Weekend Predictions: Even Vegas is down on Dogs

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Occasionally, we here at Weekend Predictions, home of the world’s only 100 percent guaranteed financial projections, assuming you didn’t fall for one of those silly picks we just put out there for comic relief, bring in a consultant.

So let me introduce you to my new market analyst, Todd Fuhrman, race and sports book analyst at Caesars Palace in Las Vegas, where I once helped fund a significant expansion. I phoned Todd because Georgia opened this week as an underdog to Mississippi State, which is somewhat like the Ukraine opening as an underdog to Lichtenstein. These Dogs haven’t lost to those Dogs since 1974 (1951 in Starkville, when bread was 16 cents. Starkville looked the same, though.).

Trust me. I have a system.

Trust me. I have a system.

Todd’s research goes back only 20 years but  he’s never seen Georgia less than 3 1/2 point favorites. Why is Mississippi State favored?

“It’s tough to get behind Georgia,” he said. “Their passing game is stagnant without A.J. Green, their freshman quarterback has played well in spurts but he’s inconsistent and I think a lot of people were surprised how they came out against Arkansas.”

Can you offer any other tips?

“Sure.”

Where’s the best buffet?

“We have a 24-hour buffet with unlimited access for $45.”

Should I split 10’s?

“It depends what the dealer is showing, but why not?”

Red or black?

“Always black.”

Over/under on Cher’s age?

“Low 60s.”

Back to the game. Georgia opened as 2-point dogs on one line. It has since moved to pick ‘em. Momentum!

If they lose this, you’ll never see another Georgia win predicted in this disturbed corner of the universe.

Athens Dogs win in Starkville.

Devoted reader and commenter “Ted Striker” suggests this strategy might help Georgia ends its 0-2 slump in the SEC.

Faber College

(Where Knowledge is Good)

Meet Gaylord the Camel, mascot (and possibly athletic director) at Campbell.

Gaylord the Camel: He's representin'.

North C. State at North Ave.: Al Groh’s defense rebounded nicely in Chapel Hill. Now the trick is not turning back into Dave Wommack. The Wolfpack has scored 106 points in three games, including eight touchdown passes by QB Russell Wilson. OMG, research. What’s gotten into me? Tech wins but take State and 8 ½.

The G at Campbell: The Panthers hung with Jacksonville State last week. Impressive. Now they face the Fighting Camels of Campbell. Shockingly, a school with “Gaylord the Camel” as its mascot does not award athletic scholarships. Either that or they offer them and everybody just laughs. State by 3, say I.

Alabama at Arkansas:The Pigfaces are 3-0 and ranked No. 10. Ever have one those perfect days and then somebody drops a piano out the window? Arkansas: Don’t look up. Bama covers 7.

South Carolina at Auburn: Gene Chizik said his team needs to be more physical. The last time I heard a coach say that, Mark Richt’s team was getting drilled in Columbia. Take the gift 3 but Chickens win this straight up.

Kentucky at Florida: HBO’s Bryant Gumbel thinks the NCAA should put the Gators on probation for all of their arrests, reasoning: “I’m no legal expert, not by a long shot, but I do believe that driving drunk, robbing a convenience store, and hitting your girlfriend are all worse offenses than dealing with an agent.” I think I suddenly like Bryant Gumbel. Do I need a shot? Gators cover 14.

NFL Snack Pack

Year's over, Drew. Put the trophy down.

Year's over, Drew. You can put the trophy down now.

Falcons at Saints: The Falcons’ defense goes from facing Dennis Dixon and Derek Anderson to Drew Brees. But the Saints are coming off a short week and they just lost Reggie Bush, who has a broken leg to go with his fractured conscience. I have no idea why I’m doing this: Take the 4 but the Falcons win in an upset.

Eagles at Jaguars: Michael Vick is a starter again. The Philadelphia Daily News was so excited that it ran the headline, “Top Dog,” which I guess was a cute play on words, assuming you weren’t one of Bad Newz Kennels’ failed low-round draft picks. Fetch: Eagles cover 3.

Stooges at Dolphins: The New York Jets have devolved from reality show to a Three Stooges episode, when the gun powder accidentally falls into the pancake batter (oh Curly, not again). This week, Braylon Edwards was arrested for driving with twice the legal limit of alcohol and half the legal minimum for brains. Rex Ryan, a walking F-bomb on TV, suddenly says he’s tired of the drama. Seriously? Miami covers 2 ½.

Don't worry, Wade. Jerry's very patient.

Don't worry, Wade. Jerry's very patient.

Cowboys at Texans: Dallas is 0-2 after going 11-5 last year. It’s the Wade Phillips Market Correction. Phillips still has a chance to pass his father, Bum, in career coaching victories but at this point he’ll be happy with return airfare as a gift. Wrap this: Dallas wins on the road (but take the 3 points).

Lions at Vikings: Minnesota is 0-2 and Brett Favre doesn’t have any receivers. How long before he suddenly says he can’t play through the ankle pain any more? Just sayin’. Vikes win but take Detroit and 11.

Braylon Edwards gets pulled over for DUI. (I could watch this 1,000 times, and probably have.)

Dept. of Hindsight

Last week: 10-1 straight up, 5-6 against the line.

Bottom dollars: 26-6 straight up, 17-14-1 against the line.

Lock of the week: Deadbolt.

LogoGrass_652173aSACK SCHULTZ: Dude, this contest is like totally ruining my street cred. Went 10-5 last week. At 31-14 overall. Two guys named Ills (Georgia) and Axmann (Wisconsin) lead at 39-6. I’m pretty sure they’re cheating. If you haven’t played, it’s not too late too humiliate me! Click here for details and then here to enter.

Follow me on Twitter @JeffSchultzAJC and Facebook.com/JeffSchultzAJC

291 comments Add your comment

SatchelBuzz

September 23rd, 2010
1:55 pm

Go Jackets,..Sine Metu!

THWG!!

PMC

September 23rd, 2010
2:05 pm

Oh how I love the sports book at the MGM.

DawginLex

September 23rd, 2010
2:07 pm

UGA 28 MSU 20
Gt 38 NCSU 33
Ark 21 Bama 20
Florida 34 UK 24
Lsu 28 WV 24

Tom Pridemore was tuff

September 23rd, 2010
2:11 pm

Steve knows his rights….that was hilarious…I agree with all of you picks except 1 (and I’m ahead of you in sack Schultz, but you’re about to go off I’m sure) I think Arkansas beats Alabama….Baama is due for a stinker and the Pigs can’t be stopped on offense…

Hollywould

September 23rd, 2010
2:13 pm

Auburn, Georgia, bama, florida, lsu all win. Put it on a parlay.

Jeff Schultz

September 23rd, 2010
2:15 pm

PMC — Can’t go wrong with Caesars or Mirage, either.

Jeff Schultz

September 23rd, 2010
2:16 pm

DawginLex — I’m with you on all but but one. I don’t see Arkansas holding Alabama to 20 without running the ball, and I don’t think they can do that.

GStateBen

September 23rd, 2010
2:20 pm

Thanks Jeff! Ready to take on the Creek and the fightin’ Two Humps.

G-A S-T-A-T-E.

Keith

September 23rd, 2010
2:22 pm

Jeff,

We agree on the Falcons. This is the best time to catch the Saints off-guard. It will be close, but I like the Birds on Sunday. :)

DooleyNoted

September 23rd, 2010
2:27 pm

Interesting how you say Bama will cover the line but you won’t pick a winner. Come on Jeff, have some kahunas.

Dog lost

September 23rd, 2010
2:27 pm

Keep taking those mutts. Eventually you’ll be right. Just not this week.
0-3

toga

September 23rd, 2010
2:28 pm

People betting 80/20 on Georgia, classic trap bet. Vegas cleans up on this one. How else can you afford to have a $45 unlimited buffet. State in a shocker.

Line Judge

September 23rd, 2010
2:31 pm

MSU 27, UGA 24

Dawgs go 0-3, and the fans will be screaming for Mark Richt’s head. Richt will reply “Let ‘em eat cake. Or red panties, whichever they prefer.”

doggyboy

September 23rd, 2010
2:35 pm

The love for the chickens ends abruptly for SC (east) this Saturday. Garcia is still aliability for them and will make key mistakes in key points in the game. On the road that’ll kill ‘em.

bruce mac

September 23rd, 2010
2:36 pm

WHY WHY WHY? Do you hate us Jeff? Please pick the other DOGS, it is not too late to change your mind. You are never right and besides that we are bad bad bad.

Spanky

September 23rd, 2010
2:37 pm

Toga, you must NOT have seen the LSU-Miss. Sate game! Georgia has a lot to prove right now, and they very much know it! I think the perverbial light goes off in Starkville. Our Dawgs win by 10. Book-em Dann-o!

Oh well

September 23rd, 2010
2:39 pm

I don’t see Auburn losing to the chickens simply because Auburn owns SC just like they own ClemPson.

Prediction: Bama puts Mallett in the hospital.

St. Richt

September 23rd, 2010
2:39 pm

DawginLex, I usually don’t agree with you but your picks are pretty good except for 1. Alabama will destroy Arkansas- it will be over in the 1st quarter.

Oh well

September 23rd, 2010
2:40 pm

“Bama covers 3.”

I guess you haven’t watched any Bama games this year.

fishtales

September 23rd, 2010
2:40 pm

Your buddy at Caesars must be giving you the opening line because it’s been at 7 most of the week.

Bellagio sportsbook is my home away from home.

Tech Tony

September 23rd, 2010
2:40 pm

Georgia wins over Mississippi State: nobody likes a Bully.

Georgia Tech wins, doesn’t cover: as much as I wish it was so, I don’t think Tech’s defense has improved yet; I think it was more a matter of the offense’s 10+ minute drive that got the Heels out of rhythm.

Georgia State wins too: for once it’s OK to smoke Camels.

Bama wins: Arky’s inability to run the ball gets it in trouble.

Gamecocks win: I can’t imagine Auburn bouncing back so quickly from such an emotional and physical game.

Florida wins: Bobby Rainey (Western Kentucky, 5th in the nation in rushing) lit up the Cats for 184 yards. No reason to think the Gators won’t have success on the ground either.

Falcons over Saints: not only did Nawlins play Monday it also spent a day flying home again. Saints won’t be prepared for a change.

Other NFL winners: Dolphins, Cowboys and Vikings.

Wagers of the week: NCAA-Kansas State -7 over UCF; NFL-Dallas +3 over Houston

MURPHY

September 23rd, 2010
2:41 pm

Schultz,

Great job as usual. On the Campbell thing. My son went there for a recruiting visit early in the process. Great school.Just brought football back a couple years ago. Good coaching staff-Head coach is brother to the Clemson d-coordinator.Ex UGA coach and ex Florida coaches on staff. They only give achedemic scholarships. Georgia State should handle them pretty well.

Line Judge

September 23rd, 2010
2:43 pm

I wish I could wear my red panties for all those sexy men

Dr M

September 23rd, 2010
2:44 pm

Same ole UGA

September 23rd, 2010
2:45 pm

http://pricezack.wordpress.com/2010/09/21/are-bulldog-fans-realistic-or-optimistic-going-forward-in-2010/

The link I posted is a pretty interesting read. Very realistic until the writer got a little dreamy at the end. Good article.

Melinda

September 23rd, 2010
2:46 pm

Ugh. I liked our chances until you picked us to win. NCST is gonna beat us.

Destin Dawg

September 23rd, 2010
2:46 pm

I don’t see how they could come out so flat and predictable on offense in early season losses….after a bad season.. last year…. I thought Grantham , Belin, and Lakatos.. would FIRE UP the whole ( Richt ) coaching staff…. get those fat ass OL moving… its now or never for me …. Go Dawgs ?????

How the dogs have fallen

September 23rd, 2010
2:46 pm

Lsu just beat them 29-7 and the mutts are a 1 point underDAWG.
Haha. The perennial crap of the sec is only favored by a point. Welcome to the bottom rednecks

WonderDawg

September 23rd, 2010
2:48 pm

“Even Vegas is down on Dogs”
***************************
When it rains, it pours . . .

WonderDawg

September 23rd, 2010
2:50 pm

How the dogs have fallen,

Actually, when we can’t beat Tech 9 out of 10 anymore, that will be the bottom.

Howard

September 23rd, 2010
2:50 pm

Jeff…you were too subdued in your comments this week…esp. with Petrino vs. Saban (talk about two weasels.) Do you think Saban would go to Cowboys like a SI writer postulated the other day?? Campbell College…I’ve been there…”beautiful” downtown Buies Creek in the middle of nowhere (think a smaller version of Starkville) The school is quaint and their stadium is nice but with no lights. Oh well, a school with no scholarships…what’d you expect? GSU wins by 35 points. Finally…have to ask you…have you caught Phil Fulmer on those football pre-game and halftime shows? The guy has more trouble reading a teleprompter than Obama has away from a teleprompter.

Chuck Sheen

September 23rd, 2010
2:51 pm

I’ve seen no finer looking football team than Bama. Take the points and buy yourself some scotch and hookers. You’re welcome, Chuck

Dawg House

September 23rd, 2010
2:53 pm

Dawgs- 34 Dogs- 17

Buncha Wolves- 28 Bees- 19

Gene

September 23rd, 2010
2:53 pm

A couple of years ago, Steve was riding his lawnmower to get some beer because his wife was “going to stab him in the face.” He got tased on that trip when he ppd on the cop. Maybe this cop needs to go to work in Athens. A taser would have more effect on Richt’s drunk drivers than suspension from LA Lafayette an a wink from the coach.

Sonny Clusters

September 23rd, 2010
2:53 pm

Let Gaylord the Camel play left field, Bobby.

Denver Dawg

September 23rd, 2010
2:55 pm

wow – if Ted Striker says it, then it must be true!

MCGARITY GET RID OF RICHT IF HE CANT BEAT FLORIDA THIS YEAR

September 23rd, 2010
2:58 pm

REDNECKS THIS CLASSIC KARMA! PRICELESS!

Dawg House

September 23rd, 2010
3:04 pm

Sometimes I wish I were a Saints fan, so I could pretend like I was french and add an “x” to words that clearly do not require an “x”.

I would also love to ask the most annoying, grammatically incorrect question “Who Dat?” over, and over, and over, and over again.

Boy, that would be swell.

DawginLex

September 23rd, 2010
3:07 pm

I’ve just got a hunch on Arkansas.

I’m also thinking that we aren’t as bad as everyone says.

My wife also still believes I only weigh 220…………………..

Old Dawg

September 23rd, 2010
3:08 pm

I’m pulling for Auburn so they take the SC State Championship with wins over Clemmons and the Chickens. What a recruiting tool that is – not!

jp

September 23rd, 2010
3:14 pm

you just cannot stand arkansas and petrino. the puppies got showed up by a talented offense last weekend and you just cannot stand it. you and everybody else needs to get over petrino. yeah, it sucks what bobby did but that was like 3 years ago, he did the falcons a favor in leaving. you want to know what reality is? look at your puppies, 1-2 and 0-2 in SEC play, thats reality and the schedule doesnt get any easier. but if they win you will say its not good enough because they didnt win by 50. and if they lose, boy, yall will just tear them a new one.

DawginLex

September 23rd, 2010
3:16 pm

gotta pull for Aubie this weekend. 1st of four losses for the chickens?

aubie
Bama
Arkansas
florida

florida could lose to

UK(probably not)
LSU
Bama
UGA
FSU

Is the SEC East still wide open? Answers provided in Starkville(according to Ricky 15 seconds Pitino-the armpit of the south)

Miss St or Uga...can't tell the diff.

September 23rd, 2010
3:18 pm

Ark.
Aub.
M St.
Falcons

Peter

September 23rd, 2010
3:18 pm

I think I suddenly like Bryant Gumbel. Do I need a shot?

Hit him with your wallet Bryant.

Dutch

September 23rd, 2010
3:21 pm

THREE? Bama covers THREE? 3?

Where in the HELL is that the line? I want all over that?

Vegas says Bama must cover 7 to win $$$.

Three? That’s funny.

GTBob

September 23rd, 2010
3:24 pm

I like the Falcons, UGA, GT, and Bama to all cover.

Splitting 10’s is just crazy talk though.

MURPHY

September 23rd, 2010
3:25 pm

Dutch,

I will give the pigs 10 !! Bama will roll sat. Like I said before: Mallet welcome to the college football version of the NFL

gdawginkalamazoo

September 23rd, 2010
3:28 pm

Please people what did you expect? I think 8-4, 7-5 would be considered a realistic season this year. We have a new D scheme that doesn’t quite have the correct players in it yet. We played tough and with a lot of heart so far. Our O has been a challenge but not because of the players. Murray has done the best he can so far which is pretty good considering the plays they are calling.

Jeez, take a breth, calm down.

juvenal

September 23rd, 2010
3:31 pm

worry more when Tech’s favored…

Destin Dawg

September 23rd, 2010
3:35 pm

I know we gave up 2@ days in camp… do we have a strength & conditiong coach ????