The alien threat to our American way of life
Follow the blog on TWITTER
Apollo 14 astronaut Edgar D. Mitchell, the sixth man ever to walk on the moon, has a message for all citizens of Earth: We are not alone.
“We are being visited,” the 79-year-old grandfatherly “spacefarer” told 100 or so UFOlogists gathered at a National Press Club conference called by the Paradigm Research Group (motto: “It’s not about lights in the sky; it’s about lies on the ground”).
“It is now time to put away this embargo of truth about the alien presence,” said the astronaut who made the longest moonwalk in history. “I call upon our government to open up … and become a part of this planetary community that is now trying to take our proper role as a spacefaring civilization.”
With a new, perhaps more intellectually curious president in the White House, UFOlogists say, the time is ripe for the United States to follow the lead of other nations and release all classified files about government interaction with extraterrestrial beings. In fact, PRG founder Stephen Bassett demands that the Obama administration dump the documents, and quick.
“If it does not disclose, by the end of May — this is not a threat or anything, you don’t threaten the United States government, they’re heavily armed — the PRG has an enormous and substantial network, and quite a bit of documentary evidence connected to this, particularly politically … and we are going to be extensively putting that out to the media, and we’re just going to make it as difficult on them as possible,” Mr. Bassett said.”
A lot of people talk about illegal immigration, but they don’t know the half of it. My fellow Earth People, THIS is illegal immigration on a planetary scale! Extraterrestials are pouring into our cities and towns at this very moment, stealing government services while paying no taxes whatsoever, trying to change our culture from within and bringing strange and exotic diseases with them, all in a secret plot to reclaim what they call Planet Aztlan.
How can we spot these creatures from outer space, alien beings that would otherwise walk among us unnoticed? According to experts at the Spare-A-Dime Research Group, here are the top five clues to spotting an alien:
1.) When confronted about their place of birth, they suddenly become evasive and try to change the subject, refusing to provide the proper government certificates. Often they will claim to have been born in some place so weird that it becomes impossible to verify their claim. Like France. Or Indonesia. Or Kenya. Or Hawaii.
2.) They exert strange powers over the minds of human beings — for example, in at least one documented case a suspected extraterrestial has been able to drive an entire opposing political party entirely around the bend.
3.) Their mother ship sends them orders about what to say and do here on Earth through an advanced device known in their language as a “TelePrompter.”
4.) They apparently take their concept of American domestic life from TV broadcasts that they monitored from space back in 1950s and 1960s. Based on shows such as “Ozzie and Harriet” and “Leave it to Beaver,” they try to fit in by creating “families” with two “parental units” and two adorable “children,” even going so far as to adopt a “dog.” Being aliens, they fail to understand that by being so “normal” they become abnormal, because no real Americans live like that anymore.
5.) Here’s your final clue:
Be frightened, my fellow Earth People. They walk among us.
Tell us what you think about the site
Customer Care »
Vacation stops, manage subscriptions and more
AJC Services
Sections
Other Editions
Guides
Visitor Agreement | Privacy Statement
© 2011 The Atlanta Journal-Constitution
116 comments Add your comment
jt
April 29th, 2009
8:04 am
Of course there are aliens. They are just smart enough to stay the H#ll away from a planet inhabited by Chuck Norris.
I Report/ You Whine
April 29th, 2009
8:04 am
Those aren’t space aliens, those are moonbats!
Oh wait, what’s the difference?
You got a point.
Mrs. Godzilla
April 29th, 2009
8:12 am
This explains Michelle Bachmann!
Davo
April 29th, 2009
8:16 am
From the survey….
31: Please share with us any additional comments or feedback regarding how we can improve our website.
If the AJC is serious about making money, a good start would be a complete overhaul of your editorial staff. Tucker has national aspirations and is likely on the way out…Bookman has nothing going for him and should be showed to the door. His abilities as a ‘journalist’ fail to rise above the common blogger day after day. While Wootens departure is overdue it is welcome as is Bob Barrs addition to your blogs.
Submitted with satisfaction…best online poll I’ve ever taken.
ByteMe
April 29th, 2009
8:24 am
Well, that explains a lot.
Susan Myers
April 29th, 2009
8:24 am
I no longer doubt alien beings – a loud mouthed alien from somewhere with the name Rush Limbaugh pollutes the airwaves with alien bluster that is not of this earth.
RB from Gwinnett
April 29th, 2009
8:34 am
Thats nice Jay. Take a serious subject (Obama’s origin of birth) and make a mockery of the issue and belittle anyone who has the curiosity to wonder why a man would spend millions of dollars to hide a document he could just show to the world for free. I’ve asked you this question once before, Jay, and you keep choosing to ignor it, but how much would you spend to hide your birth certificate if it was required for you to keep your job and you had nothing to hide? Can you answer the question, Jay, or will you continue to swoop in and crap on your readers when they toss you a softball. Do you even have the courage to debate your writings, Jay?
Jay, the rational man has to wonder if you have nothing to hide, why would you? And spend millions to do it.
But then expecting rational thought from the offices of the AJC is irrational in itself.
Mrs. Godzilla
April 29th, 2009
8:44 am
Spent millions of dollars to hide birth certificate????
Love to see the data on that.
TnGelding
April 29th, 2009
8:47 am
Great stuff. But to think we are the only living beings would be unimaginative.
Davo
April 29th, 2009
8:47 am
Real journalism here….
Prosecute ‘em!
by Jack Hunter on April 28, 2009
http://www.takimag.com/article/prosecute_em/
Copyleft
April 29th, 2009
8:50 am
Ha, ha! Funny stuff, Jay. Thanks for the chuckle.
jt
April 29th, 2009
8:59 am
Yeah well, if you had them special glasses and you looked at Obama, you wouldn’t be laughing.
Taxpayer
April 29th, 2009
9:02 am
Good job, Jay. I think you’ve made the wing-nuts moon-batty. Anyway, assuming Obama has a spaceship capable of traveling at the speed of light and he left his home planet, dressed as Ozzie, at the instant he received what we observe as 60 year-old shows, that would put his home plant about 30 light years away. That should narrow the search down some for a copy of his original birth certificate. Unless, they have star gate technology. Hmmm. We must know the truth and the truth is out there. I know. Tea Leoni told me. She overheard David talking to Gillian Anderson about it. I know it can be pure torture to hear this but it’s the truth. It is. Honest.
Joey
April 29th, 2009
9:03 am
Cute Jay. Not a belly laugh, but cute.
President Obama is no alien. It is much worse than that. He and Emanual and Pelosi and Reid and on and on are much to real. That reality represents an equally real threat to the Democratic Republic that I have had the pleasure of living in for 64 years?
And to you leftist beleivers, don’t waste your time suggesting that I leave. No way. I will be right here working to stop, then reverse this, as long as I am able.
Ray
April 29th, 2009
9:06 am
Bookman.
Your credibility as a “journalist” would be best served by leaving this sort of crap at the door. It just evokes the same old tired responses from the same old people who demonize everything that doesn’t fit into their narrow view of America and where we should be headed. Does the AJC hire you to stir the pot and keep this fire burning? Healthy debate doesn’t begin with this. No one’s mind is changed, no ones opinion is respected…. only demonic comments that serve no purpose except to keep your pathetic job alive.
Mrs. Godzilla
April 29th, 2009
9:06 am
Here’s some fun stuff….
President Reagan saw UFO, often spoke of a world united because of alien invasion
“”According to a White House transcript, Reagan remarked that during his 5-hour private discussions with Gorbachev, he told [Gorbachev] to think, “how easy his task and mine might be in these meetings that we held if suddenly there was a threat to this world from some other species from another planet outside in the universe. We’d forget all the little local differences that we have between our countries …” Except for one headline or two, people didn’t pay much attention. Not then and not later, when Gorbachev himself confirmed the conversation in Geneva during an important speech on February 17, 1987, in the Grand Kremlin Palace in Moscow, to the Central Committee of the USSR’s Communist Party”"
The whole thing here:
http://www.ufoevidence.org/documents/doc1738.htm
For the record….I believe we are not alone in the universe…. however, I’m doubtful that they are walking among us.
Reebok
April 29th, 2009
9:07 am
funny stuff. are coulter and hannity the arch enemy aliens from a parallel dimension? that would explain a lot…
RB from Gwinnett
April 29th, 2009
9:11 am
You might be right, Mrs. G. All those attorneys working OT to keep his birth certificate hidden may actually be doing it for free. I wonder if he’s reporting that on his taxes?
Mrs. Godzilla
April 29th, 2009
9:12 am
In other words RB, no data.
Nuff said.
RB from Gwinnett
April 29th, 2009
9:16 am
Gee, Mrs. G. I could spend hours digging for all the court cases being defended, look up the attorneys representing Obama, make a few inquiries into their billing rates, do some projections on billable hours (since I doubt they’ll share that with me) and come up with an estimate for you.
Or you could try thinking for a change.
Stan
April 29th, 2009
9:18 am
So does this mean that the Government will NOT be releasing documentation about aliens?
Paul
April 29th, 2009
9:20 am
If we’re their food source, they’re gonna eat real well. That’s why they’ve been biding their time… plump up the herd….
… and I knew only aliens went to Harvard Law. Shoulda stuck with Yale grads -
Redneck Convert
April 29th, 2009
9:21 am
Well, I know good and well the people that live in the big house outside of Simpsons Trailer Park are aliens. One reason is because they won’t touch beer. They pay alot for fancy wine and sip it in a little glass with their little finger stuck up in the air. And they wouldn’t even think of using a cut-off barrel as a BBQ pit. They dress in fancy clothes and won’t even wave at you when you honk your horn when you pass by. I bet you couldn’t find a pair of blue jeans in their house unless it was a pair that had a fancy label and maybe cost a couple hundred bucks. They even put up a Obama/Biden sign last election. If that don’t prove they are aliens here in Forsyth County I don’t know what will. Nobody’s doing anything about them. I say they are a danger to our good GA way of life.
Taxpayer
April 29th, 2009
9:22 am
I’m not sure that the Fed has the authority to gather, compile or report on aliens, illegal or otherwise. It may be a state’s rights issue.
Mrs. Godzilla
April 29th, 2009
9:24 am
RB
Another option, you could do your homework before you shoot your mouth off!
AmVet
April 29th, 2009
9:29 am
Is this the political equivalent to “holes in the fossil record”?
Today’s Republiconned Party – non-evolved and going the way of the dodo.
Bosch
April 29th, 2009
9:30 am
I told you so. Cylons are real.
DB, Gwinnettian
April 29th, 2009
9:32 am
“Take a serious subject (Obama’s origin of birth)”
See, Jay, it’s hard to compete with stuff like this for pure comedy gold. but thanks for trying.
jt
April 29th, 2009
9:32 am
“If we’re their food source, they’re gonna eat real well.”
I disagree, the U.S. has more attorneys than any other country. Even aliens don’t like eating shiiat.
Paul
April 29th, 2009
9:36 am
Bosch
I knew you’d be the one to figure that out. Thead the other day on the monocular test, now this… Jays preparing us for the Truth.
Did you see Letterman? Had on Zachary Quinto (Sylar on Heroes, the new Spock) – but – they gave a prize to a woman in Rupert’s Deli and I swear one of the presenters is a double for Caprica Six.
Which means… the cloning has begun!
I can die a happy man…
Paul
April 29th, 2009
9:37 am
jt
Attorneys are aliens. They’re the ones who doctor the birth certificates. No other logical explanation.
Susan Myers
April 29th, 2009
9:43 am
The fact that we are here should be evidence enough that there are others in this vast universe. But walking among us, no.
Midori
April 29th, 2009
9:52 am
Take a serious subject (Obama’s origin of birth) and make a mockery of the issue and belittle anyone who has the curiosity to wonder why a man would spend millions of dollars to hide a document he could just show to the world for free.
you mean like GW Bush’s TANG records, RB?
Davo: how many times do you intend to post that silly questionnaire crap? What purpose does it serve?
Paul
April 29th, 2009
9:54 am
Susan Myers
That’s really good news. If they were, it’d be proof positive. Then we’d have to figure out what God really looks like. And we’d havta redo the Sistine Chapel, and museums would have big problems, and fundamentalists would be confused, and Moslems would be really, really ticked….
But Buddhists and New Age thinkers would continue serenely on.
Doggone/GA
April 29th, 2009
9:55 am
Let’s see…if the universe is infinitely large, with an infinite number of solar systems that must mean there’s an infinite number of planets orbiting an infinite number of suns…in just the right orbit to have an infinite number of chances of evolving intelligent species. Sounds right to me.
jt
April 29th, 2009
9:55 am
Nancy Grace maybe.
AmVet
April 29th, 2009
9:57 am
James Carville, via Newsmax:
“What seems to be escaping notice is just how serious the problems of the Republican Party as a whole are for the long term. It’s not just a Bush thing, and it’s not just about Republican prospects in 2010, 2012, or 2014…”
Grim stuff for the short or long term, but Carville recounts that in his conversations with Republicans, nobody is disputing his dire assessment of the political reality.
In a nutshell, he concludes that the GOP is starved for credibility.
Carville writes that to understand the emergence of a lasting Democratic majority, one must first review the “profound and relentless incompetence” of the Bush administration – “and the pursuant collapse of the Republican Party.”
He suggests that this understanding requires a looking back at the failure of Republican ideas, “including a wholesale rejection of the myth of conservative superiority on the economy, and holding our noses long enough to survey the gallery of truly repellent scoundrels, scandals, and screw-ups that the Republican Party has been responsible for over the last eight years.”
Very succinctly he makes the argument for why Democrats are going to keep winning — Two words: young people. “In short, the Republicans are going to keep getting spanked again and again for forty more years because we’re right and they’re wrong, and Americans know it.”
However, despite the boon of the alleged GOP incompetence, the Democratic Party will not be able to simply glide along on the voter backlash or its laurels. The road to perpetual victory is, according to the pundit, “to rebuild Americans’ trust in government as a force of good.”
All very serious stuff in this Simon and Schuster offering, but along the way, Carville has fun with the likes of Sarah Palin for once running an Alaskan city hall that “looks just like a Louisiana bait shop.”
Always a big target, Bill O’Reilly is lambasted as stupid, bigoted, and “remarkably nasty, even for a far-right nut job.”
That last observation will make most, other than the Cracker Factor fans themselves, chuckle…
N.J,
April 29th, 2009
10:02 am
Yeah, about 30 years ago, the aliens sent their advance shock troops to take over talk radio, advise cuts to higher education and social programs, destroy education in math and the sciences and so weaken the strongest and most advanced nation on earth so no resistance to their full scale invasion would be possible..
Paul
April 29th, 2009
10:02 am
Doggone GA
[[in just the right orbit to have an infinite number of chances of evolving intelligent species.]]
So, do ya think it happened at least once?
AmVet
Carville thinks someone else is remarkably nasty? Maybe that’s why BOR gets along so well with Carville’s wife every time he has her on his show.
Personally, I like the portrayal of Carville in Primary Colors. Now there’s a fun movie -
jt
April 29th, 2009
10:06 am
“The road to perpetual victory is, according to the pundit, “to rebuild Americans’ trust in government as a force of good.”
Lenin would agree.
jt
April 29th, 2009
10:08 am
Start them in pre-school.
Have faith in the “Five-year” plans.
Disregard 2000 years of history.
We’re here to help.
N.J,
April 29th, 2009
10:08 am
Actually Ronald Reagans own appointee to the office of Comptroller General, when giving his report on the Reagan Administration, the only report in which a comptroller general ever criticized a president in the entire history of that agency, stated almost the same. That Reagan had almost destroyed the United States by attacking government as the cause of all America’s problems, rather than American government as a force for good. The most harmful factor being the inconsistance of the right in asserting that the same government that is bad when it provides social services for its citizens is still good when it is attacking other nations.
There is a vast inconsistancy in trying to assert that our “big government” is good and then insisting that we impose the same sort of government on the rest of the world by use of military threat or outright military attack. One would think that the right is so militaristic because they want to spread the misery in the form of their much spoken of “liberty”
jt
April 29th, 2009
10:10 am
Perpetual victory IS perpetual glory. Glory to the homeland.
AmVet
April 29th, 2009
10:11 am
Yeah, Paul, two peas in a pod.
It strikes me though how the oracles of the right – HeadRush, Mann Coulter, Pretty Boy Sean, ad nauseum – must be loving life under the Uppity One.
They have their devoted base of mulatto-loathers and liberal haters, so their ratings are assured to remain strong for four (eight, twelve, sixteen…?) more years.
Sadly, that emasculated gang is going to get them nowhere near the White House, Capitol Hill or most state houses for, it would appear, a long, long spell.
The irrefutable fact is there is no going back. And that is just about the only thing the reactionary wing of the GOP is capable of doing – looking backwards…
Doggone/GA
April 29th, 2009
10:11 am
“So, do ya think it happened at least once?”
Well, if you consider Earth formed humans to be intelligent…it did happen once.
RB from Gwinnett
April 29th, 2009
10:13 am
Midori, I don’t believe serving in the TANG is a requirement to be President. Besides, what information about his service there do you feel the need to know and why?
Mrs G. If you’d care to debate why the man continues to defend the issue in court vs. showing the birth certificate, then please offer up something relevant (for a change). You seem to want to debate whether or not I can find factual evidence of private billing records from a variety of Law firms, none of which are public domain, but all of which are relatively understood by rational thinking people. For what point? Even if it’s $1,000 Mrs. G, would you spend the money vs. showing the document if you had nothing to hide?
Red
April 29th, 2009
10:13 am
Here’s the thing about the Obama’s origin of birth fallacy that astounds me: as badly as Clinton wanted the nomination, do you not think her legions and minions would have uncovered any ineligibility of Obama to be President during the primary? Seriously, the Clintons are smear and takedown perfectionists.
But whatever, enjoy your paranoia wingnuts…
Kamchak
April 29th, 2009
10:13 am
Paul
Not only the the right orbit but also the right star. Most visible stars are too hot for a water based life form. Assuming that water boils/evaporates at universally recognized temperatures/pressures.
jt
April 29th, 2009
10:13 am
NJ- You are correct on your 10:06
How do YOU fight it? You are a proponent of the SAME people that were RULING you during Reagans years.
Come on dude, get a clue.
Mrs. Godzilla
April 29th, 2009
10:15 am
The road to perpetual victory is, according to the pundit, “to rebuild Americans’ trust in government as a force of good.”
George Washington would agreee
Thomas Jefferson would Agree
John Adams would agree
James Madison would agree
etc etc
only a FOOL would want the opposite.