Predictions: Big win for Tech, big losses for Georgia, PETA
A Massachusetts woman this week posted an ad on Craigslist seeking donations so that she could pay for her turkey’s eye surgery, which one of my professors back in Interpretive Journalism would say almost certainly indicates she doesn’t hold stock in Butterball, there’s no government option for poultry either, and at least one five-star recruit of the lunatic fringe managed to elude PETA.
Hello, and Happy Thanksgiving to all those at the top of the food chain. This would not include Lyndsey Medeiros or her pet turkey Jerry or PETA, which this week issued a news release that began, “Thanksgiving can be the scariest time of the year if you’re a turkey. More than 45 million of these fascinating birds are killed to disgrace Thanksgiving tables each year.”
"I can't see! I can't see!"
Let me just say this: If turkeys had a choice, they’d be blasting our heads off, slapping us fascinating creatures on a platter next to the stuffing and yelling at their TV sets, “Why do I have to watch the Lions again!” That would be except for the one turkey seeking corrective lenses for her pet human, Jerry.
PETA has had a busy week. You probably read that the organization wants Georgia to replace the late Uga VII with an animatronic dog or a costumed mascot, because apparently a real bulldog’s heart just can’t take it. Dudes, have you seen this team? No species can take it. It wasn’t an asteroid that caused the extinction of dinosaurs, it was a Willie Martinez game plan.
It’s about to get worse. The Dogs had a better team last season when Georgia Tech rang up 45 points. Losing to Kentucky doesn’t project improvement. Real research: 26 turnovers have led to 102 opponent points.
Maybe it’s catatacts? No matter. It’ll be a Tech feast. Jackets cover 7.
“Grab a Brew. Don’t cost nothin’”
(Combo meal: add fries and copy of “Winning plays by Charlie Weis,” now in wallet size.)
I figure Auburn has no chance so fans deserve a chuckle. Thanks to Wizard of Odds blogsite.
Alabama at Auburn: Tommy Tuberville lost to Alabama last year after thumping the Tide six straight years, so you can understand the booster pea-brains wanting to dump him because, well, it had been four years since he went undefeated. Strap in Tigers: It’s going to be a long bumpy ride with Nick Saban in Tuscaloosa. Bammy covers 10 1/2.
FSU at Florida: With rumors circulating about the shuttle to South Bend, Urban Meyer told Gator Nation this week, “I’ll stay as long as they’ll have me.” Either that’s a clip-and-save moment for when he does leave or everybody in Athens just said, “Oy.” Florida covers 24 1/2.
Notre Dame at Stanford: The point spread on this game has jumped from 5 1/2 to 10 1/2. That happens only in cases of plague, locusts or Charlie Weis. Is it possible to relish a face plant any more than this? Cardinal covers the number.
Clemson at South Carolina: I know: There’s no stopping C.J. Spiller. I know: South Carolina hasn’t won a game of significance since Mississippi two months ago. But I still see, “Steve Spurrier vs. Dabo Swinney,” and think, “Tilt.” Poultry Payback! Gamecocks in an upset (but take the 3).
Arkansas at LSU: Bobby Petrino has won two straight SEC games. Stop the madness: Tigers cover 3 1/2 vs. Piggies.
Pros and Ex-Cons
Just getting ready in case the Falcons blow this.
Sick Bay at Falcons: The Buccaneers are 1-9, fired their defensive coordinator this week and their offensive coordinator 10 days before the season. If Falcons blow this, they might as well get lost in the self-help section at Barnes & Noble. Injury update: Coach Mike Smith lists everybody from the Hundred Years’ War as day-to-day, keeping within NFL policy. Falcons cover 12.
Patriots at Saints: The Saints (10-0) are trying to do what the Patriots did two years ago — the 16-0 part, not the choke-away-the-Super-Bowl-that-forced-me-to-live-out-of-a-cardboard-box-part. Actual factual: Tom Brady has five straight games over 300 yards. Take the 3, but New England wins this straight up.
Bears at Vikings: Brett Favre was 22 for 25 with four touchdowns last week against Seattle. If you wondered what it would take to make his season even better, the answer was Jim Mora’s defense. Vikes cover 10 1/2.
If football teams were restaurants, this is Buffalo.
Redskins at Eagles: The Skins are still missing running back Clinton Portis, who has a concussion. Portis says he is suffering from blurred vision and has seen six or seven doctors. Or maybe it was three or four. Philly wins but take Washington and 9 1/2.
Dolphins at Bills: Bill Cowher, Jon Gruden and Mike Holmgren have said no, so now Buffalo is pursuing Mike Shanahan. I guess it’s commendable that the Bills want to shoot for the top in their coaching hire. But isn’t this sort of like “Steak ‘n Shake” trying to lure a chef from “Bones?” Dolphins cover 3 on the road.
Accounting Dept.
Last week (we won!): 9-2 straight up, 7-4 against the line.
So far, so feh: 92-40 straight up, 63-68 against the line.
WHATEVER YOU’RE THINKING, I SAW THAT COMING. JUST CLICK HERE FOR PROOF
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502 comments Add your comment
Paddy
November 26th, 2009
9:23 pm
Dawg Central….the only score that counts in any year is the last score. Comparing leagues and individual games is worthless. If we can’t beat CPJ and Tech this year then they are the better team, period! No amount of rationalization will change that fact. We must WIN this game!
pilgrim
November 26th, 2009
9:54 pm
10-1 and hasn’t done anything yet.
6-5 and has done everything before.
Take your pick.
Maybelle
November 26th, 2009
9:59 pm
This will be ugly, really really ugly.
Tech 52, UGAy 17. The Beatdown of the century. They’ll be talking about this game fifty years from now.
And the ugly mutt won’t be there. Dawg gone.
Wishbone
November 26th, 2009
10:02 pm
Did Michael Vick ever get near Uga VII?
I’m just sayin’…
pilgrim
November 26th, 2009
10:13 pm
Ode to “if.”
If we can stop the stupid penalties.
If we can stop the turnovers.
If we can play 60 minutes.
If we can settle on a uniform.
If we can get a new D co-ordinator.
If we can tackle.
If we can coach up our five star recruits.
If Notre Dame would hire Paul Johnson.
AWJ
November 26th, 2009
10:13 pm
I think the DAWGS come out with some heat. This one will be close. Don’t know who will win by GT better not overlook UGA, or they will get their butts kicked.
AWJ
November 26th, 2009
10:14 pm
but GT
GT all the way
November 26th, 2009
10:28 pm
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=E8GuH9oDHrU
jesse james
November 26th, 2009
10:33 pm
I am sick and tired of watching kids celebrate after TD’s and nothing called. McCoy nearly went in the stands, no flag, and #8 from A&M scored and dropped th ball on the Texas defender,no flag. I would like to look the official that cost UGA the LSU game in the face and ask him to explain that to me.
Atl Resident
November 26th, 2009
10:53 pm
At least those nerds got the offense to win the shootout Sat. night. They will probably end up getting the last laugh having UGA looking like the fools.
doubledawghater
November 27th, 2009
2:28 am
Jesse—-Go $hit in your hat
DDDAWG
November 27th, 2009
2:44 am
pi$$onaDawg must be the biggest loser in history. my god.
Keith Folds
November 27th, 2009
4:09 am
Showing your true colors, Jeff. The DawgNation will remember this when this short aberration is over and things are back the way God intended them to be. May the ghost of UGA VII inhabit your dreams.
Alabama Jack
November 27th, 2009
6:45 am
If Gawd had intended for the dawgs to win, he wouldn”t have made them so ugly – and their menfolk ain’t much either.
Yellow Fuzz
November 27th, 2009
7:30 am
……………………….georgia = Tech’s bitch for the last 364 days!!!!
…………………..georgia = Tech’s bitch for the last 364 days!!!!!
………………..georgia = Tech’s bitch for the last 364 days!!!!!
…………..…georgia = Tech’s bitch for the last 364 days!!!!!
………..….georgia = Tech’s bitch for the last 364 days!!!!
…….. ..georgia = Tech’s bitch for the last 364 days!!!!
…..……georgia = Tech’s bitch for the last 364 days!!!
…….georgia = Tech’s bitch for the last 364 days!!!!!!!
……..georgia = Tech’s bitch for the last 364 days!!!!!!!!
……..georgia = Tech’s bitch for the last 364 days!!!!!!!!!!
……….georgia = Tech’s bitch for the last 364 days!!!!!!!!!!
………..georgia = Tech’s bitch for the last 364 days!!!!!!!!!!!
…………georgia = Tech’s bitch for the last 364 days!!!!!!!!!!!!
………….georgia = Tech’s bitch for the last 364 days!!!!!!!!!!!!!
…………..georgia = Tech’s bitch for the last 364 days!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
……………georgia = Tech’s bitch for the last 364 days!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
……………georgia = Tech’s bitch for the last 364 days!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
…………….georgia = Tech’s bitch for the last 364 days!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
……………..georgia = Tech’s bitch for the last 364 days!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
………………georgia = Tech’s bitch for the last 364 days!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
……………….georgia = Tech’s bitch for the last 364 days!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
………………georgia = Tech’s bitch for the last 364 days!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
……………georgia = Tech’s bitch for the last 364 days!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
…………georgia = Tech’s bitch for the last 364 days!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
………georgia = Tech’s bitch for the last 364 days!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
……georgia = Tech’s bitch for the last 364 days!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
…georgia = Tech’s bitch for the last 364 days!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
georgia = Tech’s bitch for the last 364 days!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
georgia = Tech’s bitch for the last 364 days!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
.georgia = Tech’s bitch for the last 364 days!!!!!!!!!!!!!
..georgia = Tech’s bitch for the last 364 days!!!!!!!!!!
…georgia = Tech’s bitch for the last 364 days!!!!!!!!
….georgia = Tech’s bitch for the last 364 days!!!!!!
…..georgia = Tech’s bitch for the last 364 days!!!
……georgia = Tech’s bitch for the last 364 days!
HoCoJo
November 27th, 2009
7:42 am
The only way for GA to score points will be through interceptions, and Tech doesn’t throught the ball very often.
Yellow Fuzz
November 27th, 2009
8:13 am
364 days ago today
By the time Roddy Jones finished tightroping his way down Georgia’s sideline, the dog nation had been put in their rightful place from pre-season national champion to real-season state runner up.
There were many big plays in Georgia Tech’s 45-42 victory over georgia (Tech’s new bitch) at Sanford Stadium (Tech’s home away from home) last season. But none was bigger than Jones’ 54-yard, game-winning touchdown run with 7 minutes, 13 seconds remaining.
Cheers ring out every time the run is played on Tech’s scoreboard during games. There are more than a dozen versions of it on Youtube.com that have been watched more than 40,000 times. http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=WLlAAkUYZ1Y
It capped a comeback from a 28-12 halftime deficit (that’s 16 points if you are a Georgia fan). It came with a little more than 7 minutes remaining and really put an exclamation mark on a third quarter beat down/fourth quarter bitch slapping that has silenced all but the rabid azzholes of the dog nation for an entire year.
From one flag boy to another..
November 27th, 2009
8:17 am
the booger eatin nerds are warming up their chess sets, putting on their studly little gayry looking yellow wigs and getting ready to sing their monkey grinder tech fight song..buzzzzzz, buzzzzz, see you in between the slums tomorrow at 8 p.m. at grunt Stadium, dodd blue boy field…nesbitt and company will choke all over the bogus #7 ranking and order will be restored in the state after the fluke a year ago
this game means the world to tech!!!!
November 27th, 2009
8:20 am
i bet the choking jackets are wondering about now if Georgia is better or worse than mighty Wake Forest…trust us bugs, the dawgs will show up and the insects will choke…it rarely has happened …two fluke wins in a row by tech…i am just saying!!!
F-105 Thunderchief
November 27th, 2009
8:28 am
Michael Turner back from high anke sprain in a week? Jerious Norwood still on life support six weeks after a hip pointer.
Yellow Fuzz
November 27th, 2009
8:43 am
Sending georgia to the Papa John Bowl in Hoover Alabama = PRICELESS
………………………………Papa John bowl < # 9 from SEC!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
……………………………Papa John bowl < # 9 from SEC!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
………………………..Papa John bowl < # 9 from SEC!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
…………………….Papa John bowl < # 9 from SEC!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
…………………Papa John bowl < # 9 from SEC!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
……………..Papa John bowl < # 9 from SEC!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
………….Papa John bowl < # 9 from SEC!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
………Papa John bowl < # 9 from SEC!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
….Papa John bowl < # 9 from SEC!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
……..Papa John bowl < # 9 from SEC!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
…………Papa John bowl < # 9 from SEC!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
…………..Papa John bowl < # 9 from SEC!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
………………Papa John bowl < # 9 from SEC!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
………………….Papa John bowl < # 9 from SEC!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
……………………..Papa John bowl < # 9 from SEC!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
…………………………Papa John bowl < # 9 from SEC!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
…………………………….Papa John bowl < # 9 from SEC!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
………………………………….Papa John bowl < # 9 from SEC!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
“Look at the sausage falling from the sky”!
Large Orange
November 27th, 2009
8:47 am
@Yellow Fuzz……”Sending georgia to the Papa John Bowl in Hoover Alabama = PRICELESS” I LOVE IT! Can I get some extra cheese with that sausage falling from the sky? Tech steamrolls the LegHumpers on Saturday!
GT Jim
November 27th, 2009
8:51 am
LOL. I can’t wait! Let’s get ready to RAMBLE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
GT Stinger
November 27th, 2009
8:52 am
Choke on this dawgs!
CrimeDawg
November 27th, 2009
9:11 am
Watch out GT, UGA will come out and play with as much passion, fire and life as that dead turkey had on my table yesterday based on the way they have played so far this year. At least the turkey died a quick death when we chopped his head off and he did not know that he was on the dinner menu like UGA is. Much better than being eaten alive! GT, Please have some mercy on UGA since its the holiday season and finish them off quick like we did the turkey, just chop their heads off, shove the stuffing up their butts, roast and enjoy instead of doing it slowly like torture since I can’t take much more of this.
Acworth Dawg
November 27th, 2009
9:30 am
Hey Yellow Fuzz,
I hope YOU have enjoyed YOUR fun in the sun for these last “364 days”. The fun in the sun that YOU were never able to obtain as a Gailey recruited player at Tech (”LOL”).
The world will be righted tomorrow night and YOU (“and I hope you can hear me”), will be put in YOUR “rightful place” (door mat “bitch” for the DAWG NATION to wipe their feet (and “AZZ”) on.
YOU deserve the beat down YOU have coming and I hope YOU hold true to YOUR word that YOU “will never post on these AJC blogs again”.
Looking forward to seeing YOU STFU!
Yellow Fuzz
November 27th, 2009
9:49 am
When the going gets tough, dog fans leave the stadium!
GTSteve
November 27th, 2009
9:50 am
No way Tech chokes….CPJ will not allow that
GTSteve
November 27th, 2009
9:56 am
Mike Oxbig
October 23rd, 2009
5:55 pm
The Dawgs will not lose for the rest of the season. The Gaytor game won’t even be close and the nerds won’t know what hit them. The Dawgs are the real class of the SEC, the best conference in the land. Go DAWGS!!
anybody seen this guy recently???????????????????????????
Barbara Dooly...........for Congress
November 27th, 2009
9:59 am
How much is a Greyhound bus ticket to Shreveport?
Are the Dawgs staying at the Red Roof or the Days Inn?
Slim Pickens
November 27th, 2009
10:00 am
Enter your comments here
M Lassiter
November 27th, 2009
10:30 am
Who Dat?
GT Rules State
November 27th, 2009
10:52 am
another unrealistic UGAyer
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=fyVd4dqfT-8
gtfanfrom1951
November 27th, 2009
11:25 am
the best thing for last year is that dawg fans have been silent for a year….maybe two…or three…more but their not as bad clemson fans.
Judge Jagaloon
November 27th, 2009
11:26 am
Vol Nation, Lame supports his player that is kind of good. Give us all a break, do you not understand that if he were at Florida he would have gotten a severe 1/2 game suspension. Come on, man. give us a break. Ghosts of Justin Smiley come to mind.
Judge Jagaloon
November 27th, 2009
11:29 am
Yellow Fizz, what is the deal with you, m, and Ramble On. You give all of humanity a black eye. Do all of you blog in your stepfathers basement?
BOOGIES THE MAN FROM HARTWELL GA
November 27th, 2009
12:07 pm
TO YELLOW FU$$…………. AT LEAST WE GO TO THE STADIUM…………. SEE YOU GOT YOUR CHRISTMAS PRESENT EARLY FROM AUNT E.M………..A RETARDED ETCHA-SKETCH…………
Duke
November 27th, 2009
12:28 pm
Pi$$onadawg is a typical bitter Tech fan who is angry about being so unattractive.
BOOGIES THE MAN FROM HARTWELL GA
November 27th, 2009
12:36 pm
YACKETS…………….Y A C K E T S……………..YEAH UNTIL 11 PM TOM. NIGHT
Duke
November 27th, 2009
1:17 pm
Tech fans are ugly people….it hurts to look in the mirror….God made you that way, so just accept it and get back to your Dungeons and Dragons game.
UGA Blog Sunday November 29, 2009
November 27th, 2009
1:42 pm
UGA Blog – Sunday November 29, 2009
UGA Grad – The refs cost us the game
Athens Al – Joe Cox cost us the game
Dawg in Bama – Next year National Champs
Willie Martinez – Tough year fans and I will see you on the sideline next year
Herschel Talker – We were really 9-3 this year
Saint Simons – (38-17) hahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahaha
Barack Obama – Under my plan of a cap and trade system electricity rates would skyrocket
Mark Richt – Thanks for the 3 million for a 6-6 season
King Gator – 23 wins in a row and looking for more, send some gift baskets down in admiration
Dawg in denial – The Gators are done after this year and won’t compete in the East anymore.
Green with envy Dawg – Gator fans wear jorts
Dawg Gone Dawg – uh, we still lead in the overall series against Tech
20 year old Dawg – Come on Dawgs get it together, I have only seen 3 wins against the Gators
Aaron Murray – I will have not played in a game in almost two years come 2010 kickoff
Zach Mettenberger – I’m getting bored sitting on the sideline, 11 months and no games
Logan Gray – I’ve been catching punts and throwing to Gator linebackers but I’m ready
BOOGIES THE MAN FROM HARTWELL GA
November 27th, 2009
1:45 pm
UGA BLOG………… STUPID AS HELL
BOOGIES THE MAN FROM HARTWELL GA
November 27th, 2009
2:05 pm
GOTTA GO=== SEE YOU @SS-HATS TOMORROW !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! GO DAWGS
Chumbly
November 27th, 2009
2:30 pm
Oh… I forgot, you dawgs like sniffing and rolling in that kind of stuff.
Wishbone
November 27th, 2009
2:37 pm
“Uga VII’s five-year-old half brother, Russ, will fill in as the Georgia football team’s bulldog mascot at Saturday night’s game against Georgia Tech.”
This stupid mutt will croak just like Uga VII did when he’s stung in the butt by a swarm of yellow jackets.
Georgia Tech 52, UGA 17. Count on it and watch with glee as the UGA fans run from the stadium by halftime. Hope they take the mangy, flea-bitten mutt with them.
Marya
November 27th, 2009
2:42 pm
Looks like the UGA bloggers have already prepared all their excuses. That makes sense, so they won’t have to stay up late Saturday night coming up with them.
The biggest and most plausible excuse: Mark Richt. You have our deepest sympathies, but please keep him forever. Please. Really.
Sounds from the past
November 27th, 2009
3:11 pm
John Heisman, Head Coach of Georgia Tech, 1904-1919, Won 100 games, lost 28, tied 6. Opening day of practice each season he would describe a football like this, holding the football up in front of the players: He would ask, “What is it?” Before anyone could answer he would say, “A prolate spheriod. That is, an elongated sphere in which the outer leathern casing is drawn tightly over a somewhat smaller rubber tubing.” Then, glaring at the players and speaking in an very serious tone of voice he would add,”Better to have died as a small boy than to fumble it.”
GTSteve
November 27th, 2009
3:53 pm
Go Jackets
Jeff Schultz
November 27th, 2009
4:37 pm
Thanks Paul. … PETA realizes nothing. A bunch of idiots.
Jeff Schultz
November 27th, 2009
4:38 pm
Cuttysark — I can take the hits.