“Rock of Ages”: It’s the songs, stupid!
Tom Cruise and his zero-body fat. Photo credit: Matt Sayles/Invision/AP
Hasn’t anyone seen the Broadway show from which this movie spawned?
It’s ridiculous! A cliché-fest from the moment we’re introduced to “Sherri Christian,” just a small-town girl escaping her lonely world in search of fame on the ‘80s-era Sunset Strip.
No one should be surprised that the movie follows the same goofy path considering the source material. But that source material was nominated for five Tonys in 2009 (it didn’t win any) and the show is still holding steady on Broadway, playing to about 94 percent capacity last month.
So lots of people like it.
And I’m one of them. But it isn’t the storyline – part of which is nearly identical to the video for Poison’s “Fallen Angel” – that prodded me to the movie theater on a Friday morning.
It’s the music.
Blasphemous, you say? Well, get over it. Plenty of us with respect for Dylan, Springsteen, Aretha, The Beatles, Aerosmith, Johnny Cash, the Beach Boys and any other “real music” artist you want to add to that list, also have an affinity for hair metal.
It’s fun. It’s mindless. And if you grew up in the ‘80s, it was inescapable.
And those are the reasons to see “Rock of Ages.”
Well, those and Tom Cruise, who brings such a loony intensity to chiseled rock god Stacee Jaxx, he’s mesmerizing. And while he’s no Jon Bon Jovi, Cruise clearly took notes and delivers “Wanted Dead or Alive” with wild-eyed passion. He’s just a guy who is a peacock on the outside and a (cliché alert!) bleeding-heart loner on the inside. Like every other sensitive rocker who commandeered MTV in the ‘80s.
What “Rock of Ages,” the movie, does extremely well is tuck in tiny nods to the era: The bus that Sherrie arrives on is number “1984.” A slightly heard “I Will Remember You” from Skid Row plays in the background of Tower Records (let’s all pause for a moment of silence to remember that musical Mecca). The shot of someone reading Creem magazine during the Venice Beach montage set to Poison’s “Talk Dirty to Me.” The singalong of “We Built This City” outside the fictional Bourbon Room, where a crowd pan spots REO Speedwagon’s Kevin Cronin, Skid Row’s Sebastian Bach and Extreme’s Nuno Bettencourt (the credits also list Debbie/Deborah Gibson, but I totally missed her).
Oh, and even though he isn’t an ‘80s rocker, how cool was it to see Constantine Maroulis, the original “Drew” in the Broadway production (as well as the touring show that played Atlanta last year) in a blink-and-you’ll-miss-it cameo as a record exec?
So what if Alec Baldwin can't sing? He got to wear that rad hair! Photo credit: David James/MCT
Something else that “Rock” excels at – perhaps even moreso than “Glee” lately – is the mashup.
The “Shadows of the Night/Harden My Heart” pairing with Mary J. Blige and Julianne Hough was, simply, great. And not only do you get “Juke Box Hero/I Love Rock ‘n’ Roll” (aka air guitar heaven), but you get to hear Alec Baldwin and Russell Brand sing most of it! Sure, Baldwin is pretty much this year’s Pierce Brosnan, but did he not look as if he were having a blast?
That’s what matters when you go see “Rock of Ages.” It’s not a great movie. It’s barely a watchable one. But the novelty aspect of seeing a top-notch cast fist-pumping to Journey’s now-forever-resurrected anthem (thanks, Sopranos!) “Don’t Stop Believin’” is enough to make you walk out of the theater with a little rock ‘n’ roll strut.
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By Melissa Ruggieri, Atlanta Music Scene
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24 comments Add your comment
Noel Cook
June 16th, 2012
5:37 pm
Did I hear the song “You spin me right round” at one point in the movie?
Rich_PA
June 16th, 2012
5:49 pm
Thank God! Finally someone wrote something accurate. All the bad mouthing about Tom C. was crazy. I can’t believe all the haters and “WHY”… Everyone always says about the sofa jump…. who cares. Is our society so bad that we hate someone because of a good thing. All the guy did was profess his love. We’ve all done silly things out of love. Give him a break. He truly cares about his craft and take it to the limit.
And as far as this movie and the 80’s … this article is right on. The 80’s were the best the music was upbeat to have a good time. The ballets pulled the strings of the heart. It was all about fun which is what this film is about. I can’t believe how society just wants beat down something positive.
Thanks for this article … I began to think I was the only one who could appreciate ROCK OF AGES
Melissa W (ID)
June 16th, 2012
6:01 pm
You know, I thought the movie was awesome- cheesy, but awesome! I felt like I was reliving my middle school years, and knew every song. I loved the cameo’s and my husban dand I left pretty impressed.
Rich- and I agree, all I’ve heard is bad, but I really loved it. 
resr
June 16th, 2012
7:28 pm
Good memories, awesome songs… Tom Cruise was hot.
cb
June 16th, 2012
7:47 pm
Totally agree! Cheesy and predictable, but I loved every minute of it. Even the “Gentlemen’s Club” and suggestive scenes are tastefully done. The songs (all among the very best of the 80’s) are done well by the cast. I was wanting to dance in the aisle! The little things I saw (that can be added to the article above) include cordless telephones and peelable label beer bottles…LOTS of memories through the whole movie. There are laugh out loud moments…fun and lighthearted movie.
Liberryldy
June 16th, 2012
8:38 pm
It was a fun movie, enjoyed it for music and the cheesy storyline…sometimes that’s what makes movies good, they are just “fun”!
Jeff
June 16th, 2012
9:11 pm
My wife and I loved the movie! The cast worked well with each other and steamed fun! Cheesy but so were the 80s. Loved the cordless phone and record store. Wanted to flick my bic, but no smoking or lighters in the movies these days! Where is my walkman?
Marni
June 16th, 2012
10:04 pm
I hate to disagree with you but I enjoyed every single toe-tapping, sing-along blast of a great time with this movie!! The acting was good the singing great and returning me back to my use was so worth the price of the ticket!! I recommend it to anyone but especially those who grew up in the 80’s. Thank you.
Amy
June 16th, 2012
10:06 pm
Jeff, you need a genuine Rock of Ages LED lighter! lol I had mine last night for the 10:00pm showing! I enjoyed the movie, but of course, the broadway show far excels. I think the movie could have used a LOT more humor in it. The BW show embraces the cheese and is humorous from beginning to end.
Michele
June 16th, 2012
10:16 pm
JUST SIMPLY FUN, FUN FUN!!!!
Helped me remember the 80’s fondly!! Tom C. did a great job. this is no oscar movie, but sometimes I just want to see something FUN!!! and this did it!!
JaoTao
June 16th, 2012
10:21 pm
I loved it … It was fun. TC was surprisingly good as well. And there is choreography by Mia Michaels. Check this movie out and have a good time!
Matt H
June 17th, 2012
12:18 am
After seeing the stage show last year at the Fox Theatre, I was very excited about this movie. Sure, some things were rearranged or omitted, but it was still a very fun movie. I knew not to expect a strong story, but that’s not why I went to see it anyway. The mashups were well done and the music flowed perfectly. Definitely recommend seeing it in theaters to take advantage of superior sound.
Patty H
June 17th, 2012
7:01 am
Not a big TC fan but I thought he did a great job in this movie. I laughed and smiled for 2 hours. Whats not to like?
Betty
June 17th, 2012
11:08 am
The movie was fabulous- enjoyed every minute of it. Tom Cruise was amazing- he put his heart and soul into every move!!!! It was fun, entertaining and well -done. I left the theatre feeling energized! The music was beautiful.
TG
June 17th, 2012
2:56 pm
I saw Rock of Ages on Broadway ond loved it, so I couldn’t wait for the movie. It took me back in time with good memories. I love 80’s music. Yes a bit cheesy but it was a fun movie. The only thing I missed the live Broadway show had that the movie didn’t, people singing, clapping, dancing in your seat, and fist pumping, like you were at a rock concert. I think all the characters were cast perfectly. Tom was awesome! Julianne & Diego were so cute together and both can really sing.
Mickey Mouse
June 17th, 2012
7:39 pm
I thought it was a great movie. So it was a little cheesy, but it was still good acting and overall good music and singing
Gerry
June 17th, 2012
7:46 pm
LOOOOVVVEEE it!! Was just total fun! Music was great! And I am old!!
Cary Herold
June 17th, 2012
8:32 pm
Fun, whacked movie. Tom Cruise was a hoot and I’m not even a fan of his. Loved the entire cast who looked like they having so much fun. Screw the bad reviews.
Joansie
June 17th, 2012
8:57 pm
Glad to see positive reviews. I agree, I LOVED it. Yeah, cheesy, yeah, “camp” (as my grandpa would say), but everyone did a phenomenal job with their roles. Who knew Tom Cruise could sing? Yeah, I’m a “head banging” chick from way back…there wasn’t enough of that music to satisfy me (yeah, I’m over 50) I will go to the theater to see it again (never said that about any movie) and I will buy the DVD. Just a rockin good time. Folks, try not to read too much into it…it’s not a social statement or political…JUST FUN!!!
Shira V.
June 17th, 2012
11:02 pm
I loved it. I can’t say I saw the musical so I do not have that to match. However as a movie it was great. It started from the get go and I didn’t even waste a second thinking ‘ok lets to the next good part’ like I do with most other movies. Also, I almost had an asthma attack cause I was laughing so hard during most of the movie. Though what I loved the most was that I knew every single one of those songs and they were mashed up so well together. My dad called it GOS. Granted it was cliche and cheesy, but if you look at some of the movies dubbed as the ‘greatest’ of time, they are cliche and cheesy, and I definitely walked out of there with a headbangers attitude. Though I wasn’t all that impressed with the characters of Drew and Sherri, I loved all the other characters especially ‘Hey Man’. I personally will go back and see it again and definitely will be getting the DVD. Thank you for your positive review.
PS: GOS= glee on steroids.
Mohillgrl
June 18th, 2012
2:52 pm
Loved it. Yes indeed cheesy but Tom Cruise was amazing. Alec Baldwin does it for me too. I’m not a 80’s fan but had fun at this movie.
Praveen
June 20th, 2012
7:13 am
I personally prefer rock musicals with their own rock sensibility. Like Hedwig. I know Hedwig originated as a musical play too, but it has more of a nice indie sensibility than the soccer mom broadway vibe. Why the hell is every property being made into a musical these days?
I wouldn’t be shocked if there is a musical using grunge music from the 90s at some point.
Laura
June 20th, 2012
2:56 pm
Thank you thank you thank you for this review. I LOVED this movie and I had such a good time!! MUSIC is the reason for a musical, while plot is just the string to hang those big shiny beads of a song on. Pure entertainment!
Steve B
June 20th, 2012
5:11 pm
I almost didn’t go see it because of the bad reviews. My wife and I went anyway late sunday night and loved it. Everyone’s right, it’s all about the music and I enjoyed seeing the songs performed that way.