Weekend Predictions: Dogs go down like meeces to pieces
Before getting to this week’s almost perfect blue-chip indicators, give or take a turnover, we have big news from the heart of the real Southeastern Conference — Bangladesh. A farmer was honored for killing 83,450 rats on his farm, and who even knew Jackie Sherrill had that many cousins?
Mokhairul Islam, clearly no relation to Willie Martinez, has done such a great job defending his Dhaka farm from a ground assault, that he was rewarded with a 14-inch color television, after which he immediately complained about having to pay for the NFL Network.
“I am so happy to get this honor,” he said. “I had no idea that the government gives prizes for this.”
Prizes? Can they get this guy in Athens? (Aspiring journalists: This is a transition.) Here’s a guy with a game plan that worked every week for nine months. Imagine what he’d do to Florida. Georgia can’t figure out what it is. Good offense, bad defense. Good defense, bad offense. You want consistency? The Dogs have 12 turnovers (which ranks 113th out of 120) and 41 penalties (119th).
The good news: We don’t rely on them for food supply.
This week, it’s LSU. Everybody’s banging on the Tigers for being overrated. But how overrated does a No. 4 team have to be to lose in Athens? Sorry. Take the gift three. But Dogs lose this straight up.
Is This Gonna Be On The Test?
Johnny Cash missed kickoff this day.
Tech at Missy State: True story: Johnny Cash once got drunk in Starkville, spent the night in jail and later wrote a song about it (“Starkville City Jail”). But he claimed he actually was arrested for picking flowers, so Starkville now has the Johnny Cash Flower Pickin’ Festival. Hey, when your football team stinks and your city makes Hattiesburg look like Salzburg, you take what you can get. And you get drunk a lot. Enough deep analysis. Tech runs crazy and covers 6.
Auburn at Tennessee: Auburn is 4-0. The new slogan on campus is, “Do What We Do” (“DWWD”). It’s become so popular Bobby Lowder is thinking of having it engraved on souvenir handcuffs to be sold in campus bookstores, which should replenish the slush fund while he’s in prison for mortgage fraud. Meanwhile: Not sure about Lane Kiffin, but Papa Kiffin can still coach defense: Vols cover 1 ½.
Oklahoma at Miami: The Canes crashed in Blacksburg after wins over FSU and Tech. But why have oddsmakers gone Sooner-crazy?
Dr. Jack, working on Kentucky's schedule
Oklahoma lost at BYU, then beat up Idaho State and Tulsa, I guess because the game against Fred’s Farmhands and Catfish Brokers fell through. Sooners win. But raise Canes and 7.
Bama at Roadkill: The NCAA’s new schedule-maker, Prof. Ludwig von Kevorkian, scheduled Kentucky to play Florida and Alabama in consecutive weeks. Wouldn’t cyanide be quicker? Tide covers 15 ½.
Flawed State at B.C.: The Jimbo Fisher offense produced seven points against South Florida. Can’t blame that on the schedule maker. But Noles cover 5.
NFL Six Pack
(Nike denies an agent’s claim that it has re-signed Michael Vick but concedes they’re giving him free shoes. Nike, however, did not deny that they’re financial mercenaries and will soon begin marketing the Air Circus Freak Sideshow if Vick doesn’t soon evolve into something more than Eagles’ equivalent of the two-headed goat-man.)
I kinda like this picture.
Packers at Favre: Brett Favre goes against his ex-team for the first time since multiple lies, tantrums and Green Bay’s refusal to name several cheeses after him. Read one story where ex-Packer Fuzzy Thurston took down all of his pictures of Favre in his house. It’s like an exorcism, without the pea soup. Take the 3 ½, but Pack upsets Vikings straight up.
Giants at Chiefs: The Patriots Effect worked for the Falcons with Thomas Dimitroff. But the Chiefs are 0-3 under Scott Pioli. He made seven transactions in a span of 24 hours this week. You might want to check your messages. You could be on punt coverage Sunday. Stat of the week: Chiefs have lost 26 of their last 28, give or take a major organ. Giants cover 9.
Ravens at Patriots: The Falcons made New England’s defense look like Baltimore’s defense. And Baltimore’s defense doesn’t look anything like the Falcons’ defense. If I lost you, let me put it another way: Take the 2 and Ravens in a road upset.
Question: When does Jimmy blame himself for a loss?
Seahawks at Colts: To save time in the post-game, Jim Mora has distributed a list of people to the media that he’s going to blame for this week’s loss. Colts by, like, 80 (or wherever the line ends up).
Jets at Saints: The Saints have the No. 1 offense. The Jets have the No. 3 defense. Drew Brees has thrown nine TD passes. The Jets’ secondary has allowed only one. Now let’s talk about what’s really important. New York fans are getting way too obnoxious. Saints cover 7.
Bills at Dolphins: Terrell Owens didn’t have a catch last week. Bill Parcells doesn’t have a win this year. I know. You’re emotionally torn. Got a funny feeling about this one. T.O. finds the end zone and Buffalo wins in a mild upset (but take the 1 ½).
♦
Toteboard
Last week: 11-2 straight up, 7-6 against the line.
Bottom dollars: 29-13 straight up, 18-24 against the line.
NEED TO CATCH UP ON PREVIOUS EPISODES OF WEEKEND PREDICTIONS? CLICK HERE.
Tell us what you think about the site
Customer Care »
Vacation stops, manage subscriptions and more
AJC Services
Sections
Other Editions
Guides
Visitor Agreement | Privacy Statement
© 2011 The Atlanta Journal-Constitution
251 comments Add your comment
JB
October 1st, 2009
3:51 pm
I think dawgs win, especially since Shultz picked LSU……………
Bat Masterson
October 1st, 2009
3:54 pm
I have a weekend prediction for you Jeff. If you will take a few hours and read” The Knockout”, by Katie Kitamura, you will be glad you did. It’s only 191 pages, her first novel. Thank me later, Bat.
reservoirDAWG
October 1st, 2009
3:54 pm
I agree JB. Schultz needs to get back to his Peanuts cartoon.
theTruth
October 1st, 2009
3:54 pm
Tn loses straight up. UGA/LSU is a tossup, go with UGA at home.
Odds Shultz buys Rogaine: 2 to 1.
Just kidding, shultzie.
Ryno
October 1st, 2009
4:04 pm
Jeff – I’ll take the under on that 4.5 turnover number. But I had to think about it alot.
Bat Masterson
October 1st, 2009
4:05 pm
Whoa, Bat………. That should read “The Long Shot” It’s about mixed Martial arts fighting, not hot chicks.
how2fish
October 1st, 2009
4:05 pm
I take great relief after your picks…when I see your record…which I give you kudos for showing that against the line stat.Good blog.
u-no
October 1st, 2009
4:11 pm
I think the Dogs might run out of luck this time… LSU wins in a close one. Jeff, seriously, FSU wins over BC? Don’t think so. Techies better get their act together on the road if they are going to win, they just didn’t look all that great against UNC. I think the Auburn-Tenn match is a toss-up, I’ll take the War Eagles in a tight fight. Sooners win and Bama rolls. The two NFL games I care anything about are seeing the Packers beat the Vikings, and the Jets fly past the Saints.
RxDawg
October 1st, 2009
4:13 pm
Bah, can’t blame ya. The dawgs have had 4 games to show they can correct their mistakes. Nothing tells me game 5 is a charm!
GT Brill
October 1st, 2009
4:17 pm
Jackets in a runaway ?!?! Thanks, I’ll now find my bookie and throw all my duckets on State.
Larvell "SugarBear" Blanks
October 1st, 2009
4:19 pm
Shultzheimer……
As much as I love the Dawgs I see LSU winning this on a field goal. Definitely take the under in this game. Both teams are gonna come out really tight…….so tight that UGA’s defense plays their usual style of Martinez style back pedal defense. GT finds out what Johnny Cash finds out. This ain’t no flower picking win!
74Dawg
October 1st, 2009
4:22 pm
I realize Georgia has looked like they are clueless about 40% of each game. But what has LSU or Miles shown you to make you think they can beat anybody this year? Georgia has more weapons and better offensive coaching. Dawgs 38, LSU 31. Oh wait, we never cover. Dawgs 33, LSU 31.
74Dawg
October 1st, 2009
4:26 pm
Hey, isn’t tere any college football tonight? What’s the ACC coming to ?
THE status quo
October 1st, 2009
4:26 pm
The dawgs have fallen into a rut and can’t get out of it. I do not expect any changes for the LSU game. As for the fumbling, why not try throwing away those thick gloves for a change. No qb I know wears them.
Jeff Schultz
October 1st, 2009
4:27 pm
JB — that hurts, deeply.
The Truth — Hey, if it was cheap and I knew it’d work, I’d buy six cases of the stuff.
Ryno — Got you down for the under.
U-no — B.C. is awful.
Larvell — Agree. I don’t see a ton of points. But then, everybody thought the same before the South Carolina game. Weird year.
74Dawg — I just think they’re a better team, smarter team, tougher team. We’ll find out.
Hillbilly Deluxe
October 1st, 2009
4:28 pm
A farmer was honored for killing 83,450 rats on his farm, and who even knew Jackie Sherrill had that many cousins?
Come on Jeff, you owe those rats an apology.
New York fans are getting way too obnoxious.
This is a recent development?
You might want to check your messages. You could be on punt coverage
My leg is killing me. Can I get like 25% of the salary and sit on the bench? Look at it this way, I’m not going to get burned that way, so it’s probably a good investment.
Joey
October 1st, 2009
4:34 pm
Jeff, as bad as I hate to agree with you on anything, you’re probably right. Turnovers, penalties, special teams, all of the things the coaches were going to correct this year are still issues. I’m not a bandwagon jumper – I’ll agonize over every bad play and jump out of my Lazy Boy every good one, every week. I just have lost faith in Mark Richt’s judgement – not his own coaching ability but the ones to whom he has delegated the responsibilities to – his friends on his staff.
Jeff Schultz
October 1st, 2009
4:34 pm
Hillbilly — Point taken on the rats.
Bob Horner had a sweet compact swing
October 1st, 2009
4:34 pm
Jeff doesn’t need Rogaine….his wife likes his hairdo..(is rogaine for hair growth or ED)…BUT anyway…..Jeff I think the dawgs win Sat. no clue why…I guess because they played like crap last week and won….they are do for a no turnover game….right..???
harry dawg
October 1st, 2009
4:37 pm
LSU will run out to the corners on UGA and we will be in deep dodo, like vs tech and U of F last year. We are so weak on the corners. We also are so weak covering any receivers from any school beyond middle school level.
FG kicking is good ……….so far. Punting is for the most part stellar. Awesome punting game.
O? If we focus soley on AJ with long time developing bombs, then they will double team him with QUALITY Dbacks and we will be in trouble. Sack city for J Cox. UGA needs to use quick outs to the fullbacks and to the T ends, one of whom is spelled Orson. If we try to run wide on LSU, it will turn ugly. We just do not have that skill set in our arsenal of plays.
We need to deploy anybody with any speed on O. Rontavious Wooten and Marlon Brown and Orson Charles and Brandon Smith and maybe Carlton Thomas out in space with dump passes. Israel Troupe and Tavarres King for sure can help make BIG PLAYS. We need em or else it could turn ugly.
Turnovers will decide the game and we are showing a bad, bad trend in this category after 4 games.
Richard and Caleb and Cox had better be ready to handle the ball.
Gooooooooooo Dawgs !!!
Ray
October 1st, 2009
4:39 pm
Lsu +10 in turnovers. Dawds -9.
That’s all you need to know. Cox throws 3 ints. LSU trounces in 37-21 win
observor
October 1st, 2009
4:42 pm
You’re right schultz, I was just so impressed by that incredible performance and resounding win that LSU put up against that juggernaut that is MSU. They are CLEARLY the better team.
DawginLex
October 1st, 2009
4:45 pm
Anybody think we see a west coast style offense Saturday? lots of short throws mixed in with some play action. Orson C has a big day. Jefferson scares me but I’m not buying the fact that just because he whipped Tech, we should be skered.
38-35 Dawgs and it may actually be worse but WM is still our D coordinator
FLA DAWG
October 1st, 2009
4:48 pm
I’m not sure why but I keep getting that same feeling I had when Bama was coming to Athens last season.
This out but this may be the game where LSU comes into their own this season and opens up with both barrels to dominate The Dawgs.
I hope I’m wrong.
homer
October 1st, 2009
4:54 pm
Georgy loses 35 to 10.
Eastside Jacket
October 1st, 2009
4:59 pm
observor – Were you more impressed with thUGA’s (119th in penalties) incredible and resounding wins over the juggernauts South Carolina, Arkansas and Arizona State ???
Pi$$onaDawg
October 1st, 2009
5:01 pm
The Dawgs will not be close enough at the end of this game to win on the last play. 4 games: too many flags, too many turn overs, and had to win on the last play in your 3 wins. That ain’t good. Tech wins and by 10 at least. Vols have played somebody and Auburn hasn’t Vols easy. Bama could cover 21. FSU will right the ship and BC is bad with little speed.
JDW
October 1st, 2009
5:02 pm
I think this is the week the DAWGS put it together…don’t know if they can do it more than one week but we shall see. FLA DAWG feels like Bama I got that 2007 Aubarn feeling.
SouthGaDawg
October 1st, 2009
5:06 pm
You guys are acting like LSU has dominated this year or something. 28.8 points a game and 310 yards of offense a game against subpar teams doesn’t equal world beater. They’ve also underachieved like that with a plus 7 turnover ratio. And how is this impressive when they’ve played the likes of UW, ULL, Vandy and MSU?
The fact of the matter is that UGA’s problems are very fixable (don’t fumble, and wait for the ball to snap before moving); however, a bad offense like LSU’s is not easily fixed.
The Dawgs have the better offense, and they are much more explosive than LSU. Finally, the Dawgs have been battle tested, whereas, LSU’s only “battle” was against a MSU team that in all likelihood will get their brains beat in by a so-so Tech team. Because of this, I like the Dawgs to get healthy this weekend and continue their domination of Clueless Miles.
Einsteindawg
October 1st, 2009
5:10 pm
It would be great if the Dawgs could put everything together and beat the Tigers; however, I think Jeff is correct. I may be crazy, but are our Dawgs beginning to emulate FSU or vice versa? Top 5 recruiting classes not panning out, inbred system of coaches with no accountability, abundant suspensions/penalties/turnovers, and an offense that is dated. And, a head coach stubborn to the core. I sure wish that CMR would bring in someone to simplify our offense and defense, so our athletes could be more productive. Anyway, just my opinion. Peace and go Dawgs!
Jeff Schultz
October 1st, 2009
5:13 pm
Bob Horner — My wife loves my hair. Both of them. (Thank you, try the veal.)
Observer — I never said they’ve LOOKED like the superior team. I just think they are. Whether they play like it is another matter. It’s been a strange, strange season.
Homer — In Athens? Oooh. THAT would be ugly.
PI$$ — This is scary. I agree with your entire post.
Old Dawg
October 1st, 2009
5:14 pm
Tonight’s matchup on ESPN? Colorado @ West Virginia. What, no Ball State vs. Toledo? I’m so disappointed.
KJ
October 1st, 2009
5:14 pm
“The Dawgs … had to win on the last play in your 3 wins”
Wow, I somehow missed that 11-point play against Arkansas at the end of the game. Must have been something!
Bob Horner had a sweet compact swing
October 1st, 2009
5:15 pm
FLA DAWG…this creepy feeling you’re getting..was at the beginning of the UGA/Alabama game last year or at half time when it was 31-0….I felt great at “game time..” last year…but not at half time….
SEC Fan
October 1st, 2009
5:17 pm
Jeff, great photo of Dr. Jack! Do you suppose he would be available to help our Dawgs on defense?
BugKiller
October 1st, 2009
5:18 pm
My favorite development in the Fire Willie Martinez Movement is that Martinez has become a punch line for two of the Atlanta print / digital media’s best, or, the only guys left standing not named Bisher, whichever you and Bradley want to be known as.
Either way, his time in Athens has a definitive expiration date now. Damon Evans (and his Master, Darth Adams) are two guys who are media conscious. They know that the Georgia defense and their Defensive Coordinator is a joke, and nothing Mark Richt can do short of threatening to quit, will keep Willie Martinez in Athens past this year.
Kirby Smart, Georgia Defensive Coordinator in waiting.
74Dawg
October 1st, 2009
5:18 pm
Poll question suggestion Jeff. What would you rather have move in next door to you?
83,450 rats
Jackie Sherrill
Bobby Petrino
David Axelfraud
October 1st, 2009
5:28 pm
Vols over Auburn????? Vols have ZERO offense. LSU is not going to beat UGA. I hate UGA but UGA has a better offense. LSU barely pulled a win over MSU.
Auburn by 7. UGA by 13.
WGD
October 1st, 2009
5:30 pm
UGA and Auburn both win — both might be ugly wins — but the Dawgs and Tigers get it done…
As for the rest? Who cares…
Joey
October 1st, 2009
5:32 pm
I’m with ya, David Axelfraud…Wait, doesn’t that mean we’ll have to score 63?
David Axelfraud
October 1st, 2009
5:33 pm
I do believe Auburn is overlooked this year because their terrible season last year. How many teams have ESPN built up this year? Hmmmm, LSU, Ole Miss, Cal, USC, Ohio State and Miami. Auburn has a damn good team this year. People like Shultz seem to think that since Auburn is not ranked, yet, that they are not that good. TN lost to UCLA……UCLA!!!!!! Not exactly a good team.
Does it ever occur to Shultz that maybe, just maybe this Auburn team could take on any team in the SEC and win? Florida is not invincible and Auburn is the ONLY team in the SEC to beat them twice since Tebow played. UGA can’t beat FL, Bama can’t beat Fl and LSU can barely get past Miss St.
BugKiller
October 1st, 2009
5:34 pm
David, South Carolina didn’t have an offense until Willie Martinez provided them the confidence they needed.
Arkansas’ offense looked like the greatest the SEC had ever seen, and if it weren’t for AJ Green and the fact that their defense is somehow worse then the Men of Martinez, we would have lost that game. Then, of course, while playing a REAL SEC DEFENSE the very next weekend, overseen by former Dawg, Kirby Smart, the Arkansas offense looked like crap.
This game goes down to the wire. The Dawgs have to score over 40 just to win this game, as they did against Arkansas.
The thing is, I don’t know if we can, even with AJ Green, because LSU’s defense is much, much better than any we’ve played this year, at least as talent goes.
Who wants to bet THEIR defense is closer to gelling than our guys, who are led by the most incompetent DC in the history of Georgia football?
When you’re favored by 3 points in Vegas as a home team, that means that Vegas thinks the outcome can go either way. The 3 points is what you get in football for home field advantage.
That means Vegas has no real idea who wins this game. And if they don’t know, I’m scared for our chances.
David Axelfraud
October 1st, 2009
5:37 pm
BugKiller, LSU is NOT that good. Very overrated team. You’re right about UGA having to score over and over again to beat Arkansas. But LSU’s defense is not that great. FL and Bama both have terrific defenses but Florida is about to get a taste of humility. Especially if Tebow is out for a while.
SGA Dawg
October 1st, 2009
5:39 pm
the party is over…..we get killed from here on out. we suck at every thing, just look at the ratings”almost last in everything” ….we are a delusional team in a delusional league. But the Gators rock and so do Bama….wait a minute have we been reduced to pulling for Bama and Tebow to save face for our conference? wait till next year….again !.
jake
October 1st, 2009
5:51 pm
UGA wins
Bama wins
Auburn wins
Miss State wins
Miami wins
Fl State wins
TrueDawg
October 1st, 2009
5:52 pm
SGA Dawg, UGA will wipe the turf with those cajun boys. Yeah we get too many penalties and can’t seem to get our share of turnovers but the kitty cats go down 33 – 18. UGA just has too many horses.
Bob Horner had a sweet compact swing
October 1st, 2009
5:54 pm
David good point on Auburn beating Florida…they manned up on Defense beat em…I remember both those games….
BugKiller….you are correct… Vegas has ZERO confidence in either team…the 3 point spread is a (”I don’t know spread..) a roll of the dice…..
Sautee Dawg
October 1st, 2009
5:56 pm
If Penn and his crew are officiating saturday against LSU we may have 41 penalties by halftime..
Mike Hampton Is My Hero
October 1st, 2009
6:00 pm
Jeff
Sometimes you funny. Sometimes you not so funny.
Today – you pretty funny!
Chiefs could be the worst team in the history of the NFL, at least a tie with the Lions. Being from KC and and old enough to remember, I sure miss the Willie Lanier, Bobby Bell, Len Dawson, Otis Taylor and Mike Garrett days for the Chiefs.
I wish I didn’t think this, but I think UOG beats LSU. Hopefully you’re right about Tech.
Go Jackets!
Cuz
October 1st, 2009
6:07 pm
I’ll take both dawgs(dogs) to win. Just a hunch.
One of two things happens with LSU, we get over the turnover bug, my favorite, or that bug finnally bites us. I am going with the former. Maybe Penn Wagers will come down with a mild case of swine flu after eating at his favorite rib joint.