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Usher opens up to Oprah

First Look: Usher on Oprah’s Next Chapter

Rule number one when you go visit Usher: remove your shoes.

Even if you’re Oprah.

The queen bee interviewer learned that quickly when she recently visited Usher at his Alpharetta home for an installment of “Oprah’s Next Chapter,” which aired on OWN Sunday night.

During the hour-long sitdown in a sunroom off Usher’s airy kitchen and a room with walls decorated with children’s (presumably his) artwork, Usher responded to Oprah’s questions about his failed marriage to Tameka Foster; his recently won custody battle of their two children, Usher V, 4, and Naviyd, 3; his relationship with his mom, Jonetta Patton (who also appeared on the show); the tragic death of his stepson, Kile Glover; and his fidelity to Foster.

Usher said he invited Oprah because he wanted her to see his “crib,” complete with treehouse in the backyard for the kids, and also so that he could “document” his experiences, with the plan to never discuss many of these issues publicly again.

“I’ve been a man of integrity throughout the entire process,” he said in reference to the custody battle, which Foster appealed, but was reportedly denied.

Here’s what he had to say about:

Relieving his mother of her duties as his longtime manager in 2007, shortly after his marriage, of which she openly disapproved.

“I never fired her…there was an opportunity to be a grandmother, to have what truly matters, which was family, which was why I wanted there to be that separation [so they wouldn’t have to fight over business issues]”.

How he felt about the negative reaction of fans and the public to his marriage.
“Of course it hurt me. This is supposed to be the light of my life, and nobody is responding the way I’d like them to respond. There were times when [Tameka and I] both spoke out and we shouldn’t. My relationship was always supposed to be about me and her.”

He also regretted his decision to go on MTV to defend his then-wife. “If this is someone you choose, then that’s who you chose.”

On being faithful to Foster.
“Towards the end of our marriage I found myself lost, and I just wanted out,” he said, then paused, licked his lips and stared out the window for a moment. “No. I was faithful at heart, but not faithful all the way. Even having a conversation with another woman, period, about matters of your relationship or emotions is, in my opinion, not being faithful.”

Oprah pressed, “But were you with another woman sexually?”

“When we were separated, yes, I was. We were not divorced,” Usher responded.
Oprah brought up the oft-discussed claim that Usher cheated on Foster with her friend who was a bridesmaid at their wedding.

“The conversation about the bridesmaid has always been one that’s been complicated,” he said. “Outside of my marriage and our separation and our divorce, I did have exchanges with [the bridesmaid]. We were friends. She was someone who was part of the children’s lives before.”

About the Kile Glover tragedy.
“I miss Kile,” Usher said, his voice cracking and eyes tearing up. He told Oprah he was in Los Angeles at the time of the accident and reached out “respectfully” to Ryan Glover, the boy’s father, and was able to get Foster on a plane back to Atlanta.

“We cooked together, we laughed, we sang. He loved to sing and dance, he loved to tell jokes,” Usher said of Kile.

He also put to rest the speculation that he didn’t visit Kile in the hospital or attend his funeral. He did visit the 11-year-old in the hospital and said, “It hurts me to hear people speculating that I wasn’t at the funeral. I absolutely was at the funeral. I was at the burial as well.”

Oprah lightened the mood and asked Usher if he had ever been intimate with someone with his own music in the background.
“Some may say this may be rather narcissistic, but, um, yeah. I’m a good motivator for the moment. Some guys don’t take their time; they don’t even put music on. I like to set the mood. A little Luther [Vandross], Marvin Gaye, then your more modern songs, like Usher.”

Usher’s mom, Jonetta Patton, who lives around the corner and is a daily presence in his home, joined the interview.
Oprah first asked her how she reacted to the news that Usher won his custody battle.

“I was so excited, for him, for myself, because I know it’s been really hard. It’s a lot of pressure, but for him to receive what he fought so hard for was so rewarding.”

Oprah also wanted to know if Patton ever gave Usher the “I told you so,” treatment about Foster.

“I never said, ‘I told you so’…if you learn something from this, [then] it’s OK. He said to me, ‘I’m sorry, I should have listened.’ He owned it. That was really special.”

And as for whether Patton is the type of mom who feels that no woman will be good enough for her son, she answered emphatically.

“I do have high standards, but there are women who are good enough for him.”

“You just didn’t believe that his ex-wife was the right person for him?” Oprah continued.

“Right,” Patton said. “I didn’t.”

Follow me on Twitter @ajc_music.

By Melissa Ruggieri, Atlanta Music Scene

28 comments Add your comment

Zor

September 16th, 2012
11:22 pm

Atlanta is a city of women who have never been married or loved. They have been cheated on and lied to and frankly are very bitter. The treatment of Tameka was disgraceful. We must respect other women. It is hard enough to stay married as it is. Without outsiders interfering. Let your light shine
and maybe love can find it’s way into you life and heart.

Janie

September 17th, 2012
12:03 am

Usher lied throughout this entire interview! It was clear that his “team’ called up Mother Oprah to clean up the mess he’s made of his image. This man sought out to totally remove his son’s mother from their lives just because he can’t get along with her! She wasn’t found to be a bad mother but he admitted to being a liar and a cheat! Just because a judge ruled in his favor does NOT make him the best choice as a parent. What was wrong with joint 50/50 custody? Usher is a bitter bitter man!

Bill

September 17th, 2012
12:26 am

Usher turned his back on Chattanooga! He doesn’t claim Chattanooga anymore! You have to remember where you came from!!!

Dee

September 17th, 2012
1:25 am

Ok, since Usher is the first man to cheat on his wife let’s just wake up tomorrow and stone him…really. I don’t condone it, but there are always factors that lead to it. What I would have really loved to know is why is he always attracted to these older women. She was around 8 yrs older, previously married with 3 kids, why would she then get pregnant without building a stable foundation for their relationship, and then expects Usher who is behaving like the 20 something yr old that he is to be the mature husband that she expects. Plus with having children back to back, your body doesn’t even get time to heal, I’m sure he wasn’t getting much. So there is enough blame to go around I believe, what I don’t like is airing it in public.

They both need to squash this and I hope he keeps his promise not to talk about it anymore. To all those women out there, before YOU BRING a child into this world, make sure your relationship is the best it can be at that time. Usher may not have a been good husband but I firmly believe that he is a good father and now that the kids are not being used as a wedge, maybe both parties will find a healthy way to co-parent.

trinilicious

September 17th, 2012
3:45 am

OK LEAVE USHER ALONE HE GOT THE BOYS HE CAN BE A GOOD ROLE MODEL FOR THEM AND AS THEY GET OLDER THEY CAN BE A ROLE MODEL THAT HE DOSENT HAVE TO CHEAT.WE SHOULD BE GLAD TO SEE A MAN BLACK, WHITE,HISPANIC ETC. STEPPING UP TO WANT TO FATHER THEIR KIDS.CUZ YOUR THE MUM DOES NOT MAKE YOU THE BEST CHOICE TO PARENT.WHETHER HE LIED OR NOT I THINK HE IS A GREAT FATHER AND LETS ALLOW HIM TO BE A FATHER.IM SO PROUD OF YOU USHER AND IF YOU EVER NEED A NANNY YOUR WELCOME TO EMAIL ME NY WAY GOODLUCK TO U ENJOY THOSE TWO BLESSINGS THAT YOU HAVE.

Pray1st

September 17th, 2012
6:34 am

WOW! Interesting interview. Prayers go out to Tameka Foster. She has lost so much in such a short time. She lost her way, her own identity, her marriage, her son to death, two more sons w/out child support, and now even Usher’s friendship. I remember when everyone hated Robin Givens. LOL People have got to learn to stop jumping on bandwagons and judging people. There is no way anyone was going to like Tameka after he had dated and cheated on Chilli. Tameka was never going to compare to Chilli. It’s like Prince Charles marrying Camilla after Diana. She will always be hated. The two women were drastically different.

I am happy for Usher and I sincerely hope he is able to raise his children to be responsible, positive, focused men. The issue he must face and accept is that they are seed of Tameka and there is no way they will have Chilli’s heart, spirit or demeanor. They will have Tameka’s. So he needs to make certain that he can really accept that and not try to take away that part of their DNA. They are flesh of her flesh and blood of her blood. You can’t love them and hate her.

Many Kudo’s to his mom for keeping her mouth shut all these years. I am sure that was very difficult. No mom, single or married, wants her child to have anyone but the best. Apparently, she was right. I just hope Usher owns up to his role in the mistakes he made, and learns from them otherwise, he will find out that there are alot of Tameka’s, out there waiting to take him for his money and he will be no better off with them than he would have been with her.

Disgusting

September 17th, 2012
6:39 am

Usher is a spoiled, lying, cheating pathetic man.
And his mother is a sick woman who’s in love with her son.
Usher just proved to me that he’s a punk bitch mama’s boy 100%. I hope Tameka Foster bankrupt him!!!

Bunnie

September 17th, 2012
7:29 am

Um, taking her other two children away days after she buried a son is classless and there’s nothing Oprah can do to clean up public opinion about that.

pw

September 17th, 2012
7:50 am

While people are anointing her Saint Tameka just remember that this is a woman who already had 3 children that she did not have custody of when she went after Usher and you have to know that she went after him. Once she got him she pumped out two quick babies in her bid to hold onto him because she knew he realized this was not a good choice for him. Remember that the marriage was called off twice. Go online and see if you can find this grieving mother in court just weeks after her son died so tragically. See and hear the venom that the judge heard at a hearing she, Tameka, insisted on having after Usher asked for a delay. See and hear her continuing to bash their 2 year marriage to the point where she is finally told that they were not there to rehash their marriage and divorce but decide what was in the best interest of the boys. She has attacked him physically and gone after his girlfriend physically. This is a woman who is unstable and the judge did what was best. Is Usher a saint? No but she picked him and better than anyone she knew who he was and what he was like. I think he’s learned in a painful way, what being a man entails and is now working on being the man he wants his sons to be. Give him a break folks and pray that Tameka gets the help she so obviously needs.

LEW

September 17th, 2012
8:30 am

Amen, well said PW.

Usher Fan

September 17th, 2012
8:31 am

S/He who is without sin, cast the first stone so it says in the Bible. May God bless them both as they get on about the buisness of parenting their children and living their lives. Usher was a not a child when he married, but he was caught up in the rebound from his fall out with Chili (or whoever). Young and in love, who among us has not been there? They don’t play those love songs on the radio for nothing. How many stupid decisions have been made and are STILL made because of that fickle fellow with the bow and heart arrow? If you want to know, visit your local divorce proceeding. Anywho, there are three sides to every story, his, hers and the truth. He is not a liar, nor is she and it is not for anyone to judge their reality. Would you want anyone to judge your past transgressions? I think not. Mistakes happen and this was one of them. It’s not his/her first and it won’t be his/her last.
His mother is a good one though. Yes , he has learned a better lesson than she could have EVER taught him. HOWEVER, I know that on occasion she has to get a dig in there. If not Jonetta, you are missing out :o ) I would LOVE saying “I told you so”. Mothers, for whatever reason, always know best. Usher will listen to you next time I bet . For those of you who are berating him about being a ‘Mama’s boy’, don’t hate. My husband AND my 2 son’s are Mama’s boys and I wouldn’t have it any other way.Ladies, remember, how a man treats his mother is how he will treat you.
My teenage son knows that I have standards as to who he dates and will eventually marry. He will NOT roll up to the house with any old ‘LaQuinesha’ and expect me to take her. I get my checklist out and start marking it when they walk in the door. By the way, she doesn’t even get in the door if her name is LaQuinesha…lol

nypeach

September 17th, 2012
8:38 am

PREACH pw, you told the truth! totally agree with you 100 percent.

Granny

September 17th, 2012
8:38 am

I so agree with “Dee” and “pw”, thank you for so eloquently saying what I’ve been saying for years. Ladies, be smart, don’t have babies for every man you lay with please. Stop having these random babies. You can control that. These poor kids deserve to be in a family where there is love so that they don’t end up raising themselves and becoming another sad statistic.

truthbtold

September 17th, 2012
9:04 am

How these older women think that they are going to lock down a younger man just defies logic. They are just building his self esteem and are only a conquest. An older woman has a different mindset geared from her experiences not geared toward youth. Look at Jennifer Lopez, Eva Longoria, Gabrielle Union, Vivica Fox, and others chasing after boy toys only to get played later on. It used to be that women were more mature than their male counterparts at the same age. Now I think that over the last two decades that women mentally have reversed.

[...] Divorce, Custody Battle, and BreakdownRap-Up.comUsher Talks About Failed Marriage With OprahVibeUsher opens up to OprahAtlanta Journal Constitution (blog)The Gossip Girls -BETall 103 news [...]

J.J.

September 17th, 2012
9:58 am

Usher and his Mother came over as honest and real…Foster clearly is still a bitter woman who did not want to let the CASH MACHINE AND CREDIT CARD MACHINE go…She came over as a less than a good parent figure and delegator of care to others…A MOTHER SHOULD NEVER LET HER CHILDREN SEE BAD BEHAVIOR OR DISPLAY BAD BEHAVIOR WHEN THEY ARE IN THE AREA.
A “low lifed” person can not control and will manifest the “hoodify” regardless!!!!! No class always shows.

Tootie

September 17th, 2012
9:58 am

Prayers are with you usher, we live our lives only to answer to one judge and thats god. I wish the best for you and your sons, Tomeka was an older woman and should have known better in life to leave her family and expect everything was going to be okay. I feel she was older and stupid.
May god bless you for being a father to your kids and fighting for them. Prayer to Tomeka that she will wake up and realize her own mistakes of life, love and family. Keep your head up learn from this and do better.

Tracy

September 17th, 2012
10:06 am

@Janine
You got that all wrong Usher is not the one bitter it is Tomeka.I will tell you what was wrong with the 50/50 joint custody arrangement. Tomeka would not hold up to her end of the agreement. When it came time for Usher to have his time with the boys Tomeka did not follow the agreement. She used the boys against Usher. Hence the reason for going into court.
@Bunnie
If you have been following the case Usher requested a delay in the case because of the death of her son. The judge said NO as well as Tomeka. She pushed for the trail to go forward

[...] Divorce, Custody Battle, and BreakdownRap-Up.comUsher Talks About Failed Marriage With OprahVibeUsher opens up to OprahAtlanta Journal Constitution (blog)The Gossip Girls -BETall 132 news [...]

tinachi

September 17th, 2012
10:35 am

Nothing against, Tameka, but Usher did the right thing to get custody of his boys. I believe that any mother who has kids love them just as much as the next. However I don’t understand how you can let your child (Kyle) go on a family vacay, and you are not present. You are somewhere out of town, not saying she didnt give permission, but you are not there to watch over your child while he play in the water. A accident happen, and you are flown back to Atlanta to see about your child. There is no way in hell I am too busy to be with my kids, while they play in a area surrounded by water .She may have consider it to be safe around her family, but still as a parent she should have been there to supervise her kids. So in a way I can see why Usher has taken the steps to get his boys, it seem as though he is always with them and protecting them, except like he stated while working. Yes he may have cheated, and I notice he struggle with some his answers during the interview. But like the others on this board has stated, we do not know all the facts. A man is not going to cheat for nothing, he’s cheating because of something going wrong in his relationship. And apparently his mother saw it, and Usher decided to go forward with this relationship with Tameka. Point blank this woman seems to be a little crazy from the beginning to the end, and all he saw was the booty!

Whatevs

September 17th, 2012
11:49 am

@tinachi… Kyle was with his FATHER. Or do you think Tameka laid him from an egg?? I’ve traveled on business and my kids were with their FATHER, to whom I’m divorced from. If something happened to one of them on his watch, would I blame him for an ACCIDENT?? No. And I would be damned if someone called me a bad mother for being “away” whether for business or a girl’s weekend in NYC. Your comment was based on lack of facts… sort of like a lot of comments on here. I’m former friends with both Tameka AND Usher. I moved away from Atlanta and recently returned and kept in contact with her, mainly because she’s a woman. She’s been through hell and simply 99.9999% of what’s written about her is untrue (i.e., she’s unemployed, broke, bitter, absentee, crazy, etc…). She’s a business owner, has been on dates, grounded, and successful.

Usher turns his “indescretions” and personal issues into a platinum selling album (Confessions, Raymond v Raymond) and his legions fall all over themselves because he’s sexy, famous, & rich. Meanwhile, the women behind him get called bitter, ugly, crazy, jealous, gold diggers, etc. Please believe there were PLENTY of women who didn’t like Rozanda after his breakup with her and called her names… and please believe there will be another album after his relationship with Grace is over.

M.Johnson

September 17th, 2012
12:46 pm

I hate that Oprah gave this man a platform to repair his image without allowing time for his ex to speak. He SHOULD have been on the “Fix My Life” program rather than playing damage control with Oprah.

He seems to keep repeating lots of damaging patterns, falling for unavailable older women. Maybe it’s time to figure out why that happens rather than waiting for him to channel those thoughts into the latest single.

SAD.

Orville

September 17th, 2012
1:20 pm

Wow a lot of jealous women on this board first off Tameka is a gold digger and I am glad she LOST custody of the boys! The judge obviously knew that Usher is the better parent that’s why he got custody. People seem to casually forget that Tameka bragged about using Usher’s credit card she only wanted Usher’s money. However, now that Tameka isn’t getting Usher’s money she’s bitter. Well too bad so glad this bitch is gone!

Usher’s mother warned him that Tameka was trash but Usher had to learn the hard way. Thank goodness he is divorced and moved on.

miekal

September 17th, 2012
1:55 pm

WHY OPRAH AND USHER CANT BAIL OUT MORRIS BROWN? U NO THEY GOT THE MONEY!

MIND -YO-BIZNESS

September 17th, 2012
2:00 pm

Everyone in the world has a comment about her or she and wants to point the blame and finger at the person they don’t like be it male or female. You don’t know the whole story, so keep your opinion to yourself and mind yo bizness. You probably got a worse mess going on in your own life and are bitter yourself. Mind yo bizness and stay out of the next mans or womans affairs.

Hotbugs

September 17th, 2012
3:22 pm

vjsim4

September 17th, 2012
4:21 pm

@Zor and Janie…I agree with both of your comments. I didn’t find Usher to be honest at all with Oprah. He was doing alot of lying. I wondered if Oprah knew or felt he was lying. It’s sad how affluent black men are treating black women who have given birth to their children these days; just because they don’t want to pay child support.

Irving

September 17th, 2012
4:28 pm

No longer an Usher fan.