
1:50 pm
You folks really P*I*S*S me off
Ed
October 29th, 2010
1:50 pm
Ahh, the Nerds are out in full force. Must be Georgia- Florida week, time for Tech fans to live vicariously through another school.
ED ED ED
October 29th, 2010
1:51 pm
Try living in the present, not the past. You are sad, Ed, real sad.
Camera Guy
October 29th, 2010
1:53 pm
Ed, I’ve checked the archives and there is no other angle of the one and only play you remember. Living in the past is good, huh Ed?
5150 P.O.A.D
October 29th, 2010
1:55 pm
ED don’t blame us. UGA fans have been on the Tech Blogs and we don’t even play until Thursday.
Ed
October 29th, 2010
1:57 pm
Q: What is a Tech fan’s favorite song?
A: Georgia On My Mind
Ed
October 29th, 2010
1:58 pm
“Try living in the present, not the past. You are sad, Ed, real sad.”
You’re right, I repent. Is last November recent enough for you?
gdawginkalamazoo
October 29th, 2010
2:00 pm
5150 POAD,
Tech has a blog? Where? What do you guys talk about? Star Wars? Star Trek? What a woman might feel like? Do you coordinate your tickle piles on there?
Delta Flight Attendent
October 29th, 2010
2:01 pm
Wow we sure were serving a lot of drinks to players and coaches on the Dawg Charter to JAX. Well at least none of the players or coaches will be driving in Jacksonville.
Tech Alum
October 29th, 2010
2:09 pm
Easy, gdawginkalamazoo, I attended Georgia Tech for 4 years and know at least 3 guys who have a rough idea what a woman feels like. A heavily sedated, immobile woman perhaps, but technically a live female nonetheless. Back off, dude.
gdawginkalamazoo
October 29th, 2010
2:18 pm
Tech Alum, LMAO! You could play football for Florida. But only after a bunch of felonious verbal threats.
RED GATOR
October 29th, 2010
2:26 pm
It doesnt bother me that Rainey is playing this weekend. “Dawg” fans are so nieve about their program, they haven’t done $^*t for 3 decades. Dawgs gotta get rid of Richt.
Tru Dawg
October 29th, 2010
2:30 pm
I love The DAWGS. Roof, Roof Roof. We gonna be barkin all nite in jacksunvile. com un dawgs. I told my sister/cuzin we was goin to chere all nite long. Im prod to b a gorga grad.
gorga grad–nin tee ninter nin
Oh
October 29th, 2010
2:30 pm
Dee Doo Dah Day.
Mikey Boo Boo
October 29th, 2010
2:31 pm
Alright guys, let’s make this game over quick. I have to get home and make another baby.
Elvis
October 29th, 2010
2:33 pm
Warden threw a party in the county jail, Georgia band was there they began to wail.
Hey Ed
October 29th, 2010
2:34 pm
Did you know that Belue and Lindsey scored a 98 yard TD in the last seconds in 1980 to beat Florida? I can find some film for you if you like.
Delta Flight Attendent
October 29th, 2010
2:38 pm
Nice to know the dawg fans trash other places as bad as their own campus. St. Simons Beach is the UGA dump too. Damn don’t you people have any class? You people are just pigs no matter where you go.
#1 Georgia Fan
October 29th, 2010
2:49 pm
I luvs goink 2 dis game cauz day haf indoor plummin. It shore iz nice to p*e*e inside fur a change
Hey Ed
October 29th, 2010
2:50 pm
Herschel and Lindsey don’t play any more. You know that, right?
King Gator
October 29th, 2010
3:38 pm
AD of Univ. of Georgia $600k, BMW $50k, Bar Tab $300, UGA Red Thong $23 … getting a DUI in Buckhead with a younger alum who’s not your wife and her red thong panties in your lap .. PRICELESS! (well except for getting fired and divorced) Go Gators!
5150 P.O.A.D
October 29th, 2010
4:11 pm
King Gator Damon is still married and living up north near his in-laws. He has a new job too. So Far the mistake he made has not ended his life if that is what you were hoping for. He made a mistake and lost a lot for it, but he is still doing fine.
Ed in East Point
October 29th, 2010
4:18 pm
Dawgs die a slow, painful death in Jax, 45-24.
Ed
October 29th, 2010
4:19 pm
“Tech Alum, LMAO! You could play football for Florida. But only after a bunch of felonious verbal threats.”
Felonious behavior at Florida is not tolerated, unless you are a starter who runs a 4.3 forty. Or there’s a big game coming up. Or UF is thin at a certain position. Or the opposing coach showed you up 3 years ago and you’ve held a grudge ever since. Or Tim Tebow is gone and someone else has to make a play. Or you’re afraid that not playing a certain player could hurt your team’s chances, which could cause you stress, which could lead to chest pains and early retirement.
Otherwise, there’s ZERO TOLERANCE for bad behavior at UF.
Gen Neyland
October 29th, 2010
4:20 pm
zoodawg : LMAO, but I hear CDD will drop Luxembourg and pick up the Philippines (away) as a tribute to his pals in Japan…Only a rumor at this point…
Oxy Clean
October 29th, 2010
4:20 pm
All of you UGAers get your heads out of the sand or wherever you have them
stuck and start worrying about the number one problem with UGA. At the rate
your athlete-thugs are being arrested, you’ll be lucky to have any football team by the end of the season.
UGA has made the state a laughingstock with its reputation as one big party
school with copious job opportunities for bail bondsman, and decent people are fed up with this. Get rid of the illiterate, undisciplined drunks and felons that Mark Richt recruits, and get rid of Richt too. Even with these illiterate jerkoffs, he can’t even win the division, much less the SEC, so what’s the point.
Ed
October 29th, 2010
4:26 pm
Will Chris Rainey’s ankle bracelet be removed before the game? And does his parole officer know about his upcoming trip to Jax? So many things for Urban to ponder on the eve of the WLOCP.
Tebro
October 29th, 2010
4:40 pm
Q: What is a Dawg fan’s favorite song?
A: Jailhouse Rock
5150 P.O.A.D
October 29th, 2010
5:02 pm
ED
Chris Rainey is staying in the state. The better question is how mny of UGA players probation officers got 2 free tickets to the game just to say the players could leave the state.
Schultz for Brains
October 29th, 2010
5:11 pm
right where you belong. Aligned with your gators.
GATA !
jeffreyh
October 29th, 2010
5:59 pm
Coaches and AD’s will Never crack on their own Criminals… Who do ya think Recruited these guys headed for thebighouse.. They couldn’t care less until they are finally held Accountable. nothing but prep ground. Lavish free health clubs for the meatheads.
Yellow Fuzz
October 29th, 2010
6:21 pm
I’m in jax for the beat down (3rd year in a row). Already seen 100 embarrassing, drunk and obnoxious dogs. One just got col cokked by a Gator fan-hahahahaha. He’s laying in some shrubs outside the stadium. hahaha. no kidding. Anybody want me to do a play-by-play here during the game tomorrow?
Yellow Fuzz
October 29th, 2010
6:29 pm
Dogs beat Tennessee, Vanderbilt and Kentucky (combined 2-11 in SEC).
Dogs lost to South Carolina, Arkansas, Mississippi State (the only three teams on their schedule with overall winning records).
Too late. The Koolaid has already been poured!
TampaGator
October 29th, 2010
6:45 pm
Just talked to my brother in Gainesville just before I leave to go there …the talk on Sports Radio in Gainesville is that Steve Addazio was stripped of both his OC and OL duties this week (and is on the outs with Meyer) and that Meyer will be calling the plays for the Gators on Saturday with help from the offensive WR coach (who was very successful at W. Michigan with the spread passing game with a pro style QB) in the press box…the way it should have been all year. This is not good news for Georgia….and great news for all Florida fans. Now…on the way to Blue and Orange land. Win or lose….I will be on here Sunday…to either take my deserved lumps and to hand out some….see ya in Jax!!
Ed
October 29th, 2010
6:51 pm
Yellow Fuzz, if you witnessed an assault it is your duty to report it to the police. The description part should be easy: Man in his 20s, blue or orange shirt, jean shorts, shades, bleached-blond mullet, flip-flops, starter mustache, Natural Light in one hand, Marlboro in the other, loud, drunk…
Oh, wait a minute. That won’t help narrow it down much. Never mind.
5150 P.O.A.D
October 29th, 2010
6:58 pm
ED
That sounds a great deal like fans of both schools. Why would he report the assult to police? If a drunk gets his butt handed to him as a fan of either team they deserved it.
Yellow Fuzz
October 29th, 2010
7:05 pm
Weekend Predictions: Dogs go down on Gators again
Ed
October 29th, 2010
7:17 pm
It looks like an even matchup to me. That usually means a Florida win because they have the mental edge. But Georgia has a big quarterback edge. Dawgs 24-21.
5150 P.O.A.D
October 29th, 2010
7:21 pm
ED
Don’t hit your wife. Just take her PBR and put her to beat.
Yellow Fuzz
October 29th, 2010
7:22 pm
Ed
Actually, the first description was more like Man in his 40s, khaki pants, red shirt (before bleeding), broken shades, balding hair, penny loafers, graying mustache, Spilt Jack & Coke in one hand, 1980 game program in the other, loud, barking drunk, with wife picking fight with the Gator that decked him…
Yellow Fuzz
October 29th, 2010
7:25 pm
Ed,
The guy in the 2nd altercation looked like Bill King. No kidding. It wasn;t him but the guy looked just like him. Hahahahaha. He’s sitting up but he hasn’t moved much at all the last 30 minutes.
Ed
October 29th, 2010
7:26 pm
That’s called projection, 5150 P.O.A.D.
Relax. I’ve read quite a few posts from you and when you get frustrated, you just get stupid.
Put her to “beat?” You spell about as well as your pal Yellow Fuzz.
Fuzz, if you’re still out there. Is “col cokked” Finnish or just a mangled attempt at writing “cold cocked”?
picassokat
October 29th, 2010
7:27 pm
These comments are freakin hilarious. Schultzie picked Gators to beat Dogs and many act as though he shot your dogs. He’s a great sports writer. He’s doing his job. Dogs will win because of Murray and special teams (UF has no FG kicker) End of story.
GO DOGS!!! GATA!!!