Predictions: Big win for Tech, big losses for Georgia, PETA
A Massachusetts woman this week posted an ad on Craigslist seeking donations so that she could pay for her turkey’s eye surgery, which one of my professors back in Interpretive Journalism would say almost certainly indicates she doesn’t hold stock in Butterball, there’s no government option for poultry either, and at least one five-star recruit of the lunatic fringe managed to elude PETA.
Hello, and Happy Thanksgiving to all those at the top of the food chain. This would not include Lyndsey Medeiros or her pet turkey Jerry or PETA, which this week issued a news release that began, “Thanksgiving can be the scariest time of the year if you’re a turkey. More than 45 million of these fascinating birds are killed to disgrace Thanksgiving tables each year.”
"I can't see! I can't see!"
Let me just say this: If turkeys had a choice, they’d be blasting our heads off, slapping us fascinating creatures on a platter next to the stuffing and yelling at their TV sets, “Why do I have to watch the Lions again!” That would be except for the one turkey seeking corrective lenses for her pet human, Jerry.
PETA has had a busy week. You probably read that the organization wants Georgia to replace the late Uga VII with an animatronic dog or a costumed mascot, because apparently a real bulldog’s heart just can’t take it. Dudes, have you seen this team? No species can take it. It wasn’t an asteroid that caused the extinction of dinosaurs, it was a Willie Martinez game plan.
It’s about to get worse. The Dogs had a better team last season when Georgia Tech rang up 45 points. Losing to Kentucky doesn’t project improvement. Real research: 26 turnovers have led to 102 opponent points.
Maybe it’s catatacts? No matter. It’ll be a Tech feast. Jackets cover 7.
“Grab a Brew. Don’t cost nothin’”
(Combo meal: add fries and copy of “Winning plays by Charlie Weis,” now in wallet size.)
I figure Auburn has no chance so fans deserve a chuckle. Thanks to Wizard of Odds blogsite.
Alabama at Auburn: Tommy Tuberville lost to Alabama last year after thumping the Tide six straight years, so you can understand the booster pea-brains wanting to dump him because, well, it had been four years since he went undefeated. Strap in Tigers: It’s going to be a long bumpy ride with Nick Saban in Tuscaloosa. Bammy covers 10 1/2.
FSU at Florida: With rumors circulating about the shuttle to South Bend, Urban Meyer told Gator Nation this week, “I’ll stay as long as they’ll have me.” Either that’s a clip-and-save moment for when he does leave or everybody in Athens just said, “Oy.” Florida covers 24 1/2.
Notre Dame at Stanford: The point spread on this game has jumped from 5 1/2 to 10 1/2. That happens only in cases of plague, locusts or Charlie Weis. Is it possible to relish a face plant any more than this? Cardinal covers the number.
Clemson at South Carolina: I know: There’s no stopping C.J. Spiller. I know: South Carolina hasn’t won a game of significance since Mississippi two months ago. But I still see, “Steve Spurrier vs. Dabo Swinney,” and think, “Tilt.” Poultry Payback! Gamecocks in an upset (but take the 3).
Arkansas at LSU: Bobby Petrino has won two straight SEC games. Stop the madness: Tigers cover 3 1/2 vs. Piggies.
Pros and Ex-Cons
Just getting ready in case the Falcons blow this.
Sick Bay at Falcons: The Buccaneers are 1-9, fired their defensive coordinator this week and their offensive coordinator 10 days before the season. If Falcons blow this, they might as well get lost in the self-help section at Barnes & Noble. Injury update: Coach Mike Smith lists everybody from the Hundred Years’ War as day-to-day, keeping within NFL policy. Falcons cover 12.
Patriots at Saints: The Saints (10-0) are trying to do what the Patriots did two years ago — the 16-0 part, not the choke-away-the-Super-Bowl-that-forced-me-to-live-out-of-a-cardboard-box-part. Actual factual: Tom Brady has five straight games over 300 yards. Take the 3, but New England wins this straight up.
Bears at Vikings: Brett Favre was 22 for 25 with four touchdowns last week against Seattle. If you wondered what it would take to make his season even better, the answer was Jim Mora’s defense. Vikes cover 10 1/2.
If football teams were restaurants, this is Buffalo.
Redskins at Eagles: The Skins are still missing running back Clinton Portis, who has a concussion. Portis says he is suffering from blurred vision and has seen six or seven doctors. Or maybe it was three or four. Philly wins but take Washington and 9 1/2.
Dolphins at Bills: Bill Cowher, Jon Gruden and Mike Holmgren have said no, so now Buffalo is pursuing Mike Shanahan. I guess it’s commendable that the Bills want to shoot for the top in their coaching hire. But isn’t this sort of like “Steak ‘n Shake” trying to lure a chef from “Bones?” Dolphins cover 3 on the road.
Accounting Dept.
Last week (we won!): 9-2 straight up, 7-4 against the line.
So far, so feh: 92-40 straight up, 63-68 against the line.
WHATEVER YOU’RE THINKING, I SAW THAT COMING. JUST CLICK HERE FOR PROOF
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502 comments Add your comment
BOOGIES THE MAN FROM HARTWELL GA
November 26th, 2009
2:23 pm
GO DAWGS
dawg149
November 26th, 2009
3:15 pm
Red Dog 77 nuff said. Anyone in the Dawg Nation calling for Richt’s head needs to hit the road. He will bring us back……..and soon!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
GT Rules State
November 26th, 2009
3:45 pm
Checking in on Booger … worried about you. Just don’t have a gun around Sat night.
Lila
November 26th, 2009
3:48 pm
Big beatdown coming, and the only advice I can give to UGA fans is BOHICA!
First your dog croaked, then your team choked, and now Georgia Tech is about to apply the coup de gras. Or perhaps you would enjoy the feel of hobnail boots in your face.
HA! HA! HA! HA! HA!
BEAT my 10-1 CHEST
November 26th, 2009
3:59 pm
GO JACKETS
10-1
November 26th, 2009
4:00 pm
TO HELL WITH GEORGIA
RECIEVER WATCH
November 26th, 2009
4:02 pm
Number 8 THOMAS is a better reciever than Green
Lila
November 26th, 2009
4:12 pm
Getting some second-hand (maybe third-hand) reports that Damon Evans may consider sacking Richt if UGA loses to Tech and whatever bowl game UGA goes to.
I hope Richt stays at UGA. He’s the best friend other teams have!
Lila
November 26th, 2009
4:15 pm
Let’s call it Georgia Tech 49, UGA 24. Tech easily covers the spread.
That will make Tech 11-1 and UGA 6-6, which is fne and dandy. UGA will go to the Toilet Bowl and end with a 6-7 record, which should guarantee that Richt will be fired.
THE truth
November 26th, 2009
4:17 pm
RICHT is very SAFE
rumors suck
November 26th, 2009
4:19 pm
Mark Richt is a very good coach
having a bad year
just like the best of em
Maybelle
November 26th, 2009
4:19 pm
Americus Jacket said: “I’ve had to endure the past few years hearing how great Richt is. I’m glad to hear he was actually an idiot.”
I think everyone now acknowledges that Richt is an idiot.
Slim Pickens
November 26th, 2009
4:21 pm
………………Nesbitt for Heisman
RAMBLIN WRECK is tuned up
November 26th, 2009
4:47 pm
16 interceptions
no back-up QB
6-5
………COME ON MAN
Ronnie
November 26th, 2009
5:06 pm
………….there you go again
GT all the way
November 26th, 2009
5:51 pm
yes Americus Jacket ,
I agree with you. And look out for those on these post that pretend to be neutral or friendy foes, it is b.s. like Paddy for instance. That dog isn’t the truth of anything. There use to be East Cobb Hokie that pretended to be some innocent bystander and all the time he was going in for the kill, haven’t heard from him since the GT – VT game. Friendly fire is still fire. Do not be deceived.
Nesbitt good for 28 yards rushing in 14 carries
November 26th, 2009
6:49 pm
28 yards on 14 carriers against Miami, that’s all ya’ got Nesbitt? What, 2 yards a carry?
I could FALL DOWN for 2 yards.
gratefuldawghead
November 26th, 2009
6:51 pm
UPSET Alert DAWGS 35 Bees 21
Paul Johnson to Notre Dame !
GO DAWGS!
Dwyer goes for 7 yards on 5 carries
November 26th, 2009
6:53 pm
Dwyer is a HUGE threat with that triple option. He averaged less than Nesbitt against Miami. What is that? 1.4yards a carry?
I could STRETCH my arms for 1.4 yards.
Yeah Jeff, I see why Georgia will lose against this AMAZING running game High School Offense 1 trick pony express.
.....Thunder Road
November 26th, 2009
7:03 pm
Paul Johnson will teach The Bobo and Willie Show
a few things.
beasy31
November 26th, 2009
7:04 pm
time to piss on uga’s doghouse
Saint Mary
November 26th, 2009
7:09 pm
Joe Cox will turn purple again from all those hits come Saturday night.
TUCK FECK
November 26th, 2009
7:10 pm
Burn in Hell beasy31!!!!!
Barbara Dooly for Congress
November 26th, 2009
7:12 pm
Shereveport is the arm-pit of all bowl games.
Mr. Charlie Weis
November 26th, 2009
7:16 pm
6-5
is bad
real bad
FLA DAWG
November 26th, 2009
7:31 pm
Expectations are high for GT.
This game should not even be a close one.
Why only a 7 point spread?
Maybe Martinez will have The D play for 4 Qtrs!
(Naw, that’s WAY too much to expect)
It would be hilarious if GT lost this one though.
timmy
November 26th, 2009
8:01 pm
It would be hilarious if FSU beats Urban and his thugs
Willie Is Fire Proof with a Win
November 26th, 2009
8:02 pm
If Willie succeeds in shutting down BOTH Aubrn’s dual threat offensive genius AND Johnson’s 1 trick pony express, his job is absolutely safe.
Richt will realize 4 of the 5 losses came when Bobo’s O gave up 3-4 TO’s. Willie’s D has yet to give up a single 100 yard rusher this season. Normally, Richt wins 93% of those games.
1 more win Willie–shut the critics up, just like you did in the Hawaii game.
WILLIE WONKA DEFENSE
November 26th, 2009
8:06 pm
That gimmick Willie is a joke
WILLIE WONKA DEFENSE
November 26th, 2009
8:08 pm
KFC
……..
KENTUCKY FRIED COX
Bobo's Job is Safe with a Win
November 26th, 2009
8:13 pm
Bobo has had a tough year. 4 of the 5 losses were games where the O gave up 3 or 4 TO’s.
If Bobo plays a TO free game, he will absolutely keep his job.
And the dream of becoming a head coach somewday will stay alive.
If he coughs up 3 or 4 more TO’s for the 5th time this year, it ain’t lookin good for Bobo.
Come on Bobo, show us what ya got. You were practically error free as a QB in college, bring back the mojo baby. Just a 1 game. Make Tech remember ever bad word said about you.
GT Rules State
November 26th, 2009
8:18 pm
UGA got a lotta smack going on … Sat night boys, hit the blog during 4th when GT has racked up 40 pts and double UGAy’s TOP. Gonna be ugly for Richt & I hate it … cause I actually lke the guy and what he stands for.
Richt is Hard to Beat
November 26th, 2009
8:18 pm
Richt’s teams are so well prepared, that he needs to realize people are GAMEPLANNNING TO BEAT HIM WITH TURNOVERS.
That’s their only hope of winning. NOBODY has EVER beaten Richt when he hasn’t runed the ball over. He can’t be beaten straight up, so they try to win like Florida did, with gimmicks.
Tech will gameplan for turnovers. Richt needs to find an answer—FAST!
If Richt can counteract the TURNOVER GAMEPLAN everybody has used to beat Georgia, he wins against Tech.
Richt, people are now GAMEPLANNNING FOR TO’s to try and squek out a win. That’s how good you are Bro. They KNOW they have NO CHANCE to win without turnovers.
Don’t beat yourself again.
otis
November 26th, 2009
8:19 pm
the only way kirby smart will ever leave BAMA is for a head coachs job not to be the DC at puppy land. please dont be so dumb.
GT Smackdown in the House
November 26th, 2009
8:23 pm
Remember the LSU game Tech?
Haaaaaa haaaaaa haaaaaaaa!
Thomas
November 26th, 2009
8:24 pm
A&M beating Texas early. Would love to see an upset and cause more chaos to the BcS
Gerry
November 26th, 2009
8:26 pm
Remember the GT game Ga? Or the Ok state game? Or the Fla game? Or the Lsu game? Or the Tennessee game? How about that Kentucky game?
Haha–losers
Tom
November 26th, 2009
8:30 pm
Miami Game Flashback–
Dwyer, 7 yards on 5 carries, Nesbitt, 24 yards on 12 carries.
Haaa haaa haaaaa
Urban Meyers to Notre Dame
November 26th, 2009
8:33 pm
I still can’t believe he did it! But really, without Tebow, can you blame him, after all, he is Catholic, and was named after a Pope, and coached there with Holtz, and called it his dream job.
Get ready for 6-5 every year Meyers at Notre Dame without Tebow you HAVE 0 nATL’ cHAMPS.
If you think 6-5 is bad....
November 26th, 2009
8:36 pm
Paterno went 3-9, and 4-7 in 2003 and 2004.
Dawg Central
November 26th, 2009
8:38 pm
When Paul “Double Chin” Johnson has a record like Mark Richt playing with the big boys….then we will start some comparisons……but as of now….there isn’t a comparison….Johnson has done absolutely nothing while coaching the big boys….Tech’s opponents have a combines record of 58wins and 54 losses…..if Tech had played UGA’s schedule they would be 7-4 right now….losses to Okie St., LSU, Florida and Tennessee. And Gerry…..do u remember the Miami game…..hahahahahaha
Dwyer gets 7 yards on 5 carries
November 26th, 2009
8:41 pm
My grandma could get 7 yards……7 yards….you can’t be serious?
UGA Stinger
November 26th, 2009
8:43 pm
PETA IS WORRIED THAT GT GOING TO ABUSE THE DAWGS WITH A TERRIBLE BEATING
BIRDDAWGONE
November 26th, 2009
8:44 pm
ah the memories
1993: UGA 43, Tech 10
1994: UGA 48, Tech 10
1995: UGA 18, Tech 17
1996: UGA 19, Tech 10
1997: UGA 27, Tech 24
1998: Tech 21, UGA 19
1999: Tech 51, UGA 48 (OT)
2000: Tech 27, UGA 15
2001: UGA 31, Tech 17
2002: UGA 51, Tech 7
2003: UGA 34, Tech 17
2004: UGA 19, Tech 13
2005: UGA 14, Tech 7
2006: UGA 15, Tech 12
2007: UGA 31, Tech 17
2008: Tech 45, UGA 42
GT Rules State
November 26th, 2009
8:48 pm
Dumb@$$ UGAyers … GT’s got the rushing and receiving #’s that trumps the mutts terribly. Gonna be a long night. Bring it back on the blog in the 4th on Sat night and we’ll see who is still around. You guys are gong to get smacked around for your worst beating of the year. Can’t wait … gonna be hilarious losers!
GT Rules State
November 26th, 2009
8:53 pm
BIRD DAWG GONE … enjoy the past. Only as good as your last one dude .. any athlete realizes that. Gone gone gone are those days!!!! (laughing) You guys can’t even recruit kids who can stay out of trouble.
Americus Jacket
November 26th, 2009
8:58 pm
Hey, I have a harmone issue.
Oh, and I forgot about the guy who compared UGA VII to his kids when complaining about the low brow humor being said about the dog. Is it just me or does that guy need to take football a little less seriously? I mean the things said about the young men and coaches on both sides have really offended me at times — but it’s not until one side goes after a dog that people get really offended?
I will say that I am sorry UGA VII had a heart attack, but really, wouldn’t it have been funny if he had had it when UGA pitched on the 1/2 yard line against Kentucky. (I apologize in advance to the guy who thought of the dog as much as his kids.)
BIRDDAWGONE
November 26th, 2009
9:01 pm
GT wishes they Ruled the State:
I guess your right, history never repeats its self. No team has ever won a National Championship if one of their players get a traffic ticket.
UGA Stinger
November 26th, 2009
9:10 pm
THIS GOES FOR THAT DUMB @$$ THAT PUT THE SCORES OF UGA-GT GAMES YA SURE I MEAN YALL WON & EVERYTHING BUT THOSE ARE JUST MEMORIES ON A SHELF & THATS ALL THEY’LL EVER BE BUT IF YOU WANT TO BRING UP THE PAST REMEMBER LAST YEAR’S GAME WHAT WAS THE SCORE?………. OH I KNOW UGA 42 GT 45 YA SO STICK THAT IN YOUR MOUTH & SUCK ON IT
GT Rules State
November 26th, 2009
9:15 pm
Birdgoner … who owns the most recent trophy? Funny hearing from someone who hasn’t been to dance in over 3 decades. Loser