A teacher explains why she gave up a career she loved
Teacher Jordan Kohanim left her school and her room with a white board that was a focal point for her students.
Jordan Kohanim is a former Fulton County high school teacher and one of my favorite posters on the blog because of her eloquence, her candor and her willingness to put her name behind her comments.
She quit teaching. Here, she tells us why:
By Jordan Kohanim
I have decided to quit teaching. Maybe not forever, but definitely for a year or two. This is not a decision I came to lightly, and I did not feel triumphant in it at all. To be frank, I had never felt more defeated in my life.
It’s true that I am statistic. More than 50 percent of teachers leave teaching in the first seven years. Most of those are in the first five years. This was year seven for me.
I told a colleague that I planned on leaving the profession and he told me something that really hurt at first. He said, “Your leaving won’t change anything.” Emphasis on the anything. It felt like an arrow through my heart.
In the long run, he’s right, though. That is part of the reason I am quitting. I know —ego drives us all — but I really thought I made a difference. And I did — for about a dozen or so kids, but there is no way I can make difference enough for long enough, all while keeping my sanity.
I have lost my faith in public education. That means it is time to walk away.
It started last year when I was chair of the student support team, which addresses the needs of struggling students. I watched the neediest of students get declined services, while the most deceptive of parents used their lawyers to manipulate the system into giving their children unfair advantage. I saw so many students and teachers hurt in this process, so many adults whose sole concern was not education or the well-being of children, so many lawyers and politicians who cared nothing about learning, that I broke.
I broke. No one can fix education when everyone just wants to sue. No one can fix a system where every success is countered with a failure. Where blame-shifting is status-quo. Where the responsibility for success and failure relies on everyone but the child. I became disgusted. I stopped doing the student support team and went back to just teaching full time.
I thought this last school year I would regain my love for teaching. Maybe it was too late.
My classes were too big. If I work six-hour days with no breaks, it takes 28 days to grade essays for my 159 students. That is for one semester. I am an English teacher. My kids must write. I must grade it. I actually enjoy grading, but 159 is too much, 28 days is too much.
Merit pay is coming, whether I like it or not. It is already in effect in other places. My dad says they have been threatening it for years and it hasn’t happened. Well, now it is tied to federal dollars for Georgia. So, like it or not — our kids are data points. They are numbers on someone’s spreadsheet.
Their purpose in school is not learning — it is education. And there is a difference between learning and education. I didn’t realize it before. I guess that makes me very naive.
When I coached debate my kids learned. They learned about rhetoric, philosophy, policy, government, language and discipline. I spent so many hours making sure they truly understood just how powerful those concepts are. Even that, though, was so much time. I did it alone. I neglected my family, myself.
That’s what this boils down to. My family comes first. I have given so much to other peoples’ families. I have fought so hard to always do the right thing — and to be honest, I’m tired. I can’t do this job half-way. I just can’t. It’s too important. It means too much.
My husband stood up to his boss and moved to a better company. I guess I am doing the same thing. Funny, I don’t feel as victorious. I just feel sad and a little angry, but not satisfied.
This isn’t a decision I am proud of. I will ultimately be happier for leaving teaching. I will make more money, I will have more time and I will no longer neglect myself for the sake of others’ children. I would like to go back some day when the system finally figures out how lucky it is that people are willing to teach.
Maybe I could have found a different school. Maybe I should have gone to private school. Maybe I should just move on and not look back. That will be difficult, though.
On the bright side, I have a new job. It’s actually a lot like teaching — I just educate my clients on their health and Medicare supplement insurance options. I still get to serve a group of people. They are just a different group of people. That being said, I cannot ignore that I am leaving a profession I love dearly. Everyone in my family has been part of public education. I viewed it as a calling. I guess now the call has changed its tune.
–From Maureen Downey, for the AJC Get Schooled blog
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320 comments Add your comment
Mary Elizabeth
June 27th, 2012
9:12 am
For those teachers who still may be reading this thread, I want to encourage you to remain in public education and become active politically to help sustain and improve public education, by safeguarding it from forces without which desire to dismantle public education, as well as by improving it from within.
Every teacher has to make his or her own personal decision regarding whether or not to remain in teaching, or even in public education, and I do respect that individual choice, such as the choice made – and so eloquently expressed – by Jordan Kohanim in her article, above. However, I believe that, if the majority of teachers will choose to remain in public education, they have the opportunity to be happier in the long run because, together, they could secure for themselves, and for other teachers, more job satisfaction and a more fulfilling working environment if they would join their professional organizations, such as GAE, NEA, and their local branch which is affiliated with GAE and NEA, and become politically and professionally active teachers.
When great stress is thrust upon one, it is a known psychological fact that the one under that duress will either fight or flee. I urge teachers to stay in public education and fight for its continuing viability, and for its continuing improvement, for the following reasons:
(1) If public schools are, in large part, dismantled for private schools, or for public charter schools which are run by private corporations, children will ultimately be used for profit purposes and teachers will be controlled as commodities to ensure that that profit continues to exist. That means that teachers will have reduced salaries and benefits such as retirement security and health insurance benefits because teachers’ welfare will not be a primary goal of that educational industry, profit will be its overriding goal. (I realize that there are also non-profit schools.)
(2) There is value in being a public servant instead of being simply a small part of a much larger corporate conglomerate in which the primary focus is on profit. Some elements of government service jobs must remain viable in order to emphasize to the nation the value of public service, which is not for profit, especially since a dominant political movement has been forged against the value of the public servant, for decades.
Please consider staying in public education, joining GAE and NEA in Georgia, and becoming politically active in support of public education, along with other teachers. There is power in numbers. Who knows what might be the end result of that combined effort? A teachers’ union may even, finally, be established in Georgia which would secure teachers’ professional rights and status, and in so doing, help to improve public school environments for students throughout Georgia. Nothing transformational occurs without, first, having a dream or vision for that future change, and also without exercising the will to make that dream become a reality. Would not it be a wonderful legacy for teachers in Georgia to have been the initial force through which all Georgians were able to break free of a long-standing societal paternalism which has curtailed any unions from existing for the average worker in this right-to-work state through a political power system which has been based on that paternalism?
Ashley
June 27th, 2012
12:25 pm
Is this really what teaching is like? I found this article very sad.
The statistic of 50% of teachers leaving in the first 7 years is scary. Something should be done about this.
“I watched the neediest of students get declined services, while the most deceptive of parents used their lawyers to manipulate the system into giving their children unfair advantage.”
-This is horrible and should not be happening in the school systems. NO matter what the income is of your students, they should ALL be given the same advantages and services.
Anonymous for now
June 27th, 2012
6:18 pm
Wow. My feelings exactly. I changed professions several years ago to become a teacher, and it’s been one heartbreak after another. My last job was a total joke. Inner city, therapeutic day school. Graduating seniors who read at a 9th-grade level. Passing EVERYBODY regardless of grades or effort. One 9th-gradrer reads at a PRE-PRIMARY level, and passed all of his classes, including Geometry, where he did NOTHING. Teachers under pressure to never fail a student, because “it reflects badly on you as a teacher, and I can have a hundred resumes in my computer in an hour.” I’m looking for a new job, but in my old profession as well. I hope I get as lucky as Jordan did.
Anonmom
June 27th, 2012
9:58 pm
My thought about vouchers (even if just restricted to public school) is that it breaks the billions of dollars into ten thousand dollar increments and infuses it into the bottom layer of the system and into the hands of hundreds of thousands of “players” — in the current system, the billions of dollars feed downwards and they never make it that far — they stay at the top and get skimmed off into programs and “friends and family” — if you feed the dollars in at the bottom layer in tiny parts and let them work up, it will be harder (not impossible) to skim them off — the money is more likely to see its way to teachers and students. Secondly, it would force parents to become active participants in actively choosing where to spend the voucher and if they don’t like how the school is using the money that the voucher is attached to, the parent has the ability to take that voucher the next year and move its somewhere else — the schools with no students would be forced to close so there is an incentive to provide “service” and an incentive (requirment) to participate. I see the system as completely broken and corrupt — like a small third world country, taking as much money as possible for the adults in charge in some fashion or another and I see vouchers as a way to get the money that we are already spending into as many hands as possible to feed in at the classroom level for the actual benefit of the chilren in order to have it feed upwards into administration instead of downwards into the classroom (which it isn’t seeing at the moment). My idea may not work but truthfully it really can’t be much worse than what is currently taking place… Georgia has been in the bottom 5 nationally for over a century and we are poised to do worse. And taxpayers are really spending billions of dollars a year to get here. The rub is that the kids who aren’t getting their educations, who aren’t receiving “life skills” to gain useful employment, are landing on welfare, on the streets and are furture criminals who are not going to make for a society we want to live in down the road. This is nonsensical on so many different levels. We need a new paradigm.
Rebecca
June 27th, 2012
10:21 pm
This is sad. Sad for society but not for you. It sounds like you served your time. My problem was that I was teaching in Hell with no support. Gangs, fighting… I even had a student that walked out the door one Friday afternoon and shot a classmate. And guess what? The superintendent of the District made us feel that it was the school’s fault. Not the communities ’s or societies. Charleston County, SC. I took an early retirement. There are other things to do. I see great writing skills here. Think about freelance. That’s what I am doing. I love it!
Anonmom
June 28th, 2012
8:19 am
another thing, cynically, I’m reminded of, is the expression “you can lead a horse to water but you can’t make him drink” — and setting aside our “policy debate” and the history of public ed in our country (and yes, I am all in favor of an educated public because I am not interested in a repeat of WWII or Stalinist Russia) — I wonder if forcing the issue and taking the government out of education all together is, really, a better answer to actually get all of our children educated. I actually think that most Americans really do want the kids educated and I think that, given the level of spending on education at all levels (federal, state and local) — if all those resources were to be restored into “original hands” and education were to become something to be “fought for” rather than just “there for the taking” and parents had to get kids kids placed into schools and schools could boot kids out; I wonder if the entire dynamic would change and if would would get a much better product all the way around and if the end result would be many, many more kids actually learning from their teachers in the classroom and fewer of these “games” with the trillions of dollars that are being spent trying to make kids learn as we play “let’s educate.”
Cobb History Teacher
June 28th, 2012
8:31 am
@Mountainman
I agree some schools have a policy of giving no lower than a 60. I understand the logic behind this as it keeps students from giving up because their grade could never be brought up, but I’d like to find a job where you can do nothing and still get 60% of your pay and benefits.
Jane
June 28th, 2012
1:41 pm
Amen, and brava to you for having the courage to tell it as it genuinely is. Our schools are no longer places where children who wish to learn are given a good education; they have become storehouses for children whose parents don’t want to raise them. Schools can’t teach any more; they have to feed, clothe, babysit, medicate, placate, and prove to the government that the students are at least exposed to standards made up by old white men whose memories of “trouble in school” consist of gum and untucked shirts. Entitled, elitist families sue at the drop of a hat for anything and everything. Curriculum is so dumbed down, it’s become a joke. Our best and brightest kids sit and wait. And wait. And wait, until Billy in the back finally “gets it.” Or, worse, our G/T kids spend their school day out in the hall, tutoring, instead of being encouraged and enriched and allowed to spread their wings and soar. Soaring is politically incorrect, as it makes the slower kids feel bad. I’ve had middle school classes of 46 students. 7 academic classes daily. 23 minutes for lunch. No break, because subs cost too much and we had to fill in. If teachers didn’t love kids and teaching and seeing learning bloom, we’d ALL walk away. What other professional would put up with these conditions? I walked out after 26 years, from a school and kids I adored, because the peripherals were just too awful. Now I teach developmental courses at a community college, where many of my students consist of kids who got short shrift in the public school and need some serious remediation before they can tackle actual college courses. My students are not slow; they were never taught and allowed to actually learn the basics because all their teachers had time to do was review for and give standardized tests, which measure nothing but how well a person can take a standardized test. But now I’d best stop before I write a novel here.
P.S. Nobody who knows anything at all about children, education, and learning would disagree with this post. It’s spot-on. I guess you had to BE THERE to understand.
Mary Elizabeth
June 28th, 2012
4:23 pm
I’ve been there for 35 years and I understand. That is why all students must be taught on their functioning instructional levels, whatever their grade level, whether they are in third grade or in a community college, functioning below freshman level in college.
Don’t “flee” from public education, teachers. I urge you to stay and “fight” for the viability of public schools and for the success of all students within them through programs which implement strong instructional programs, as highlighted in my first paragraph. Join GAE, NEA, as well as your local affiliate, and become politically active. Make positive change happen. Don’t become defeatist. Stay and keep faith that you CAN make a difference. Join with other teachers for moral and pragmatic support. I kept faith and made positive change happen, and I was sent a personal letter of appreciation from my system’s Area Superintendent of Schools, when I retired in 2000, because of my commitment to students and my belief that positive change can happen if we make it happen, working with administrators and parents.
http://maryelizabethsings.wordpress.com/2012/01/15/about-education-essay-1-mastery-learning/
pinksuz
June 28th, 2012
9:14 pm
Thank you so much for writing this article! Teaching has always been my passion, but last year was a trial with 39 children in my 4th grade classroom, all the grade level special ed, ESOL, 10 gifted, and the remainder in the RTI process. I spent more time in meetings than in my classroom teaching (or should I say collecting data). This is the first summer in my teaching career that I have not been busily preparing for my new students in August.
Anonmom
June 29th, 2012
7:59 am
I think in 10 or 15 years we, as a society, are going to very short on both doctors and teachers, particularly very good ones. These are professions with “long” entry “systems” — you can’t snap your fingers and be able to be in a job as one the next month (slightly easier with teachers than doctors, but not for someone to be really good)– it takes a solid 8 years, at least, to be a physician — we, as a society — are being very short sighted with many of our current policies and we could find ourselves looking a lot like a 3rd world country in 20 or 25 years if we’re not more careful.
Betty Cloer Wallace
June 29th, 2012
11:32 am
This is an old book, but more relevant now than ever before.
http://www.amazon.com/Poisoned-Apple-Bell-Curve-Schools-Mediocrity/dp/0312118767/ref=sr_1_9?s=books&ie=UTF8&qid=1340983447&sr=1-9&keywords=poisoned+apple
A teacher explains why she gave up a career she loved | Get Schooled | Leading Schools | Scoop.it
June 30th, 2012
6:17 pm
[...] Jordan Kohanim is a former Fulton County high school teacher and one of my favorite posters on the blog because of her eloquence, her candor and her… [...]
ldew
July 5th, 2012
5:41 pm
I know what Jordon is talking about, I am there but I’m to close to retirement. I have two years left to teach. I still love to teach. If the state would stay out of education we would be better off. As soon as I can I will retire, even if I’m not really ready.
ellie
July 6th, 2012
10:17 am
When I read these comments that say “boo hoo, etc.” it makes me so angry. I have been teaching too long to get out now, I work 6 hours straight, no break, not even a lunch break, and I have to eat that in 20 minutes, being told where I have to sit. There has been times when I have had to stay 10 hours because of meetings, not by choice. But that’s okay because I have to work a MINIMUM of 8 hours, so they can keep us as long as they want. What other professional would put up with that? I love teaching, love my students, I am successful, and have the test scores to prove it. You would think we would be treated with respect, instead of being intimidated, threatened. We all complain, but yet take it. Someday maybe teachers will band together and say we have had enough. A school system is only as strong as it’s teachers. Why don’t they realize that? The quality of a system is based on test scores, teachers get those scores. Our pay keeps decreasing. Remember the saying, “you get what you pay for”.
Schltchr
July 7th, 2012
9:25 am
I applaud you, Jordan for your candid commentary, too. Do not feel frustration or guilt. Do what you must to maintain your sanity. You are a teacher as is evidenced by your new found occupation. Continue to perfect your craft and support the educaton of others. That is what teaching is about. Being a teacher is not attached to a location or physical building–note online education for all levels, home schooling and tutors in public libraries, etc.
Keep your head up and your heart, too. TEACH MY FRIEND, TEACH! Best wishes to you.
#deantwalbc3@aol.com
Rebecca
July 9th, 2012
2:30 pm
It is sad that education has come to this. I took an early retirement. Not as much money but a lot more happiness. Enjoy your new job!
On Leaving Teaching « It Starts With Schools
July 9th, 2012
4:14 pm
[...] I was saw echoes of myself in this (now-former) teacher’s story in the AJC, and I thought about my decision a little more. I taught the same subject, at the same grade level, [...]
Al Nosidda
July 10th, 2012
2:46 pm
Wow! To know that someone else shares the same sentiment is amazing! What’s disturbing is that we have to and are willing to make such choices because the personal sacrifices are no longer compensated by the intrinsic reward of loving to teach, which many great teachers used to motivate them year after year since external rewards were few and far between. Needless to say, I am not endorsing merit pay or some other system for assigning trophies to those who need the criteria for great teaching. Really, all we want is the respect that’s shown in truly acknowledging that today’s classroom is vastly different than years past. Increasing class size and teacher expectations while
decreasing resources and student/parent expectations is unreasonable, disrespectful, and a disservice to those of us who are “called” to teach. It is why Jordan physically left the classroom and why many others have mentally checked out as well.
Randy
July 22nd, 2012
3:45 pm
We (the soldiers in the field) classroom teachers and building level administrators must work to educate the GENERAL PUBLIC … our schools are in CRISIS. We need more time, resources, technical support, social work assistance, clerical help, etc … when our military did not have the resources necessary to succeed it was a CALL to ARMS …. we need that same public support.
Randy V.
35 years in the trenches