Newtown shooting demands we consider our “call of duty” as parents
Snow-covered stuffed animals with photos attached sit at a memorial in Newtown, Conn. On Dec. 14, Adam Lanza walked into Sandy Hook Elementary School in Newtown and opened fire, killing 26, including 20 children, before killing himself. (AP Photo/Craig Ruttle)
I admire Fred Assaf, head of Pace Academy in Atlanta, because he doesn’t shy away from the tough issues. Here is another example of his willingness to speak out on behalf of children.
In the wake of the Newtown school shooting, Assaf questions the popularity of violent video games, which many kids received as Christmas gifts last week.
Please note that all comments to the blog will be moderated and appear only after they are read and approved.
By Fred Assaf
Because I come to know 6-year-olds every year by having lunch with them in our Lower School, I know the boundless joy and optimism they have in the heart. They raise their hands when they don’t know the answer. When they run out of knock-knock jokes they know, the make up more on the spot.
They still need help opening their milk cartons. They look forward to holidays, visiting cousins, and seeing grandparents. They love their teachers, crave the structure of a school setting, and are learning to read fast and compute math at an incredible pace.
They will laugh at all of your jokes, even when they aren’t funny. They understand the needs of those around them, they play with all their classmates, and they respect their parents, their teachers, and their god.
I’m headmaster at an independent school in Atlanta. Our school begins in Pre-First (Kindergarten) and ends with 12th grade. My wife and I also have five children of our own. The events in Newtown, Conn., are unimaginable to us and our entire prayer is for sympathy and healing; there is no justice in a situation like this.
It is my tradition to have lunch with the Pre-First students (they are 5 and 6). In so doing I remind myself about my vocation and come to know the boundless energy and potential of children. It is why I teach. I know more Knock-Knock jokes than any adult my age and I like it!
And I’m plagued now by this thought — who shoots 6-year-olds? Because I lead a school I’m always searching for answers, finding a new path forward, and engineering compromise. But this idea of shooting 6-year-olds doesn’t compute; I’m not in search of a motive, as it cannot possibly explain why.
When we had our first child, our family doctor gave us a good piece of advice: “Eskimo children get used to the cold.” As parents we understood that our attitudes and behaviors would shape our children. Though all five of our sons are different, they are shaped by our values and behaviors.
And so I wonder what behaviors we as parents can change. Certainly, we can improve school security. We can provide better training. We can make it harder to get a gun than to it is to get Sudafed. I don’t know all the political answers, but I’d favor anything that makes gratuitous murder more difficult.
Which brings me to my point. As parents, we need to do our best to stop our children from the desensitizing impact of video games. A quick survey of the most popular video games includes the following top 10 games: “Halo,” “Assassin’s Creed,” “Call of Duty,” “World of Warcraft,” “Grand Theft Auto.”
Each of these games, simply put, eats away at a child’s sensitivity toward killing. We have “gamified” the murder of people, and our children shoot, steal, and bomb in their virtual worlds. Like the basketball player who practices foul shots, we get better at things when we practice. Their habits become automatic, reactive, and second-nature.
Raising children is a labor of love. Working in a school is a joy. When I reflect on President Obama’s query to ask myself what we can do better as parents, educators, and communities — it seems to me that we can stop letting our children kill people over and over and over again — and call it a GAME.
If you know teenagers like I know teenagers, they will find other things to do once you take away their shooting games – perhaps they will even work on their free throws.
–from Maureen Downey, for the AJC Get Schooled blog
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109 comments Add your comment
Stoobie
January 2nd, 2013
12:21 pm
As a low-income single parent, I confess that I relied heavily on the electronic “Babysitter” of TV and Video games since I couldn’t afford decent day care for my two young sons. At least I knew where they were after school before I got home from work. That being said, parents need to pay attention to what their kids are doing with their spare time, and respond accordingly.
Games like “Halo,” “Assassin’s Creed,” “Call of Duty,” “World of Warcraft,” “Grand Theft Auto.” – These games are NOT for children! You wouldn’t buy your 7 year old a pack of cigarettes and a fifth of Scotch, Why on earth would you let them get their hands on violent video games and movies before they are old enough to understand the difference between real life and fantasy? Back then, my kids played “violent” video games like Mortal Combat and Shinobi Warrior, and I was soundly criticized for letting them do it. The two video games that I eventually banned forever from my household, however, were “Micro Machines” racing game, and “Marble Madness” because my kids always ended up arguing and fighting over them in REAL LIFE! It wasn’t their exposure to violence that caused them to fight with each other, it was the frustration and helplessness they felt after losing in a game they couldn’t win anyway – not unlike the frustration and helplessness in the REAL lives that some people live day after day after day….
It’s time to stop blaming video games, guns, fast cars, motorcycles and everything else for dangerous and violent behaviour. The REAL problem isn’t that difficult to figure out, but the infinite human capacity for denial allows us to ignore the obvious. It is Anger, frustration, hatred and lack of respect that pushes us to violent actions, not something as silly as a game, and until we are able to accept the fact that WE are the problem – to acknowledge and cope this sickness of chronic anger that plagues every one of us and our entire society – nothing will change.
SPARKY
January 2nd, 2013
12:24 pm
@Maureen,
They play video games a lot more in Japan than in the US. No violence because they don’t have the violent cowboy culture that the US prides itself on.
mountain man
January 2nd, 2013
12:29 pm
“BUT let’s not blame the individual that carried out this horrible act. ”
Of COURSE we blame the individual, but what good does that do? Will it protect or bring back the 26 dead? We are trying for PREVENTIVE measures.
It does no good to increasse the penalty for murder, because the killer has already executed himself. We have to come up with ways to prevent the crime before it happens. That may involve better metal health evaluations, better parenting, limiting access to guns, limiting acces to violent video games, additional guards or better security at schools.
Iron Ghost
January 2nd, 2013
12:30 pm
Parents have a duty, that duty is to raise their kids to be productive members of society. Any parent with a child or a relative that is as mentally disturbed as the young man that shot up Sandy Hook elementary, should have had those guns and ammunition secured at all times, regardless that he was legally an adult. Parents need to quit covering up their children criminal acts, and dangerous behavior and get these kids some help. In the end, when these disturbed children hurt or kill some one, and as a parent you have done nothing but hide and coverup the problems, then that parent is responsible just the same for what happens.
Dr. Monica Henson
January 2nd, 2013
12:35 pm
“Letting my daughter watch movies like Mississippi Burning, and Schindler’s List, isn’t [horrible parenting].”
I agree, but I sure wouldn’t allow a 5 or 6 year old to watch either of those, and an older elementary schooler I’d want to watch it with me so I could answer questions and put some historical context around the films.
What I’m talking about is the fact that no decent parent would drag a child that age to a theater to see a slasher flick, or hand over the remote control with no monitoring and allow a 5 or 6 year old to watch The Walking Dead or Sons of Anarchy or any number of television programs that may actually be quite good for teenagers and adults (I’m a big fan of the The Walking Dead and watch it with my teenagers and young adult children at home).
Those who think that being an actual parent and having both some awareness AND some control over what their young children view and play with is advocating going back to the 1950s need to calm down and stop falling into the either/or fallacy of thinking.
Dr. Monica Henson
January 2nd, 2013
12:40 pm
“Aren’t you the same person who is all for stealing money from local systems to give to Nathan Deals secret little commission that will decide who offers enough in bribe money to get to build so called “charter schools” where ever Nathan Deal needs to gain political favors and more bribes?”
Fred, why don’t you come Downtown and visit our charter public high school district headquarters? Take a look at the work that is being done, and who is being served? You can email me at monica.henson@ga.provostacademy.com with your availability and I’ll be glad to show you around.
State & federal appropriation of funds to a PUBLIC school is constitutional and not theft, by the way, whether it’s a charter or a district school.
Finally, it’s humorously ironic that someone posting under a pseudonym charges a public entity like the Charter School Commission with being “secret.”
Dr. Monica Henson
January 2nd, 2013
12:43 pm
ImaDAD posted, “Start with being a freakin’ PARENT and not your child’s best friend!!! The word “NO” didn’t kill me and it will not kill my kids either. Just because the game may not be appropriate for your child or their age or even perhaps their mental capacity, doesn’t mean it can’t be ENTERTAINMENT for older, mature, or those with the mental capacity.”
Exactly. Well said.
David
January 2nd, 2013
12:50 pm
I’m genuinely stunned at the number of hostile responses to the suggestion that violent video games might have something to do with these types of shootings.
Here’s what I told my two sons (ages 13 and 11) this week after we saw a Call of Duty commercial: when you can look a combat solider in the eye and tell him that what he does qualifies as entertainment, then I’ll buy the game for them.
And for those of you who think I’m coddling and protecting my sons: you’re exactly correct. Because they’re not adults. They’re children, and with pop culture trying its best to encourage them to grow up faster, I’m going to do my damn best to stand in their way so my boys will grow into young men of character at their own pace.
Susan
January 2nd, 2013
12:51 pm
The young man who committed this crime in Newtown was mentally ill. His mother had tried desperately to get help for him, however, as a society we no longer care for our mentally ill much. They are on their own – or sent to the total care of their families.
Blaming this action on video games is magical thinking: If I can find something that I can control, then I can control my environment to the point that I’ll be safe from harm. That is never true. Random is random.
I will say though, that the one obvious help in this story is that the classrooms that had at least two adults in the room had no fatalities. Staffing up and ensuring there are plenty of adults to corral children in emergencies is a key to surviving a disaster of most any kind. Be prepared – not in denial.
Timmy
January 2nd, 2013
12:51 pm
I agree with the writer; however, Americans usually focus only on the guns. It is time to put the focus on video games and movies that desensitized us to blood, gore and death.
Jan
January 2nd, 2013
1:05 pm
There is no reason to believe that these children suddenly are not the product of parenting (or the lack thereof). Maybe the attempt to create a less violent environment will create less violent parents? Maybe not. Fact is that this country has seen a more than proportional part of graphic violence and many adults still see more weapons as a solution. Sure, there are no simple solutions to complex problems (especially not in a country with so many dogmas) but it seems to me that any attempt to stop the madness is likely to fail in a society where anybody with a temper and not enough restrain can pull a weapon of mass destruction. Violent video games are played all over the world. Capable parents know how to deal with that.
Devil's Advocate
January 2nd, 2013
1:13 pm
Life sure did improve once we got rid of “Cops and Robbers” as well as “Cowboys and Indians”.
lahopital
January 2nd, 2013
1:14 pm
Using a survey to identify “aggressive behavior” is not a very rigorous way to make a measurement. Respondents who play video games may just be more likely characterize their actions as being violent. People in Canada, Japan, the UK and every other first world country play the same violent video games and maintain low murder rates, yet the murder rate in the USA is similar to those in the third world. The USA has been a violent country since its founding. The only things I see as possibly unique about us are that 1) we take insults too seriously (defending one’s “honor” or being “dissed”, 2) we have a very competitive society, 3) we are not as homogeneous as some societies , 4) we don’t institutionalize our mentally ill, and 5) we have easy access to guns – which allows any issue to become deadly in an instant.
cgregister
January 2nd, 2013
1:20 pm
Sorry for the incomplete post. Parents MUST be involved in their childrens’ lives. They MUST monitor their friends and what they purchase and do. Being a parent is a full time job. You are their parent, not their friend and you need to act accordingly. I have seen so many parents who let their kids rule the roost, without any reprimands. If you, as a parent don’ t do your job, don’t blame anyone else for your childs’ shortcomings but yourself. You, the parent,have control of everything, if you do it the correct way. It takes being a stern disciplinarian and continually saying “No”; hearing the words “I hate you”, but in the long run you reap tremendous rewards.
commoncents
January 2nd, 2013
1:31 pm
As many here already pointed out (and I have said in the past), parenting is the problem. Specifically, lack of parenting. Stop trying to be your child’s friend and give them the video games and movies that they shouldn’t be seeing when they are 12 years old.
Games have ratings for a reason, and when I play Call of Duty online (just got the new one for Christmas, it’s fun!) I am amazed that many of the other people sound like they are 12 years old, swearing up a storm, and it’s going on midnight. Growing up, I had a bedtime. I got in trouble for things I shouldn’t have done, and I also got spanked. Now, kids are getting a free pass and the blame card is falling on people/corportations who’s job isn’t to babysit your child.
These are probably some of the same people who brought their 5 year old to see Django: Unchained at the 8 pm showing Christmas day.
C’mon parents… use some common sense
Life Happens
January 2nd, 2013
1:35 pm
It rained yesterday. Who do we blame for that? Man, adults act more like kids than they used to. Always have to lay blame for everything and anything. It’s embarrassing.
No Road Runner didn’t die, but I do remember parents at the time saying it teaches our kids that you can fall off a cliff and live??? Please people wise up. We played Missile Command and not 1 of my friends joined the military or built a missle:)
It’s people. I’m sorry but some are crazy. Some become crazy. I think it boils down to numbers. If I randomly put 10 people off the street in a room the chances I get a murderer is really small. If I put 400 million in a room the chances are 100%. There are more and more people which increases the chance that things like Newtown are going to happen. Oh and a Father being present in the family sure seems to help, but I know, that’s not always convenient. Just the fact that “baby mamma” is a recognized term in our society is also embarrassing!
sean
January 2nd, 2013
1:51 pm
When Ever something horrific happens, we collectively begin to point fingers at things in a vain attempt to make some sort of sense of it. NEWSFLASH- The world is FULL of BAD people. To blame Rambo Movies or Video Games or Super Hero Cartoons is just stupid. I Have two small children and am a Gamer by Hobby (When I have time.). My son is nine and plays CERTAIN games. he’s not allowed to play games that are too violent. And my wife and I do our best to keep him grounded. He plays lego batman and arkham city, I have YET to find a button to a secret cave where he keeps is cape, cowl, and fancy gadgets.
All video game retailers check IDs for violent games (I had to flash Mine in Target the other day, and I’m 38). With that being said, if your child unwrapped “Call of Duty” 8 days ago, YOU HAVE NO RIGHT TO BLAME VIDEO GAMES! Let’s start calling a spade what it is: With ALL the parental controls on everything from ipads to cable boxes and game consoles, all of this begins at home. My son doesn’t play Grand Theft Auto, or any other game I determine to be out of his age bracket. I don’t allow him to go places where other people allow thier children to do so. When he grows up and understands a little more, I will, as a parent, re-visit the issue then. For now, all he does, watches, and plays is monitored. To blame the things around you because you are out of touch is WRONG!
Holding a controler and playing a racing game does not make you a NASCAR driver. Holding a controller and playing “Call of Duty” does not make you a Marine Corps. Sniper. If YOU are going to allow your Children to play these games, First, teach them the difference between what the see on xbox, and how to interact with people/ resolve conflicts in life. If you, AS A PARENT, think they cannot handle the difference and don’t kid yourself, Do not buy the game. Buying power has shifted to you. Be a parent….
Dan
January 2nd, 2013
1:58 pm
If the “video games influence behaviors” thought really held any merit, we’d be overrun with mind blowing dancers, world class race car drivers, and large multi-engine aircraft pilots – all aged 12 and below.
The truth is that YES, guns are far too easily obtained, but no amount of legislation is going to eliminate the mental problems that cause an individual to go on a killing spree. You can’t simply say “video games cause violence” and “guns are too common” without addressing the MASSIVE shortcomings of caring for the mentally ill.
Devil's Advocate
January 2nd, 2013
2:35 pm
It just seems like yesterday when Rambo, Terminator, and any martial arts movie was the reason for violent crime. Add to that rock and roll and gangsta rap. Sure is funny how people cannot control themselves and are so easily influenced to do bad by others. Why aren’t people easily manipulated to do good things?
Ed Johnson
January 2nd, 2013
2:41 pm
“They raise their hands when they don’t know the answer. … They understand the needs of those around them, they play with all their classmates, and they respect their parents, their teachers, and their god.”
Ah, fearless learning, trust, and cooperation! But why is it that, after a while, we get to saying:
“As parents, we need to do our best to stop our children from the desensitizing impact of video games.”
Might the desensitizing impact stem from something our culture inculcates far more deeply than video games possibly can? Something of which video games is but one expression? Something that school shootings of even six year olds is yet another expression?
http://www.artofteachingscience.org/2012/12/15/letter-president-obama-affect-educational-systems-encourage-win-lose-behavior/
http://www.artofteachingscience.org/2012/12/17/u-s-department-education-simply-out-of-touch/
Dc Wilson
January 2nd, 2013
2:47 pm
Just out of curiosity, does anyone have any statistics on the number of children killed annually by a video game-wielding madman?
Retired teacher
January 2nd, 2013
2:48 pm
I watched “Road Runner” as a child in the early 70s. The difference between that cartoony violence and the violence that children are exposed to these days is simple:
I only had 3 channels to pick from in the early 70s. When “Looney Tunes” went off, there wasn’t much else to pick from and I went outside to play. Of course I threw rocks at my sister, but she also threw them back. I quit once I got hit in the head a few times.
These days, kids have dozens of channels to pick from. They also have tvs in their rooms whereas we had one tv for our entire family. And there are also DVDs in cars so that parents don’t have to spend time actually talking to their kids.
Parents need to just put their foot down. Unplug the darned things, and spend time with their kids.
sloboffthestreet
January 2nd, 2013
2:53 pm
We have a call of duty as parents? This is true but here we have another kind of crazy when people claim playing a game causes people to become murderers.
Perhaps the mother had a call of duty to be a responsible gun owner and keep her weapons secure at all times. Knowing her child was different from the other kids, a hobby other than target shooting would have been more appropriate for her son. Perhaps we can blame the shootings on the fact that they came from New Hampshire where the state motto is “Live Free or Die.” I read one report where the mother was going to institutionalize her son. If she was as free with her plans as she was with her weapons, just maybe the young man snapped over the fear of being completely removed from the one person he could count on to care for him feeling completely abandoned. As he pushed his father and brother away after their parents divorce and his fathers new marriage there appears to have been a huge dynamic that existed between the mother and son. It is possible this was created by the mother and her own words. We don’t pay enough attention to mental illness in this country until it leads to tragedy. We don’t see gun ownership as the tremendous responsibility it is until it is to late. So many claim they need weapons to defend themselves when all to often they only bring the ultimate pain to those that surround them and others that have nothing to do with the situation.
There may be several reasons for this situation but to blame it on a video game as a simple solution is far fetched and very irresponsible to write or publish. The media did a terrible job tripping over each other to be the first to report any of the news, factual or not, related to the shootings. A little more thought before writing, printing or reporting anything relating to such a situation would be proper.
Joel
January 2nd, 2013
3:10 pm
We will continue to suffer these tragedies as long as we confuse cause and effect. People play violent video games, own guns and use government violence for social change as a result of human nature. Help people control their emotions and you will help decrease unnecessary violence.
Another Math Teacher
January 2nd, 2013
4:39 pm
Monica Henson: “Tom & Jerry, the Road Runner, and Marvin the Martian are nothing like the violent, adult-rated video games (and television shows)”
Flew right over your head, didn’t it? Every few years the boogeyman changes.
Emulating cartoon violence. Non-terminal violence causing severe injuries/death. (Kids do not understand that people die from these things, so they do them.)
Emulating violent video games. Terminal violence. (Kids do understand that people die from these things, so they do them.)
Emulating violent pencil and paper games. Terminal violence.
Music, several times. Back masking, subliminal messages. Terminal violence to self and others.
(Blame Target) is responsible for (societal problem related to children.) Children copy these actions because they (do/do not) understand that the actions cause real world consequences.
It’s the same thing over and over. Stupid people blaming something they don’t understand rather than watching their kids. It’s just bad parents trying to justify their “it’s not my fault” stance.
As for video games, have I missed the articles where the killer yells “PWNED!” while tea-bagging a corpse? Did the killer say “PEW! PEW! PEW!” while firing off rounds? Did he have Cheeto dust on his hands? Was he all hopped up on Mountain Dew? Are we sure he intentionally killed himself? Maybe it was a mistimed rail gun jump.
USC-69
January 2nd, 2013
4:39 pm
I agree with the Headmaster that teaching children to shoot other people in the head and enjoy the splatter is not a good idea. The large number of people in this blog that think that it is points out a major societal problem. More importantly, we should note that the mother of the New Town shooter legally purchased hand-guns and a semi-automatic rifle designed to resemble the same guns used in many of these videos. She took the son to the rifle range and taught him to shoot. These guns were accessible to a young man with a life-long history of a personality disorder so severe that it was recognized by everyone who had come in contact with him. The mother and son were not members of a ‘well-regulated militia’ nor was their possession of these fire-arms ‘necessary to the security of a free state’. The destructive nature of video games teaching children to murder is obvious. Giving children guns requires law enforcement to find their parents as accessories. Enforcement of Article II of the Bill of Rights should have begun long ago and the repeated misstatement of it to allow unregulated civilians access to lethal weapons must be discontinued.
Ole Guy
January 2nd, 2013
4:50 pm
Recaping an earlier blog on parental responsibilities, in general, and specificaly, the poor judgement the dead mother of this apparently unstable kid exhibited…one certainly does not wish to trample upon the grave of this mom. However, it cannot be diputed that, given her son’s (presumably known) mental disposition, this parent was way way out of line in the responsibility department. Had she survived, there is little doubt that she, and she alone, would have suffered the legal wrath of the parents of these dead kids.
Given that we no longer (if, indded, we ever really did) live in the innocence of the so-called “Beaver Days”, we witness, day in and day out, such reprehensible behavior of youth…SOMEONE must be held accountable. Given the public outcry, in my more-past comments on the revitalization of “the stick” over the “kind word”, just exactly what are YOU to do with these kids, and their parents, who somehow don’t seem to get the message…WITH RIGHTS COME RESPONSIBILITIES. Just as we are quick to demand our rights, let us not overlook a demand for accountability.
bootney farnsworth
January 2nd, 2013
5:09 pm
just what teh situtation needs. another touchy feely response instead of taking a hard look at reality
Beverly Fraud
January 2nd, 2013
5:19 pm
Finally @Dr. Henson and for profit charters. You do realize when Office Depot, Microsoft, mop makers, tool makers, lawnmower manufacturers and the like sell to the traditional public schools, all of them sell at cost don’t you, and categorically refuse to make any profit off the transactions right?
Response from Dr. Henson
Absolutely not true.
Dr. Henson, you were aware that I was totally, completely weren’t you?
bu2
January 2nd, 2013
5:40 pm
@retired teacher
I think you may have hit upon the point. It may be an excess of relatively passive viewing that’s a problem. All boys had guns in the 60s and played Cowboys and Indians and soldier. And everyone watched the Roadrunner.
Of course, after watching the Roadrunner for a while, I really wanted the Coyote to blow that smartaleck bird to bits.
bu2
January 2nd, 2013
5:43 pm
I don’t think video games are “the” reason for the problems, but as much as we keep learning about how the brain works and develops, parents should use discretion, especially with pre-adolescents, and there should be more study.
I love teaching. I hate what it is becoming...
January 2nd, 2013
6:13 pm
I do not know whether “video games” cause violence but I do believe they have a very real effect on how the mind perceives reality – especially in heavy doses. I speak from personal experience. I have never been into gaming. I am of the generation prior to video games. Pac Man and Pong were cutting edge in my day. However, a few years ago, I received a computer game as a gift. I began to play it for fun. For about three weeks, I spent an hour to three hours an evening working my way through the levels of the game. Part of the action involved having to solve a series of difficult puzzles or logic problems while fighting off the bad guys. I rather enjoyed that portion – aside from the endless supplies of evil minions. Part of the game involved basic first person shooter action. I disliked that part, and died many, many times before I could make it to the next level.
Now, to the point of this story. After a few weeks of playing this game, I noticed a change in how I was “thinking” about things. I began having the perception that I could “redo” certain events in my life if I needed to change something – much like I could reset the game when I had been killed off by the evil lackeys. The more I played the game, the more this type of ‘magical thinking” began to creep into my perceptions. One day, I had walked down to the copy room, but found I had forgotten to bring all of the papers I needed to copy. I literally thought to myself, “That’s okay. I’ll just reset myself back in the room and bring them this time.” It wasn’t, “I can walk back to the room and get them” – for a moment, I honestly thought I could just re-set my life, start back in my room, and pick up all the correct papers this time. It stopped me short. Later in the day, I spilled my mug of tea, and again, had the same kind of flash of momentary “magical thinking” about resetting life so I didn’t spill the tea. That was when it really hit me how much playing the game had affected my thinking. I stopped playing it after that. The effects on my mind were just too troublesome.
At the time this occurred, I was a fully grown adult who had lived in the “real world” for several decades. I had only been playing this one video game for a few weeks. I began to wonder what such types of games my do to the minds of children who play them hour after hour, day after day. What might violent first shooter games do to a child’s perception of reality? Could a child who has spent a childhood playing such games gun down a bunch of classmates and honestly think they could just have a do-over if they didn’t like the outcome? I don’t honestly know, but I think it is important to consider the problem. We do get desensitized to violence and incivility over time. I have noted it in myself. That does not mean I have any intention of deliberately harming anyone, but I was raised with a firm, stable foundation of morals, values and compassion for others. What about someone who is raised in a home without emotional support? What about someone who is already mentally unstable? What about a child who has a warped perception of reality due to hours spent playing games where “reality” is malleable? Are we not possibly doing them harm by allowing them to immerse themselves in a world that offers up death and destruction as entertainment? I think it is a question worth asking and seriously considering.
redweather
January 2nd, 2013
6:43 pm
We glorify gun violence in our society–always have–but it is now more pervasive (tv, movies, video games) than it’s ever been. Children are impressionable, meaning they are easily influenced for good and for ill. Every parent knows this, and that’s why responsible parents seek to maximize the positive influences in their chidren’s lives and minimize the negative ones.
Video games that equate killing people with entertainment can’t possibly have a positive influence on children. Might there ultimately be negative effects associated with these kinds of games? It would not surprise me if research eventually showed that there were.
There are negative effects associated with all kinds of behavior. That’s why parents don’t hire pimps and prostitutes as babysitters. That’s why they don’t encourage their children to smoke cigarettes, drink alcohol, have unprotected sex, commit crimes, etc.
And it isn’t just children who are impressionable. When I was growing up in the fifties and sixties, most of the adults in my life smoked cigarettes. And when I was a teen, most of my friends and I smoked. That ain’t the way it is any more. Why? Because we succeeded in changing the way people think about cigarettes by enlightening them to the dangers associated with smoking, and the media played a very important role in this.
If responsible parents can see the wisdom of bringing positive influences to bear in the lives of their children, they should also be able to see the danger of allowing negative influences to have a place in their children’s lives.
Lee
January 2nd, 2013
7:19 pm
As a youngster, we built forts and lobbed dirtclod “grenades” at each other, we played cowboys and indians, we played cops and robbers, we all had BB guns as and shot tens of thousands of bb’s through them, we carried pocketknifes (even to school), most of us received a real gun (usually a single shot .22) by age 10-12, deer season saw about half the pickups in the high school parking lot with an old 30-30 or shotgun in the gun rack in the rear window. As kids and teens, we probably had more access to guns than do the youth of today.
But we would never dream of shooting up a school full of 6 year olds.
Of course, we also had mothers who stayed at home and fathers who would light our butts on fire with a belt if needed. Sunday morning saw us scrubbed clean and sitting in church. Just about all of our neighbors were related to us somehow.
Back then, I didn’t know any student who was taking behavior meds. ADD/ADHD? Never heard of it. Hyper? Get out in the yard and play and don’t drink too many Cokes was the cure. Burn that excess energy off.
We didn’t have video games, but I saw Marshal Dillon shoot at least one bad guy per week. Heck, even Roy Rogers would plug a bad guy every now and then.
Bottom line? If you have a strong moral compass and a grip on reality, then video games and violent movies are not going to affect you. If you don’t, and you are popping meds as if they were Tic Tacs, then perhaps so.
Of course, I do have to fight the urge to put a couple of rounds through the stereo of those cars that are thumping a bass at 300 decibels…
mountain man
January 2nd, 2013
7:47 pm
“The media did a terrible job tripping over each other to be the first to report any of the news, factual or not, related to the shootings. ”
Because there were no FACTS being given out! Just as I predicted, the media has moved on and we are left with a bunch of unanswered questions that the Newtown officials know the answer to but they won’t release them until the story grows cold, and then a little at a time and on the newspaper back page. They do that on purpose. Did the mom own a gun safe? Was it forced open? Did the mother try to have her son institutionalized? Did he have a credit card? Did his mom supply it? Did he order high-capacity clips and ammo over the internet? How did he pay for it? Where did he get the bulletproof vest? How did he pay for it? Inquiring minds want to know the FACTS, and no one will give them to us, so we cling to press releases from the National Inquirer. They are the ONLY ones reporting!
KB
January 2nd, 2013
8:03 pm
Isn’t there a major difference between watching someone be shot on a movie or a t.v. show and supposedly being the person doing the shooting on a video game? Video games pride themselves on making the experience as ‘real’ as possible.
What could possibly be even more ‘real’ for the gamer? Oh yes, the real thing.
SarahLynn
January 2nd, 2013
8:49 pm
I liked this essay and found his description of 6 year olds to be heartbreakingly accurate, in the context of Sandy Hook. I just wish there was more research into effects of video games. I think they sound horrible and then I read some piece citing something saying that they help,channel aggressions. I just wish there was more research. Instinct tells me the games are wrong but my instinct could be wrong. It has been before.
janet
January 2nd, 2013
10:03 pm
The comparison of Tom and Jerry and Roadrunner cartoons to the types of extremely violent video games that are out now is just plain ignorance!! Todays games show reaisitic looking humans, and realistic looking blood, and realistic sounding gunfire, and realistic dead bodies. They are NOT the same thing and the effects they have on young minds are not the same either. I don’t understand how anyone could make that arguement. (For the record, I’m not anti-gaming. My husband works in IT and is a pretty big gamer himself.)
The author’s comment that struck a big cord with me was that 6 year olds can’t even open their own carton of milk. Think about that… they can’t even open their own carton of milk…. and yet they are spending hours upon hours “killing other human beings” in the most realistic way that today’s technology can provide.
It’s true the “research” may not be there yet, but it seems like COMMON SENSE that allowing young minds to view and perpetrate these video “murders” will desensitize them. Hell, in Grand Theft Auto, you actaully get MORE points for killing the prostitute once you’re done with her. I feel like it’s 1970 and everyone is saying “Hey, there’s no actual PROOF that cigarettes can kill you”. My dad did it, my grandad did it, we’ll be fine… cough, hack, cough cough”. We
My 7 year old is begging to see The Hobbit which is rated PG-13. I will not allow it because of the level of violence…. and that fact that she is nowhere close to 13. Instead, today we went to see Rise of the Guardians (a rated PG Holiday movie). As we were leaving the theater, The Hobbit was exiting at the same time and, much to my suprise or I should say disappointment, there were A TON of 4-8 year olds in that theater. But when you allow your kid to play Halo, or Call of Duty, or Grand Theft Auto…. well, somehow a PG-13 movie doesn’t seem so inappropriate or violent. There IS such a thing as AGE APPROPRIATE. It’s funny, but it’s always the parents who allow all of this mature overexposure, whether it be to violence or hyper sexualized images, who are the ones saying… “These darn kids just grow up way too fast these days”. It’s infuriating.
Do I think that video games CAUSE kids to grow up and be sociopaths…No. Do I think that violent video games play an integral role…. ABSOLUTELY.
Fred ™
January 3rd, 2013
7:42 am
Dr. Monica Henson
January 2nd, 2013
12:40 pm
“Aren’t you the same person who is all for stealing money from local systems to give to Nathan Deals secret little commission that will decide who offers enough in bribe money to get to build so called “charter schools” where ever Nathan Deal needs to gain political favors and more bribes?”
Fred, why don’t you come Downtown and visit our charter public high school district headquarters? Take a look at the work that is being done, and who is being served? You can email me at monica.henson@ga.provostacademy.com with your availability and I’ll be glad to show you around.
State & federal appropriation of funds to a PUBLIC school is constitutional and not theft, by the way, whether it’s a charter or a district school.
Finally, it’s humorously ironic that someone posting under a pseudonym charges a public entity like the Charter School Commission with being “secret.”
+++++++++++++++++++++++++++
Georgia ALREADY HAD a mechanism for charter schools. What we didn’t need was for Nathan, who resigned his Congressional seat so he couldn’t be brought up on ethic s charges, to create his little secret commission.
Now YOU may think that a message board screen name and a tax payer funded commission are the same thing but they aren’t. Your snide little digs are meaningless to me and really show how shallow and ignorant you are. One would have hoped that someone such as yourself who not only benefited form a higher education but also advanced degrees would have a capacity for reasoning skills above this level. Apparently not.. You know you are helping to perpetrate a fraud and apparently are proud of it. Unfortunately you get paid for it and I don’t. Things I post here could negatively affect my WIFE’S job. Maureen knows who I am. She won’t tell you I trust because it’s none of your damn business and that journalistic sources thing I think.
But your taunts are juvenile. I PAY for my daughters private school. 20 grand a year roughly (Woodward academy, you do can google). All this new ‘amendment” does is provide “private school” for whoever the crook Nathan Deal wants to provide a private, I mean ”charter” school for, AT TAXPAYER EXPENSE. I was abut to take you up on your offer before you made your snide comment. I can’t afford to jeopardize my wife’s career on someone with an agenda and political clout to “punish” anyone who doesn’t toe the line. Your Southern Baptist “line” isn’t one I choose.
You have Nathan’s ear and OUR checkbook so you have cart blanche to continue to wreck Georgia’s already piss poor public education system. Enjoy the havoc you wreak. There isn’t much lower you can take the public schools. Thankfully I can avoid that for my child, but I weep for the other children who’s parents can’t. Enjoy your Judas gold.
long time educator
January 3rd, 2013
7:53 am
All people are affected by what we put in our minds regardless of age. As adults we choose for ourselves, but children need parental supervision. Ultimately this is a spiritual problem in our society; when individuals lack meaning they look for things to fill the void. Drugs, mindless entertainment of all types, excesses in satisfying physical hungers; these are not new, they were earlier seen as manifestations of THE SEVEN DEADLY SINS, sloth, lust, gluttony, wrath, envy, greed, and pride. Sin leads to deadening all of our sensitivity to evil. Laugh at the old way of thinking, but most of these posts are about the lack of values in our spiritually bereft society.
What's Best for Kids?
January 3rd, 2013
9:48 am
How many parents were involved completely in our lives as kids? My parents told us to go out and play and not to come back until lunch/dinner/bedtime. Not superinvolved, I would say.
We made our little people rules, we had our own caste system, and not one of us ended up in jail. My dad used to say that was pretty good odds for zeor out of five to be productive members of society.
We did things as a family, but we were also left to our own devices a lot.
I don’t think that parents are more involved than they were in the seventies or eighties.
I also can’t blame guns; we did not have them in the house, but most of our neighbors did. No one ended up on a killing spree.
I’m struggling with blaming video games, too. I think they are silly, but my husband had an Xbox for years until the first born came along; then the whole parenting thing got in the way of personal enjoyment.
I believe that this was a disturbed young man who committed a horrible act.
Warrior Woman
January 3rd, 2013
10:23 am
Why is my comment still awaiting moderation a day later? For that matter, why was my comment held for moderation at all?
Pride and Joy
January 3rd, 2013
11:07 am
Fred is an advocate of giving kids violent video games because he says he has to prepare his kids for teh real, violent world out there.
But Fred…violent video games don’t prepare the kids. When they get killed online, they get a new life, unlike the real world.
If you want to prepare the kids for the real world, how about driving under a bridge and showing them the homeless people and then taking him to a shelter and asking him to help serve those people and then emphasize homework and education so they don’t end up homeless? That’s what I did. My little children fed the homeless in person, food they helped to prepare that I purchased.
If you want to show your kids how to deal with real life, show them the horrors of what a meth-addict looks like — with scabs on his face and rotten teeth and then talk about drug addiction?
If you think showing the kids the real world will help them deal with it — then really Do show them the horrors of bad choices.
But violent video games have no good value except to make the creators rich. They sucker us out of our money.
I prefer not to be a sucker.
I spend my money on taking my children to places they can appreciate such as space camp, circus camp, gymnastics and the swim team. They get to spend time with kids their own age, socialize, learn and get and stay fit.
A game of cards with mom and dad is also a wonderful past time to teach numbers, strategy and good sportsmanship and manners. It’s also extremely cheap as other other board games which require social interaction, attention to manners (politely taking turns) and strategy. board games also show kids that parents give a rip enough about them to tear themselves away from the TV to spend some quality time with their children. Books work like that too.
There are a lot more healthy choices to teach kids about the real world than throwing an overpriced video game at them.
Pride and Joy
January 3rd, 2013
11:08 am
This author is wonderful. Thanks for sharing. I appreciate his profound statement that getting a sudafed for a cold is more difficult than buying a gun.
Pride and Joy
January 3rd, 2013
11:22 am
Dr. Monica henson is spot on when she says that public schools do not buy products “at cost.”
My friend’s son sells text books and educational materials to PUBLIC schools and he is RICH and…32 years old.
He’s also handsome and smart and he is charming and he makes a butt load off of the public schools. I’ve worked all my life and I never made half his income even in my best years.
He literally makes a fortune selling text books to public schools…at a discount.
RxDawg
January 3rd, 2013
4:05 pm
All the laws and removal of freedoms in the world won’t stop evil. Not the unrelenting kind of evil that shoots children in schools. People think they can “fix” stuff like this from happening. What I think is evil like this sees schools having a bunch of unarmed easy targets for slaughtering. The national reactions to these kinds of horrors almost disgust me as much as the act itself.
Cobb Parent
January 3rd, 2013
4:51 pm
Dr.Henson – Provost Academy is owned and operated by Edison Learning a for profit corporation. A Wall Street investment firm owns a majority stake in Edison. Edison’s CEO is a former exec at GE Capital. Edison has been around in various forms over the years yet is still not profitable. I believe it started in Great Britain and has proved over the years not be the magic potion to cure public schools. It’s looks like most Edison schools are not accredited similar to the for profit tech schools like ITT Tech.
Edison is also a huge player with ALEC whose sole mission is to destroy public governments like schools and to push ‘For Profit Charter Schools’ so that Wall Street can claim billions of taxpayer education dollars.
As long as our state general assembly – Chipper Rogers , Jan Jones etc – continues to defund public schools and fund (2x the dollars) Charter Schools I will continue to be skeptical of the for profit charter movement no matter how they are marketed.
lahopital
January 3rd, 2013
6:19 pm
Nobody has yet to explain how, since the Japanese (or, pick your country) play these same games, their murder rates are a tiny fraction of ours. It would make more sense to blame American football or the fact that the US has more churches than other countries. At least those are things that are different about this country.
Atlanta Mom
January 3rd, 2013
6:34 pm
For all you folks wondering why Japan doesn’t have a gun problem
“In part by forbidding almost all forms of firearm ownership, Japan has as few as two gun-related homicides a year.” http://www.theatlantic.com/international/archive/2012/07/a-land-without-guns-how-japan-has-virtually-eliminated-shooting-deaths/260189/
DUH
Ed Johnson
January 3rd, 2013
7:49 pm
@Cobb Parent, Chip Rogers has quit the legislature and gone to work for Georgia Public Broadcasting (GPB), seemingly the result of a Deal deal.
http://blogs.ajc.com/jay-bookman-blog/2012/12/05/lets-be-honest-chip-rogers-is-being-paid-to-go-away/