Faced with tuition bills, more GSU and UGA students turning to “Sugar Daddies”
When I received this email about a “dating” service that matches up wealthy older (mostly) men with young, cash-starved college students, more and more who attend Georgia schools, I thought it was a spoof.
A service where attractive young college students pay their bills and buy their “Fendi” bags by “dating” wealthy men sounded like a Lifetime movie.
I was wrong.
Apparently, there is a nationwide online service that matches “Sugar Daddies” with “Sugar Babies,” many of whom are college students exchanging their youth, beauty and attention, sexual and otherwise, for cash and other expressions of gratitude from wealthy men in what the company calls “mutually beneficial” relationships.
SeekingArrangement.com has received a lot of press, including a 2009 opus in The New York Times Magazine in which founder Brandon Wade explains, “We stress relationships that are mutually beneficial. We ask people to really think about what they want in a relationship and what they have to offer. That kind of upfront honesty is a good basis for any relationship.” (Please read the Times story if you have time as it is quite extraordinary.)
Wade told the Times that Sugar Babies — mostly young women — outnumber Sugar daddies 10 to 1, prompting one of the daddies to describe the dating service as “the best fishing hole I ever fished in.”
According to the Times:
ABOUT 30 PERCENT OF ARRANGEMENTS on the site involve the daddy paying an “allowance,” usually a thousand or two a month, though the site claims some reach $10,000. The rest provide the baby with incidental cash, shopping sprees, gifts, travel or the fleeting illusion that theirs is a high-end, easy life. “I get flown to whatever city I want,” wrote a North Carolina college student, who goes by the name gurlnextdoor on the site’s blog, a mix between an online support group and a kaffeeklatsch. “He pays for it, takes me shopping, we talk, laugh, go out to eat and do whatever we want to do for our days together. . . . I don’t bring up mundane problems about my home life, and he does the same. . . . If I wanted someone to talk to about my life problems, I’d get a boyfriend or a therapist.”
Some {Sugar babies} are looking for attention, some have financial problems and some are seeking refuge from romantic pain. On the blog and in conversations with me, still others said benefactors provide a way to get the extras they want — the Fendi bags, the to-die-for shoe collection or the breast enhancement. A surprising number of babies say on the blog that they don’t need the money at all, either because they have decent-paying jobs or bottomless credit cards from their parents. What appeals to them about the arrangements are the expensive gifts — “I just LOVE being spoiled,” gushed one 19-year-old woman on the blog — because those gifts make them feel valued, as if the money spent measures just how desirable they are.Other women on the site would happily forfeit conspicuous prizes and go for the cash instead, especially for tuition. One woman’s profile says, “That you can help me get through school and achieve financial stability through support and mentoring is more important than wowing me with diamonds and Prada.” In fact, Seeking Arrangement pays to have its ads pop up on search engines whenever someone types in “student loan,” “tuition help,” “college support” or “help with rent.” Lola was one of many to stumble on the site that way, when — behind on her rent and tuition and down to one meal a day — she Googled “student loan.” What popped up was hardly what she expected, but she was willing to try almost anything to stay in school.
I am sharing this on the Get Schooled blog because SeekingArrangement.com just released a list of the colleges attended by its student Sugar Babies. The No. 1 fastest growing source of new babies is Georgia State University. The University of Georgia is also on the list of increasingly fertile ground. Read about it on AJC.com.
(Maybe, those HOPE Scholarships cuts are to blame?)
Here is what SeekingArrangement.com sent me:
As the cost of living rises and tuition hikes continue, college students are forced to look for alternative methods to raise an enormous amount of funds in order to pursue their education. Some choose to take out student loans, or receive help from their parents, and other students are turning to Sugar Daddies.
SeekingArrangement.com is releasing its annual list of the “Top 20 Fastest Growing Sugar Baby Colleges of 2012″ this week. Last year, college student memberships increased by 58 percent on the mutually beneficial relationship website, with more students from the South joining than any other region. The average co-ed Sugar Baby receives approximately $3,000 a month in allowances and gifts from her Sugar Daddy, enough to cover tuition and living expenses at most schools.
The following is the list of the Top 20 Fastest Growing Sugar Baby Schools, by new sign ups in 2012:
1. Georgia State University 292
2. New York University 285
3. Temple University 268
4. University of Central Florida 221
5. University of Southern Florida 212
6. Arizona State University 204
7. Florida International University 187
8. University of Georgia 148
9. Indiana University 131
10. Texas State 128
11. Kent State University 123
12. Penn State 121
13. University of North Texas 112
14. Florida State University 111
15.Tulane University 109
16. Michigan State University 108
17. University of Ohio 103
18. Columbia University 100
19. University of Alabama 96
20. University of California Los Angeles 91“It’s tough. The South went from being the epitome of success and money to faring the worst in terms of well-being,” says founder and CEO, Brandon Wade. “Even if NYU is still our biggest Sugar Baby University, the growth of Southern female coeds seeking the Sugar Lifestyle is a move in the right direction to bring back Southern charm.”
One other Georgia school made the list, coming in at No. 8, the University of Georgia had 1.5 more new sign-ups this year than in 2011. The No. 1 school, Georgia State by 3.9 times more, had 292 new signs-up this year. While Georgia Southern University did not make it in the top 20, the school also showed an increase in Sugar Baby sign-ups this year.
Georgia Sugar Schools by new sign-ups and increase in memberships in 2012:
Georgia State University 292 sign-ups 395% increase in sign ups
University of Georgia 148 sign-ups 95% increase in sign ups
Georgia Southern University 76 sign-ups 102% increase in sign ups
–From Maureen Downey, for the AJC Get Schooled blog
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76 comments Add your comment
TheGoldenRam
January 14th, 2013
5:52 pm
None of this is new, except for the visibility of it that comes from it being an internet business. My alma mater, Florida State University, is on that list. When I was an undergrad student fifteen years ago, I knew of escort services and prostitution rings comprised exclusively of college coeds. I knew some of the girls. I also knew some of the johns from having been raised in the town. I understand it. It’s an issue as old as humanity. I’ve never been inclined to engage the services of a prostitute. I’ve always felt that I would feel like a loser for ‘paying for it”. However, as a 39 yr-old single man, I’ve also dated much longer than most of my married friends and that presents me with more varied and more ‘generally accepted’ social options. Honestly, sometimes you get the vibe you’re ‘paying for it’ in conventional relationships anyway. Especially when you know a person that set you up might have dropped the line, “and he has money”. It takes a while to even begin to truly understand someone and their motivations.
Most of the men I know that indulge in this behavior are married. Some with kids, some without. Speaking as someone with an anthropology degree, I honestly don’t think nature intended for human beings to be exclusive and monogamous. I don’t think we are wired that way. Marriage is a social construct and a very important one at that. A good one conveys social & economic benefits to the parties; especially the children. Resources, status, stability, knowledge, etc.. What it often doesn’t do is fulfill the inherent sexual needs/desires of the adults in those relationships. I think prostitution is an outlet for that. I don’t think that should be illegal. I know too many people that exist in “loveless” marriages. Great houses, great cars, great kids, great schools and some really boring marriages. Should they give up that collective stability so that one or both of the adults can pursue a completely normal human need that is missing from their existing lives? Some would certainly say yes, but I don’t believe that. I think most of the outrage directed at stories like this is artificial. People know better. They know this is part of the human experience.
Private Citizen
January 14th, 2013
5:53 pm
Devil’s Advocate, Whatever happened to people working for themselves, starting their own business in a competitive market? Innovation, value, competition. It’s like you’re describing educated peasants or something.
Private Citizen
January 14th, 2013
6:15 pm
GoldenRam (?) (odd name, you must think you’re pretty hot stuff), When Americans speak of these topics, they sound like they are inventing philosophy. What about the recent government officials who get called out with their lovers and then want to publicly apologise, as if anyone wants to hear it and cares. It is like they are stricken with child mind. There’s a lot of that in the U. S., these governing adults who act like children about everything. Seriously, it is like the government is enforcing arrested development syndrome. Recent examples of weird politicians who do not know how to manage their love life: military general Petraus who was seduced in a classic “honey pot” scheme to discredit him, then the woman dumped him and he cried like a baby about it via email. Checkmate. And then the governor from South Carolina who had a lover in South America, businesswoman, they looked like a pretty good match. So what does he do? Public apologises to everyone and humiliates both the wife, who must hate him now, and the lover, too, who must think he is child-mind American idiot. And everybody knows Hillary Clinton has a lover, but that fiasco with Bill and the woman who was sent to seduce him is turned into a national topic, as if anyone cares. In any of these cases an adult would say, “What business of yours is my love life? Buzz off.” Was it Jacques Chirac, at state dinners his wife sat on one side of him and his lover sat on the other side of him. Plenty of places in europe if a marriage goes cold, they do not split up the family and play trauma drama. And let’s not even get to Japan, that makes this college tuition exploit look positively beginner. But if you’re not Japanese they do not want you there, either. Oh wow! hey this is news. I can not believe someone posted this whole thing online. http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=iMTqmi7tatI I searched out and bought the DVD and it was some weird codec (from Japan), impossible to duplicate. This is a real event that someone put this online. Two and half hours well spent for anyone who likes culture and art. And it’s all written from a high school teacher perspective…
UGA Grad
January 14th, 2013
6:22 pm
Funny Georgia Tech not even mentioned
Lee
January 14th, 2013
6:55 pm
Nothing new here, except the use of an internet site.
Anna Nicole Smith, any number of Hugh Hefner’s “girlfriends”, the infamous Hollywood “casting couch”, rock star groupies, heck, even Keith Richards has dated a few “lookers”. Need I go on?
As distasteful as this is, it is between adults.
—————————————
Old joke:
Man to lady: Would you have sex with me for a million dollars?
Lady: Well, I suppose so.
Man: How about $50?
Lady: (indignant) What do you think I am?
Man: We’ve already established that. Now, we’re just negotiating the price.
bootney farnsworth
January 14th, 2013
7:36 pm
I’ve been aware of this for some time. IMO disgusting, but its their lives and bodies. I just hope they don’t bring themselves to free clinics or ERs to deal with their STDs.
gotta love capitalism.
Hermione
January 14th, 2013
7:43 pm
On the list is “University of Ohio” which does not exist. Makes me wonder if this is for real.
Matthew Blue
January 14th, 2013
8:44 pm
After my divorce, after a long term marriage of 25+ years, and yes I was totally faithful all those years, I started dating younger women, not exclusively though. I live in an area surrounded by several universities and two of them are all women institutions. Just as a lark, I put an ad in craigslist looking for a sugarbaby. I was basically astounded at the amount of replies, and yes I decided to look into some of them. What I found was the money was a small part of it, because believe me what I offered was no where near what those on this website offered. More than one young lady said she was also looking for mentorship and that the money also was a help of course. But more than anything I think the girls were looking for a father figure and someone that treated them with respect, which I did. Of course this was not always the case and really it is what it is–prostitution, and I say this realizing that I am certainly no better than them, possibly worse as the solicitor. I do feel sleazy about it at times but I must admit it is quite exciting and definitely almost always gratifying. Many times I was also contacted by older women and some of them married that were very interested in the proposition. So now I have put myself out there so “have at it”……
Private Citizen
January 14th, 2013
9:03 pm
Mini Essay: The Seductive University Student
One time I studied with a professor who was the top person in the field. Anyway, in one class, this chick sits on the front row and is looking at him like she was a tiger ready to pounce on something she liked. Meanwhile, professor did not even look at her or provide any social currency in return for the theatrics. Interesting lesson from someone who knows what they’re doing (the prof). Not only did he not mix it up, he didn’t flirt with mixing it up either or even dignify the routine with any attention.
On a different note, I recall when they made a Hollywood movie of some book and Time magazine or Newsweek or People magazine or whatever called up this one professor who was an authority on the book and wanted him to comment for their magazine. He plainly told them, “No thanks.” (and don’t call back.) That’s “blue blood” is what that is.
Private Citizen
January 14th, 2013
9:05 pm
(speaking of two different people)(not the same professor)
yeahmon
January 14th, 2013
10:04 pm
so what? this has been going on in some form or another since the beginning of time.
Digger
January 14th, 2013
10:21 pm
I think every one of these girls needs a good spanking.
AnonMom
January 14th, 2013
10:57 pm
I think that we have a backwards society in many respects… I think theirs too much violence — hence we have Newtowns and Auroras — we watch Hollywood shoot folks left, right and center and don’t complain about it at all. Sex, though, and everyone is all over it. “Shades of Grey” has brought the topic a bit more out in the open. Janet Jackson shows a bit in public and is excommunicated — how dare she… In Europe? No tops necessary — in public. Yes — just what is the oldest profession on the planet? Where did monogamy really come from (and no, I have no interest in exploring these things for me, for my husband or buy sons or nephews but I think there’s merit to allowing prostitution to be legal between consenting adults and to being regulated; I think we need to be more open about these topics and I t hunk that this whole situation is very backwards…..). America is too puritan on some of these fronts — not so much on others (we need more kids born to 2 parents — so we need much more birth control;…..)…….
AnonMom
January 14th, 2013
10:59 pm
fyi – in Pompeii — there’s a whore-house from pre 76 AD with positions and prices that can be seen if you go to that part of Italy — it doesn’t look so comfy — very hard surfaces and very narrow and lots of beds to a room but absolutely fascinating… Pompeii was a sailor’s town back then.
Look at the Sugar Fall---...Wait, Wrong Sugar | The Lady Sportswriter
January 15th, 2013
6:28 am
[...] Now, I’ve heard of using your feminine wiles, but this is ridiculous. [...]
redweather
January 15th, 2013
6:51 am
Is prostitution the issue here or simply good old fashioned stupidity?
AnonMom
January 15th, 2013
9:22 am
redweather — maybe a bit of both — maybe it’s a should they be able to sell what they want to sell at the price they’ve agreed to sell it? Maybe it should be more of a discussion about how careful they are being about what they are doing — are they preventing pregnancy; are they being treated well; are they cared for? Is it really voluntary? Are they all over the age of consent? How many of the sugar daddies/mommies are married? Is anyone doing things in same gender situations that they aren’t interested in doing? Are they being forced into more than 2 things they aren’t interested in? There are plenty of questions that arise from the scenario but should they be allowed to “sell” what they want to “sell” to a willing purchaser at the price they want to sell it for isn’t necessarily one of them. Maybe getting into why they feel so compelled to sell is one… maybe that dovetails into why prices of some of these schools have escalated so much faster than tuition (I know Emory isn’t on on the list but in the 60s its tuition/fees etc was about $3k; in the 80s its was $8k and now it’s $40k — this is per year — that increase can’t be explained away by inflation). So plenty of questions that could be asked….
AnonMom
January 15th, 2013
9:23 am
not tuition in last sentence… inflation. sorry
Imaho Fosale
January 15th, 2013
11:28 am
If there are any Sugar Momma’s out there looking for a 55-year old, overweight, balding married man, for “companionship”, let me know. Only $3,000.00/month!!
HS Public Teacher
January 15th, 2013
11:47 am
@Devil’s Advocate – You use Monster.com to represent all open jobs? Not good. Many jobs and job categories do not advertise on Monster.com. It is not a good representation of ALL jobs in the marketplace.
Private Citizen
January 15th, 2013
1:46 pm
AnonMom, the workload at schools like Emory does not allow enough time for doing tricks on the side. One time was comparing undergraduate course syllabi from different universities. The amount of materials covered and density of texts from schools like Princeton and Harvard was absolutely head-numbing, about 4x the work of medium grade schools.
Of course, I do not not what is the deal with half of the Harvard graduates going to work in finance. It seems like they’ve had a conceptual breakdown with their mission and are turning the best and the brightest into predators, not producers.
Private Citizen
January 15th, 2013
1:47 pm
Same reason you do not see Georgia Tech on this exploit. No extra time for such activity.
Private Citizen
January 15th, 2013
1:48 pm
As the Japanese governing person said, maybe USA could do with a few less financial engineers and a few more engineering engineers.
As Media Dissects The Atlantic/Scientology Mess, College Prostitution Website Ad Makes “News” | Wizbang
January 15th, 2013
4:10 pm
[...] pay their tuition, they don’t just simply exchange sex for money, its much more complicated.”The Atlanta Journal Constitution actually shared the PR e-mail they got from the site on their education blog, in addition to [...]
Truth in Moderation
January 15th, 2013
6:35 pm
Thanks for the wonderful topic MAUREEN. Jesus’ message of repentance and hope is not welcome, but perverted, denigrating, comments aimed at women are. Nice.
“Lady: (indignant) What do you think I am?
Man: We’ve already established that. Now, we’re just negotiating the price.”
“Emory does not allow enough time for doing tricks on the side.”
“If there are any Sugar Momma’s out there looking for a 55-year old, overweight, balding married man, for “companionship”, let me know. Only $3,000.00/month!!”
” in Pompeii — there’s a whore-house from pre 76 AD with positions and prices that can be seen if you go to that part of Italy — it doesn’t look so comfy — very hard surfaces and very narrow and lots of beds to a room but absolutely fascinating… Pompeii was a sailor’s town back then.”
jed
January 28th, 2013
5:03 am
so since it involves rich white men and college-aged women (the two most entitled groups in america), it doesnt qualify as prostitution? that right there tells you everything you need to know about america. meanwhile, poor black women trying to feed their kids are arrested immediately for doing the exact same thing. there are definitely two americas, and one of them is a bunch of hypocrites.