Money and Marriage: All the reasons to talk $$$ before wedlock
One of the leading causes of divorce — if not the number one reason — is money. Whether it’s the stress caused by a lack of money coming into the household, or differences in the way each party values money, arguments and worse often ensue. You can help yourself and your relationship by talking ahead of time about long-term financial goals, spending habits, saving and about what money means to you.
For instance, do you know your partner’s credit history or score? How much debt does he or she? How far will your partner extend himself or herself to help a parent or family member financially? If you’ve never had these discussions, you should.
I’ve found two resources that couples will find helpful. If you’re newly married, contemplating marriage, or you’ve been married for years, take the time to go over this together.
First, tips from the Dollar Stretcher. Here’s an excerpt:
Determine what is important to both of you, and agree to work together to accomplish your goals, whether they include paying off your debt, saving for a down payment on a home, or retirement planning. If you’re both on the same page for your long-term goals, you’re less likely to argue about short-term spending.
Also, listen to this podcast from U.S. News and World Report’s Alpha Consumer reporter, Kimberly Palmer.
Did you and your partner discuss finances before marrying? Are in favor of joint or separate accounts, and why? How important are financial goals in your relationship?
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3 comments Add your comment
David S
September 18th, 2009
4:42 pm
Really want to make a positive money decision regarding marriage – elope! Don’t listen to your friends, family or anyone who cares more about going to your wedding than your happiness or your finances. Unless they are picking up the entire bill, tell them to shove it and turn your honeymoon into the site of your nuptules. A romantic wedding on the beach in Maui sure beats a second-rate honeymoon and an overpriced day of nightmares and headaches. Worse still is overextending yourselves financially and starting your marriage off in debt all to please a bunch of folks who won’t remember your wedding the morning after.
Oh, and if you actually think that money is “yours” and “mine” in a marriage, don’t bother to waste the resources that your wedding, household, and ultimate divorce will consume. Get your head straight that marriage is a shared partnership before you commit. Anything else is doomed to failure.
Philosopher
September 20th, 2009
4:06 am
If nightmares are bad, daymares must be good.
cjniya
October 10th, 2009
9:19 am
It was a sunny afternoon, on the grass in that habitation, people walking in a elegant style. It is a high class party, only the gentle giggle and low voice could be heard as the wind blew past. Even the rubber wristbands they used in that party are in silver in order to match the elegant dresses of ladies. It seemed as a peaceful place and it should be the model for every party in this country.
But when you looked around, you might see some girls, who were beautiful but just seemed out of place there. They must be the models, but they seemed a little bit empty. They laughed happily for the topic they could not understand. When these rich men talked about this economic crisis, they just stood there and smiled as the Barbie. If you want them to answer the questions raise in the topic, the answer they are likely to give is “world peace”. They attend these parties as the represents of some charity organizations. But in fact, these parties are blind dates for them. It is good chance for them to meet some rich businessmen or the young men with promised future.
They just consider marriage as kind of trade. The passion, the feeling between the two parties, the age or even the true love thing does not matter in the marriage, but the money rules—- or they say money rocks. For them, the beauty is their capitalized cost, the gift from god, with it they could earn more and more money by dating with rich men. Nothing is totally free in this world, the good looking could be one kind of cost but I think that is not enough for making money. As one reply for the blonde’s amour, the beautiful appearance would be cost in time but the fortune could increase by time. Why people should accept this marriage? If the marriage is a trade, the only cost for it should be true love.