Countdown: Bird-flippers, Glanville and now Barkley’s face?

This week's guest host is Big Bird. The term, "flipping the bird," actually was named for his cousin Vinny.

Big Bird, guest hosting for the vacationing Count, denies ever "flipping the bird." You be the judge.

The Count is vacationing this week. Too bad. He could have given us all a lesson on the number one. According to The Count’s favorite source, legend, the number one sign dates back to the ancient Romans, where it was commonly referred to as digitus impudicus, or, get your hands off my wife’s toga or I’m going to kickus-your-butticus. Much later, at least three or four weeks, digitus impudicus came to be known as, “flipping the bird.” When I asked Big Bird if this dates back to one of his ancestors, as I was told, he waved hello. At least, I think he waved hello. Can you tell? We count down . . .

10. Bud Adams: You’re a old bitter man

In full disclosure, let me start by saying I don’t like Bud Adams. I don’t like any sports owner who tries to hold up his city for a new stadium and then moves the team when he doesn’t get his way. Adams took the Titans (Oilers) out of Houston in 1997 and moved them to Tennessee. But I guess after giving an entire city the finger, he still had a double-barrel salute left in him. Dude must’ve been mixing Viagra and Metamucil again. Have you seen this video? If not, it’s from the end of the Titans’ 41-17 win over Buffalo Sunday in Nashville. The old bitter man flipped a double bird toward the Buffalo sideline. What a dumble-dork. Commissioner Roger Goodell was at the game. Actually, he left before Adams’ performance from the owner’s box but the Middle Finger Police must have brought him up to speed. The NFL fined Adams $250,000. I’m impressed. I thought you could only get fined that much if you dared to get mad at DeAngelo Hall.

9. Adams has a lot in common with … everybody?

A billion dollars couldn't buy some self-control.

Even billions couldn't buy self-control.

All these fingers. Nobody talks anymore. Do these kids today text the finger? Does the I-Phone have an ap for that? This finger thing actually has been around for a while. I wonder what Goodell would’ve fined Nelson Rockefeller. The late really, really rich guy and Vice President of the common people (kidding) once gave the finger to hecklers during a campaign stop in 1976. Seems they didn’t like his stance on Vietnam. And he just thought they were from Buffalo.

8. In retrospect, Vick ($10,000) got off pretty cheap

Certainly, the middle digit has a rich in sports. Do you own a 1972 Topps baseball card of Billy Martin (then as a Detroit Tigers manager). If so, you’ll find an extended digit from his left hand (and, no, it’s not an accident).  Garry

Martin scares 8-year-old card collectors.

Martin scares 8-year-old card collectors.

Templeton and Albert Belle are among those who’ve flipped off baseball fans. Jake Plummer flipped off football fans in Denver. Allen Iverson flipped off basketball fans in Milwaukee. Of course, Falcons fans fondly remember Michael Vick’s salute to them a few years ago. Vick should feel happy in retrospect. He was fined only $10,000 — $240,000 less than Adams. Question: Why is it less when you do it to your own team?

7. But ‘The Yankee Flipper’ stands alone

If only because it took place in New York, one story in obscene gesture sports history stands out. “Black” Jack McDowell was that rare combination of pitcher, rock and roll junkie and psychotic. When he was pitching for the Yankees in 1995, McDowell was pounded one game by the Chicago White Sox. He was booed by Yankees fans as he walked off the mound, and he responded in kind with a finger (on his pitching hand). The tabloids buried him, and he was dubbed, “The Yankee Flipper.” Here’s the back story: Turns out that McDowell had gone out on an all-night bender with Mike Mills and Scott McCaughey of R.E.M. and Dennis Diken of the Smithereens. McDowell was so drunk he passed out on his bathroom floor. How do we know this? Because McCaughey wrote a song about it for the “Baseball Project,” with my pal Steve Wynn, R.E.M.’s Peter Buck and Linda Pitmon. McCaughey humorously accepts some of the blame for McDowell’s meltdown. Maestro, if you please . . .

“The Yankee Flipper” by the Baseball Project

6. Blog contest winners are in

A couple of weeks ago, I opened the door to the blogosphere for a contest. I mentioned that I planned to add two or three new entries to my blogroll. Honestly, I wasn’t sure what the reaction would be. But I received about 30 entries and most of them were pretty good, which is unfortunate because it just further illustrates how easily I can be replaced. In the end, I picked four. Now, if I didn’t select you, don’t feel bad. My blogroll is “fluid.” Keep working on them and poke me once in a while on Twitter or Facebook and I’ll look at it.  The winners were based on information, creativity, presentation and timeliness. Not spelling, though. I have enough trouble with that so it wouldn’t be fair to hold you to a higher standard. And the winners are . . .

5) Peachtree Hoops, Dawg Blawg, Falcoholic, Monday Morning Point Guard

bloggingPeachtree Hoops is the best overall blog in terms of content and organization, with a mix of fact and opinion. Kudos to Drew Ditzel (or “Hawksdawg”). Peachtree Hoops recently counted down 72 reasons to be excited about the Hawks. About the only thing that disturbed me about the site was a headline on the web front that reads “There is first love, and then there is Zaza Pachulia love.” Georgia fans should enjoy Bernie’s Dawg Blawg, which includes “Monday’s Meatloaf” and “Bark of the Week,” and a blur of links. Blogger Chris Burnette also sent me this email: “I’ll admit I’m at odds with the AJC, but I’m a sucker for a good contest. That and I love my humble blawg. It’s not the best Dawg blog and it’s not born from my mother’s basement, but she does read it on occasion.” The Falcoholic is written by “Dave The Falconer” (of course). It’s well put together, frequently updated and is written for a quick, easy read. Finally, there’s the Monday Morning Point Guard by Andy Rosenberg. Andy frequently e-mail on about any sports topic but mostly the Hawks and the NBA. A snippet from a recent blog: “Just a few years ago the Hawks bench was more like two chairs, as it consisted of really two guys: the departed Josh Childress and Zaza Pachulia. These two reserves combined probably couldn’t average the 17 points per game Jamal Crawford is currently putting up.” Geez. Two Zaza references in one day.

4. What’s the reverse of a minstrel show?

Don't know if he can hit a home run, but can still scare pitchers. And children.

Know how some people can get away with something that NOBODY else could. That would be Charles Barkley. Last week we brought you the scary pictures of Sammy Sosa’s new face. Well, Barkley, the entertaining NBA/TNT commentator, who has never visited the corner of tact and political correctness, jumped on the story. Maybe a little too much. First came the expected mocking of Sosa on camera. Barkley joked Sosa only tried to “go white” so that he could get into the Hall of Fame. Then he had a makeup artist come in to, yes, turn him white. Take a look:

3. This cartoon has run its course

Custer called. He wants his hat back.

Custer called. He wants his hat back.

Jerry Glanville just got fired by Portland State. If that’s not hitting bottom, I’m assuming the next job involves either bowling shoes or circus elephants. Glanville, a pretty fair defensive coordinator in his day but a clown as a head coach, as we witnessed here, was fired by Portland State after going 9-24 in  three seasons at the 1-AA school. The team also reportedly had its second-worst paid attendance in 22 seasons. Guess that leaving-tickets-for-Elvis thing doesn’t really draw a crowd any more. This was part of Glanville’s defense the other day: “We played Montana, Montana State and Weber State better than we ever played them.” Why do I feel like I’m listening to Evander Holyfield?

2. We’ve got Spirit, yes we do

The Hawks won again Monday night and they’re now 9-2 and ranked No. 1 on ESPN’s “Power Poll” (for whatever that’s worth). The Thrashers have won four straight and are 10-6-1, despite having played six games without Ilya Kovalchuk. Is this really happening with both Atlanta Spirit franchises, or is this just when we remind ourselves that it’s only November? Also, maybe that one of the Atlanta Spirit owners suddenly is delving into Voodoo.

1. And finally: Bye-bye, Charlie

Asked before Notre Dame’s latest loss to Pittsburgh whether the Irish still was relevant as a national program, an irritated Charlie Weis shot back with sarcasm: “We’re so irrelevant. That denotes a bit of hypocrisy here. If we’re so irrelevant, why are we such a big story?” Anybody have a free finger?

DID YOU FORGET TO COUNT DOWN ONE WEEK? NO PROBLEM. CLICK HERE.

111 comments Add your comment

Heath

November 17th, 2009
2:39 am

Somebody tell Richt that Glanville is available. We could always use another clown on that staff.

[...] original here: Countdown: Bird-flippers, Glanville and now Barkley's face? | Jeff … By admin | category: cartoon, cartoon face | tags: assuming-the-next, bowling-shoes, [...]

tom

November 17th, 2009
3:38 am

It is 330am and I can’t put a rational sentence together!

matt r

November 17th, 2009
4:12 am

Thanks for the update tom.

falcon 71

November 17th, 2009
6:09 am

cant believe Glanville had such a poor record there. he should have gone to SMU with that jerk Jones.
Glanville hasnt forgotten football I guess his act wont work at D2 level which is just a step above high school anyway. he is definitalty not a babysitter

GT92

November 17th, 2009
6:12 am

One big bird, but no chicks…

"Chef" Tim Dix

November 17th, 2009
6:29 am

Black Jack and Smoltz ranks numero uno in MLB’s post season duels.

Chuck Barkley says what a sober man thinks.

Rockefeller, what a piece of work. A heartbeat or in this case a trip or fall, from the Presidency. He makes Glanville look like a nun.

Norton

November 17th, 2009
6:39 am

Glanville and Vick. Now that’s a bad dream.

MIKE ON LAKE HARTWELL

November 17th, 2009
6:44 am

JEFF, another GEM. thanks for starting my day out right!!

MiltonDawg

November 17th, 2009
7:22 am

Good Stuff JS- Could the Spirit actually have their stuff together this year? It only took 10+ years of horrible playing by both teams. Now if the Falcons can get back on track, everything in ATL will be peachy.

bob

November 17th, 2009
7:23 am

maybe Glanville is available to be dc in Athens if they let Willie go?

F-105 Thunderchief

November 17th, 2009
7:34 am

One might feel sorry for Charlie Weis if he weren’t such a $%#^@*.

Obi-Wan

November 17th, 2009
7:46 am

Jeff, do you ever get tired of throwing pearls before us swine? Your posts are great in showing that everybody takes sports waaay too seriously.

Tech Tony

November 17th, 2009
7:47 am

The Count isn’t on vacation. He’s secretly interviewing for Willie’s soon to be open position. It was supposed to be hush hush but things like this always seem to come out anyway.
Given the way the Dogs tackle sometimes, if Count turns the job down, Tickle Me Elmo is the next choice.

SimpleDawg

November 17th, 2009
7:49 am

Jerry just has a “little hitch in his get-a-long”.

War Jacket

November 17th, 2009
7:53 am

If Notre Dame football is irrevlevant, what does that make Georgia football, with their one national championship in 100+ years of playing football? I’d say about as relevant as Minnesota.

Larvell "Sugar Bear" Blanks

November 17th, 2009
8:06 am

Jeff,

In all honesty this was one of your weaker Tuesday Countdowns. Had I a gun I would’ve taken this column back out in the back in shot it. Who cares about Glanville. I wasn’t aware he was still alive much less coaching. Which says something about Glanville. Bud Adams is a bitter old man and this was such a overblown story. Fine the old man. End of Story. Also, I don’t need a history of flippers. If I want this then I will find the original porpoise Flipper. The Sosa Photo is downright freaky. If I NEVER see this photo again my life will be happier! Geeeze, any chance this guy winds up in the New “Scream” flick with Courtney Cox. Speaking of which, why no hot female wrestling shots or political shots at conservatives? Now I must go back to sleep on the wrong side of my bed!

Bernard

November 17th, 2009
8:07 am

Bobby Cox is sssssssoooooooo way OVERRATED….remember Chalie Leebrant? dah…

BravesFan79

November 17th, 2009
8:11 am

Hawaii made a HUGE mistake in not paying June Jones and keeping him there. Him and Glanville actually made a pretty good combo at Hawaii.
And i just don’t get not spending any $ on the Falcons defense…. feels like a wasted season almost. All our RB’s being hurt certainly has not helped.

Sautee Dawg

November 17th, 2009
8:13 am

Jeff
Where’s Rush Limbaugh when you need him???? Remember your article about NFL owners a few weeks ago??? And how Rush wouldn’t fit in as an owner????

Clay

November 17th, 2009
8:24 am

“10. Bud Adams: You’re a bitter old man”. Guess that makes two of you, huh, Jeff?

Bank Walker, Texas Ranger

November 17th, 2009
8:28 am

Glanville as DC? You Tech fans need to shut the hell up. The last thing UGA needs is to bring that circus to town. Barkley is the man. As for Weis, I hope they keep him until the BCS does away with ND’s “automatic bid”

Toots

November 17th, 2009
8:29 am

Met Black Jack at a pre-All Star Game party in Milwaukee in 2002. He was hilarious. Not a bad band either.

Bank Walker, Texas Ranger

November 17th, 2009
8:30 am

BravesFan, Glanville had nothing to do with the success at UH. They had to score 50 a game to win.

Andy Rosenberg

November 17th, 2009
8:41 am

Jeff, thanks for selecting my blog for your roll. Wow, did I just say that?! 3 years ago had anyone said the phrase, “thanks for selecting my blog for your roll” you would have probably been slapped or made a love connection.

Its a good time to be Monday Morning Point Guard….the Hawks are 9-2! Again, 3 years ago had anyone said that phrase, you would have probably been slapped.

Best,
Andy

redbird

November 17th, 2009
8:52 am

Tide Rising

November 17th, 2009
8:57 am

Charles Barkley is just a buffoon, a caricature, a jester here for amusement. He’s the typical azzclown who doesn’t realize people now laugh at him, not with him. As for the arrogant Weiss it looks like karma is doing its thing.

Bill

November 17th, 2009
8:57 am

Jeff there is an infamous Sports Illustrated cover from the 70′’s. It has Jim Kiick (sp) and Larry Czonka under a goal post.Kiick has his hand on his knee flipping off sporting America.I had that cover but it was lost in moving years ago.

BravesFan79

November 17th, 2009
9:21 am

War Jacket: Minnesotta is relevant… thats where Brock Lesner is from. And he is the 2nd baddest man on the planet…. next 2 Fedor! (That knockout of Rodgers was BADASS!!)

Boxing compared to MMA is like College Football football compared to the NFL. Both have systems that are outdated, and are loosing fans and respect because of it. Please give me a good reason TCU dosent deserve a shot at the national championship??
What… do you have to go undefeated 5 years in a row to have a shot at a title?
College football is so predictable its boring. And i say this as a GT fan knowing that thell always find a way to screw the ACC champ out of the big game.
Unless that ACC champ is named Miami or Florida State.

azcat225

November 17th, 2009
9:22 am

I assume Glanville was channeling Lt. Col. Bill Kilgore in that picture. That’s the closest he would ever get to a real pair of cujones.

Ozzy

November 17th, 2009
9:22 am

No cow bell, no scantily clad women.

Jeff – C’mon Man!

(The Glanville pic was kinda funny though).

kate gosselin

November 17th, 2009
9:26 am

Well Jeff Schultz you have really blown it this time. Out at 1:35a.m. carousing and getting poor Count so schnockered he couldn’t show up for duty today. I may just go all Brooke Hundley on you and tell Ms. Schultzette about us. Hush monies are accepted, you know me.

UGASlobberknocker

November 17th, 2009
9:32 am

Hey War Jacket..if Ga is like Minnesota, then Tech is Bimidji State. Cant you Tech fans just enjoy a good season without showing your a$$. Whether we are talking about Tech fans today , 30 yrs ago when they threw fish at No Dame players , or to 50 yrs ago when Tech’s dirty play led to Bama cutting off the series..Tech fans have no class. cmon Tech fans,act like youve been there before .

Bat Masterson

November 17th, 2009
9:33 am

Well, Barkley, the entertaining NBA/TNT commentator, who has never visited the corner of tact and political correctness if it, jumped on the story

if it, what?

BravesFan79

November 17th, 2009
9:34 am

Actually Glanville DID help make Hawaii defense better. Im not sure of the actual stats, but i remember a thing feature on him and June Jones going back to the Falcons days a few years ago on ESPN.
And Barkely is a CLOWN! He is a wife cheating, big mouthed moron. I used to party with some girls that knew him. They thought he was cool at first, but then found out about his racist/ sexist side and wont have anything to do with him anymore.
Please have another donut Charles so you die of a heart attack within the next 10 years. You will NOT be missed!
And funny how “Sir Charles” makes fun of Sosa wanting to be white, yet Barkley is a self hater himself, in how he perfers to cheat on his wife with white women. Whats amatter fat Barkley.. not proud enough of your own race of women to be attracted to them!??

And why is the Golf channel, of all channels, kissing his azzz and giving Barkley a show!?? Do you see BET giving any white people their own show and going out of their way to kiss their azz?

BravesFan79

November 17th, 2009
9:41 am

Id bet $$ that Glanville would make a better defensive coordinator than Willie Martinez!! And maybe Notre Dame should look at hiring June Jones away from SMU. Even tho it would look wierd to see Notre Dame lined up in the shotgun all the time.

The Dogfighter Returns

November 17th, 2009
9:45 am

“Do you see BET giving any white people their own show and going out of their way to kiss their azz”
——
Please explain how what you said above helps BET’s business and their viewing audience. since you brought it up I am sure you must know something no one else knows

UGASlobberknocker

November 17th, 2009
9:45 am

Poll question to Dawg fans on this blog:

Among regular non Dawg fan bloggers, who is the best? I define “best” as the bloggers who make good points about FOOTBALL and dont get in personal pi$$ing matches with other bloggers. They support their school clearly, but show respect, restraint and class when posting. Criticism is not mean spirited and focused on football. Someone who can crack a good joke. In short, who comes across as someone who you wouldnt mind sitting next to in Sanford.

my choices:

Bama Stan; Tampa Gator, Charlotte Gator

who else?

The Dogfighter Returns

November 17th, 2009
9:51 am

Boxing compared to MMA is like College Football football compared to the NFL. Both have systems that are outdated, and are loosing fans and respect because of it
—–
you can’t compare college football to the nfl, that’s similar to comparing a boy to a man. The nfl is where the best football players reside.

jim

November 17th, 2009
9:55 am

The Barkley video was in pretty bad taste from TNT. If this were a white reporter getting made up to become black it would be all over the news, Jesse Jackson and Al Sharpton would be protesting the channel, and riots would probably break out in the inner cities.

Independent Thinker

November 17th, 2009
9:57 am

UGA Saliva Producer…I know most of you do drool, but equating a dirty play by a player on the field and saying that was the “Fans?” That’s like saying all the UGA fans rushed the end zone at the UF game a couple of years ago. As usual, makes NO sense.

Kinda like the “dawg pound.” ISn’t that where dogs go to be euthanised? Makes a lot of sense! NOT!

PMC

November 17th, 2009
10:00 am

Charlie Weis would probably do a lot better if he weren’t so much of an arrogant fat gas bag. The “schematic advantage” isn’t working. You’re exactly as successful as the last 3 coaches there. You are not Bill Belicheck. You are an average head coach deal with it!

Go back to the NFL and be an OC.

Paul H

November 17th, 2009
10:18 am

War Jacket – if UGA is as relevant as Minnesota, what does that make Tech who has only beaten UGA 12 times since LBJ was president?

SPURRIER

November 17th, 2009
10:37 am

You’ve got to love all the whining coming out of Athens these days. What a bunch of “BABIES.”

sameold

November 17th, 2009
10:38 am

How could you forget Jeff George?

GIVE ME A BREAK

November 17th, 2009
10:42 am

Is there anyone in America that doesn’t think “GEORGIA TECH” is going to kick uga back to their mediocre porch?

CPJ

November 17th, 2009
10:44 am

There’s nothing willie and Mark can do to stop my offense.

Willie

November 17th, 2009
10:46 am

Can we really go to a bowl?

sidslid

November 17th, 2009
10:48 am

Local team ranking:

GT Football

Hawks (very much on the tail (wing) of the bees)

Thrashers (sometimes teams as a whole get better when a star goes down….we shall see with the next team in the rankings)

Falcons (I have a feeling Smitty and Company get ‘er done in The Meadowlands)

GT Basketball (ACC looks down this year. If Hewitt doesn’t perform in-conference this time around, buyout cost be damned)

UGA Football (Auburn rivalry produces some of the stranger efforts of any rivalry around)

Braves (they can’t afford the big bats on the free agent market. I sense Schaeffer in right to open the year)

UGA Basketball (very possible Braves could be lowest on the totem pole in a couple weeks)

Kroger

November 17th, 2009
10:48 am

UGA gets invitation to “SCOTTS” Toilet Paper Bowl.