Predictions: Big win for Tech, big losses for Georgia, PETA
A Massachusetts woman this week posted an ad on Craigslist seeking donations so that she could pay for her turkey’s eye surgery, which one of my professors back in Interpretive Journalism would say almost certainly indicates she doesn’t hold stock in Butterball, there’s no government option for poultry either, and at least one five-star recruit of the lunatic fringe managed to elude PETA.
Hello, and Happy Thanksgiving to all those at the top of the food chain. This would not include Lyndsey Medeiros or her pet turkey Jerry or PETA, which this week issued a news release that began, “Thanksgiving can be the scariest time of the year if you’re a turkey. More than 45 million of these fascinating birds are killed to disgrace Thanksgiving tables each year.”
"I can't see! I can't see!"
Let me just say this: If turkeys had a choice, they’d be blasting our heads off, slapping us fascinating creatures on a platter next to the stuffing and yelling at their TV sets, “Why do I have to watch the Lions again!” That would be except for the one turkey seeking corrective lenses for her pet human, Jerry.
PETA has had a busy week. You probably read that the organization wants Georgia to replace the late Uga VII with an animatronic dog or a costumed mascot, because apparently a real bulldog’s heart just can’t take it. Dudes, have you seen this team? No species can take it. It wasn’t an asteroid that caused the extinction of dinosaurs, it was a Willie Martinez game plan.
It’s about to get worse. The Dogs had a better team last season when Georgia Tech rang up 45 points. Losing to Kentucky doesn’t project improvement. Real research: 26 turnovers have led to 102 opponent points.
Maybe it’s catatacts? No matter. It’ll be a Tech feast. Jackets cover 7.
“Grab a Brew. Don’t cost nothin’”
(Combo meal: add fries and copy of “Winning plays by Charlie Weis,” now in wallet size.)
I figure Auburn has no chance so fans deserve a chuckle. Thanks to Wizard of Odds blogsite.
Alabama at Auburn: Tommy Tuberville lost to Alabama last year after thumping the Tide six straight years, so you can understand the booster pea-brains wanting to dump him because, well, it had been four years since he went undefeated. Strap in Tigers: It’s going to be a long bumpy ride with Nick Saban in Tuscaloosa. Bammy covers 10 1/2.
FSU at Florida: With rumors circulating about the shuttle to South Bend, Urban Meyer told Gator Nation this week, “I’ll stay as long as they’ll have me.” Either that’s a clip-and-save moment for when he does leave or everybody in Athens just said, “Oy.” Florida covers 24 1/2.
Notre Dame at Stanford: The point spread on this game has jumped from 5 1/2 to 10 1/2. That happens only in cases of plague, locusts or Charlie Weis. Is it possible to relish a face plant any more than this? Cardinal covers the number.
Clemson at South Carolina: I know: There’s no stopping C.J. Spiller. I know: South Carolina hasn’t won a game of significance since Mississippi two months ago. But I still see, “Steve Spurrier vs. Dabo Swinney,” and think, “Tilt.” Poultry Payback! Gamecocks in an upset (but take the 3).
Arkansas at LSU: Bobby Petrino has won two straight SEC games. Stop the madness: Tigers cover 3 1/2 vs. Piggies.
Pros and Ex-Cons
Just getting ready in case the Falcons blow this.
Sick Bay at Falcons: The Buccaneers are 1-9, fired their defensive coordinator this week and their offensive coordinator 10 days before the season. If Falcons blow this, they might as well get lost in the self-help section at Barnes & Noble. Injury update: Coach Mike Smith lists everybody from the Hundred Years’ War as day-to-day, keeping within NFL policy. Falcons cover 12.
Patriots at Saints: The Saints (10-0) are trying to do what the Patriots did two years ago — the 16-0 part, not the choke-away-the-Super-Bowl-that-forced-me-to-live-out-of-a-cardboard-box-part. Actual factual: Tom Brady has five straight games over 300 yards. Take the 3, but New England wins this straight up.
Bears at Vikings: Brett Favre was 22 for 25 with four touchdowns last week against Seattle. If you wondered what it would take to make his season even better, the answer was Jim Mora’s defense. Vikes cover 10 1/2.
If football teams were restaurants, this is Buffalo.
Redskins at Eagles: The Skins are still missing running back Clinton Portis, who has a concussion. Portis says he is suffering from blurred vision and has seen six or seven doctors. Or maybe it was three or four. Philly wins but take Washington and 9 1/2.
Dolphins at Bills: Bill Cowher, Jon Gruden and Mike Holmgren have said no, so now Buffalo is pursuing Mike Shanahan. I guess it’s commendable that the Bills want to shoot for the top in their coaching hire. But isn’t this sort of like “Steak ‘n Shake” trying to lure a chef from “Bones?” Dolphins cover 3 on the road.
Accounting Dept.
Last week (we won!): 9-2 straight up, 7-4 against the line.
So far, so feh: 92-40 straight up, 63-68 against the line.
WHATEVER YOU’RE THINKING, I SAW THAT COMING. JUST CLICK HERE FOR PROOF
Tell us what you think about the site
Customer Care »
Vacation stops, manage subscriptions and more
AJC Services
Sections
Other Editions
Visitor Agreement | Privacy Statement
© 2013 The Atlanta Journal-Constitution
502 comments Add your comment
Pi$$onaDawg
November 25th, 2009
7:21 pm
What do all these mad Dawg fans call Joe Cox? Is it Ugay or Nerd or He is My QB?
Pi$$onaDawg
November 25th, 2009
7:25 pm
I will say again. To all Tech fans that are reading this blog and are going to the game. Please consider bring a red rose to the game and pass it to a UGA cheerleader and ask Her/Him to place it where UGA VII would have his house and watch the game.
NERDS!!
November 25th, 2009
7:26 pm
… just thought I’d perpetuate the rediculous ‘nerd’ vision that UGAy (oh, sorry sir, UGA) has of GT students and fans. In case you left your sense of humor and sarcasm in the truck … that was all in jest. I, like the AJC jounalists, just felt like stirring the pot. Obviously it worked.
Happy Thanksgiving John.
Love,
GT
flagpissonadawgboy!!!
November 25th, 2009
7:27 pm
are you the secret flagboy this year in tech’s marching band wearing a majorette’s uni and twirling the baton..lmfao..dawgs by 10 to 15 in this, mark my word!
hey..pissonaflagdawgboy!!!
November 25th, 2009
7:30 pm
will you and Mark be giggling in your cute little yellow wig with the rest of those tech frat boys…or do ya’ll just hold hands , lmfao
doggonepissonbydawg
November 25th, 2009
7:32 pm
i resemble that remark!
reck style
November 25th, 2009
7:32 pm
here’s what the dogs are going to see
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=E8GuH9oDHrU
yellow wigs?
November 25th, 2009
7:33 pm
they are dark yellow i’ll have you know and awfully cute ..and yes we will be giggling!!!
yellow wigs?
November 25th, 2009
7:33 pm
giggle giggle, hehee
see ya saturday , wreckies at grunt stadium
November 25th, 2009
7:36 pm
On bobby blue dodd field! will boise state let us play on ya’ll blue field in the bowl game this year..i mean that is your annual bowl ya know
TJ Vol
November 25th, 2009
7:37 pm
Tech is going to destroy the Bulldogs…maybe something like 45-19….does that sound familar….
dagnabit
November 25th, 2009
7:40 pm
I see where Bob Stoops is interested in Notre Dame. Looks like Urban is going to be using Mark Richt’s hair for toilet paper for 30 more years or so. How do you like that mental image ;weatherdog.
bp
November 25th, 2009
7:41 pm
Enter your comments here
patrick
November 25th, 2009
7:41 pm
This is rich. You really think Ga Tech will beat UGA. UGA has a point to make and I would hate to be Ga Tech this weekend. Its going to get ugly…real ugly. UGA has much more talent on the field and on the sidelines. Sorry maybe next year but I see UGA pounding Tech into a pulp just like they have 7 of the last 8 times they have met.
NERDS!!
November 25th, 2009
7:45 pm
actually no, patrick … UGA will beat themselves. They’ve gotten pretty good at it.
Beatugalikeayarddog
November 25th, 2009
7:46 pm
All The Way Turned Up!!!
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=yLzYtczNfKY
John
November 25th, 2009
7:54 pm
You dorks act like upsets never happen or that they are impossible. Upsets happen every weekend. Upsets happen sometimes in the Dorks/UGA series also. Don’t act like UGA does not even have a chance. Nobody gave Tech a chance last year in Athens and what happened? Payback time.
Pi$$onaDawg
November 25th, 2009
7:55 pm
DAWGS by 10-15 in the ARREST police blotter. The Dawgs will not beat TECH. The Dawgs will not out number Tech fans. Male DAWG fans will not be sober by 8 PM. Sole Male Dwag fans will beat on their women. I can go on. CUZ & 45ACP you know it is just too fun right now. I will get back to you guys after the game win or lose. Have a great Thanksgiving.
NERDS!!
November 25th, 2009
7:58 pm
John’s nerve = struck. Mission accomplished.
John
November 25th, 2009
8:03 pm
You are right “NERDS!!” My entire evening and Thanksgiving has been ruined due to your comments. I just don’t know what to do now. Shouldn’t you be playing chess or your gay world of warcraft thing? What’s it like still being a virgin?
VolNation
November 25th, 2009
8:04 pm
Hey guys, onto more important matters. Janzen has been reinstated and will start against KY?? Nice to see Lane showing support for his players…will definitely be a recruiting plus!
GT For You And Me
November 25th, 2009
8:06 pm
Some silly Dawg’s and some silly Jackets on here… Whadaya say!!! TOHWG!!
HOW 'BOUT THEM DOGS!
November 25th, 2009
8:06 pm
All the dawg fans should get a kick out of this….
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=yLzYtczNfKY
Gordon
November 25th, 2009
8:08 pm
John,
We “nerds” understand that UGA could win the game. Upsets happen. We also know that one great season and two wins (if it happens) over UGA doesn’t mean we will dominate the series for years to come. But we are very excited about our team as we should be. Imagine if you beat UF one year and were favored the next year. How much differently would UGA fans act than some of the Tech people on this blog?
GT For You And Me
November 25th, 2009
8:10 pm
Good point Gordon! That deserves a Blue Ribbon!!
GT Rules State
November 25th, 2009
8:11 pm
UGA footbal program reminds me of a rhyme … picture it:
Humpty Dumpty
Sorry, gonna be a while to put Humpty together again
Losers
Janzen? Kentucky?
November 25th, 2009
8:12 pm
uh hello, what world are u in?… oh can Kiffin get any more players out on parole, for their bowl……ya’ll are on a …roll…. lmfao
Janzen? Kentucky?
November 25th, 2009
8:15 pm
gt is on a roll with one in a row, forget the 23 win / loss deficit, its a new era, johnson obama wins 24 straight to overtake Georgia and take the series back for good…not…lmfao..wouldn’t be prudent..good luck u yellow wigged giggling flagboys..see you cuties saturday on the front row with bob uecker
John
November 25th, 2009
8:17 pm
Gordon, I have no problem with fans like you. It is the other morons like Pi$$onadawg that make Tech fans look terrible. Also anyone who agrees, acts like, or says the things he does. I hate Tech more then anyone but will be the first to say they have had a great season and I will be first to say that UGA has been AWFUL this year. UGA can only get better from here. Next year will be a 8 or 9 win season and things should be back to normal in 2011.
GT..a for u and me.. flag boy
November 25th, 2009
8:18 pm
are you the secret male majorette in the tech band big hoss? lmfao..twirl that baton well you big stud!!!
NERDS!!
November 25th, 2009
8:19 pm
dear little Johnny … in case you left your brain in the truck … my earlier comments about chess and world of warcraft were sarcasm (I guess they don’t teach that in Athens). I’m actually spending the evening with my lovely wife (UGA grad) and kids … all of whom have a better sense of sarcasm than you do. Nerds, dorks, whatever … I’m using this as my call sign this evening just for the hell of it. By day I actually manage a team of personal financial advisors (8 out of 10 of them are UGA grads).
Hope you, Bubba, Tami and Crystal have a nice Turkey Day at the trailer park. Make sure you keep a safe distance when you drop the turkey in the fryer.
Love,
GT
johnboy nerd..s!! aka flag holder boy
November 25th, 2009
8:22 pm
you are a real yellow wigged studly man if i do say so my dorky little chess playing self..good luck flag buggie!!! see ya between the slums on the flats saturday evening at grunt stadium, bobby blue dodd field!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Cox vs Brady
November 25th, 2009
8:26 pm
Tom Brady 1998 Michigan
131 Effic., 15 td’s, 12 int’s, 2636 yards
Joe Cox 2009 Georgia
139 Effic, 21 td’s, 14 int’s, 2350 yards (2 games to go)
GT For You And Me
November 25th, 2009
8:26 pm
GT..a for u and me.. flag boy : Your width,height,and girth aren’t good enough to qualify you for a male majorette. Maybe your pet Dawgs should join the band at GT. limp flag boy.
Happy thanksgiving bugs!!!!
November 25th, 2009
8:27 pm
Georgia is always thankful tech is on the schedule ..the dawgs always have a chance against the insects even as underdawgs…come saturday they will play as wonderdawgs…night and see ya on the flats..in between the slums!!!!!!!
John
November 25th, 2009
8:27 pm
“NERDS” you should try and be more like Gordon. That is very original of you by the way. Bubba, trailer park, etc. Come up with that all on your own? Very impressive! Yes, I am online right now in my trailer. What a loser. I’d love to see what your wife looks like if she married something like you.
is that GT.. is gay..for u and for me
November 25th, 2009
8:29 pm
so we dawgs don’t have to be, hey that rhymes..do youins take english at tech…see you in between the slums on saturday at Grunt Stadium!!!
thunderbull56
November 25th, 2009
8:29 pm
Question for the AJC minions.Who gives a FAT FLYING RAT’s A##,WHO DA F$%#$. FIRST.Long live Rock and Roll.If a damn dog’s demise is that big a deal,get a backup/second teamer for crying out loud.But USC,LSU,Oregon,Iowa,Ohio State,lol,Notre Dame,Oklahoma,Michigan,remember,Jawja too,remember,THE SUN DON’T SHINE ON THE SAME DOG’s BEHIND ALL THE TIME!I love college football whether UGA participates or not!I especially love it when the underdogs show up!Rationalize all you want,TCU,Boise,and CINCY deserve to play with the Overrated Big Boys.Playoffs,yes Dammit,playoffs.It’s the 21st century, grow up and be accountable ‘O Yea of Little Greed Conferences!
Paul in RDU
November 25th, 2009
8:34 pm
Janzen? Kentucky?
November 25th, 2009
8:15 pm
gt is on a roll with one in a row, forget the 23 win / loss deficit, its a new era, johnson obama wins 24 straight to overtake Georgia and take the series back for good…not…lmfao..
Hey – if you are going to talk smack, at least know what the series record is.
GT, SEC and NCAA have it at 59-39-5
UGA ignores the GT wins in 1943 and 1944 and claims it is 59-37-5
GT For You And Me
November 25th, 2009
8:36 pm
is that GT.. is gay..for u and for me : The only grunts you Dawgs will hear,will be coming from your team being”pounded” get it, in the turf Sat………
Solid Gold Dancer
November 25th, 2009
8:36 pm
This game may be close at the half. The adjustments will be made and Tech will outscore the mutts by 24 in the second half.
Tech 49
Ree Rees 23
Pi$$onaDawg
November 25th, 2009
8:39 pm
John I am glad you hate me I can now sleep better knowing 1 DAWG fans knows what every SEC Fan and Tech Fan knows: the DAWGs Fans suck and they can’t take what they give. All SEC teams hate the DAWG fans cause you run your mouth and have never really won a DAMN thing.
Solid Gold Dancer
November 25th, 2009
8:39 pm
Yellow Jackets: 49
Fence Menders: 23
GT For You And Me
November 25th, 2009
8:41 pm
GT-52 DAWGS-0
GT For You And Me
November 25th, 2009
8:42 pm
Pi$$onaDawg : Who gives a crap what some of these mangy Dawgs think!
GT Rules State
November 25th, 2009
8:44 pm
Pi$$onaDawg so right. Been almost 30 years since been to a real dance hadn’t beat a top 5 in their own stadium since. I don’t get the expectations. That’s what makes it so much fun kicker their a$$ cause the game mean nuthin else. So if if get your a$$ kicked by a nerd, what does that make you?
NERDS!!
November 25th, 2009
8:46 pm
John … you should try an be more like Gordon too. My wife is quite lovely, and I now regret mentioning her, except for this:: she looked outside of the Bulldawg nation to find the love of her life because she knows there’s a big wonderful world out there beyond DAWGS football. Hopefully when you grow up you’ll realize this. Until then, may god (CPJ) have mercy on your soul.
Now come on back with the last word … that’s the game here right?? I’m outta here…
Love,
GT
John
November 25th, 2009
8:47 pm
“Pi$$onaDawg” UGA has never won a damn thing? Really? Are you that uneducated? How many ACC championships have the nerds won lately? How many 10+ win seasons? How many wins over UGA this decade? How many bowl wins lately? What an absolute moron. Shows how much you know.
The Grinch
November 25th, 2009
8:49 pm
Tech will win, but this will be a closer game than most suppose. The Dawgs were looking ahead last week, and while every single person on the UGA coaching staff save Richt and possibly Stacy Searles should be fired immediately, the players will now be playing hard for them (and for pride). I expect a good effort.
RIP, UGA VII. Hopefully we can pull one off for you.
Pi$$onaDawg
November 25th, 2009
8:50 pm
I will say again to those that are going to the game If you chose please bring a Red Rose and give it to the UGA cheerleaders to have then place it on the field where UGA VII’s House should be.