Imagine it: Bill and Ted’s excellent dinner party

I was recently asked to fill out a questionnaire that included the following familiar query:

“Which three figures from history would you most like to have over for dinner?”

My three choices were Thomas Jefferson, Abraham Lincoln and Jesus Christ.

Jefferson, because he was an intelligent man of great contradictions. I’d want to know how much he grasped about the implications of freedom and how the basic philosophy that he espoused might be expanded to realms he had not imagined.

Lincoln, because of his sense of humor and the innate wisdom about human nature that he demonstrated.

And Jesus because, questions of godhood aside, his philosophy and teachings were so far ahead of his time and place, and so far ahead of our own as well, as to be extraordinary.

And of course, listening to Jefferson and Jesus discuss the Nazarene’s deity status might be the highlight of the evening.

301 comments Add your comment

Peadawg

June 21st, 2010
3:26 pm

Jesus Christ is an obvious choice. But the other 2…from all of history…is tough to chose.

Outhouse GoKart

June 21st, 2010
3:26 pm

My three choices….hmmm let me see…

1. Kyle Wingfield
2. Jay Bookman
3. Cynthia Tucker

Keanu

June 21st, 2010
3:26 pm

Peadawg

June 21st, 2010
3:28 pm

Did they have to be dead or could they still be alive?

Keanu "Cant Act" Reeves

June 21st, 2010
3:28 pm

“Tyler, I love you bra. *slams phone* Damn, why cant I say what it is I want to say when I want to say it about what I need to say….”

HUH…

@outhouse

June 21st, 2010
3:28 pm

@OG are you saying the go kart and the outhouse would be the transportation and the dinner venue worthy of such gravitas?

Outhouse GoKart

June 21st, 2010
3:30 pm

Cynthia could ride with me but Jay and Kyle are on their own.

Paul

June 21st, 2010
3:31 pm

Jay

Short science fiction story some years back. Award winner. Scientists had developed a machine that let them look back in history as if they were watching a film. Led to riots, death, pandemonium as peoples’ illusions were shattered.

Normal

June 21st, 2010
3:31 pm

I’d have to say Jefferson, if I could only have one. Lincoln and I would fight and Jesus probably wouldn’t know anything of what I would be asking about

Peadawg

June 21st, 2010
3:35 pm

You could make all three Herschel Walker (depending on which personality you talk to). :)

I’d probably say
Jesus Christ
Vince Dooley
the third person is hard to come up with

Paul

June 21st, 2010
3:38 pm

“And of course, listening to Jefferson and Jesus discuss the Nazarene’s deity status might be the highlight of the evening.”

You might be disappointed, given answers such as “Some say that I am” or “Before Abraham was, I am” or “why do you not understand the prophets?”

He and Jefferson might just talk about human nature. Or Truth. Or free will. And that would’ve been interesting, too.

Hillbilly Deluxe

June 21st, 2010
3:39 pm

Jesus, I will meet someday. Here are my three at this time. Tomorrow, they might be different.

1-My Grandpa (the one that died before I was born).
2-Hank Williams, Sr.
3-William Wallace

Normal

June 21st, 2010
3:42 pm

Jesus Christ would just talk about carpentry or the virtues of the adz..

Jefferson

June 21st, 2010
3:43 pm

It would be nice to have Duane Allman come by and sit in one night..

Normal

June 21st, 2010
3:46 pm

Marilyn Monroe, Barbi Benton, and Greta Garbo.

scrappy

June 21st, 2010
3:47 pm

Only if the after dinner entertainment was watching the Da Vinci Code… it would be great to get Jesus’ take on that… :)

Matti

June 21st, 2010
3:49 pm

Jimi Hendrix, Otis Redding, and Janis Joplin. Dinner and a sing-a-long!

D-Boe

June 21st, 2010
3:49 pm

MLK
Tupac
Notorious B.I.G.

DebbieDoRight

June 21st, 2010
3:50 pm

I think my 3 would be Jefferson, Sally Hemmings and Nat Turner and an dishonorable mention would be Jim Jones (People’s Temple).

AmVet

June 21st, 2010
3:52 pm

Buddha, on the current state of man.

John Lennon, on the current state of music.

George Carlin, on the current state of BS…

Road Scholar

June 21st, 2010
3:56 pm

Jesus, Tom Watson, Walter Cronkite; but Jesus may be busy!

Peadawg: How can you support that socialist program at UGA? Did you see the picture of Venezuala’s dictator, Hugo Chavez, with the UGA hat on? Maybe UGA can play their football team as an out of conference game? You know, UGA always schedules patsies at the beginning of the season. I hear Venezuala is nice that time of year?

josef nix

June 21st, 2010
4:00 pm

Good question…

Ancient History
1. Abraham of Ur–so, Abie, what do you think of the mess your kids have made?
2. Moses–what did y’all talk about off the record?
3. Machir the Babylon–so, why DID they choose you?

Modern History
1, Maimonides–got some questions from me and the perplexed
2. Pocahontas–what did you and your Unmentionable talk about
3. Judah P. Benjamin–what WAS in those papers you burned

Sarah Palin

June 21st, 2010
4:00 pm

“Which three figures from history would you most like to have over for dinner?”

All of them!

kayaker 71

June 21st, 2010
4:01 pm

Ted Turner, Ronald Reagan and Harry Truman. And if you threw in a fourth, Arnold Palmer.

HG3

June 21st, 2010
4:04 pm

Pretty sound choices, JB…

AmVet

June 21st, 2010
4:05 pm

Jesus would be fun though.

So tell me Christ, what do you think about the stories those guys wrote and the quotes they (mis?)attributed to you in the Bible?

Dinner Guests

June 21st, 2010
4:10 pm

1. Jerry Garcia
2. Mozart
2. King David

Southern Comfort

June 21st, 2010
4:11 pm

If I had to narrow it to three, these would be i the first group:

1) Nathan B. Forrest – Questions about the Civil War strategies and Reconstruction.
2) Martin L. King Jr. – To ask about the inspiration for the Mountain Top speech among other topics.
3) Garret Morgan – Just to understand his creative thought process

I’d have to do several of those dinners as there are many who I would want to ask questions to on many different subjects.

josef nix

June 21st, 2010
4:12 pm

Dinner Guest
I’d like to come to that party…!

Paul

June 21st, 2010
4:13 pm

First question for all three: So, what’s it like there?

DebbieDoRight

June 21st, 2010
4:14 pm

I would only have Jesus over if I ran out of wine…..

Pocahontas though is a good one — I wonder if she ever regretted saving what’s his face’s life? If she just would’ve shut up, it would’ve saved her people centuries of persecution.

"Information becomes a distraction, a diversion, a form of entertainment" - BHO, May 1, 2010

June 21st, 2010
4:15 pm

#1 – Hugh Hefner

#2 – “The Most Interesting Man In The World”

#3 – Ron Paul

Kamchak

June 21st, 2010
4:15 pm

Temujin
Charlemagne
Lenny Bruce

NowReally

June 21st, 2010
4:17 pm

My three would be:

(1.) Jesus – what do you think of mans desire to put a price on everything you created?

(2.) Harriet Tubman – how did you muster the courage to leave and then decided to come back to help others?

(3.) Christopher Columbus – did the indians you encountered in the “New World” ask for your immigration papers?

Bud Wiser

June 21st, 2010
4:18 pm

1. Benjamin Franklin

2. Richard M. Nixon

3. General George Patton

Cynthia Tucker

June 21st, 2010
4:19 pm

Hitler, Stalin and Mao. Every liberal’s heroes.

@@

June 21st, 2010
4:19 pm

jay, what makes you think they’d agree to have dinner with you?

Mine? Mary Magdalene, Winston Churchill, Thomas Aquinas, Samuel Clemens…

I could go on and on.

josef nix

June 21st, 2010
4:20 pm

I don’t think Jesus would accept…look at what happened the last time he went to supper…

Southern Comfort

June 21st, 2010
4:21 pm

josef @ 4:20

:lol:

@@

June 21st, 2010
4:21 pm

King David would be awesome. An Ordinary Man in Extraordinary Hands.

Bud Wiser

June 21st, 2010
4:21 pm

good one josef………

josef nix

June 21st, 2010
4:22 pm

DDR

Unmentionable said to tell you, “yeah, but them white boys sure are pretty!” :-)

kayaker 71

June 21st, 2010
4:22 pm

I see that none of you libs have chosen the Annointed One.

josef nix

June 21st, 2010
4:23 pm

SoCo
You know how much I’d like to be at your dinner party…!

Dave R.

June 21st, 2010
4:25 pm

Steve Allen – for laughs, entertainment and intelligent conversation. And to let him see how his Meeting of Minds concept worked in reality.

Thomas Jefferson – so he could finally settle the “Constitution is a living document” crap. :)

Teddy Roosevelt – so that Jefferson and I could slap the $hit out of him. :D

AmVet

June 21st, 2010
4:27 pm

No yacker but one of your boys picked Tricky Dick.

(Who might be OK for about 15 minutes as long as he didn’t have that anti-Semite Billy Graham with him!)

Lori

June 21st, 2010
4:28 pm

Leonardo DaVinci

Southern Comfort

June 21st, 2010
4:28 pm

josef

I could imagine pics of my dinner would start all kinds of trouble!!

Richard

June 21st, 2010
4:29 pm

If you invited Jesus, you’d have to ask one very important question: “So do you currently belong to a Jewish Temple or a Christian Church?”

josef nix

June 21st, 2010
4:29 pm

For us gay folks…

1. David–so, tell me more about Johnathan
2. Sappho–how’re we doing?
3. Alexander the Great–DADT?

DebbieDoRight

June 21st, 2010
4:29 pm

theyeshaveit

June 21st, 2010
4:31 pm

Peadawg said Did they have to be dead or could they still be alive?

Dead people are inherently more interesting. Think about it. Wouldn’t you want to ask, “Excuse me. How are you enjoying death?”

josef nix

June 21st, 2010
4:31 pm

Dave R
Unmentionable and I want to be in that slapping line!

SoCo
Can you imagine the conversation between those two? Methinks it would surprise a lot of us…

Ninja

June 21st, 2010
4:32 pm

Be excellent to each other.

itpdude

June 21st, 2010
4:36 pm

Jesus is an obvious choice.

For the other two? This probably varies depending on my mood, but Martin Luther and St. Thomas Aquinas quickly come to mind.

josef nix

June 21st, 2010
4:36 pm

JAY
Great topic! This is almost as good as Friday night for insights! And I wouldn’t turn down an invitation to your party…I’d be kinda interested in listening to Jefferson and Lincoln discussing the primacy of the constitution and something tells me it’d be a good thing to have Jesus there to refereree… :-)

godless heathen

June 21st, 2010
4:36 pm

Carl Sagan
Stephen Jay Gould
Albert Einstein

AmVet

June 21st, 2010
4:36 pm

Dead people are inherently more interesting. Think about it. Wouldn’t you want to ask, “Excuse me. How are you enjoying death?”

True, but you could always just ask Dick Cheney.

theyeshaveit

June 21st, 2010
4:36 pm

For me:

(1) My paternal grandfather, he taught me how to dream.
(2) My uncle Bill, he tried to teach me about time travel and the speed of light when I was eight.
(3) My maternal grandmother, because she told me that people would call her “Queen of the Valley” because she was so beautiful. :-)

Disgusted

June 21st, 2010
4:36 pm

1. Noah—so how did all these people get here if it was just you and your kids on that ark?

2. Rosemary Woods—was it really a mistake that got those minutes of tape erased?

3. Aristotle Onassis—so how much did she really spend after you married her?

Matti

June 21st, 2010
4:37 pm

“I see that none of you libs have chosen the Annointed One.”

Um, yes I did. I chose Jimi Hendrix, and you’re not invited.

theyeshaveit

June 21st, 2010
4:39 pm

AmVet, Ouch.

songbird

June 21st, 2010
4:39 pm

DebbieDoRight – lmao – priceless.

josef nix

June 21st, 2010
4:39 pm

Cynthia Tucker

In all seriousness, those three came to my mind and I AM a liberal…but can you get a pass from h3ll for this event… ?

kayaker 71

June 21st, 2010
4:40 pm

Also absent from the lib list of notables…… Jimmy Carter, Rhaem Emmanuel, Bill and Hillary Clinton, Jessie and Al, Queen Nancy and soon to be past Senator from Nevada, Maxine Waters, John Lewis….. the list goes on and on.

Dave R.

June 21st, 2010
4:42 pm

Of course, you’d be invited josef, as well as Unmentionable! :D

Captain Midnight

June 21st, 2010
4:43 pm

Elvis “The King”
Ruth “The Babe”
(probably woudn’t get much to eat with these two there)
Amelia Earhart so I could ask her what the hell happened to her.

josef nix

June 21st, 2010
4:44 pm

eyes
Family in history?
1. Machir the Babylon–see above
2. Guillaume de Nogaret–okay, what happened to the treasure, the chalice, and why didn’t you just go ahead and axe Benedict…
3. Manasseh ben Israel–did Spinoza pass his finals?
and over in the corner
Jean Louis de Nogaret de la Valette d’Epernon–just what DID you do for that Duchy and did Dumas get you right, D’Artagnan?

DebbieDoRight

June 21st, 2010
4:45 pm

If I had to pick someone “holy” from history, I’d try to pick someone who was a big influence on religion — but rooted in lots of propaganda — who was that guy who said “Grant me celibacy but not yet?” THAT would be my guest.

The biggest devil I’d pick would be the guy who invented “televangelism”.

Dave R.

June 21st, 2010
4:49 pm

“The biggest devil I’d pick would be the guy who invented “televangelism”.

Nah. For me it would be the guy who voice mail.

songbird

June 21st, 2010
4:52 pm

George Carlin, MLK and Einstein

Matti

June 21st, 2010
4:55 pm

Kayaker,

You think there are “lib” women out there who haven’t had dinner with Bill? heh… BTW, John Lewis brings very entertaining conversation to the dinner table! Why don’t you invite O’Reilly and y’all can grump and crab together all night about the declining morality of others. Since no one listens to the crusty ol’ poot pouch anymore, I’m sure he’s free most any night, as [most likely] are you.

Alvin Greene for Senate in SC

June 21st, 2010
4:57 pm

Louis Farrakhan

Rev. Jeremiah Wright

Glenn Beck.

That was easy.

Alvin Greene for Senate in SC

June 21st, 2010
5:00 pm

How about:

Tony Hayward

Bobby Jindal

Saddam Hussein

David S

June 21st, 2010
5:00 pm

Alexander Hamilton, Abraham Lincoln, Woodrow Wilson. If the dinner could alter history, a sound dose of food poisoning might make for a much more free 21st century america. Certainly a lot of unnecessary deaths could be prevented and likely 2 world wars.

Fred

June 21st, 2010
5:02 pm

Just damn Jay.

I don’t know offhand which three in ALL of History I would choose, but I doubt I could support my choices with the same good reasons you did. THAT was one hell of a group. Not because it was “one hell of a group” but for the reasons you stated. That was DEEP.

Nice blog entry.

Thom J: All about the rights of man. The common man. Man against the Gov’t…………. yet he owned slaves.

Honest Abe: Took him two years of war and a victory at Gettysburg before he freed the slaves. Yet he had the balls to see that war isn’t a “gentleman’s game” and told Grant to just crush the bastards and preserve the United States. But preserve a US where ALL men (and women) were free. Like MLK his followers lacked his vision and completely forgot the parts about reconciliation and no hate and all that stuff.

Funny thing that. Lincoln was the FIRST Republican President. He freed blacks, yet blacks vote almost at a 98 percentile like the crackers that oppressed them for nearly the next 100 years. The “old south” whites voted Democrat because Lincoln and the carpetbaggers after the war were Republicans. Strange wouldn’t you say?

JC: Since you are talking Bill and Ted’s Excellent adventure, you HAD to have him. He coined their phrase, albeit they updated it a tad to “Be excellent to one another.”

“Love your brother as you love yourself” IS a little dated isn’t it?

But yes, Jesus WAS a radical wasn’t he? His past time was to go to church on a Sunday (figuratively speaking that Sunday part) and stir up crap with the religious leaders. He tested their hypocrisy with a few simple questions didn’t he? If a “modern day Jesus” were to appear, the Baptists would crucify them as THEY are the modern day Sadducees or Pharisee’s.

Very interesting choices JB.

m

June 21st, 2010
5:03 pm

Jesus, Mary and Joseph

3 names

June 21st, 2010
5:04 pm

Julius Caesar, Napoleon, and John Lennon

Dusty

June 21st, 2010
5:08 pm

Awwwwww come on!.

Nobody wants to go to Burger King. So it’s me, myself and I. Three whoppers please.

David

June 21st, 2010
5:08 pm

Jay, that’s not a very diverse group. You should be ashamed that you didn’t include at least one woman or person of color.

Alvin Greene for Senate in SC

June 21st, 2010
5:09 pm

Glenn Beck, Rahm Emanuel and The Pope.

Doggone/GA

June 21st, 2010
5:10 pm

no one. I’d be FAR more interested in what Paul talked about: seeing the past unroll like a movie

Dusty

June 21st, 2010
5:17 pm

No no alvin greene,

NOT Tony Hayward. JASON HEYWARD

When he hits another homer for the Braves, I will personally set him up to a whopper at Burger King. He deserves the best!!

Scout

June 21st, 2010
5:17 pm

Jay:

Excellent choices. Mine would probably have been:

Moses
Washington
Jesus

BTW: Even as a 12 year old, Jesus astounded the religious rulers in the Temple by His knowledge and questions. So, if your party ever does occur, make sure you ask Him His thoughts on Who Isaiah Chapter 53 is referring to.

Union

June 21st, 2010
5:18 pm

my dinner would not be too exciting.. mainly to bring closure and have some answers… so..

1. engineer to one of the pharaohs.. how did they build those pyramids.
2. someone from easter island… where did those statues come from..
3. a mayan.. no so much because of the calendar.. just want to know where they all went..

I Report (-: You Whine )-: mmm, mmmm, mmmmm! Just sayin...

June 21st, 2010
5:19 pm

And Jesus because, questions of godhood aside, his philosophy and teachings were so far ahead of his time and place, and so far ahead of our own as well, as to be extraordinary.

Hear the Word of God, heathens-

I am the way and the truth and the life. No one comes to the Father except through me John 4:16

He was good teacher but just a little kooky, eh, kookman?

@alvin

June 21st, 2010
5:20 pm

So Alvin are you thinking Haywood would supply the Holy Oil to Jindal so he could exorcise Saddam’s demons?

Alvin Greene for Senate in SC

June 21st, 2010
5:20 pm

lol dusty. Kawakami needs to start looking for his little sword.

I'm Rick James b-tch!

June 21st, 2010
5:24 pm

Rahm Emanuel, Dick Cheney and someone with Tourette Syndrome. Put it on pay-per-view with Vegas taking bets on who says “Go f–k yourself” the most.

josef nix

June 21st, 2010
5:24 pm

Union

The Maya are still there…want to talk to one? I’ll ask one of my students (top 5%, speaks, reads, and writes the language) if she’d consent to speak with you….

I Report (-: You Whine )-: mmm, mmmm, mmmmm! Just sayin...

June 21st, 2010
5:24 pm

I would set up meeting with George Patton, William Tecumseh Sherman and George Washington so we could all fondly remember the days when we slaughtered our avowed enemies instead kowtowing to their propaganda apparatus.

No sissies would be invited, just sayin…

I'm Rick James

June 21st, 2010
5:26 pm

Was that last comment in poor taste? Maybe I’ll have dinner with Dear Abby, Emily Post and Judith Martin

Dusty

June 21st, 2010
5:28 pm

Alvein greene,

Kawakami WON a game . He will soon be deserving a Whopper Jr. But no fries this time.

Union

June 21st, 2010
5:30 pm

josef.. i appreciate that.. i do. but are we talking the same mayans that more or less disappeared between 8 and 9 ad?

Alvin Greene for Senate in SC

June 21st, 2010
5:32 pm

@alvin

I betcha Saddam could plug the damn leak……

Tony Hayward gets Iraqi justice.

Bobby Jindal sends President Obama back to Chicago.

Union

June 21st, 2010
5:32 pm

bookman.. been ignoring everyone all day.. that was a good / easy topic.. you still in a bar watching futbol, having a black/tan?

AmVet

June 21st, 2010
5:35 pm

Kawakami WON a game.

???

Maybe in your parallel reality, but not in the major leagues.

Andy, they’d just stomp you and feed you to the dogs.

josef nix

June 21st, 2010
5:35 pm

Rick James

I’d like to be at your party!

IR/YW

And I’ll make sure you’re at my party just for you…

1. Yael
2. General Patrick Cleburne
3. Alexander the Great

Billy O

June 21st, 2010
5:36 pm

Jay….you might really be suprised that TJ knew exactly who JC was…..and is.

Urban Republican

June 21st, 2010
5:36 pm

Jay:

I agree with you about Jesus and Lincoln, and I would add Harriett Tubman. All three had a hand in making this country the greatest on earth.

President Lincoln and Harriett Tubman’s honest dialogue about race changed our country from America to “U.S.”