Why didn’t someone save Phoebe Prince from unrelenting bullying?
The fierce response of a Massachusetts district attorney to the suicide of a teen bullying victim — the prosecutor brought charges today against nine teenagers — reflects the increasing concern over school bullying, concerns that have grown as intimidation and taunting have gone viral over the Internet.
Nine teens face charges in the suicide of alleged bullying victim Phoebe Prince
Pursued with unusual cruelty by a group of students at her new high school, Phoebe Prince, 15, hanged herself in January. She had enrolled at the school in the fall after moving to the United States from Ireland, which may contributed to her victimization at South Hadley High School.
According to the AJC story:
Phoebe, ostracized for having a brief relationship with a popular boy, reached her breaking point and hanged herself after one particularly hellish day in January — a day that, according to officials, included being hounded with slurs and pelted with a beverage container as she walked home from school.
Now, nine teenagers face charges in what a prosecutor called “unrelenting” bullying, including two teen boys charged with statutory rape and a clique of girls charged with stalking, criminal harassment and violating Phoebe’s civil rights.
Northwestern District Attorney Elizabeth Scheibel, who announced the charges Monday, said the events before Phoebe’s death on Jan. 14 were “the culmination of a nearly three-month campaign of verbally assaultive behavior and threats of physical harm” widely known among the student body.
School officials won’t be charged, even though authorities say they knew about the bullying and that Phoebe’s mother brought her concerns to at least two of them.
For those of you who work in schools, why would administrators and teachers let this persecution go unchecked?
Research shows that bullying occurs in all schools, private and public, and that it is often unseen by adults. In an earlier blog on bullying, I cited a 2005 U.S. Department of Education report that found 14 percent of students ages 12 through 18 said they had been bullied in the past six months.
In the early grades, bullies direct their attacks at almost anyone. As they get older, they target certain kids. Bullies go after younger and smaller kids, but victims also are chosen because they are more anxious, sensitive, cautious and quiet.
Bullying is often a spectator sport, with 85 percent of incidents involving other kids who watch the torment without stopping it. On the day of her suicide, Phoebe was abused her in the school library, the lunchroom and the hallways, according to the charges. Classmates threw a canned drink at her as she walked home, where her sister found her hanging from a stairwell at 4:30 p.m.
While Phoebe’s bullies used texting and social networking sites to harass her, the prosecutor said most of the bullying occurred on school grounds during school hours.
In the next few days, we will likely see the families of the nine teens charged defend their children, who are already being depicted as monsters.
What is happening that such cruelty could be tolerated? Why didn’t other students speak out? Why didn’t the adults step in?
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243 comments Add your comment
jane
March 30th, 2010
4:37 pm
Tina;
“If you asked everyone in america if they were ever called, a slut, had a terrible nickname, or had some mean girls scribble tuna tina on the bathroom walls and found tuna in thier mail box. They would say yes”
Does that mean that it’s OK? No, it doesn’t.
Philosopher
March 30th, 2010
4:42 pm
@tina: following your logic…because lots of men in our society rape women, it’s the woman’s fault when she’s raped if she is unable to fight him off?! RIGHT!
jane
March 30th, 2010
4:43 pm
And Josey, those 9 kids should have thought about the consequences of their actions, not only during, but also after this girl had killed herself .The fact that they continued to mock this poor girl even in death should show even someone like you – that these kids are uncommonly cruel and cold-hearted.
Enya
March 30th, 2010
4:53 pm
i repress my anger because in over 35 years endentured to this triviality i remain offended by this legal system but pray be for this life the stand etudiede
jane
March 30th, 2010
4:53 pm
Josie,
Those 9 kids should have thought aboutf the consequences to their actions not only during but after this girl killed herself. The fact that they continued to mock this poor girl even in death can show (even someone like you) what uncaring, cold-hearted individuals were involved here. This is CLEARLY not just some girl who was being teased at school – these actions were much more sinister. You need to learn some compassion.
Enya
March 30th, 2010
4:53 pm
Quite frankly put they will not leave america again
Enya
March 30th, 2010
4:54 pm
remain yourself i have stated this pubically Enter your comments here
MV
March 30th, 2010
4:55 pm
Ole Guy – you are a complete and total idiot.
mike bohenek
March 30th, 2010
5:00 pm
These comments suggest the varying thoughts and opinions about bullying and the unfortunate death of Phoebe Prince. The truth in the matter is bullying has been around for a very long time. The child bullies usally go unpunished and become abusive adults. These abusive adults are the abusive bosses or the neighbors from hell.
The school administration along with the nine bullies should be held accountable for there actions.in contributing to the death of this young girl, Phoebe Prince. Phoebe was supposed to visit her father in Ireland this month, but this is not what her father had in mind, for his daughter to arrive in a casket.
Maybe, Americans will learn something from this unfortunate incident…
Jessie
March 30th, 2010
5:01 pm
I think that the kids who knew about it should have reported and helped Phoebe out. Also the teachers should have listened and done something about it. It doesn’t matter if your a female or male.
jane
March 30th, 2010
5:01 pm
Josey, those 9 kids should have thought about the consequences to their actions not only during but after this girl killed herself. The fact that they continued to mock this poor girl AFTER she took her own life should show (even you) that they are uncaring, cold-hearted individuals. Clearly this was not just some kids teasing a girl – it was much more sinister than that and these kids WANTED to act cruel, and now they need to own up to it. I think you need to learn some compassion.
(I tried to post this a couple times and it didn’t show up so I apologize if for some reason there is multiple posts that look generally alike)
jane
March 30th, 2010
5:08 pm
Josey, those 9 kids should have thought about the consequences to their actions not only during but after this girl killed herself. The fact that they continued to mock this poor girl AFTER she took her own life should show (even you) that they are uncaring, cold-hearted individuals. Clearly this was not just some kids teasing a girl – it was much more sinister than that and these kids WANTED to act cruel, and now they need to own up to it. I think you need to learn some compassion.
Joel
March 30th, 2010
5:09 pm
You guys are freaking idiots if you think these kids should go to jail. The kids bullied the girl. That is all they did. The girl took her own life. If you really think the 9 bullies deserve to go to jail then every time a high school student bullies another, that student would then have to be incarcerated.
jean
March 30th, 2010
5:12 pm
Josey & Joel those 9 kids should have thought about the consequences to their actions not only during but after this girl killed herself. The fact that they continued to mock this poor girl AFTER she took her own life should show (even you) that they are uncaring, cold-hearted individuals. Clearly this was not just some kids teasing a girl – it was much more sinister than that and these kids WANTED to act cruel, and now they need to own up to it. I think you need to learn some compassion.
(I tried to post this a couple times and it didn’t show up so I apologize if for some reason there is multiple posts that look generally alike)
Philosopher
March 30th, 2010
5:19 pm
@ MV: Ole Guy is not an idiot of any sort…but he describes a day and time that no longer exists and probably never has for girls. These are wickedly scary times and kids are not only NOT taught much right and wrong, or held to any standards of honor, but they are daily inundated with violence and vicious behavior on TV and computers. They are mimicking these behaviors in real life and the bullying going on today is NOTHING like what was happening when I was in school. I am totally and completely against violence for any reason other than self-defense…but other people have had experiences I haven’t had that color their actions and beliefs. While I disagree with Ole Guy on many things, I still respect him…I’d bet everything he does is based on a code of honor-nice to know some folks have one. So let’s be civilized and refrain from calling names..it’s bullying, after all! (Bet he can hold his own against any bully, too!
)
Georgia Teacher
March 30th, 2010
5:35 pm
I, too, was the victim of bullying.
When I was in elementary school, a group of boys decided to pick on me because I was a “Yankee.” I suppose I was since I was born in Athens, GA, but I had moved to a small city in Louisiana and I was an outsider.
My mother taught me never to fight, so I didn’t. I later found out it was a huge source of arguement between her and my father.
Finally, my mother relented and my father was allowed to teach me to fight back. I did. I was not picked on again at that school.
Why? Simple. Bullies are generally cowards and lazy. It is not much fun to pick on someone who fights back.
When I moved to back to Georgia several years later in eighth grade, I became a target again, but I knew what to do. I challenged the chief bully to a fight after school. He broke my nose. I broke his arm. I was never picked on again. Why? I was not easy meat. As my father taught: “It does not matter if you win or lose as long as the guy picking on you feels it in the morning.”
Yes, for boys, violence does solve problems from time to time.
That said, this is how boys deal with problems. Not girls. Quite honestly, girls (and grown women for that matter) can be cruel. I am not sure how a woman deals with that.
Students these days, however, are not allowed to fight back or to stand up to other students. We preach doing the right thing in character education, but we punish those who stand up for those who can’t stand up for themselves.
In the classroom, I do not tolerate bullying or general disrespect of other students at all.
@Anthony:
Point of fact: There are no “commandos” in the Marines. The only “commandos” in the US military are the Air Commando units in the Air Force. “Commando” is a British term. In the US military, special operations folks are referred to as “operators.” Please, on behalf of all of those who served, get your terminology correct.
Georgia Teacher
March 30th, 2010
5:37 pm
Caught in the filter!
John
March 30th, 2010
5:47 pm
This burns my A__ that anyone could drive someone to do something like this. Not only do those responsible need to be severly punished, but the school officals who were aware of what was going on and did nothing should go to jail for a very long time. How the school is not being charged for failing to stop Phoebe Prince’s harassment and resulting in her death is a crime. That’s part of what is wrong with this country! All of these people need to be held responsible and send a message to everyone so that this will not ever happen again. God rest her soul. I hope those spineless people who drove her to kill herself pay dearly. They are cowards!
Ole Guy
March 30th, 2010
6:28 pm
MV, based on your “indepth” comment, I seriously doubt you possess the intelect to contribute any but the most superficial comments. Furthermore, I am willing to bet that your sense of humanity is so lacking as to post any socialy redeeming thoughts on this tragedy. Rather than go into the “sticks n’ stones” thing, for you, sir, I will go straight to the issue…GFY!
Philo, your observations should reverberate throughout the readership…by participating, we all AGREE TO DISAGREE.
There are many who feel that jail time for these bullies would be inappropriate. While they caused her death, I believe there was also rape involved. As far as I’m concerned, these kids, regardless of their ages, are completely beyond redemption. Like many of this generation, they have been steeped with endless second chances. Their only usefulness to mankind is cracking rocks and making license plates. Left to my devices, I would hang every one of em.
Joseph Allard
March 30th, 2010
6:48 pm
Perhaps these teens need to spend the rest of their natural life in prison where bullying is the norm. See how they like it. Or, at the very least their parents need to be charged as well, for raising unruly kids.
TS-4525
March 30th, 2010
6:51 pm
This reminds me of a similar case in California involving a boy. He moved to California from the East Coast where he was a popular athlete. In his California high school he didn’t fit in and was tormented to the point where he broke and brought a gun to school and shot several students and himself. I wonder if Phoebe had been a boy if the outcome would have been different? Typically bullies are popular and well liked by school staff and put on a good front for everyone. That is why it is even more important to listen to complaints of bullying and create a safe environment for kids to report such actions. When schools have a zero tolerance to bullying things can change.
Feeling for Phoebe
March 30th, 2010
6:54 pm
@Josey – please leave your “enlightening” words of wisdom and thought provoking analysis about the mental state of the DA for your myspace audience where it will perhaps be, frighteningly enough, more appreciated.
@Joel – and you’re a friggin idiot if you think all these “kids” did was bully this girl. They ganged up on her, they stalked her, they harassed her, they raped her and they blatantly terrorized her both online and in front of school officials. They planned their attack, struck where it would do the most damage and even celebrated when it was over. They are no different than the terrorists who bombed our country on 9/11.
These “kids” ruined Phoebe’s life and in doing so their own lives. Now they have to pay the consequences. I hope Massachusettes reinstates the death penalty and makes examples out of all of them.
sandee
March 30th, 2010
6:58 pm
Well I think that bullies don’t have a life these days, they need to find something to do, instead of bullyin ppl, and its the parents fault that they are bullying bcuz the parents didn’t teach them any manners or respect, and if ppl want respect they have to earn it
Jose
March 30th, 2010
7:06 pm
Taxpayers should not shoulder their lifetime imprisonment expenses for a long time, if ever they will be convicted. They need to be “outsource” for only 3-days or less to an Asian prison camp where their butt will be whacked for good so they will understand what “bullying” is all about.
Philosopher
March 30th, 2010
7:10 pm
@Josey: I am curious why you think these thugs, with what is known about their bullying and raping of this young girl, should go skipping merrily on their way. Really, seriously, on what do you base such an attitude? Personal behaviors, perhaps? Is bullying part of your repertoir? I can’t think of ANY rational excuse in the world to let these kids go unpunished or to condone or support them in their heinous crimes…not a single one!
Wait, hold on...
March 30th, 2010
7:18 pm
When did we reach the point where multiple sexual assaults are deemed “bullying”?
bootney farnsworth
March 30th, 2010
7:26 pm
@ Josey & Mike
was she asking for it?
did she get what she deserved?
should we give these predators medals for removing
someone not up to your standards from the gene pool?
bootney farnsworth
March 30th, 2010
7:27 pm
I am curious what her parents did or didn’t do while this was occuring.
what did they know, and when did they know it.
bootney farnsworth
March 30th, 2010
7:29 pm
@ Joel
so we should just ignore the rape bit?
chalk it up to boys will be boys?
Dr Golden
March 30th, 2010
7:48 pm
You all have posted so many opinions about these kids being prosecuted, but the real crime here is rooted in this question, “Where was your father Phoebe?” If something happened to my daughter a first time, i go to the school. If something happens a second time, i go to the bullies parents. If something happens a third time. I stop it myself by ANY MEANS NECESSARY.
I read EVERY comment on this post and Not one of u asked the question. Where is her father? SAD sad story, of course, but no Man stepped in, and that is what was needed most of all. Boys fight in playgrounds, i hope that never ends. My friends fought with me too. Some of em still do.
Prosecution? I think not. They are all suffering now and will for life. That’s punishment enough.
Dr Golden
March 30th, 2010
7:50 pm
In regards to the rape, which was probably the most instrumental cause of the suicide, that boy or boys should be prosecuted to the fullest extent of the law.
Phoebe Prince Facebook Comments | VsCon
March 30th, 2010
8:07 pm
[...] [...]
Phoebe Prince Facebook Comments - Keada
March 30th, 2010
8:40 pm
[...] Prince hanged herself in January. Authorities say she endured months of verbal assaults and threatsPhoebe Prince Facebook Comments – Barbara Coloroso said she consulted with parents and administrators months before 15-year-old [...]
magi
March 30th, 2010
8:41 pm
I first read about Phoebe’s suicide last month. The problem arose when a boy one of the bullies was interested in took an interest in Phoebe. The article indicated that little was done to her abusers because the school is in an upscale community where the parents have quite a bit of influence in the school and community. It was later reported on the same web site, True Crime Report, that a few of the students were expelled. IMHO, this is a good move on the part of the prosecutor. That it had to get to the point where Phoebe killed herself is the most painful aspect of this situation for me.
magi
March 30th, 2010
8:45 pm
Dr. Golden,
Although it was not stated in this post, BOTH of Phoebe’s parents moved to Pennsylvania from Ireland, and IIRC, one of them was already an American citizen.
Joe Public
March 30th, 2010
8:59 pm
Where were the parents of this girl during all of this? Also, it seems to me that she decided to have sex with one of the other girls’ ex-bf’s…. and then with another guy… she really should have been more closed-legs IMHO…. however, that is definitely not a reason to harass and bully her… though that stuff happens anytime you have social relationship conflicts between little boys and girls.. hell, it happens with adults and usually ends up with someone dead… not by hanging though…..
Philosopher
March 30th, 2010
9:45 pm
Joe Public: Whether it was rape or consensual, the girl did not seserve what happened to her. Your words and attitude are absolutely disgusting! It is attitudes such as yours that perpetuate the behaviors that these kids engaged in!
Phoebe Prince Facebook Comments - oSeat
March 30th, 2010
9:53 pm
[...] Leave a comment Go to comments. Phoebe Prince, South Hadley High School's 'new girl,' driven to suicPhoebe Prince Facebook Comments – Atheist and Catholic School Bullies and Stalkers Rejoice In Murdering Teens. March 30, 2010 [...]
Michelle
March 30th, 2010
10:16 pm
When are we as a society going to realize that “ALL” people have a GOD-given and inherent right to be at PEACE!!! No, not the peace that this young girl felt to be her only escape, but the peace of feeling/being safe, secure, protected from Abuse & Abusive persons {YES, THIS INCLUDES THESE MONSTEROUS BULLY-KIDS}. Personally, I would love to know that these PREDATORS were Extremely-bullied themselves before, during, & after life-long PRISON-TERMS. I mean Natural-life, They took one, they should have to give one!!! God, forbid these inhumane creatures be given the opportunity to have children themselves, {I Pray their children will not have to pay the price for their parents having been so ill-prepared to be HUMAN}!!! GOD, BLESS Phoebe’s Family/Friends & Loved One’s & Hold & Keep HER, ETERNALLY, SAFE, SECURE, & VERY MUCH at PEACE!!!!!!!!!!
Alphagrl
March 30th, 2010
10:17 pm
I realize bullying has been around forever. Bullies have very few brain cells and it is empowering to these types to pick on those who are, in their minds, vulnerable and/or different. One bully is bad enough, now we have group bullying, or tag team bullying.
I was the girl in school who defended the kids that the bullies tormented. Why, because I was taught, from a very young age, to be a critical, independent thinker and to respect everyone, until I had a good reason not to. Obviously, the bullies weren’t given the appropriate tools to respect themselves, or maybe they weren’t given the genetics to communicate effectively, so they externalize, hurting others. That’s just wrong!!! I LOATHE BULLIES AND IGNORANCE!!! They’re not mutually exclusive. Worst emotion I’m having when reading about this is, the way I want to smash the skulls in of these 9 kids who did this…can’t believe they’re able to evoke such rage in me. I truly hope the legal system works and that these kids, not only pay for their actions/behavior, but that they are able to be cured. There is no room on earth for this kind of behavior from human to human.
My sincere thoughts to the families involved in this, especially to Phoebe’s family…so sorry for their loss.
mother
March 30th, 2010
10:24 pm
@ Ole Guy – please Go Away.
If a parent goes to administrator and says their child is being bullied, they better start paying attention. I know first hand that administrators often do not care enough to do anything. I know a lot of parents who run into administrators who feel Kids will be Kids, which is far from the truth. It seems these days bullying has become more vicious and vile and bullies often become tomorrows felons. Shame on any administrator who ignores this problem. They should be charged with accessory to the crime – but you know what – they are all immune and above the law in a lot of instances
Aamina
March 31st, 2010
12:17 am
Most of you are forgetting- in many other articles there is more information given about the victim and her family, and the overall situation.
1) they recently moved from Ireland- hmm, you think Phoebe P. had tons of friends to support her?
2) [dr. golden] her mother complained to the school twice about her daughters distress–> meaning the school failed to respond- a little to late are we?
3) These 9 kids couldnt care less about Phoebe’s death- on the note of this discovery they showed no signs of remorse.
You can point your fingers to the parents— but lets think about this for a second, more specifically lets take a look at the average citizen in America.
Yes, parents tend to neglect their childs need, many of them do grow up raised by media— but is this intentional? Do they do it “INTENTIONALLY”?-
Consider: The average American parent(s) IS BUSTING THEIR *** WORKING HARD TO KEEP THEIR JOBS, WORKING HARD BY WORKING OVERTIME, SACRIFICING THEIR TIME WITH FAMILY IN ORDER TO KEEP THEIR HOMES and FAMILIES FUNCTIONAL. Reality is they don’t get too much time with their children- they depend on schools to help mold them. After all, a school is a second home for several kids.
She [ the mother ] made a few attempts with the school— my concern lies with school staff— what the f were they doing when the student body was posting and sending pictures of her throughtout the school, facebook, and myspace ? they admitted they knew—then why did they not kick it.
You all are getting carried away on the subject at hand by analyizing parenting methods ( the deed is done, a death was a result—whats the next step America. Should we wait for a few more kids to hang themselves or blow of their heads and continue to be ignorant fools?
I agree with PHILOSOPHER: he exerted that regardless of parenting and bully prevention programs some kids are simply just sensitive to the bullying—they can’t “handle” it or “let go” as easily as others can— and it is absolutely understandable that they should not have to- if anything the school needs to work on their communication with student body- teacher-student relations so kids have a authority figure; to let their voice be heard- and that it is not so hard for them to do so.
Aamina
March 31st, 2010
12:26 am
these teenagers got the charges they deserved ( after careful considerations in court and much research-the court came to a legit verdict) – and let it be a lesson to all- damaging the human soul so severely is unjust and immoral.
Aamina
March 31st, 2010
12:36 am
her social life should not be an issue.
although my concern does lie with the fact that one of the teenagers was charged with sat rape–meaning this is not the heinous form of “rape” as many of u may understand it to be; im pretty sure that Phoebo did consent to engaging in sex with this 18 year old boy senior boy— my opinion for his charge means he must of sent around dirty pics of her, or abused her image with their sexual acts one way or another and that is why he got charged—in which I agree with charges.
it doesnt matter if one choose to engage in sexual activity at a young age– this is something new- the fact is that she didnt deserve to be abused in the manner she was. Suicide should not be an option for children- they should be given the opportunity –> help-.
Aamina
March 31st, 2010
12:38 am
chose* and not something new***
Ole Guy
March 31st, 2010
1:36 am
Mom, you will find no arguements from me; I agree wholeheartedly with every word you write, and with every thought, I presume, is behind those words. I do often express myself, both in writing and by speech, in what may gently be viewed as devoid of pc strictures. If this annoys you, I sincerely appologize. However, the only way you will save your eyes from having to cast upon my words will be to either ignore Ole Guy comments or don’t participate in this blog series…have a great day, Mom!
Roxy
March 31st, 2010
6:01 am
Bullies learn how to be so from home, from their bully PARENTS! Too many wacko parents try to bully their way around the teachers and administrators. The kids learn how to bully from Mommy and Daddy’s example.
Joel
March 31st, 2010
7:50 am
Guys, if the bullying was SO bad shouldn’t the parents have done something about it by now? Shouldn’t they have pulled her out of school or something? Also, let’s clear something up; one of these boys had a prior conviction of STUATORY RAPE. None of these boy held any body down and raped them they simply had sex with an under aged girl a few months ago. I think we need to blame this on bad parenting for not taking care of the problem before their child did!
Joel
March 31st, 2010
8:13 am
Also a 18 year old guy can be arrested for having sex with a 17 year and ll month old girl if the parents are mad enough about it. I know it is wrong to bully, but jail? Alot of teens commit suicide these days and alot of times it is because they feel rejected by their father or another family member. Like this case, I know it is wrong to walk out on your family but if she commits suicide is the father now responsible?
Ash
March 31st, 2010
2:02 pm
This is to those of you who believe that Phoebe is at fault, and should have done something to defend herself:
Do you honestly believe, that one girl against many could protect herself against the harassment of her classmates? No. You’re very ignorant for believing that it would be that simple. I was bullied in high school. Constantly. I’m still bullied and I’m in college. What did I do wrong? I was smart, quiet, and would rather spend my time reading and studying instead of partying. Let me tell you something, I tried to defend myself. But there is only so much one can do in the face of a death threat. It probably wasn’t simple for Phoebe either. People ganged up on her. It wasn’t just one person she could punch and that be the end of it. What is punching someone going to solve anyway? It’s definitely not going to prove that you’re the bigger person. It’s just immature. Even if she had tried to fight, she would have probably gotten her butt kicked by the GROUP of bullies. And then gotten in trouble for starting a fight in the first place. I’m certain that she probably attempted to defend herself in some way. And obviously her mother did by going to the school administration who did nothing. From there, there is not much more you can do. I feel so horribly for this poor girl and her family. I know what it’s like to feel that there is no way out. Kids in high school can be extremely cruel…more so than any other place I’ve encountered. For people to pick on her and abuse her in such a manner is just plain inexcusable. And the people commenting on how she’s to blame, you make me sick. These kids deserve to be punished. They deserve to have to do time for the crimes they have committed. This isn’t something to take lightly. A girl lost her life. She was important to someone, and loved. I never met this girl, and she still means something to me. I was never able to understand how people could do so much to intentionally hurt someone. When words are used maliciously, and posted online or sent through mass text, they can be extremely painful. A young girl who is in the process of trying to figure out who she is, does not deserve that kind of harsh treatment. No one does. Every single person on this Earth deserves to be treated fairly and with some sort of respect. As soon as that boundary is crossed, you’re wrong. Of course it’s irrational to think that you’re going to like everyone and get along with them. But that in no way acts as an excuse to abuse someone simply for your own satisfaction. Put yourself in Phoebe’s shoes. What would you have done? How would you have reacted? Maybe not in the same way, but I think it’s safe to assume that most people would feel pretty horribly about themselves after being treated in such a manner.